This has probably been done a thousand times, but I couldn't resist. Oh and I don't own these characters. Fo sho.

Xemnas woke as the alarm clock rang at 9:00. He smashed it like he does every other morning. After putting on his trademark black robe, he went to his office to find his to-do list. To Xemnas's surprise, it was right there on the desk where he left it the night before. Usually Axel or Xigbar would have stolen it, as they are the most mischeivous of the Organization.

"Excellent..." he muttered. "Now to commence my daily activites." He read the first thing on the list:

1. Unclog Lexaeus's toilet

Xemnas groaned. Why did Lexaeus have to eat so much? He made his way to the giant's room and entered, not bothering to knock. Lexaeus, doing pushups, paid him no mind. Xemnas went to the toilet to see the damage. Sure enough, the water had risen to the top. Xemnas picked up the plunger next to the toilet and stuck it inside the bowl. He then started plunging furiously. After 5 minutes of nonstop plunging, the water finally went down. Xemnas sighed with relief. As Xemnas left the room, he turned to Lexaeus and said "Try not to use so much toilet paper next time."

Lexaeus looked at him strangely. "Toilet paper?" He then let out a hearty laugh as Xemnas rolled his eyes and walked out. He then pulled out his list and drew a line through number 1. He then read number 2:

2. Recover Zexion's book from Xigbar's bedroom

Xigbar. What a surprise Xemnas thought as he made his way to No. II's quarters. He went inside and there stood Xigbar, messing with his eyepatch. As he looked up at the Superior, he said nothing, but simply stared at him with his golden eye as a grin crept upon his face. Xemnas, also saying nothing, stared back with an intense expression. The intense staredown lasted 5 more minutes before Xemnas simply said "give it back". Xigbar tossed the Lexicon to him and motioned toward the door, his smile never fading for a second. Xemnas left, saying nothing, As he walked down the hallway he marked off 2 and looked at the third assignment:

3. Beat Luxord at cards

Xemnas, looking both ways, quickly drew a line through the assignment and looked at number 4:

4. Provoke Sora

Xemnas activated a dark portal and stepped through it. As he emerged on the other side, he saw Sora and his friends Kairi and Riku. They were eating sea salt ice cream. Not noticing his presence, he walked up behind them. Using both hands, he shoved Riku off of his rock and yelled "LET THE LIGHT FADE AND WELCOME EVERLASTING DARKNESS!" He then picked up Riku's ice cream bar and threw it in Sora's face, quickly dissappearing through a portal.

"Another one down" Xemnas stated, marking through number 4. He then looked at 5:

5. Punish Demyx

Xemnas made his way to Demyx's room. He could already hear the torturous sitar as he got within proximity. Demyx had been keepinng people up at night and it had to stop. Xemnas kicked open the door, startling Demyx so much that he threw the sitar halfway across the room. Xemnas said nothing as he walked over to where it fell, picked it up, and squeezed until it exploded into a puddle. Xemnas then wagged his finger at Demyx and left. Demyx sat there for a moment with a look of shock and confusion before shrugging and materialiaing a new sitar. He then closed his door and started strumming away like nothing happened.

Xemnas marked through number 5 and looked in horror at number 6:

6. Pick up Larxene's dirty laundry

Xemnas gulped. Everyone but the female had the common courtesy to put their dirty coats and other garments in the clothes basket. But it wasn't annoyance he was feeling; it was dread. He really didn't feel like touching her delicates while she sat there, watching. Then it occured to him: Larxene was on a mission today! Xemnas silently praised Kingdom Hearts as he made his way to her room and, looking both ways, opened the door and entered. He started picking up all of her black cloaks and t shirts. Then he picked up the shorts. Some of these hardly cover anything! he thought to himself. After putting it all in a pile, he gulped. This was it. He started picking up the lacy white bras, tossing them as quickly as possible. Then, after checking his surrounding one more time, he gathered up all of her multicolored panties and stuffed them in the bottom of the basket. He brushed himself off and sprinted out of the room, breathing a sigh of relief. He regained his stoic demeanor and looked at his list:

7. Visit brother

Xemnas sighed as he opened up a portal to the Seeker of Darkness's house. "Just be friendly" he told himself repeatedly. He knocked on the door and it swung open almost immediately. There stood "Ansem" himself.

"Xemnas! Well for darkness sake, come on in! How the darkness are you?"

Xemnas gave a half smile and entered the house.

"You just wait right there!" the Seeker of Darkness yelled. "I'll have dinner out in a dark second!"

They spent the afternoon eating and laughing. Well, "Ansem" was laughing; Xemnas just sat there and nodded at the nonsense that came out of his brother's mouth.

"So there I was waiting in line, thinking I was about to fade into darkness, when this son of a shadow comes out of nowhere and cuts in front of me! Let's just say I was about to show him the power of darkness" Ansem nudged Xemnas with his elbow as he talked. Xemnas managed a slight chuckle as he looked at an invisble watch and said "Brother, I would love to stay and chat longer, but I must resume my errands. Good day." Before the man could say another word, Xemnas had disappeared through a portal.

Back at the castle, Xemnas wiped his forehead with relief and exhaustion. He pulled himself together and looked at his list:

8. Deliver a message to Marluxia from Vexen

Xemnas wasted no time in making his way to No. XI's abode. Marluxia was laying on his bed, listening to the sounds of nature on a cassete while smelling a rose. He jumped up immediately when Xemnas cleared his throat.

"A message from Vexen" Xemnas said with a clear voice. "Marluxia, I think that you are an extremely homosexual individual and anyone can see what you are planning from a thousand miles away. HOOOOOOHOOOOOOHOOOOOOHOOOOOO!" Xemnas turned around and walked out, saying nothing more as Marluxia sat there with his mouth open. As Xemnas made his way down the hall, he wearily read number 9:

9. Inform Saix of his pet's demise

Xemnas enlisted Xaldin's aid for this assignment, as Xaldin was one of the best and biggest warriors in the Organization and would come in handy if things went sideways. They made their way to the Luna Diviner's room, giving each other police signals as they approached the door. Xemnas nodded to Xaldin, giving him his cue to open the door. As they walked in the first thing they saw was Saix staring at an empty cage. Noticing their presence, Saix looked up at them with a cold expression.

"Foofy. Where is my beloved Foofy?" he asked in the most monotonous voice ever.

"Foofy is dead" Xemnas stated, looking just as cold. "by Axel's hand."

Saix was silent, keeping his same stoic face. Suddenly, Xemnas heard a low growl escape from his mouth.

"Xaldin!" the Superior yelled as Saix ran for the doorway. Xaldin tackled the berserker and attempted to pin him, but to no avail. Xemnas jumped in as well and the two of them managed to hold him down. Saix kicked and flailed, yelling "Where is he?! I'll break every bone in his body!"

After stuggling for 5 minutes, Xaldin managed to restrain Saix's arms.

"Take him to the detention area to cool off" Xemnas commanded, pointing toward the door. As Xaldin dragged No. VII out, still kicking and screaming, he looked on his list and marked out everything he had done up to this point. He then looked at the final task:

10. Remind Zexion that there is a world beyond his room

Xemnas quickly ran to No. VI's room, eager to get this over with. He opened the door and saw Zexion doing what he always did: read and listen to Panic! at the Disco. Cringing at the high pitched voice of the singer, Xemnas approached the cd player and turned it off. Zexion looked up, finally noticing his boss.

"Where is my book?!" Zexion demanded. Xemnas pulled it out of his cloak and held it toward him.

"Do you want it? Huh?" Xemnas shook it as he taunted the bookworm with his beloved novel. Zexion angrily reached for it, but failed as it was pulled away at the last second.

"I thought you wanted it" Xemnas taunted, almost smiling.

"Give it back!" Zexion yelled, still trying to snatch it. Xemnas went over to the window and opened it. He then threw the book out of the window, smiling as it flew away to oblivion.

"NO! NOOOOO!" Zexion could only yell as his book plumetted to the depths below. "YOU SCUM!" Zexion balled up his hand and he swung at Xemnas with all of his fury.

"GUARD!" Xemnas yelled as he knocked back his angry cohort with a forcefield. He then picked up his limp body, opened a portal to Agrabah, and tossed him through it. He could have sworn he heard Zexion screaming on the other side.

He walked down the hallway, checking off the last item. Finally, his work was complete! Xemnas, feeling like the weight of the world had been lifted, opened a portal to the rooftop of the castle. There lay a folding chair, potato chips, and a box of sea salt ice cream bars. Xemnas unfolded the chair and sat down, opening the bag of chips. He laid back and smiled as he looked off in the distance at his precious Kingdom Hearts.