AN: The second part of the 3D9C trilogy, which comprises of/will comprise of 3 Doctors, 9 Companions, What Could Possibly Go Wrong?; 4 Doctors, 12, Companions, What Could Possibly Go Wrong? and 5 Time Lords, 13 Companions, Can Anything Else Go Wrong? So, accordingly, this will make absolutely no sense if you haven't read the first part. And if you go back and read the first part now, it probably sucks. But this part is way better, and the last part will be way better as well, so you kind of have to wade through the garbage to get to the good bits.

DAY 75

Who Let the Dogs Out?

Clara

She was thrown from unconsciousness onto the floor and hit her head – hard- on what she thought was the opposite bunk. Then she felt the bus spin, somehow, and then she was thrown in another direction, utterly disorientated, and crashed into something else as the buss fell onto its side and stopped completely. All in the space of about ten seconds.

She lay still for a few moments, before resolving that the best thing to do would be to drag herself to her feet. She hadn't showered due to the abundance of cheese in the water tank, so she was still filthy from the day before and completely disgusting in her own opinion. She was standing upright now inside her bunk, on what had previously been the wall, and there were cushions and sheets from the other beds around her which she had to kick out of the way.

"What was that?" Donna coughed from behind Clara, whose head felt very warm. When she dabbed it, her fingers came back red and wet.

"I don't know, but there's a lot of blood in my hair and that is gonna be hell to wash out…" Clara muttered, wiping her hand on her sleeve. And then somebody was clutching her shoulders.

"Are you okay?" Oswin asked urgently, who'd apparently just materialised out of nowhere in front of her and taken her by complete surprise.

"Doesn't she have a 'personal nanogene cloud' that means she can't get hurt?" Donna asked slightly resentfully. Oswin ignored her.

"She's right," Clara said, "I'm okay, just my head is bleeding. I think it's stopped, actually." Clara swatted Oswin away when she tried to grab her and examine her crown (she wasn't a baby).

"Seriously, what is happening!?" Jenny then demanded. Clara didn't know where the others were, hopefully not dead though.

"…Oswin, were you driving the bus?" Clara asked her seriously.

"I was not!" Oswin said, "I'm not allowed to drive the bus. I know that. Except for two days ago when I was under strict supervision. River was driving, she veered off the road and crashed us because there was an explosion from inside the other bus and it went a bit mental and skidded and she was trying to avoid crashing into it."

"An explosion!?" Clara asked in shock, and then she walked straight out of the wall next to her, followed closely by her sister, spotting Rose almost instantly, who'd clearly teleported out along with River, leaving the others to find the tricky way out through the door, which was facing up towards the sky. It was early morning, clearly, the sky still a little dark and the sun yet to rise.

The other bus was thankfully still upright, but it was completely still in the middle of the road.

"There is too much damn nostalgia here, sweetie," Clara grumbled to her sister, going after the other two to find out what had happened. Prank War aside, all the girls except for Jenny and Donna seemed to be romantically involved with somebody on that bus – and those two were still the daughter and best friend of the Tenth Doctor.

"Yeah, well, I'll be damned if that bus runs now it's slid across the desert like that," Oswin said, "Which means we are stranded. I'm thinking our excursion might be nearing it's end."

"Fina- …Oh…." Clara stopped when the door of the bus opened opposite them, and nothing in all of her time on the TARDIS could prepare her for what came out.

"Are they dogs!?" Oswin exclaimed, and Clara couldn't help but notice the smartest girl in the whole damn universe was cowering behind her. But they were dogs. And there were eight of them, and they all seemed remarkably happy given their current state of being dogs.

"What the hell have they done!?" Rose demanded, as a golden retriever bounded happily over to her, leaving another, identical dog lurking behind looking, well, broody (if that were possible for a dog). It was a husky and a Yorkshire terrier which both padded over towards the Twins, the former going straight for Clara and trying to jump up and possibly lick her face.

"Down!" she ordered, conjuring a telekinetic barrier between herself and the dog, who floated in the air for a moment, before dropping down back to all fours and whimpering a little. The terrier sat obediently as Oswin's feet, and she eyed it suspiciously, until she gasped.

"Oh, shit! The shape alteration inducer and the explosion!" she shouted quite loudly.

"What?" Rose asked.

"They were all pissing about with this device that can cause extreme mutations. Cross-species mutations," Oswin said.

"Are you trying to say that these dogs are the blokes!?" Rose said.

"Well, they… Yes!" Oswin said, "That's what they are… Brilliant! Ugh…" an Alsatian had meandered over to River, so Clara assumed that that must be the Ninth Doctor. And the husky was the Eleventh. And the terrier was Adam Mitchell. So the retrievers were Ten and Tentoo, which left just a pug, a Labrador and a springer spaniel to be identified.

"My husband is a dog!?" Clara exclaimed.

"Yes," Oswin said.

"But… What if he tries to sit on me and lick me!?" Clara said, trying to keep the over-excited husky at bay. She wondered if any of the dogs were entirely aware of what was being said by the persons around them.

"I fail to see how that is any different to what he usually does," Oswin said flatly.

"What if he wants me to play with a bone!?"

"I fail to see how that is any different to what he usually does."

"What if he poos on the floor!?"

"I fail to-"

"Don't," Clara said, and Oswin was quiet, and Clara then thought of another point to bring up about her husband's canine activities, "But what if I have to put him on a lead?"

"I-"

"If you even dare I will hurt you," said Clara coldly, "It's not funny. I think your boyfriend might try and shag your leg in a minute though." They both glanced down and saw that the terrier was giving Oswin a sad look. "Can you fix it?" Clara asked her.

"Yes," said Oswin, "As long as the thing is still on the bus. But I'll need my lab back. Otherwise I don't know if I can properly reprogram it."

"What's going on?" Martha asked then, the remaining four girls finally making their escape from the bus. The pug shot over to her and the Labrador trudged a little moodily towards Amy. Which left just the springer spaniel – so Clara assumed that must be Jack. It was quite interesting to see what forms they'd take if they were dogs.

"The boys have accidentally turned themselves into dogs," Rose said, "You're officially up to speed. And we desperately need the TARDIS back."

The sound which next reached Clara's ears might as well have been the strumming of a harp, or a chorus of angels. The thrumming of the TARDIS filled the air like music, the complete sound of freedom, and she very nearly squealed with excitement at the prospect of showering, and sleeping, and all these other, mundane things. Having enough room to walk around, not having to fight for the bathroom. No stink of cheese. Not to mention the coffee machine.

The blue box appeared in front of them all, girls and dogs alike, and it opened its doors on its own to allow them back.

"I'll go get the SAI," Oswin sighed, walking off. Clara waited behind to be at the end of the group for her sister to come back, her husband waiting loyally next to her.

"Are you naked?" she asked the dog when nobody else was round, "If you turned back into a person now, would you have no clothes on?" The dog just looked at her and wagged his tail, and she sighed, "Of course you can't talk. You're a dog. You haven't ruined your wedding ring with this transformation business?" But he still couldn't answer.

"Clars, are you speaking to the dog?" Oswin returned with the pill-shaped device from yesterday, heading towards the TARDIS with Clara and the dogs trailing behind her, "It's scientifically proven that dogs don't know what you're saying." Clara shut the door behind her sister, and was so glad to be back on the TARDIS, and was just waiting for when she could shower and go back to sleep.

But when they passed through the console room into what she was expecting to be the usually, large, lodge-esque room they used for everything, they came out into an entirely new environment.