Like with all my other epilogue fics, this one was supposed to just be a oneshot. But it kind of started to write itself, and so it is going to end up being a two or three-parter. This is the first part.

A big thank-you needs to go to Yanina (qdecim on Tumblr), because she helped a lot with this. First inadvertently when I stumbled across an excellent text post which explains why Kousei/Emi is an amazing ship in a clear way. Before that, I wasn't really sure how to explain why I shipped them. Anyway, she then directly helped me by letting me bounce Kousei/Emi ideas off her. So, if you're reading this, THANK YOU!

"And erm, what else? Oh, yeah! I won the last 'challenge'. Takeshi's not happy with that, at all. But, I wonder, what song should I pick this time? "

Kousei paused, and wondered what else to say. It had been nearly two years since Kaori Miyazono had died- next April, he'd be in his third year in high school. It hadn't been an easy two years, for he still had panic attacks from time to time, and there were some pieces he still found it hard to play without being drowned in sorrow. But he had managed, and flourished, and he no longer felt like he lived in a monotone world. He had grown up, as Hiroko would often tell him. And during all that time, whenever he had come home, whether it was for the weekend or for holidays, he made a point of visiting the cemetery, so that he could update both Kaori and his mother on the things that had been going on in his life. It had become something of a ritual, and it was comforting.

He was just about to complain about Takeshi's song choices, when Nagi's voice interrupted him.

"Talking to yourself again, Sensei? That's the first sign of madness, you know." The comment was made in a jokey tone of voice, and Kousei turned to see Nagi with Koharu, both of them trying hard not to giggle. Eventually, Koharu couldn't stop herself and she laughed and ran up to Kousei.

"Kou-nii!" she shrieked, leaping into his arms.

"Hello, Koharu-Chan." Kousei smiled, and after hugging Koharu, got up.

"So, since you came all this way to find me, do you want an extra lesson, Nagi-san?" Kousei asked, jokingly. As predicted, Nagi pouted impressively.

"Arima-sensei! School's just broken up for Winter Break! And I have a lesson with you tomorrow!"

"Play for me, play for me!" Koharu interjected, running around in circles in front of them as they began walking out of the cemetery.

"Sure thing, Koharu-Chan." Kousei said. At first, both he and Hiroko had thought that Koharu would become a pianist too, but she had ended up showing more interest in ballet, and for fun, whenever Koharu came to visit, he would play some Tchaikovsky on the piano, and she would spin around and around in glee. All that was needed was for Hiroko to find ballet lessons that Koharu could attend.

"Hey, you wouldn't want to disappoint Koharu-Chan now, would you?" he whispered to Nagi. She pulled a face at him, and then grinned, silently telling him that she didn't mind.

"Anyway." She said, changing the subject. "Did I hear you say that you won the last round with Onii-Chan? He's going to be moaning about it at dinner tonight, isn't he?"

Kousei laughed, and then proceeded to tell her about their recent 'challenge'. These had been a tradition that had started soon after he had begun his life as a high-school student. To his surprise, both Takeshi and Emi had been in the same class as him, and they quickly started hanging out as a trio, supporting and teasing each other in equal measure. they were 'The Piano Musketeers' , as Tsubaki put it. But Takeshi, ever the competitive soul, had proposed that every week or so, they should pick a piece of music, and each play it to determine who the best was. They had started with classical pieces, and then moved on to soundtracks from games, movies and anime. Emi was their initially reluctant judge, but she soon got into it, giving the 'loser' a forfeit of having to carry everyone else's bags for the week, or buying them all lunch the next day. She also proposed that the winner would choose the next piece to play. Kousei enjoyed these 'challenges', as they gave him a fresh angle on his playing. It was also just a whole lot of fun.

"Kou-nii, I'm hungry!"

"Do you want to buy something to eat, or shall we wait until we're at my house?"

"Buy something, buy something!" Koharu said, jumping up and down. Then, she remembered her manners and added "Please!"

So they stopped off at the convenience store, and bought more snacks than they would actually need, and headed over to Kousei's house.

"Give me a moment." Kousei said as he opened the door and went upstairs to leave his bag in his bedroom. He paused to look through his window, and saw that Tsubaki was home. He rapped on the window, and Tsubaki looked up. He waved, and she grinned.

"You're coming for dinner, remember?" she mouthed. Kousei nodded, and gave her a thumbs up, before waving again and running downstairs. I have amazing friends, he thought. He was better able to appreciate that than he had been two years ago.

When he went into the room where his piano was kept, Nagi was already sitting at the piano, her coat and school bag carelessly flung into a corner. Koharu had also put her bag there, and was taking off her coat.

"I hope you weren't going to start without me, Nagi-san."

"Don't be ridiculous, Arima-sensei!" Nagi shuffled over on the bench to make room for him, and he sat down.

"So, Sleeping Beauty Waltz then?" he asked. Nagi nodded.

"Sleeping Beauty Waltz." She confirmed.

And then, they began to play.

…

The final year of high school went by quickly for all of them. Watari's football team went from strength to strength, as did he, himself. He even visited the United Kingdom a few times, as preparation for when he would inevitably have to move there. But Watari was clear on the fact that he did not want to make a permanent move until after he was twenty, and they'd had their Coming-Of-Age ceremony. In the meantime, he was still himself, drifting in and out of relationships with girls without a care in the world, but still being the good, supportive friend he was.

Tsubaki still continued to play baseball for fun, but she eventually decided a sporting career was not for her. Somehow, in the process of studying hard for the sake of attending a high-school near Kousei's, she had developed an interest in academia, which persisted even after her feelings for Kousei faded and settled into those of a deep friendship. So she decided to study to get a place in a university, and just see where life took her.

Kashiwagi also wanted to go into university. Surprising everyone who knew her (apart from Tsubaki ,who knew of her BL manga addiction) , she wanted to become someone who wrote an advice column in a magazine, specialising in romance and relationship issues. To that end, she decided that she would study psychology. But before that, she was going to travel the world. Her life was also turned upside down by the unexpected arrival of little sister Mio. But it was a change she seemed to welcome.

Naturally, Takeshi, Emi and Kousei were all going to continue being pianists. They all wanted to peform professionally, but Kousei had the extra ambition of wanting to teach the piano as well. In their final year, one of their assignments was to compose a short piece of their own, and peform it in a special concert near the end of the year, and all three of them found inspiration from their own lives. Takeshi wrote a long, catchy yet powerful piece called 'Goodbye, Hero', Emi's was a soulful and angry piece titled 'Unchanging Love Song'.
And Kousei, being Kousei wrote two pieces. The one he ended up using was called 'In the Sunflower Fields', inspired by something Emi had told him about his performances as a child. But it was the other piece, the first one he had written, that was the one he was the most proud of. But it was too close to his heart. That piece was titled 'Cherry Blossom Ghosts', and he kept it in a drawer, safe, for the day he would be brave enough to share it with the world.

…

"Ahh, that speech was so BORING!" Tsubaki complained as their small group followed countless other 20-year-olds out of the town hall and into the hall where the real celebrations were happening. She looked in her small bag for her mobile, and then pushed up the long sleeves of her kimono so they wouldn't get in the way of her sending a text.

"Oh, oh, look at that! She's sending another text to Tadashi-kun!" Watari commented, spotting Tsubaki do this.

"Ah, it's really quite funny. When you were going out with Saito-sempai, you couldn't stop talking about Arima-kun, and now you're with Tadashi, you can't stop telling us about him. Or contacting him." Kashiwagi observed. Tsubaki gave them both a death-glare, visibly refraining from kicking them.

"Did that really happen?" Kousei wondered aloud, looking cluelessly at his childhood friends. Emi couldn't help but snicker at his expression. His denseness was refreshing, even now. He turned and pulled a face at her, before turning back to Watari, who was sighing and shaking his head.

"Kousei," Watari said slowly, "Have a think about that." Kousei obliged willingly, and then sighed.

"Ah, we were children then." He reasoned, smiling. Then, his stomach rumbled. He blinked, and looked down for a moment, then turned around to look at Takeshi and Emi.

"What do you say to some food?" he asked them. Takeshi grinned.

"Let's celebrate becoming members of society in style!" he crowed, leading the way. Emi rolled her eyes, hoping she wouldn't have to deal with a drunken Takeshi by the end of the night. Unfortunately, she thought that she would. But if that did happen, she'd rope Kousei into helping, too.

Watari, Kashiwagi and Tsubaki went to talk to some other people they knew, and Emi was glad. The only thing she really had in common with those three happened to be a friendship with Kousei. They weren't bad people, per se (although initially Watari had irritated her by calling her 'Emi-Chan' right from the beginning, and it had been Tsubaki who had coined the annoying term 'Piano Musketeers' to describe her, Takeshi and Kousei), but she just found it difficult to hang around with them. But for now, she decided to forget all that, and just enjoy the night.

As she sat, eating with Takeshi and Kousei and discussing the finer points of food and music (with the occasional foray into the topic of younger sisters), she found her eyes drifting to Kousei more often than she wanted.

His smiles, his laughter, and the way he would blink in confusion. How he couldn't seem to decide whether he should leave his tie tight or loose. The sorrow etched around his eyes, which still sparkled behind his glasses. He'd changed so much, and so many times, and he was no longer the same boy she'd seen at five years old. He wasn't even the human metronome or the lost, tragic mess. Yet, she still recognised the source of her reason for playing. He was just Kousei Arima, simple as that. And that made him radiant.

Later in the night, when Tsubaki had dragged him away to talk to some of the girls from their middle school, he found himself looking for an escape, and his gaze fell on Emi Igawa. The strong presence she'd had at fourteen had increased and grown with her now, and the red and gold kimono she was wearing only served to heighten this. He noticed how she was the only one of the girls in the room whose hair wasn't tied, decorated with hairpins, or both. He could also swear that he could pick out the rich honey tones of her voice from the hundreds of voices that crisscrossed everywhere. In other words, she was beautiful.

Oh. Oh, right, she is.

He sat there, and let the confusion hit him. He looked away from Emi, and continued the conversations he was reluctantly having, relieved nobody had noticed him staring. Then, at the nearest opportunity, he excused himself, and went outside for air.

It was cold, but not that much, so he wasn't worried. He sat on a bench, and looked up at the clear night sky. Then, he reached into his pocket and pulled out the photo he had carried with him. It was one he normally kept in a frame on his bedside table wherever he was living, but he had brought it with him today, for luck.

I haven't forgotten you. I haven't. He silently repeated those words over and over to the smiling face of five-year-old Kaori.

"Oh, you're out here as well." Emi stated, surprising Kousei as she came out and sat on the bench next to him.

"Not well?" she enquired. Kousei shook his head, then noticed Emi looking curiously at the photograph he was holding.

"I was just thinking, we're celebrating our Coming of Age, and Miyazono-san's never going to come of age."

"That's hardly your fault." Emi scolded, gently. She was familiar with Kaori Miyazono, if only as a story, a legend of sorts. The girl who'd managed to get Kousei back into music, and then died. She took a closer look at the little girl in the photograph, scrutinising the smile and the bright eyes, the way she was flashing a peace-sign at the camera. There was no hint of the sadness that was to come. Then she noticed the other side of the picture.

"Is that you?" she asked, incredulously. Her eyes moved from the little boy accidentally captured in the photo to Kaori and back again. Suddenly, she realised that there was another reason she recognised the little girl.

"That is me. She saw my first ever performance, you know." He said, wistfully, recalling the contents of the letter that he kept safe in his drawers.

"I did too!" Emi said, surprised. Kousei turned to look at her, and she mentally face-palmed. Kousei already knew this, she had said as much before. But she hadn't told the whole story. On an impulse, she decided he deserved to know.

"I was so moved, I started crying afterwards. I decided to become a pianist at that point. " She confessed. She pointed to Kaori in the photo, but Kousei had already connected the dots.

"You sat next to her. You're the little crying girl." He said, blinking. Emi nodded. Kousei sighed, and then gave a slight smile.

"I know it wasn't my fault, or anyone's. I just think of her, from time to time. I just miss her." He said, referring to the earlier comment Emi had made. He slipped the photo back inside his pocket. Then, they looked up at the sky together, not saying a word.

After a while, he turned to Emi, hoping to gaze upon her now that they were in a quiet moment. But when he did, he saw her staring at him too. Almost on reflex, they both reddened and turned away from each other. They remained like that for a moment, and then, Kousei tried again, only to find that Emi was watching him, again.

"Don't you dare look away." She whispered, fiercely, her eyes burning with anger and something else he couldn't quite name. It reminded him of the way she played. It was also similar to the way she'd get him to deal with panic attacks in school, when his hands shook too much to be able to put them on the keys. She'd sit next to him, and start playing half of a duet, or even a solo piece, taunting him with the incomplete sound until he started playing to fill in the gaps. Now, she was taunting him with her gaze. If he looked away, something would always be incomplete.

"To be honest," He replied, hesitantly "I don't want to look away." Carefully, he edged across the bench until they were so close their foreheads were touching.

"I don't want to." He repeated. Emi's eyes flickered, and he realised all over again how beautiful she was. Gently, reached out to tuck a stray lock of her hair behind her ear, and kept his hand there. Emi's eyes widened, but she didn't look away, or move back. Time passed by, without the two of them saying anything. The sounds of the celebrations inside could be heard, but they didn't register any of those sounds. They just existed, in their own little world. And then, as if it was somehow predestined, as if everything had been leading up to that little moment, they kissed.

Another lifetime passed before they pulled away from each other. Almost automatically, they reached for each other's hands. Emi looked down at them, noticing how carefully and gently Kousei's hands seemed to grip hers, and how hers seem to fit in that grip perfectly.

Pianist's hands, she thought. Kousei's hands.

"Hey, Emi?" Kousei sounded hesitant, and a little scared. Emi looked back up at him, and to her surprise saw that his eyes were glittering with unshed tears, even though he seemed happy, as if he had realised something good.

"Hmm?"

"I think…I think I might be falling in love with you." The surprise in Kousei's voice made Emi laugh, unexpectedly.

"You know what? I think I might be falling in love with you, too.

…

Emi took the bunch of flowers from Kousei so that he could slot the sprigs of cherry blossoms into the other bouquet, and then retie the ribbon that was originally around it. It was April, and Kousei was making one of his frequent visits to the cemetery to visit both his mother and Kaori Miyazono. As Emi didn't have any performances, and didn't have to go to her part time job at the coffee store until later that day, she decided to accompany him.

"Here, I'll hold that one now." Emi exchanged the flowers she was holding with the cherry-blossom bouquet Kousei was holding, so that when they got to Saki Arima's gravestone, he could put the flowers down.

"Thanks." Kousei smiled at Emi, and she smiled back. They fell into a comfortable silence as they entered the cemetery, the only sounds being their footsteps, their breathing and the spring breeze.

They arrived at Saki Arima's gravestone first. Emi's opinions on the woman had changed dramatically. As a child, she had been annoyed, for in her eyes, this was the woman who had changed the pianist who inspired her into the human metronome that the classical music circles couldn't get enough of. But time and maturity had changed that, and all she saw was a sad story of hopelessness and mistakes that nobody had wanted to make. That, and the woman was Kousei's mother. With both her parents alive and well, Emi knew what having a mother meant to a person.

And that was demonstrated in the way Kousei gently put the flowers down in front of the headstone.

"Hi, Mum." He spoke. "Emi's with me today. How are you doing, wherever you are? I hope there's a piano there, so that you can play. We both still play, here in the living world, although we don't have any competitions or concerts coming up. I've got two new students who might be coming to me tomorrow though."

"And I'm performing at Tsubaki-san's wedding next month. " Emi added. "They wanted Kousei to play, but he should be a guest, so I offered, since I don't really know her that well."

"You remember Tsubaki, don't you, Mum? She lived next door to us. Can you honestly imagine her, of all people, settling down and getting married at 21?" Kousei laughed. "But she is. She's really serious about Tadashi. And I'm glad for her. We all are."

Kousei continued prattling on, and Emi occasionally interjected. The conversation felt a little bit like what she imagined they would have talked about if Saki Arima was alive. But there was no way of knowing, so she pushed aside the line of thought.

When they had finished at his mother's grave, they headed over to Kaori Miyazono's grave. This time, Emi put the flowers down, but she didn't say anything as Kousei talked. Although she had gone to visit Kousei's mother's grave many times before, she hadn't been to Kaori's all that often. But she had thought a lot about the girl.

"Emi, I've finished."

Emi blinked, realising she had been lost in thought.

"Oh, okay." She started to walk off with Kousei, and then made an impulse decision.

"Actually, you go on ahead. I want to tell her something."

Kousei opened his mouth to ask her what she meant, and then thought better of it. He shrugged.

"Okay then. I'll meet you at the gate. Don't take too long!"

Emi waited until Kousei was completely out of earshot, and then knelt down in front of the headstone.

"Kaori. I know we didn't really meet, but I feel like we both know each other, so I'll just call you that. After all, 16 years ago, did we not sit next to each other while watching the same recital? Did we not get inspired by the same boy, all those years ago? We're exactly the same, but in completely different ways. Yet…it was you who reached him first, and now you're residing in a particular piece of his heart. That piece will never be open, to anyone, at all. Not even me. And he loves me. I know he does. So, on some level, as a woman, I'm pretty damn jealous of you. I envy you for the time you had with him, and how you managed to reach him.

But…at the same time, we were never just girls, were we? We're also musicians. It's how we live, how we breathe. We're defined by music. Kousei is too, but yet I know when you met him, back when we were fourteen that you were both dying. Well, technically, you were the one actually dying. He was just doing so mentally, because he was avoiding playing. Post-traumatic stress, or something. Yet you were blown into his life and changed all of that. You brought him back, and in doing so he gave you a reason to fight your fate. I know you lost, but you passed that fighting spirit to him. It hasn't been easy, you know. I've seen him cry, and shake, and curl up in a corner and forget to eat and all sorts.

But he's managing, in fact, he's shining. And I've had so many good times with him. We became friends, and now I'm his girlfriend. And his music…it's colourful again. It's beautiful, it's radiant…and some of it, he plays for you, and only you. But sometimes, he plays for me, and only me. And if you hadn't passed through his life that year…none of that would have happened. None of it. I know that if you were living now I wouldn't have even got a look-in romantically. I'd be nursing a case of unrequited love as bad as Tsubaki-san's was before she met Tadashi-kun. But I think I would have still been his friend, and you would have been, too. But you're not. I guess what I'm trying to say is that I am grateful to you. I know you only intended to fulfil your own last wish, and change Kousei's life while you were at it. But you did so much more than that, and I'm really, really glad you did. So, I don't mind that you are still such a big part of his life, and heart. Most other girls would be just jealous, I think, and a little pissed off. Like I said, part of me is jealous, but the rest of me? That isn't, not at all.

So, I won't ever stop him from thinking of you, or talking about you, or coming to visit you here. I'll let him keep the photo you gave him next to the photo of the two of us. I'll let him cry for you when he finds himself feeling sad. But what I won't let him do is forget you. No. I won't do that to you, Kaori. I won't let him forget you. And I won't forget you either, even though I never knew you."

Emi finished her outburst and took a moment to gather her breath. Then, after taking one long look at the gravestone and the pink flowers leaning against it, she walked towards the cemetery gates. Towards Kousei.

…

Soon after they both turned 23, Kousei realised that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with Emi. He wanted to marry her, start a family with her, the works. But as it was a monumental step, he kept quiet about his desires while he worked it all out. First, he searched for the perfect engagement ring. Then, he looked for the perfect song to play to her. Because what better way to ask than through a song, or a meaningful piece? He searched for ages, looking through his old music scores, and looking up others online whenever Emi wasn't looking. When he found the perfect song, it was so obvious; it almost made him groan at his stupidity. After that, he practised it obsessively, fitting it in wherever he could, all the while making sure Emi didn't hear it. He even set it as a piece for a few of his students to play, so that if she did overhear it she wouldn't know.

Eventually, one day in the autumn, when they were both at his house, Kousei asked Emi to listen to a piece he had been learning. As they listened to each other play all the time, Emi questioned Kousei about why he was insistent on her listening, but he just smiled and insisted that she needed to listen to know. So they went to his piano, and with Emi sitting on the stool next to him, he played the piano arrangement of Kreisler's 'Love's Joy'.

The obvious choice. I was brought up on Love's Sorrow, but love isn't all about sadness. It's about the happiness, the life you can build from it. Love has joy in it, too. And you, Emi, you're that joy. I want to have that joy forever. I want to feel this happy for the rest of my life. Do you want that too? Do you want to be happy like this with me? I hope you do.

He poured all his heart into the song, hoping that it reached her, wishing that it would. He barely dared to look at her while he played. But once the final notes had sounded out, he turned to look at her.

Emi looked at Kousei, tilting her head curiously. Her eyes were wide, and her cheeks were pink. She opened her mouth to say something, and then changed her mind, seemingly deciding to keep quiet and consider her options for a moment longer.

He wondered if he had asked something ridiculous of her, if it was stupid to assume that someone like Emi would marry him, no matter how many times they had told each other they loved each other. He opened his mouth to apologise and backtrack when Emi interrupted his thoughts suddenly.

"I want to take you somewhere."

"Sure. Where do you want to go?" he asked. The request was strange, but it was better than outright refusal. He decided to see what would come of it.

"You'll see." Emi smiled like a little girl with a secret as she went to get her coat. Kousei followed suit, putting the ring he had carefully chosen in his pocket, and soon they were outdoors, walking through their hometown. As they got to the bridge over the river, Emi took his hand and dragged him, leading the way. She didn't explain where they were going, and he didn't ask. He just wondered what she was thinking.

"Here." she said. They stopped. Kousei noticed they were at a children's playground. It wasn't the one he had frequented as a child, but he felt like he vaguely recognised it. As the sun was nearly setting, there were no children to be seen, but that didn't seem to concern Emi, who let go of Kousei's hand and walked over to the cage-like climbing frame. She looked up at it, regarding it. After some hesitation, Kousei joined her, and looked up at the climbing frame too. He looked at her, and again wondered what she was thinking.

"I used to play here as a child." she explained, simply.

"Okay..." Kousei was now even more confused a feeling that was exacerbated when she began to climb up.

"Ah...Emi..." He said, ineffectually. Kousei blinked, and could only watch as she went up to the top with very little difficulty. He stared as she seemed to decide whether or not to stand up, and breathed a sigh of relief when she seemed to decide not to, instead sitting right at the very edge and looking up at the sky. There was a faint autumn breeze that tangled bright autumn leaves in her dark hair before flying off again. Combined with the serene, nostalgic expression on her face, it made her look positively enchanting. My autumnal girl, Kousei thought with the same swell of love he felt upon being with her every single day. Emi was truly beautiful, so very different from Kaori Miyazono, but all the better for it. He wouldn't have it any other way.

His reverie was interrupted when he noticed Emi lean back slightly, and then cup her hands around her mouth. As if she was gearing herself up to shout something.

"I'M GOING TO MARRY KOUSEI ARIMA!"

The loudness of her voice made Kousei jump. Emi put her hands down, and turned to look at Kousei. He must have looked even more surprised than he felt, because she started to laugh, and laugh, and laugh. Despite his confusion, he chuckled slightly, and soon that turned into full-blown laughter. They laughed together for a few moments until Emi caught her breath.

"So, Kousei. Was that a good enough answer?" She demanded, regarding him seriously. Kousei smiled up at her.

"That, Emi Igawa, was the best answer ever." He climbed up to join her, and she moved over so he could sit next to her. Then he took the ring out of his pocket, put it on Emi's finger, and together they watched the rest of the sunset from the vantage point of the climbing frame.

End of part 1! What do you think? Please leave some feedback, and hopefully the next part'll be up soon!