"It is an absolute human certainty that no one can know his own beauty or perceive a sense of his own worth until it has been reflected back to him in the mirror of another loving, caring human being." –John Joseph Powell, The Secret of Staying in Love

The alarm blared ripping Lovino out of his deep sleep. He sat up checking his wrists once more as he'd done every morning for the past five years. It was always the same, always that glaring pale, lightly tanned skin staring blankly back, the blue tinted veins seemed to mock him. He was always met with a sickening feeling as he pulled himself out of bed and pulled on the bland black clothing he was forced to wear. Colors were for those who were happy, people with soulmates, the law said. He wished for just once he could see green again his skin. He wanted his eyes to sparkle at the contrast, but no. He was fated to the life of those with no soulmate.

He checked his phone to see if Feliciano had cancelled. He was supposed to watch his niece and nephew. A year after his brother married, the state had given them a baby boy. Two years after that, a baby girl. It was how it worked if you were unable to have biological children. You had no say in the timeline. Of course Feliciano had been so nervous and scared. He was seventeen, never known what it was like to be around children. Of course the state didn't care about anything about that. They had their laws for the world to be perfect and never saw how terrible it actually was.

What nobody talked about, what Feliciano and Lovino had soon learned after turning sixteen was that life was about to get hard. Lovino, having been deemed to have no soulmate was given a list of his restrictions. He had to stay with his parents or Feliciano since he had no business living on his own as far as they were concerned. No more color, only black. He was barred from going to cafes and restaurants that were frequented by couples enjoying their lives. He was to report to the clinics that provided children to those who could not have them within a year every month. He was forced to choose between 3 occupations and not allowed to go to normal school. Feliciano, on the other hand, was forced to be married to a completely stranger in no more than six months. They were given a nice home. He was assigned a career and he and Ludwig were forced into parenthood at sixteen and nineteen limited to two children. Lovino found the rules to be sickening, but his brother and Ludwig seemed happy enough. Maybe he was just jealous?

Whatever. He left his room, slowly making his way downstairs. His grandfather was sitting at the table reading the paper. There was a plate of breakfast and coffee on the table for Lovino, untouched. Lovino slid into the seat mumbling a good morning to him that was not returned. He felt like he was a disappointment, an embarrassment to his family. Why? Because he fucking wrist was blank? Food never had taste these days. Days were blurs. The only person who still treated him the same was Feliciano.

He finished his breakfast and unsure as to why he even bothered. His grandfather rarely responded. He slipped out into the warm, sunny day. He loved the sunshine on his skin. It was the only thing that felt soothing these days. He kept his eyes on the ground, not daring to look up and accidentally make eye contact. He hated the whispers, the stares. Everyone knew. Even if they'd never gone to the reveal party, the state had branded him with darkness. Rumors spread so quickly. Only terrible souls couldn't have a soulmate. Lovino wondered if perhaps he did have one who possibly died. Perhaps that was why he was forced to dress like he was in mourning for the rest of his life.

"Good morning, Mr. Vargas. Care for a piece of chocolate?" Lovino looked up and offered a smile to the Priest standing in front of him, another soul doomed to have no one. Priesthood was what most men chose when their wrists ended up blank. At least there was respect in that.

"Thank you, Father," Lovino mumbled taking a piece.

"How's your brother doing these days?"

"He's good. Chiara and Keegan are getting so big. It's making him worried to miss something. He says it's like he'll blink one day and they'll be grown."

"Oh yes, that does sound like children," the priest patted Lovino's shoulder and bid him a good day.

Lovino walked on wondering about the children he'd most likely fathered. It'd been every month for the past five years he'd been going to the clinics. How many were there? He'd never know, never see them, never watch them grow. And so he was left to being content with babysitting Chiara and Keegan who he'd felt so attached to since birth. He'd been able to calm them when their parents couldn't. It was no wonder he'd chosen to be a nanny.

He smiled at the ground at the thought of those two running to greet him the moment he opened the door, their golden green eyes sparkling with laughter and their brown hair falling into their faces. He felt they looked like Feliciano which was rather strange considering. But they were wonderful kids who loved to run around and sing and play and dance. Chiara would be five soon, Keegan four. Had it really been that long? In three years he'd be moved to another family. The idea absolutely broke his heart, but at least he was their uncle and could see them when he pleased.

The smell of coffee drifted from a nearby café. He stood on the sidewalk, staring longingly. If only he could walk through those doors and just taste the milky bitter sweetness of a latte. He wanted to smile and flirt and wink again like he and Feliciano had done before this nonsensical excuse for a "utopian" society plagued them. His mouth watered. He'd not had a coffee from a café in so long and it was so close. He wondered if maybe a kind person would be inclined to do him a favor and buy one for him. He had money.

His thoughts were cut short as he nearly stumbled over from a blow from behind. He spun around to see green eyes wide staring at him, the owner's hands glued to his mouth. He was taking a few step backward. The man was dressed in brilliant colors in Lovino's opinion, dark grey track pants and a pale blue shirt. The man had a soul mate... He was recoiling from an outcast. It boiled Lovino's blood. His eyes narrowed.

"Watch where you're going, you jerk!" Lovino hissed.

The man giggled. Lovino's breath caught. He was such a beautiful sound. No. He should not be thinking about this. He didn't have a soulmate. He couldn't find things about others attractive. It wasn't possible. This man was playing with him, laughing at him. Why couldn't people leave him alone? Even children would laugh at him. Lovino was sick of it. He glanced around, no police. He wasn't allowed to confront people with soul mates.

"What the fuck is your problem?" Lovino growled taking a step forward towards him.

The man smiled and grabbed Lovino's right wrist suddenly and pushed his sleeve up. Lovino felt as though he had been struck. A knot formed in the bottom of his stomach. He chewed his lip and snatched his arm away, hugging his arm to his chest. He glanced back at the shop. He should just get Feliciano to bring him something home. This wasn't worth it.

"Fuck you…" Lovino muttered as he started to walk away only to find himself being pulled back by this left elbow. The man was looking at his other wrist as if there was something wrong with him and his sentence wasn't on his right like everyone else. "What do you want?"

Lovino only wanted to get to his brother's house. He wanted to hug his niece and nephew, proposition Feliciano get him a coffee and forget all about this asshole. He shouldn't have stopped to think about breaking the law. It wasn't enough that his own skin betrayed him and laughed at him, nor was it enough for the people in now to talk, but this guy had to stand here silently mocking him, playing with his mind. This man was so beautiful. Lovino knew something was wrong. He wanted to cry, but he refused to do that here.

The man standing in front him smiled excitedly and held out his wrist. Lovino's eyes widened. Maybe...no, he had to have written it when he wasn't looking. It couldn't…but… Lovino shook his head and pushed the idea from his thoughts. He'd twisted it over and over in his mind. It wasn't possible. You didn't just wake up with a soul mate. He knew that all too well. Five years of being reminded of it. That just didn't happen…but then why did this almost silent man have, "Watch where you're going, you jerk?" written on his wrist? It was a common phrase in someone places, right? It had to be a coincidence.

"I'm sorry. I..I don't…" Lovino couldn't say it. He shook his head. "I have to go. My brother…"

The man said something undistinguishable. Lovino knit his eyebrows. The man looked almost embarrassed. He held up a finger to Lovino and pulled out a phone. Lovino humored him. He was curious. Let Feli wait. Something wouldn't be perfect in his fucking life for once. So? He'd live. He rolled his eyes, feigning annoyance. The smiling man handed him the phone.

"My name is Antonio Fernandez Carriedo. I was born deaf. I received cochlear implants when I was eight. I can talk, but it's very muffled and unclear since I learned speech later in life and therapy didn't help me. I hate how it sounds, and honestly, my parents are the only ones who understand me. I prefer sign language and writing."

Lovino stared at him. He shook his head. "I'm not…I…my wrists are blank." The man laughed again and took the phone back.

"It's what your soulmate says out loud to you that appears. If I don't speak, your wrist is blank. Did you feel the itching and burning when it appeared?" Lovino nodded. "Then…then I think we're soulmates. Hello."

"Hi," Lovino breathed. Antonio waved and giggled.

"Do you want to get a cup of coffee? I can walk with you to meet your brother."

Lovino nodded, tears filling his eyes. He threw his arms around Antonio's neck and sobbed into his chest. He knew he'd felt it. It was over. No more shame. No more nasty comments to his family. No more black. No more being out cast. He could be free, finally free! He wouldn't have to leave his niece and nephew. And he could get that damn coffee.

Antonio hugged him close. They'd found each other. Life would be perfect.

"A bond between souls is ancient – older than the planet." –Dianna Hardy, The Witching Pen

This is kind of a critique on how utopian societies are actually dystopias if you really examine them. "Perfect" societies have very dark things in place that are just tucked away from most people.

Also a friend and I were talking and I'm thinking about maybe uploading a third installment with some of the rules/guidelines for the society. Let me know if you're interested. I wanted to put them in, but didn't want to distract too much from Lovino's story, so I just put in a few.

Thank you for reading! I really enjoyed this prompt. Please review!