Title: Be Your Everything

Rating: T with potential for M (Will warn if it gets to that)

Disclaimer: I don't own anything in relation to Pretty Little Liars or in relation to any pop culture references that are made in this chapter.

Summary: It's been eight years since their high school graduation, and in eight years a lot has changed. A wedding brings everyone back together, but just how much have these changes affected everyone's lives? Sequel to Better With You. A Spemily focused story with mentions of Aria, Hanna, and Alison friendships.

A/N – Hello wonderful people of the internet, and welcome to my first update of 2017! I'm back with a new chapter for you all, and in hopes of starting the year off right, it's 100%, full on, fluffy holiday goodness. But, as per usual, before we get to that I would like to take some time to thank all of you incredible people for supporting me by reading and reviewing my work. It means everything to have all of your encouragement, and I appreciate it so, so much. So, to everyone who has recently followed/favourited either my work, or myself, I both welcome you and thank you! And, to all of my wonderful reviewers, thank you for constantly giving me your words of encouragement, and for pushing me to keep writing. You guys never fail to make me feel valued through my work, and I really appreciate it.

Breyanaxo – Aw, I'm glad I managed to make your day! And also, though I am sorry that chapter brought you to tears, I'm so happy that that scene hit you emotionally, because it honestly was a scene that I'd been wanting to write for the longest time, so I'm happy it turned out in a way that evoked such a reaction from you. In regards to Nat, she's kind of exactly how you put it; you don't expect much from her, but every once in a while she drops a knowledge bomb that is just light's out. I'm glad you enjoy her place in the story though, because I definitely can't wait to expand on her character. I hope the rest of your exams went well, and that you pulled out exceptional results. Also, good luck with the start of your new semester! I know how much of a pain in the ass that can be, haha. Oh, and Aria and Ezra make a reappearance next update ;p but yes, they tend to come in and out of fanfiction limbo.

GlacialFreight - Happy to hear that you enjoyed it! The Christmas/New Years updates will bring a bit of a push in the plot for sure, even though it might not completely seem so at first. As for Jason, well I can't entirely blame you for not caring for him, haha. It's why I try to keep his interaction to a minimal. But yes, as you said, he is still an integral part of the story.

xXhiddenbeautyXP – Well, you're definitely not wrong in them having a bit of a setback, but all of that will be addressed in this update! The good thing about the girls having a few days of distance between them is that they have the chance to re-evaluate their opinions, and I think that with your thoughts on the matter, you'll be pleasantly surprised with this next update (:

SethuEmaya – No need for apologies! I'm happy to hear that you were able to spend time with your family during the holidays. Now, you're definitely not wrong about Spencer being the most stubborn person in the world, haha. But the good thing is that, if there's anyone who is able to break down that wall of stubbornness, it's Emily Fields herself! And you can tell that slowly but surely, Emily is breaking down those walls that Spencer has so adamantly built.

Dragoncila – Thank you for re-reading, I'm glad you still enjoy it!

Guest – Haha, well that's one way to put it! I definitely think that Spencer and Emily are both entitled to the way they feel on the situation, but yes, Spencer does need to recognize that Emily was willing, and will always be willing to spend the rest of her life with her. Hopefully that will be enough to get her to consider letting her guard down.

SA – Aw that's so sweet, haha thank you so much! I'm glad you're always looking forward to the updates, because I definitely always look forward to your reviews.

Rthansen – You haven't gotten his side of the story yet, but that will definitely come as the dialogue between him and Spencer opens up in the future. So unfortunately, it won't be for a little while, but it will come eventually! I think things are definitely different in Emily's case compared to his though, because they were broken up so really, she has no right to hold a grudge over the actual act of sleeping with him. In regards to what Emily says to her during their conversation, that will be addressed in this chapter again, so don't worry! Emily isn't just completely oblivious to Spencer's feelings, haha. And I'm happy to hear you want more Nat, because she will definitely be a bigger part of the story in the future as I dive into her character a little more. Hope the rest of your exams went well and that you had a great holiday break!

Beautifuldreamerr – Finally some sympathy for Jason, the poor guy! Haha, I feel like you're the only one. But that's okay! Because he really is a good guy; his actions are just a little questionable, is all. You're not wrong in that he really just wants for Spencer to hear him out. But unfortunately, there's a time and place for that and it isn't quite yet. So glad to hear that Natalie has grown on you in this last little bit; initially I bounced back and forth with where I wanted to take her character, and I knew it was risky having her being such an integral part of the story, but I'm happy she's being well received. And as for Emily and Spencer, I know they're absolutely exhausting at this point with their will they, won't they back and forth, but I assure you, they will be pulling their heads out of their asses in due time (: I had a wonderful new year by the way, and I hope you did as well!

Carla – A new reviewer! First and foremost, thank you for putting time into reading both fics in such a quick amount of time, haha! They're definitely high in word count too, so like... Wow, haha well done. Though it won't be in this update, the next one is gonna have some interaction between the entire gang so you definitely have that to look forward to. Also, can I just say, I think it's awesome that you remember the little details that I've thrown in here and there because you're right! Every single one of those things will come into play in the future (I'm a firm believer in Chekhov's gun, haha so well done on noticing that). Thank you so much for taking the time to read my work and review it. And I hope you enjoy this next update!

Alright folks, this update is, as I've said before, 100% fluffy goodness. The conversation from the previous chapter will be brought up once again as well, and hopefully its resolution is a little bit more satisfying for you guys this time. In general I hope that you all enjoy it, because honestly I had a bit of trouble getting it the exact way that I wanted it to turn out lol. So fingers crossed that it ended up half decent regardless. And whether it did or didn't, well feel free to let me know (also feel free to let me know about any errors, because I totally didn't edit). Oh! And there is gonna be a flashback in this update, which will be in italics, as well as a song mention. If you haven't heard Lego House by Ed Sheeran, I recommend you have a listen. Now, without further ado…!

Chapter 12 (Part One) - I Will Love You Better Now

"Alright, let's see… Potatoes?"

"Check."

"Cranberry sauce?"

"Check."

"Stuffing?"

"Check."

Letting out a sigh, Emily turned away from the grocery shelf that was in front of her, now facing Spencer as she ran her fingers through her hair.

"Okay, I think that's it, we're good to go. Now let's get out of this godforsaken place and go home," she declared with a tight lipped smile, to which Spencer nodded in agreement and pushed their shopping cart toward the checkout area, investigating the lengths of each of them before finally settling on one.

Spencer's eyes shifted over to Emily whose eyes remained on the moving line in front of them, and she could tell that her girlfriend's thoughts were a mile away. Slipping her hand into her girlfriend's, Spencer allowed her thumb to trace over Emily's smooth skin, the action enough to pull Emily from her thoughts, her gaze now shifting to Spencer. And once she'd successfully captured her attention, Spencer gave the girl's arm an ever so slight tug and leaned in, her soft lips grazing over Emily's for a brief moment before pulling away.

"I'm sorry we got stuck in the city for Christmas, baby. I know how much you were looking forward to going to Rosewood," Spencer told her, and Emily leaned into her girlfriend as she let out a sigh, Spencer easily taking the cue and wrapping her arms around Emily.

"It's okay, S, it's not your fault. I mean, how could you have predicted a blizzard so big they shut down all major highways?"

"I know, but still. If I hadn't have stayed so late at the office finishing up all of that paperwork filing, we could have driven out last night like we were supposed to," Spencer responded with a sigh. She pulled away from Emily who looked up at her, and it was obvious there was no bitterness or upset from Emily, but it didn't stop Spencer from feeling terrible; all Emily had been talking about for weeks was how excited she had been to be done with finals so that they could start their holiday together.

"Babe seriously, it's okay. We both knew the kind of territory we'd be getting into with you taking that internship, especially only in your first year of university. We expected you would be heaps busier than before, but it's okay, S," Emily reassured her girlfriend, once again leaning forward and resting her head against Spencer's chest as she let out a sigh.

Among the first few months of university, Spencer had managed to land herself an extraordinary internship with one of the best law firms in the state, which meant several things. It meant that although she was only in her undergraduate program, Spencer had already taken several steps to get ahead of her peers. It also meant that, given her performance, she would have a huge foot in the door with whatever future law endeavors she sought to conquer. And in turn, it also meant that Spencer would give everything she possibly had to that internship to make sure she made a lasting impression on any and every employee that she encountered during her time with the firm. Which also meant that she would spend an innate amount of time perfecting every piece of work that she'd submit for said employees.

"I'm so proud of you, my love," she continued, mumbling against her chest. "And I will never, ever hold it against you for the bumps in the road that come with you chasing your goals. Because that's the other kind of territory that comes with loving someone; your dreams become my dreams."

In the past month that she'd been interning for them, Spencer's schedule had gotten far busier than both her and Emily had anticipated, but the couple took things in stride. Whenever possible, Spencer made extra time for her girlfriend, whether that meant cooking her dinner, cleaning the house, coming to her swim meets, or surprising her with flowers and a date night. And in turn, Emily accepted the fact that more often than not, she would only see her girlfriend for an hour before she had to go to sleep, and for another twenty minutes in the time it took for her to get ready for class in the morning – provided Spencer hadn't already gotten out of bed for her morning run.

But Emily didn't mind. She was happy to sacrifice the extra time with her girlfriend if it meant that Spencer was taking steps closer to doing what she loved for the rest of her life. And in this particular situation, for Emily it wouldn't have made a difference whether they drove back yesterday evening or during the day of Christmas Eve, as long as it meant she would get to see her family. However, when an unpredicted winter storm hit overnight, Spencer and Emily were left with no other option than to stay in the city, and have Christmas alone.

When the highways had been declared too unsafe to drive on, Spencer's heart broke knowing that all of Emily's holiday wishes had completely gone down the drain largely in part due to her. And regardless of how many times Emily had assured her that it was okay, it didn't stop Spencer from feeling racked with guilt. In that moment, she'd promised herself to do everything in her power to make sure that Emily's Christmas, while not how it was initially planned, would be the best they could possibly have.

"I just… I love you so much, Em, and I always want to do anything in my power to make you happy – just like you do for me," Spencer explained, her tone soft as she lightly ran her hands up and down Emily's back, the motion soothing to the girl who found herself relaxing more and more in Spencer's arms. "I know that all you wanted for Christmas was to be home, babe. And I'm sorry that I couldn't make it happen for you."

Shaking her head ever so slightly in disagreement, Emily gave Spencer a half smile before reaching up and wrapping an arm around the brunette's neck, leaning up ever so slightly in order to attach her lips to her girlfriend's. They warmly embraced for a few moments, and Spencer could tell that this was a kiss of reassurance. A kiss to tell her that it was okay. A kiss to tell her that she didn't blame her, or hold any resentment towards the brunette. A kiss to tell her that contrary to every thought running through Spencer's mind, Emily was happy. And when they pulled away, even though she didn't need to, Emily gently placed her palm over Spencer's cheek, caressing it with her thumb as she spoke.

"I love you, Spence. And even though I was looking forward to getting to see our parents, it's okay that we didn't, because at the end of the day, whether we're in New York, or Rosewood, or halfway across the world, as long as I'm with you, I'm happy, babe. My home is whenever I'm with you." Leaning in once more, Emily captured Spencer's lips in a soft kiss, lingering once more in order to emphasize her love. And once they pulled away from one another, she looked up at her girlfriend with a bright smile as she said, "Now, what do you say we go home and cook us a feast?"

Spencer smiled to herself, wondering how it was she managed to be lucky enough to have such an incredible girlfriend in Emily Fields. She didn't know how the girl did it, but every single day she found herself more and more grateful for the life they had built together. And nothing made her more excited than to look forward to the future they would continue to form.

"Let's do it. But maybe I can cook and you can clean; remember, we want to be able to actually eat Christmas dinner," Spencer playfully responded with a sly smirk that she had expected would earn her a glare and a nudge from her girlfriend. What she wasn't expecting, however, was for Emily to lean into her, her lips grazing Spencer's earlobe ever so slightly as she dropped her voice to a low, sultry whisper.

"You know, you might want to try and play your cards right. I'm sure Christmas dinner isn't the only thing you'll want to be eating later."

And then, as if she hadn't said a word at all, Emily redirected her attention to where the checkout line was now moving, pushing the cart forward and leaving an absolutely stunned Spencer Hastings frozen in place, mind reeling over what was just said. It took a few moments before Spencer snapped out of her daze, and as she let out an audible gulp, Spencer shook her head before turning around and following behind her lover. Emily Fields would undoubtedly be the death of her, and quite frankly, she wasn't even remotely complaining.

"Holy am I ever stuffed." Emily declared, plopping her body down on the couch beside Spencer who had already been seated in the living room, a glass of whiskey in one hand and her eyes in front of the television that played quietly, its sound just barely drowning out the crackling of the still burning fireplace below it. Emily shook her head at the fact that Spencer seemed to yet again be watching Home Alone, which seemed to play on repeat throughout the holiday season. Instead of scolding her, however, the moment Spencer spared a glance at her girlfriend, Emily took the opportunity to give the girl a light peck on her lips as she cuddled into Spencer's free arm. "Dinner was incredible, babe. Thank you so much again for cooking."

"Of course, love. I'm just glad I could do Christmas dinner justice for you on such short notice. I know it doesn't hold a candle to your mom's cooking but—"

"Hey, don't do that," Emily interrupted, gently lifting her hand to Spencer's face as the two locked eyes, the raven-haired girl tracing her fingers over Spencer's soft features. "I can tell you're still beating yourself up over us not making it to Rosewood for Christmas, but honestly? I'm kind of glad that we didn't now."

"Em—"

"No, babe I'm serious. With less than a day's notice, you and I totally just rocked our first Christmas dinner together, adult style," Emily pointed out, her words eliciting a light bout of laughter from Spencer. She smiled at her lover, her heart skipping ever so slightly at the melodic sound of Spencer's playful laughter before she continued speaking. "Seriously though, I enjoyed every second of our day together. The grocery shopping, watching you work your way around the kitchen, you finding a way to get me to help you any way that I could so that I didn't feel like you were doing all the work, our entire dinner together…" Her words trailed for a brief second, and her eyes shifted away from Spencer's gaze, looking downward at their now interlocked fingers before she looked up once more. "I guess I didn't really realize it until now, but… We're not kids in high school anymore, you know? We're adults and we're in university, and we've started a real life together… And, I just… It's times like these that kind of get me really excited and looking forward to the future when we're married and have kids, and we get to do this kind of thing with a house full of our friends and family. Because I think that we'll do so well together; we have such an incredible future to look forward to together, and I can't wait."

In that moment, Spencer found herself two things: speechless, and in love. If she hadn't already known it before, she knew it now. There was nothing in the world that she was more excited for, than spending the rest of her life with Emily Fields. Though they had only been together for a little over a year now, to Spencer it felt like they'd been together forever. But it had been the best forever she'd ever experienced in her life, and thus far it was only getting better and better. To that day, Emily still managed to find ways to give Spencer butterflies, and keep her at a loss for words, and it was moments like the one they were currently having that proved that she would be absolutely and perfectly content in having Emily take her breath away every single day for the rest of her life.

"Em… Can I play something for you?" Spencer questioned, finally breaking the lull of silence that had fallen over the two of them, and her words brought a warm smile to Emily's face.

If there was one thing that Emily knew, it was the value that Spencer held to music as a form of communication. And it was one of the things that she loved most about her girlfriend. Because for such an eloquent and well-spoken person, there were times that Emily knew she found her girlfriend speechless. But there was something incredible about Spencer's ability to communicate her every thought and feeling through lyric; where words failed her, music would always speak. And Emily absolutely loved it.

"Always."

After nodding ever so slightly at the girl, Emily watched as Spencer set down her glass of whiskey, excusing herself for a moment in order to get her guitar. Emily's eyes remained stagnant on Spencer, watching the brunette quietly move from the room, and once the girl had exited she leaned back into her seat, letting out a content sigh. With the busyness of school, work, and life in general, it wasn't often that Emily could afford herself the time to appreciate the incredible life that she and Spencer had built for themselves over the years. As of late, however, Emily found it to be all that consumed her thoughts.

Though they were still incredibly young, Emily couldn't imagine a life without Spencer in it; frankly, she didn't want to. And the more they grew together as a unit, the more she found herself itching to solidify the future of their relationship with a formal proposal. She wanted to marry Spencer Hastings; there was no doubt in her mind about it. And at this point in time, it wasn't a matter of if, but when. It was an internal battle that she'd lately been having with herself, and although she'd yet to bring it up to any of her friends and family, a part of her knew she needed to wait. She would wait, and she would enjoy being young and in love with her incredible girlfriend, because if there was one thing she was certain of, it was her inevitable happily ever after with the love of her life.

The soft sound of a guitar strumming pulled her from her thoughts, and it was only then that she realized Spencer had found her way back into the living room, seated directly beside her once again. Spencer looked up at her, shooting the girl a charming half smile, and Emily leaned her head against her girlfriend as the soft mix of guitar and her girlfriend's soothing voice enveloped her completely.

This was home.

END OF FLASHBACK

On the Eve of Christmas, Emily never seemed to find herself relaxing like most people would. Rather, she'd been in the kitchen since she'd awoken that morning, hard at work in preparation for the Christmas Eve dinner that had become tradition in their household over the past five years. As was the norm, Hanna was in and out of the kitchen, trying her best to help as much as she could while simultaneously trying to finish up last minute paperwork for her business. But Emily didn't mind in the least bit; whether she was alone in the kitchen or maneuvering her way around it with Hanna, she never failed to find herself at peace when cooking Christmas dinner.

The two worked both cohesively and synchronously, with Emily preparing the turkey while Hanna worked on peeling and cutting the potatoes. Over the years, the girls seemed to develop and perfect a system of preparation that allowed things to go as smoothly as possible, and in that time both of them found Christmas dinner prep to be the perfect time for them to catch up on one another's lives in the midst of the chaos that was the holiday season.

"So, how have things been with you and Mike as of late?" Emily questioned as she basted the turkey in front of her.

"They've been… Really good, actually," Hanna responded with a soft grin. Letting go of the colander of vegetables that she'd been holding onto, Hanna turned to Emily, and upon making eye contact her soft grin only grew as she continued. "He's just, he's so different than what I thought he'd be, you know? I mean… He spends all his time with Noel Kahn – granted, that's due to his line of work – but still. I just assumed they would be one in the same, but…" She paused, letting out a sigh of contentment as she thought back to the past month she'd spent with the younger boy. "He's so much more than that, you know? He's sweet, and considerate, and he's been so patient and understanding with me… I haven't felt this way about someone in a really long time, Em," she concluded with a shrug. "And I guess it's just… Really, really nice to feel this way about someone again."

Emily couldn't help the smile that came over her face as Hanna answered the question; the last thing Emily had ever expected was for Hanna to start dating their best friend's younger sibling, but somehow, the two just worked together. She had seen the change in Hanna's overall demeanor since having started to let the younger Montgomery into her life, and it was nothing if not fulfilling. After everything she knew Hanna had been through, nothing made Emily happier than the blonde finally finding someone she could put her trust in again.

"I'm really happy for you, Han. And I'm really proud of you; I know how hard its been to let people into your life after Caleb, and it's really great to see you moving forward again," Emily told her best friend, the two exchanging smiles of appreciation with one another. "So, while we're on the topic," the brunette continued, to which Hanna quirked an eyebrow. "Not that I'm not happy to have you here, but… How come you're not spending Christmas Eve with the Montgomery's?"

"He asked me to, but…" Hanna let her words trail for a second as she ran her fingers through her hair, trying to find the words to describe her feelings. "I don't know, I guess because we aren't official yet, I didn't want to put that kind of pressure on our relationship so soon."

"But… Aria's family knows you. They already love you," Emily pointed out, not fully understanding Hanna's logic behind her reasoning.

"I know that, but its different now," Hanna responded with a sigh. "It's like when you and Spencer first started dating in high school, and you were nervous about how Peter and Veronica would look at you," she reminded Emily, and the comparison easily made the brunette comprehend the situation more. "To Byron and Ella, I've always just been Aria's best friend, not somebody who's going to be dating their youngest kid. I guess I just prefer the more old school method of Mike and I building our relationship before we do the whole... Reintroduction to his parents thing, you know?"

"Yeah, I definitely get it," Emily agreed with a nod.

"Good," Hanna affirmed, and as a silence fell over the two, she turned her gaze back to the vegetables she'd previously been working on. "Sooo," the blonde drawled out. "Are we going to discuss your non-old school relationship with Spencer?"

The question caused Emily to let out a light scoff as she once again shifted her attention to Hanna, giving the girl a pointed look to which the blonde simply quirked an eyebrow.

"For the millionth time Hanna, Spencer and I are not in a relationship," Emily reiterated, beginning to feel like a broken record with the amount of times she'd stated those exact words as of late. Her response quickly elicited an eye roll from the blonde who had once again dropped hold of the food that she'd been working on to turn her attention back to Emily.

"That's ridiculous."

"Maybe so, but that doesn't make it any less true," Emily spoke, her tone seeming to damper upon admittance of the fact. "I mean… She hasn't even talked to me for the past four days. Not that I deserve it, anyways…" Her words trailed as her mind reflected back onto her last encounter with Spencer, and the recollection of the conversation caused her to shake her head. "God, the more that I think about it, I was such an ass about it. How could I have been so selfish? I mean, I just… I completely didn't even take Spencer's feelings into account in this entire situation. What kind of person does that?!"

"Em…"

"I just wish I could apologize… She deserves that much, at least," Emily continued, and Hanna found herself at a loss for words. She knew exactly what had gone down between her two friends, and although she'd always been protective of Emily and Xaviera, even she could understand the difficulty that Spencer was having. However, Hanna made no effort to intervene; for once, she acknowledged the fact that Emily needed to figure things out for herself.

"I know you probably feel terrible right now," Hanna started, and Emily gave her a sad smile with a light nod. "But you know what I realized is kind of the best thing about yours and Spencer's relationship?"

"What's that?"

"The best thing about your relationship is that the one thing you can count on is that it's never too late for you guys," Hanna reminded her, and as if on cue, the doorbell sounded throughout the household, causing Emily to quirk a curious eyebrow. As far as Emily was aware, the two weren't expecting any guests for Christmas Eve. And as Hanna gave her a smile, encouraging her to answer the door, Emily's inquisitiveness only heightened.

Though Emily couldn't quite comprehend why, as she reached the door the feeling of light butterflies seemed to dwell within her stomach. And the moment she opened the door, the sight in front of her turned the light fluttering into an eruption of nerves and excitement, her heart skipping a beat as a smile quickly crept onto her face. She couldn't help the wave of emotions that overcame her upon seeing Spencer in front of her, hands full with what looked like a bag containing several gifts in one hand, and a bouquet of flowers in the other. The two locked eyes, and for a brief moment it was as though time stopped, their breaths caught in their throat at the sight of one another.

And then, after several moments of deafening silence, Spencer nervously stepped forward, holding up the vibrant bouquet to Emily before saying,

"Any chance you have some extra room at the dinner table today?"

"Spencer," was all Emily seemed to be able to breathe out before closing the distance between the two of them, engulfing the taller brunette in her arms without so much as another word. "Merry Christmas, S," she spoke, her tone soft as she found purchase in the feeling of having Spencer in her arms once again.

"Merry Christmas, Em," Spencer whispered out in response as she lightly dropped the bag of gifts in her hand in order to return the girl's embrace. She squeezed Emily as tightly as she possibly could, eyes closing as she gave herself a moment to bury her face in the shorter girl's hair, inhaling the scent that she'd committed to memory time and time again. They held the embrace for an extended period of time, and it was as though both girls were trying to reacquaint themselves with one another's touch. But neither girl seemed to mind, and after a few moments Spencer pulled away, giving the girl a half smile. "Can we talk?"

"Of course," Emily agreed, stepping aside so as to create a clear path for the brunette. "Come on in."

"Thank you," Spencer responded, taking hold of the bag that she'd previously set down and clearing the doorway so that the two were now standing in the foyer of the house. "These," she continued, holding up the flowers that had remained in her hand throughout their entire exchange. "Are for you."

"Daffodils," Emily whispered out, accepting the flowers while smiling to herself as she thought back to the several times Spencer had gotten her apology flowers in the past. This time, however, she couldn't help but feel a level of confusion as well as apprehension at the gesture. In her eyes, Spencer had absolutely nothing for which needed apologizing, and her mind quickly began to fill with thoughts of what could have possibly occurred between their last conversation and that exact moment in time to result in an apology from the brunette. Before she had the opportunity to acknowledge the fact, however, Spencer's words broke her train of thought.

"I'm sorry for not calling, Em. I know you hate it when I go AWOL on you, and I'm really sorry if my doing that made you worry at all," Spencer told her, and upon giving her reasoning, Emily found herself letting out a light sigh of relief.

"Spence…"

"Look, I know we talked about how we need to communicate instead of just ignoring our problems, and…" Spencer paused, letting out a shaky breath as she ran her free hand through her hair. "I'm trying, Em. I really am. I just… This is all so new to me; for the past five years, I've been so used to just dealing with things by myself. And I'm sorry for shutting you out because of that. It's not fair to you."

"No, Spencer…" Emily began, only briefly pausing to let out a light sigh. "That's not entirely true." Spencer's eyebrow perched in confusion, causing Emily to step forward and grab hold of the girl's hand, entangling them together. "Let's talk somewhere a little more private."

Wordlessly nodding at Emily's request, Spencer allowed herself to be led by the girl down the hallway of the house, and she could quickly tell the destination of which she was being taken. Upon arriving at the study room of the house, Emily allowed Spencer to enter in front of her, and once the two of them were inside she shut the door behind her, giving them a full space of privacy. They sat on the chestnut leather couch in the corner of the room, and once situated, Emily turned to Spencer who was patiently and attentively waiting for an explanation from the girl in front of her.

"I owe you an apology, S. A big one, at that," Emily finally let out, but her words only seemed to confuse Spencer even more, the taller girl's face scrunching in puzzlement.

"Apology?" Spencer sputtered out, to which Emily gave her a slight nod. "An apology for what?"

"Spence, you have been… Beyond incredible to me throughout everything that's happened these past few months. Seriously, you've been so selfless, and understanding, and caring, and forgiving…" Emily paused, and her eyes shifted downward for a brief second while letting out a light exhale before continuing. "You've been everything that I could have ever asked for to me, and even more than that to Xavi, and I cannot thank you enough for everything that you've done for the two of us," she admitted, looking back up in order to lock eyes with Spencer whose gaze remained completely trained on her the entire time. "What I've started to realize these past few days though, is that throughout all this time, I've been so blind to you and your feelings. And for that, I owe you a huge apology."

"I'm sorry if I ever made you feel like what you feel about our entire situation is invalid, because it's not. I know I told you that Xavi always comes first for me, and I know that you've never had a problem with that. But," she paused once more, this time to reach out and place her hand on Spencer's leg before speaking once more. "I need you to know that on my list of priorities, you're right up there with her. And if I ever, ever made you feel like I gave you an ultimatum between your feelings, and us, I'm so sorry. I want you to always be able to come to me and tell me how you feel without fear of losing me or losing what we've been building and fighting for, for so long now. Because I care about you so much, and I never want there to be a point in time where you have to second guess that."

"Hey, I've never second guessed your feelings, Em," Spencer reassured the girl, taking that moment to grab hold of Emily's hand and intertwine their fingers together. "And I know that I don't talk about my feelings a whole lot, but I hope you know that even though we haven't 100% figured things out between us, I care about you a lot too," she continued, her thumb softly caressing the back of Emily's hand. "The things that I do, both for you and because of you, are because I want to make you happy. Because making you happy makes me happy. So please, don't ever think that you're pressuring me into doing anything, okay?"

Spencer shifted in her seat so that the two were closer, while simultaneously bringing her free hand up to Emily's face and gently tracing the girl's soft features. She felt Emily relax in her hold, a smile coming across her face as the girl nuzzled her cheek ever so slightly against Spencer's palm, and the action in turn caused Spencer to smile as well.

"You mean so much to me, Em. And, I know that things have gotten really, really complicated as of late, but… I just hope you know that I would rather do complicated with you than simple with anyone else in the world."

And without so much as another word, Emily leaned in, feeling the ever so slight hitch in Spencer's breath as she captured the girl's lips with her own. In that moment, it was as though every single one of their problems drifted away, and with a weight lifted from the shoulders of their budding relationship, the two girls took the time to indulge in one another. Emily revelled in the feeling of Spencer's soft lips pressed against her own, her heart racing at the slow movements of the girl shifting, causing them to ever so slightly but gradually change the angle of their kiss. Simultaneously, Spencer's hand moved from Emily's cheek, sliding to the back of her neck – an action which caused Emily to let out a light groan of approval as she leaned into the kiss even more, her hands now resting on Spencer's thighs in order to counter the lightheadedness that inevitably seemed to come from the overwhelming touch of Spencer's mouth against her own.

It was almost as though time stood still for the two girls, and for that very, very brief amount of time they forgot about everything and everyone around them, only focusing on the taste, touch, and feel of one another. But much like all other good things, their moment would inevitably come to an end; that ending came the second the door to the study suddenly opened and a loud voice broke through the two girls' spell of bliss.

"Ninang, I found them! And they're kissing, again!"

Xaviera's sudden interruption elicited a bout of laughter from both Emily and Spencer, and the girls were quick to break apart from their embrace. Spencer leaned forward, naturally causing her to press her forehead against Emily's while the shorter girl shook her head over so slightly at her daughter's words.

"Someone's up from her nap," Emily muttered out in a less than impressed tone, and Spencer's laughter only increased, easily recognizing the slight frustration that came with the girl's words. Knowing that their private moment was now over, Spencer pulled away from Emily completely, her attention shifting to Xaviera who stood in the doorway, hands on her hips and a smirk on her face that made it obvious that the little girl was entirely pleased with her own entrance.

"Hey troublemaker," Spencer greeted Xaviera who scrunched her face up ever so slightly at the nickname. Without warning, the little girl launched herself forward, running towards Spencer and Emily, and as soon as she reached the sofa that the two were still sat on, Xaviera jumped into Spencer's now waiting arms. It caused Spencer to let out a giggle, and a smile broke out across her face as she wrapped Xaviera in a hug before saying, "Merry Christmas, Xav."

"Merry Christmas, tia," the little girl responded while nuzzling herself deeper into Spencer's arms.

"Well now that this one is up, I should probably go and continue helping Hanna with dinner. But first," Emily declared as she stood up from her seat beside Spencer, taking hold of the daffodils that had sat on the opposite side of her before turning back to where the two were still sat. "I'm going to go put these in water. Feel free to keep my daughter entertained for the next little while."

"You mean I get to hang out with tia today?!" Xaviera questioned, her expression brightening instantly as her eyebrows shot up in excitement. She turned to look at Spencer, and the older girl simply shrugged and gave her a smile while nodding, but that was enough for Xaviera to let out a yelp of enthusiasm. "This is gonna be the best Christmas, ever!"

"Count on it," Spencer affirmed, and without warning she grabbed hold of Xaviera, lifting the little girl over her shoulder as she stood from the couch, the action causing Xaviera to squeal loudly, followed by a series of giggles. "Alright, goober. Let's go!"

Spencer led the two of them out of the study, and Emily trailed behind them, laughing as she kept her eyes on the girls for a few moments before finally breaking away from them to go back into the kitchen. As she reentered the room, her eyes quickly found Hanna whose back was facing her, the blonde seemingly channeling all of her focus on the bowl of potatoes that she was rigorously mashing together. She smiled at the girl, and without a single word she strode over to where Hanna stood, silently coming up behind her and then wrapping her free arm around her best friend.

"I don't know what it is you did exactly, but thank you," Emily whispered, and she could feel Hanna relax in her arms, the blonde leaning back against Emily while the taller girl rested her chin against Hanna's shoulder, which allowed the two girls to briefly appreciate each other's presence. They remained this way for a few moments, until finally Hanna turned her head ever so slightly, placing a soft peck against the side of Emily's head.

"Anytime, Em. Anytime."

After dinner, all four girls found themselves sitting together in the living room, spending quality time together while simultaneously allowing their food to digest. Xaviera sat on the floor in front of the living room table, and across from her was Spencer whose back leaned against the couch that both Emily and Hanna were currently occupying.

"What about… This move?"

"Well, that's definitely a good move. However, in chess, you always want to be thinking ahead. If you move your piece there, then yes, you'll be able to pick off one of my pawns, but since my knights currently control the centre, you're now making a move that, in about... three moves, will completely expose your king."

Both Xaviera and Spencer had been engaging themselves in a game of chess – the set having been a gift that Spencer bought for the little girl, among other things. And though the match didn't actually pose much difficultly to Spencer, as it was more a game of Spencer playing strategically, while Xaviera moved whichever pieces she saw fit based on the rules the older girl would give her, she loved that Xaviera was actively making an effort to learn the game, the little girl consistently asking Spencer to explain why certain moves would either benefit or hinder her.

"Right. Okay, hm," Xaviera responded, placing her chess piece back on the board and then examining it again. She pondered it for a few moments and then picked up another chess piece; once moved, she peeked a glance over to Spencer whose mouth twitched upward as though biting back an impressed smirk. Xaviera could tell that she'd made the right choice that time.

Meanwhile, Emily and Hanna were enjoying spending time talking to one another about anything and everything that came to mind, the two happy to have uninterrupted best friend time as they had not been able to do so with the hectic pace that the holiday season had brought upon them. Though Emily's attention remained focused on Hanna in their conversation with one another, somehow her hand still found its place intertwined in Spencer's long brown locks. She trailed her nails along Spencer's scalp in a gesture that could easily be deemed as intimate in every sense of the word. But it was natural for the two girls; regardless of situation, they always craved it.

"Hey Spence," Hanna called out to the brunette as Emily suddenly stood from her seat on the couch, excusing herself from the room. Spencer's body swivelled in the blonde's direction, and she gave Hanna a quirked brow, silently letting the girl know that she had her attention. "How come Natalie didn't come with you today?"

"Oh, she, uhm… We've actually never spent a Christmas Eve together," Spencer began, her surprising words causing Hanna to furrow her eyebrows in confusion. "She's kind of always had trouble around this time of year; it was her family's favourite holiday when her parents were still alive," she continued to explain, and Hanna's expression seemed to drop as she recalled the brief synopsis Emily had previously given her on Natalie's family situation. "Usually she'll take a day to herself to drive out to their gravesite and visit, and then she'll kind of just stay home and be by herself for a while; after that, we either spend the day at my house or drive out to Rosewood. I always offer to spend it with her, but it's become sort of a ritual that she goes through every year, so I try not to disturb it," Spencer told Hanna, and the blonde simply nodded in acknowledgement, now completely understanding. "I asked if she wanted to come today, but she wasn't really up for it, so I let her take Simba for the day; that way she's not completely alone."

"It sucks that she seems to struggle so hard around this time of year; good on you, though, for trying to be there for her as much as possible," Hanna spoke, and the two exchanged smiles with one another. Knowing that the two hadn't exactly gotten off to the most positive start, Spencer was glad that things had shifted between her friends to the point where Hanna expressed genuine interest and care in Natalie's well being.

"Thanks, Han. I know you two got off on kind of the wrong foot, but I really, really appreciate how willing you've been to give her a chance. She's really looking forward to properly getting to know you guys tomorrow," Spencer told the blonde who simply shrugged, the smile remaining on her face.

"Well, you can thank Emily for that," Hanna responded with a wink. Glancing down at her watch, Hanna let out a sigh before standing from her seat, quickly finishing the remaining contents of her wine glass. "I should get back to work if I want to finish up before tomorrow. Let Em know that I'll be in the study if she needs me."

Hanna took a few strides toward Xaviera and gave the little girl a peck on top of her head before turning to exit the room. And once Spencer and Xaviera were alone once more, the two redirected their attention back to their game of chess. They went back and forth trading moves, and Spencer was happy to see that Xaviera was beginning to get the hang of its concept without asking too many questions. But after a few moments, a question escaped Xaviera's mouth that was quick to catch the brunette completely off guard.

"Tia, are you and my mama dating?" Xaviera questioned, and although the little girl had asked with an heir of nonchalance, having not even spared a look up from the chessboard, the question in itself left Spencer speechless. She froze, nervously swallowing the invisible lump in her throat, and her heart instantly began to race in her chest. Her nervousness went unnoticed however, as Xaviera only continued to speak her mind freely. "'Cause sometimes I think you guys are, but then sometimes it doesn't, and I get confused."

"You and me both," Spencer muttered underneath her breath, and her break from silence was enough to cause Xaviera to finally look up from the chessboard, the inquisitiveness clear in her facial expression. Letting out a sigh, Spencer leaned back against the arm of the couch as she ran her fingers through her hair. "Its kind of complicated, little buddy."

"Well," Xaviera's voice slowly trailed, and her eyebrows now furrowed as if she was now in deep thought. "Do you love my mama?"

"I…" Spencer began, but she quickly found herself needing to pause, not knowing how to answer the question. "I, uhm… Your mom is one of my best friends, Xav. Of course I love her," she declared, but her answer only seemed to elicit an eye roll from the little girl.

"Not that kind of love, tia," Xaviera responded in exasperation. "I'm talking about the other kinda love," she continued, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. "You know…" Xaviera leaned forward, her voice dropping to a whispering tone as she said, "Love, love."

And Spencer couldn't help but let out a deep exhale at the little girl's implication. She knew exactly the type of love to which Xaviera had been referring; it wasn't rocket science to her. But, that didn't take away from the fact that Spencer knew her current biggest internal battle was between herself and her inability to confront those feelings; the feelings that she'd been afraid to deal with since Emily had stepped back into her life.

"Alright look, little buddy. Your mom…" Spencer spoke cautiously, trying to find the right words to describe her train of thought. "She means more to me than I could ever put into words. I mean, she was my first love, and that's not something that ever just goes away. But," Spencer paused once more, bringing her knees to her chest as she let out a sigh. "Like I said before, stuff with your mom and me right now is… really, really complicated. No matter what though, whether we end up dating again or not, she's always going to hold a place in my heart that nobody can touch."

"Well good, cause I'm gonna tell you a secret," Xaviera declared before she began to shuffle along the living room floor towards Spencer. "You make my mama happy," she told the older girl, now climbing into Spencer's lap and cuddling into her arms. "She used to cry lots; and sometimes me and ninang had to hold her just so she could go to sleep, but other times we couldn't. Since you came back though, that doesn't happen much anymore. So I hope you stay with her, 'cause I think she loves you."

Smiling, Spencer squeezed her arms tightly around Xaviera's body, the little girl relaxing as the two embraced one another. Spencer leaned her head against Xaviera's, turning her face ever so slightly so that she could place a kiss on top of the little girl's head.

"Thanks for the advice, kid," Spencer spoke, and the two pulled apart, Xaviera now looking up at Spencer as the two exchanged a smile. "I'll think about it."

"Think about what?"

The unexpected sound of Emily's voice caused Spencer's gaze to shift and her eyes were now trained on Emily who stood leaned against the doorway with a glass of wine in one of her hands and an all too familiar guitar in the other. Spencer quirked an eyebrow upon seeing the instrument in the girl's hand, and the smile that crept on her face seemed almost uncontrollable as she knew the exact thought behind Emily's actions.

"Now what do you think you're doing with that?" Spencer questioned playfully, and Emily gave her a coy shrug along with a wink that caused the brunette to shake her head in amusement. "Hey Xav," she continued, and though she was speaking to the little girl her eyes remained on the brunette in front of her. "You mind if I get up for a second, here? If I recall correctly, I owe your mom something."

A shy smile was quick to appear across Emily's face, and as Spencer rose from her spot on the ground, it was almost as though her mind was flashing back to 8 years before, when the girls had spent their first Christmas together as adults. Xaviera found a spot on the couch and happily watched as her two favourite people in the entire world began to interact with one another in a delicate and shy, yet familiar manner.

Emily and Spencer who were entirely zoned in on one another, and their gazes remained locked in as the two stepped forward in unison to close the small amount of distance between them. Spencer reached out for her instrument, her hand softly grazing Emily's fingertips while doing so, and the simple action was enough to elicit an uncontrollable amount of butterflies in the pit of Emily's stomach. Spencer could see her breath catch in her throat, and there was no better feeling than being able to visibly see the effect she had on the girl. Briefly dropping her gaze from Emily in order to look down at her guitar, Spencer took a deep breath, shaking out the nerves that had suddenly began to build before she glanced back up, a playful smirk now coming across her face.

"Can I play something for you?"

It was a simple sentence; 6 simple words, and yet the emotion behind them was enough to send Emily's mind reeling. Her mouth ran dry, and she let out a shaky breath, her eyes prickling with tears at the thought that just months ago, she hadn't ever expected to hear Spencer speak those words to her ever again. And yet, there they were, eight years after their first Christmas together; they weren't married – hell, they weren't even dating. They didn't know what they were, but frankly, it didn't matter. Because eight years later, 6 simple words managed to take Emily's breath away, leaving her heart rapidly beating as though trying to escape through her chest and return to its metaphorical rightful owner – the girl that now stood approximately two feet in front of her.

"Always."

Spencer nodded her head in the direction of the living room where Xaviera remained on one end of the couch, quietly watching the scene unfold in front of her, and Emily happily walked over to her daughter, lifting the little girl up so that she was now sitting on her lap. The two kept their eyes on Spencer who found a spot beside them on the couch, and they gave the girl their undivided attention as they watched Spencer nervously strum through the chords on her guitar. After a few moments, Spencer let out a deep sigh before finally looking up to Emily, giving her a warm smile as her fingers began to strum an all too familiar tune.

Emily's breath hitched ever so slightly, and she couldn't help but squeeze Xaviera ever so slightly in her arms as she instantly recognized the song. Once again, her mind flashed back to years before, her skipping a beat the same way it did when Spencer played it for her during their very first Christmas together in New York.

I'm gonna pick up the pieces,
And build a Lego house
If things go wrong we can knock it down

My three words have two meanings,
There's one thing on my mind
It's all for you

And it's dark in a cold December, but I've got you to keep me warm
If you're broken I will mend you and I'll keep you sheltered from the storm that's raging on now

The song had always held a significant meaning to their relationship; at the time when Spencer had originally played it for Emily, it was a symbol of the ups and downs that seemed to come with their relationship. Because sometimes, things got hard – it was an inevitability that came with being in a long, committed relationship. But, much like their first Christmas in New York together, although things hadn't gone the way they'd initially intended, they worked through it and grew together. And at the end of it all, that experience had been the epitome of how Spencer and Emily were able to help each other be the best versions of themselves.

I'm out of touch, I'm out of luck
I'll pick you up when you're getting down
And out of all these things I've done I think I love you better now

I'm out of sight, I'm out of mind
I'll do it all for you in time
And out of all these things I've done I think I love you better now

I'm gonna paint you by numbers
And color you in
If things go right we can frame it and put you on a wall

And it's so hard to say it but I've been there before
Now I'll surrender up my heart
And swap it for yours

In this moment, Emily knew that the song had just as significant a meaning to where they currently stood. It was years later, and still, they were working through their relationship problems together. Though they'd been separated for five years, that didn't change the fact that Emily knew Spencer like the back of her hand, and vice versa. Both of them knew exactly what it would take to make their relationship work, and Emily was certain that as long as they were willing to let their guards down and give it everything they had, they could make it through any and every bumpy road they hit, together.

I'm out of touch, I'm out of love
I'll pick you up when you're getting down
And out of all these things I've done I think I love you better now

I'm out of sight, I'm out of mind
I'll do it all for you in time
And out of all these things I've done I think I love you better now

Throughout the entire song, Emily's eyes never left Spencer. It astounded her that after so many years, the brunette was still able to play the song flawlessly. Her thoughts wondered the amount of times Spencer had played this to herself in the years that they'd been apart; Emily lost count of the number that she'd listened to it. And yet still, here they were, years later, and regardless of how many times Emily had fallen asleep to this very song – cried herself to sleep to this song – it never failed to elicit the strongest emotions from her. Because she knew that this song had more than a sentimental meaning through its words; this was the song that played when she knew she was going to be the one to propose to Spencer. The song that played when she realized she would happily work through every bump in the road with Spencer for the rest of their lives. That feeling never went away; it would never go away.

Don't hold me down
I think my braces are breaking, and it's more than I can take

Though she hadn't done it consistently throughout the song, in its final moments, Spencer kept her focus on Emily, their gazes locked in a most intimate stare. And it was incredible, how the two seemed to be able to hold a non-verbal conversation through an action as simple as eye contact. And that's exactly what they did. Emily could see just how much Spencer wanted her to understand what the song meant to her – to their relationship. She could see that all Spencer wanted was for them to be able to work together and push for a future in each other's lives. But, she could also see the fear. She saw the hesitation that came from the trepidation of them failing as a couple and the anxiousness at the thought of them potentially losing what they had waited so long to have again. Emily knew that there was no way to make those feelings go away; it was something that Spencer would have to work through on her own. But Emily would be damned if she didn't do everything in her power to help her through that internal struggle.

And it's dark in a cold December, but I've got you to keep me warm
If you're broken I will mend you and I'll keep you sheltered from the storm that's raging on now

I'm out of touch, I'm out of love
I'll pick you up when you're getting down
And out of all these things I've done I think I love you better now

I'm out of sight, I'm out of mind
I'll do it all for you in time
And out of all these things I've done I think I love you better now

Emily reached over to Spencer and placed her hand on the girl's knee as she gave Spencer a reassuring smile that Emily was sure elicited the feeling of butterflies in the pit of the brunette's stomach. And as she ran her thumb against Spencer's leg, tracing soft patterns into her jeans, Emily silently offered words of comfort, hope, and promise to the girl. The gesture in itself was simple, but in that moment it meant the world to Spencer. To know that Emily believed in them just as much as she did was exactly what Spencer needed, because even though things were complicated, Spencer knew that it wasn't just her who was in it for keeps; much like their relationship had always been, they were in it together.

I'm out of touch, I'm out of luck
I'll pick you up when you're getting down
And out of all these things I've done I think I love you better now

I'm out of sight, I'm out of mind
I'll do it all for you in time
And out of all these things I've done I think I love you better now

I'm out of touch, I'm out of luck
I'll pick you up when you're getting down
And out of all these things I've done I will love you better now

Strumming out the last note of the song, Spencer let out a shaky breath as she moved her guitar, setting it against the arm of the couch. And then, much to Emily's surprise, Spencer leaned forward, placing her hand on the girl's cheek before placing a quick, yet soft and gentle kiss on the girl's lips.

"Merry Christmas, Em."

And upon hearing Spencer's soft tone, Emily couldn't help but smile. No words were spoken in response, but in that moment she didn't feel that there needed to be. Because in that moment, along with as the rest of the night played out, the two of them cuddled together on the couch with Xaviera in between them, there was only one thought that ran through Emily's mind.

Years later, in Spencer's arms, this was still home.

And there you have it, folks! Just a nice, cute little chapter for you all. I wish I had gotten it done right on time for Christmas for you all, but hopefully you all still enjoyed it ;p. Of course, if you have any thoughts or constructive criticism on the chapter I would love to hear all of it so feel free to leave me a review! I absolutely love to read each and every single one of them. But of course, if you don't have time to leave me a review then that's okay as well! I'm just happy that you all continue to read and support my work.

Once again, thank you all for reading – it means the absolute world to me and more! I hope you all had an incredible holiday season, and if not then I hope the new year is at least treating you better than the last (which, I'm sure won't be hard because 2016 was fucking terrible). Anyways, I will hopefully see you all in the next few weeks here, but until then I love you all, and I wish you the best!