AN: I kinda left this story to waste didn't I. I have a reason for that, I wrote the entire story, over seventy thousand words, full of humour and story. Word deleted it. Fucking MICROSOFT CAN SUCK MY PROVERBIAL DICK.

Anyways, I have restarted this story with a new plot line. I need pairings, because I'd like some romance and I am free to any type of pairing, no types of restrictions which also means that I don't appreciate any homophobic or crude comments, as someone who can appreciate a woman as much as a man I do not condone any type of discriminative slurs. Thank you.

Also, any suggestions are free to your own content, don't be afraid to review as I appreciate everything I get and I write purely to entertain you all. I gain nothing out of this but the enjoyment of entertaining those. That also means that I don't own transformers hasbro does, and will remain that way until I say so.

Thank you, and here you go.

Fowler stood behind the railing of the overhang, hands firmly on the rail to keep himself stable because he didn't know, just did not know a thing anymore.

"The hell…" He murmured eyes staring blankly at the display before him.

Said display had happened quite recently. Food, human food.

Bumblebee sat on the floor below the agent, a quite innocent look upon his face as he shoved another gooey handful of peanut butter into his face. Miko had thought it would be funny to at least manage to give the nutty substance to one of them, most of them had immediately backed away either from the thought of food or just that…face she had whenever she was trying to do something mischievous. Bumblebee unfortunately had been innocent enough to take the offer.

At first he had panicked when he struggled to get it out of his mouth and down his gullet by overly trying to remove it from the top of his mouth, repeatedly licking his lips. Now he just sat with a deadpan look on his face, accepting his fate and just eating the entire jar.

Wheeljack and Bulkhead sat idly on the seat behind him, their entire focus enraptured in the tub of ice cream Raf had brought out of the miniature freezer they had at the back of the base. Huge spoons in their grip they forcibly removed the cold desert from its white plastic tub and shovelled it into their open mouths.

A sudden rush for the water machine grabbed his attention. Optimus had once again rushed for the machine only to drink out of it without even bothering to use the cups next to it (though he doubted the prime knew what a cup was)

"For whatever godly being you worship's sake, Prime stop eating the peppers!" The agent grouched at him.

The prime looked up with large innocent blue orbs and through a water and pepper filled mouth mumbled "I can't, they keep challenging me" and with the that he stuck another in his mouth while Magnus and Smokescreen idly stood by with confused looks on their faces. Smokescreen slowly raised his chip packet and ate them as he watched, which in turn caused Magnus to look at him with a 'seriously?' Look.

He finished eating what he had in his mouth "what…you want some?"

Sudden rapid sets of footsteps from below caused Fowler to turn again.

Arcee ran rapidly from the hallway as if her life depended on it screaming in some language that the agent couldn't make heads or tails out of, possibly cybertronian he thought to himself. A wild Miko seemed to be rapidly catching up with a bowl of something in both of her hands and a silver spoon bouncing in the bowl. In one quick move, the teen had tackled the woman to the ground and was desperately trying to put something in the struggling femmes mouth.

"Eat….the fragging….OATMEAL!" Miko screamed as she forced the spoon of oatmeal near Arcee.

"I DON'T WANT YOUR OAT MEAL!" She desperately screamed back.

"EAT IT!" The teen screamed back as she got the best of her and shoved the spoon inside the screaming warriors mouth.

…."hey….this isn't half bad…" There was the sudden sound as something gloopy was thrown on said femme in response.

Arcee pushed Miko off of her, sat up and just stared at her. A rogue piece of oatmeal slid down a piece of hair and landed with a slop onto the floor. Arcee just stared and Miko, being the smart cookie she was stood up and backed away…slowly.

"She can only see things when they move Miko!" Jack called unhelpfully from above next to the agent.

"I get that! I get that reference" the far away voice of Magnus echoed behind him as Fowler watched the young teen bolt down the hallway with a wild arcee careering towards her at a fast pace.

The agent just…couldn't. He straightened his suit and tie, coughed, walked into the elevator and left. William Fowler, just couldn't.

After the mayhem had calmed down Ratchet called all the humans and new humans to his area of the base, he could feel a processor ache coming on from all of the chaos that had happened around, things had been broken (the water dispenser and somehow the oven though they did question as to how ice cream had blown it up, not even Wheeljack knew) oatmeal had been spilled ( Arcee was still covered head to toe in the stuff which had now dried to her like glue) and Optimus had thrown up from eating too many peppers. Oh and they were out of peanut butter.

He turned to them all as he turned off the computers. "Now obviously I cannot care for you all as I must tend to the base and the larger things that you cannot do anymore due to your…condition. So you all must split up to with the children, who ironically will now be your guardians." He said looking at all of them.

"Obviously Bulkhead should go with Miko, Bumblebee with Raf and Arcee with Jack, however the rest of you must decide who to go with." He continued.

"I'll take Raf!" Smokescreen immediately perked up, the thought of spending time with Bulkhead's frustration with him terrified him and he wasn't sure if Arcee wanted to kill him or hurt him.

"If Miko is spending time with Bulkhead then I will keep the sanity at the household of which she abodes in" Magnus piped up, he would think even Optimus had a hard time with the troublesome pair and thought that him being a commanding officer to the wrecker previously, that he might have some leverage over him.

"Well I'll take the Darby household, Raf's team has the green one and I don't exactly think I could live with full force Miko, no offence." Wheeljack huffed with a smirk as he glanced at said teen.

"I too will go live with the Darby residential, if that may be." Optimus said, taking into account the already stable authority of Magnus and Bumblebee.

With all that settled, they finally we're all sent through the groundbridge.

(Please note the author lives in the uk, fans are portable and boilers are our life source. And has no experience with over twenty degrees)

June Darby sat on her red couch in her living room with the fan against her feet, it was an especially hot and sticky night in Jasper Nevada and June had been working all day at the hospital of which their fans had broken down so they all had to resort to having ice packs dotted around the place so that no nurses or doctors fainted from heatstroke. She clasped a coffee in her hands and despite being hot and sticky, she knew that she needed the buzz. She swore she was getting more bags under her eyes each day.

Her house was modest, not enough to be considered a rich woman's house, but decent enough to show that she had some amount of money. To the right there was the living room with red couches, a television that sometimes lost all colour but green, an oak coffee table and a small bookshelf full of fantasy and fiction. Next to that there was the dining table which held six matching chairs to go and in front of that was a small kitchen with blue counters with white tops, a chrome fridge freezer, a matching oven and a coffee machine to the side. In the far left there was the stairs to upstairs and a small door underneath the stairs which held a small storage room full of cobwebs and shoes.

Next to the stairs there was a wall with a door off centre to the right which gave access to the garage where Jack kept his bike and Arcee and June kept her old beat up car.

She sighed, putting her coffee cup to her lips and took in the scent of the coffee, feeling the condensation gather on the tip of her nose before putting the drink to her lips and sipping quietly. All she heard was the clock in the kitchen and outside wildlife.

That was before she heard the distinct sound of the groundbridge in the garage. Odd she thought, Jack usually came home just before curfew as he tried to spend as much time at the base. What was even odder is that she heard more than his and Arcee's voice and she doubted that her garage was a 60s British telephone box. Although she wasn't sure by now after Jack came home with a bag that ratchet had designed which managed to fit a whole floor lamp and plant pot in it and still had room for much more.

Setting her cup on the coffee table in front of her with a soft clunk, she stood up quietly and walked towards the door to her garage when Jack walked through and suspiciously closed the door behind him quickly. He smiled sheepishly and she raised a eyebrow at him.

"Mom!" He chuckled nervously in greeting.

"Jack?" She replied.

"Look, I'm not hiding something I swear! I just have to explain something to you befo-"

CRASH!

June heard the distinct sound of tools falling over and the rumble of the bin lid hitting the ground as well as muffled cybertronian swears. With that, she walked past him and opened the door.

To see an oatmeal drenched woman desperately trying to hold up the tool shelving unit on her own while one man lay with his legs tangled in jacks bike and another man struggled to get out of the bin he had fallen into. When he finally got out he seemed to notice her and froze, so did the others. In an instant she had three very bright blue eyes looking at her with a blank surprise cast over all three of them.

Jack almost fell in behind her trying to explain the situation "look, we can explain!"

She turned around to face him "Explain? As to why you have three strangers currently destroying the garage, eating out of the trash and failing to steal your bike?"

He rubbed the back of his neck subconsciously "well, yes? Look okay it's simple that's Arcee, Optimus and Wheeljack."

June guffawed "I hate to break it to you Jack but those are humans! And those thee are – "

"Um, June…a uh little help?" A female voice that distinctly sounded like Arcee interrupted her, she turned to see the woman looking at her helplessly. The male who had made out with the he trash noticed her predicament and went her help her out the shelves back against the wall. The other man finally snapped out of his private staring contest and stood up and put the bike back against the wall.

June's mouth fell agape "so…that's….and that's really….oh my god."

Jack just nodded to her unfinished questions.

It took June a whole minute that the previously robotic humans were staring at her waiting for some sort of response or command.

"Oh, uh come on in." She gestured towards the door and moved to go though it still confused and slightly in shock. The Autobots turned and followed her with Jack leading the trio inside.

When the Autobots stepped into the house they seemed to pause to take it all in.

"I did not expect it to be this…welcoming" Optimus murmured over his breath and June barely even heard it.

"What did you expect it to be like jack's old job's interior?" She replied with humour lacing her voice.

All three of them replied in sync "yes – pretty much - kinda."

That spoke volumes of their knowledge of human houses.

She then noticed the state they were truly in and her mother mode turned on.

"Optimus, you are absolutely filthy! Go and get all that trash off of you, Jack go find Optimus clothes! Wheeljack too! And Arcee! That oatmeal is making a mess all over my floor, not to mention the fact that you'll never get it out of your clothes or hair! Come with me now!"

And with that things set in motion. Jack called both men to his bedroom to find clothes and to clean trash ridden Optimus who was polite enough to look innocently at her despite not knowing what trash was for a human. After an embarrassing moment of teaching Arcee how to use the shower, in which she turned it all the way down and let out a screech and then turned it all the way up and jumped out of the shower right in front of poor June causing the mother to quickly turn away. Arcee didn't seem bothered by this at all and once figured out how to use the shower never realised the embarrassed flush on the poor nurses face.

June now sat in front of the stove mixing a quick dinner for more than she had originally planned, she heard the loud footsteps of the other people in the house coming down the creaky stairs.

"Jack, could you set the table for me please?" She called, not even to bother to turn around and see if her son was there, hearing her sons footsteps in the pack of others.

"Yeah sure mom." He replied and she heard the opening of drawers and the clinks of cutlery being taken out of their places and putting onto the table.

"What are you doing June?" She heard the soft voice of Optimus ask from behind of her, she turned to look at him as the dinner was almost ready and didn't need any cautious looking after. The three of them just stood awkwardly, unsure as what to do.

She smiled at him "I am making dinner for us, we all need to eat at certain times now."

"What's…'dinner'?" Wheeljack perked up, they all wore the confused innocent look on their faces which almost reminded her of Jack when he was younger and he would constantly ask her things that she never knew the answer to but humoured him anyways.

"Dinner is cooked food that we need to eat to keep our stomachs full. It's like when you all have energon at night except it's cooked food that's cooked in a way that it's a theme. Like today it's just mince meat so I have potatoes, peas and carrots."

"Oh." They all replied and continued to stand awkwardly.

With the dinner ready and the table set she scooped the meat up into five plates and gave them to Jack to take to the Autobots of which he had guided into the seats. Optimus sat next to Arcee and Wheeljack opposite the prime.

Next she poured them all a glass of water, she didn't think they were ready for the extreme sweetness of apple juice. She finally sat down next to Arcee at the head of the table and Jack sat next to Wheeljack. Picking up her fork she shovelled the hot foot onto the fork and put it into her mouth. The Autobots just stared at the two original humans in confusion.

"You uh, pick up the forks like we have and scoop it onto the fork and then eat it." Jack replied to their silent question. Nodding they all repeated the action June and Jack had done previously.

Suddenly they movement on the table became a lot more hurried, Wheeljack immediately took another larger scoop of foot and rammed it into his mouth, repeating the action straight after. Even Optimus and Arcee started earning quicker.

"You guys all right?" June asked with a list of humour in her voice.

"When you've only eaten the same thing for the last vorns, you forget how good other things taster" Arcee replied hurriedly.

The other three only nodded in response and then continued their raid.

After a hurried dinner June figured that they all must have been exhausted and started to plan bed plans.

"Right, it's late everyone I think it's time that we all figure out where everyone is sleeping."

The Autobots looked to her with confused optics once again.

"Time for recharge?" She suggested.

"Ohhh…" they replied in unison, realising what she meant.

Clapping her hands she spoke as she figured out everything in her head "right, Wheeljack can sleep on the couch, Optimus can sleep on the floor in Jack's room and Arcee can sleep in the spare bedroom."

With all sleeping arrangements thought through they started getting ready for bed. June lent arcee some of jacks smaller clothes, her being even smaller than June, and gave some of Jack's newer bed clothes to the two men. With clothes sorted she showed them to the bathroom and showed them how to brush their teeth, she also advised that Optimus and Wheeljack get washed which meant she had to teach them how to wash two more times.

The first to finish was Wheeljack who stepped downstairs as she leant against a counter next to the coffee machine, a new cup in her hand. She had brought a duvet down as well as some pillows for the wrecker.

"So uh, how do I do this…'sleeping' thing anyways doc?" He muttered as he stared Perturbed at the made bed.

"Right, just get in under the, thick blanket and put your head on the white thing. Close your eyes and just either think about something pleasant or clear your mind." She instructed to him.

"Right, so just that okay…seems easy enough." He replied unconfidently as he got underneath the covers.

"Yep, just that. You're doing great, you'll be asleep in no time. Haha, goodnight Wheeljack." And with that she turned the living room lights off and walked upstairs. As she reached the stairs she heard Jack repeating the same thing to Optimus. Figuring that she needn't repeat what she'd said more than two times she went to where Arcee was sleeping.

Walking into her room, she noticed that the femme had already sort of figured it out, laying in bed with a fluffy pillow behind her head, noticing June she looked at her and June barely missed the worried expression she had worn just a second ago.

"You already have this down? I'm impressed." She greeted, voice soft and motherly. She reckoned that the previously two wheeler was not used to new situations and that she wasn't as war hardened as she made out to be.

"Sometimes when Jack and I go out, he falls asleep. At first I thought he'd glitches or worse, but after waking him up suddenly he explained to me what it was he was doing. Now if we go out and he falls asleep I just listen to him and then teleport him back to here where I put him somewhere for you to find him." She replied, voice laced with contentment.

"So why are you worried then?" June asked.

"Humans call them nightmares, we call them memory lapses." She stared ahead at nothing again, June had seen that look too many times on patients that had gone through hell and back. She hated that look, that look had taken Jack's father away.

"You have nightmares? I know, you don't have to tell me, I think I have a good enough idea of what they are about." June went and sat on the edge of the bed where Arcee's feet weren't resting.

"I don't want to recharge and have them" she replied again.

June, coming to a motherly conclusion replied again "look, I'll leave a small light on and if you have one of these nightmares you come to me or Jack. I'm pretty sure Jack knows about them considering by how many times I've found him sleeping next to you in the morning. I know, you're a big grown up soldier, but even soldiers slept with night lights once."

Arcee smiled slightly and June returned it.

"Good night Arcee."

"Goodnight June."

And with that she left the room and went into hers turning all the lights off but the small one she promised to keep on. Slowly she shut the door to her bedroom behind her.

Goodnight indeed….