0.

Cheating. What a stupid word. Cheater, even more outrageous. You despise how everything sounds like a simple card game gone bad. Oh, have you been hiding aces up your sleeve? Cheater. Would the same word apply to your situation? Oh, have you kissing someone that wasn't me when I wasn't home? Have you been yearning the touch of someone that wasn't your girlfriend? Did you simply assume that since you didn't love me, that this relationship was over? Even if we never said a word to each other about breaking it off?

Cheater.
Cheater.
"You always pushed your luck."

1.
Vriska calls you over and says she has to tell you something. You fiddle with the hem of the dress and tell her that you'll be there soon. You hum happily to yourself as you finish up with your final stich. You finish quite sloppily, but you figured that you had time to fix it up later. Whatever Vriska had to tell you was most likely important.
You never came back to that dress.

2.
She was once a very beautiful customer looking for a wedding dress. You greet her with a smile, and she says your dresses are extravagant. She eyes you, looks away and says," Absolutely extravagant." You look away and try not to blush.

3.

"But what about your fiancé?" you asked her in the dark. And she was oh so careful not to respond at all, but to bite the nape of your neck. She brushes your bangs away, and ever so gently whispers your name.

4.
"Luck? I don't really believe in luck," you said in reply to her question.

"Kanaya, I didn't ask you if you believed in luck. I wanted to know if you are able to make your own luck."
You bite on your lip and stared at her quietly. You decide to take a sip of the tea in front of you when she explains," You know how in everything you do, and in everything you want, the chances of you obtaining it are either very small or nonexistent at all?"
You nod not really getting it, but wanting to get her.

"I believe chances are just a load of absolute bullshit. Whatever people believe, they don't really acknowledge the fact that statistics are merely getting in the way of achieving their personal goals. Let's just use NASA as an example. Only like 1 to 5% of the world population gets into NASA. And you know what I'm going to do Kanaya? I'm going to think that that is absolute shit. Now with my logic, the changes go from 5% to a whopping 100%!"

"Vriska, I'm not sure I'm following you. I mean, how is that possible? You merely just deny the absolute and unquestionable truth. No matter what you think, at the end of the day NASA is still only going to accept 5%. That doesn't seem like luck, Vriska."

"Hum, you make a good point, but at the end of the day, you just don't get it Kanaya."
You left your tea to become lukewarm. You sigh as Vriska got up and threw away her beverage. The tea tasted awful.

5.
Vriska's fiancé was a handsome fellow by the name of Tavros. He was a somewhat soft-spoken person, but by no means was he shy. He absolutely loved to talk to you and your staff about everything and anything. He had a farm somewhere down south. He loved animals and had dozens of pets. He was raised in a poor home, and somehow made his way up in the world.

He loved her so much. And back then, you thought that she loved him just the same He was a good man. He would have been a very good husband.
You try not to think about him these days.

6.
Even after two years, you still can't forget the look on Tavros's face when Vriska simply walks away from the altar.

7.
Even after two years, you still can't forget the look on Tavros-s face when he says "I do."

8.
"What do you think Ms. Maryam, should I hold red roses or blue roses?" Vriska asked as she held the bouquets up. "The wedding is in two days, and I cannot seem to choose at all!"

You look at your client, and quickly shake your head. "Ms. Serket, I'm merely made your dress. I believe that my opinion on this matter wouldn't be very accurate. Maybe you should ask the groom-to-be, hmm?"

"Hmm, I suppose so, Ms. Maryam but," Vriska said with hesitation. "I want you to pick out the roses."

You give her a confused smile, and simply point towards the blue.

"Perfect!" she said with a grin. And very discreetly, she leaned toward you and gave you a kiss on the check.

9.
"Since the blue rose itself is a rarity in nature, it stands for something that is hardly within one's grasp, an object that seems too difficult to be achieved. Thus the blue rose is admired and revered as an unrealizable dream."

10.
After a while, you feel as if she's never home anymore. She's always running off to another business trip, or another artifact discovery. You sometimes sit on the floor, legs crossed, and hands focused on the fabric of your latest project.

11.
It's been two years and five months, but you can recognize that man anywhere. You aren't too sure whether to approach the store or not, but your plants need a little extra help while you and Vriska go away to visit Vriska's sister.

You are apprehensive at first, but you decide that you'll be the first to say hello.
"Tavros Nitram, what a pleasure to see you after all these years!"

He turns around, and smiles. However, his face appears strained, and uneasy.

"She left me for you didn't she?"

You gap at him, and look down in shame. "I…" "Yes."

12.
"We actually met in the most unexpected place," Tavros says with a grin.

"Really? Where?" You ask earnestly. You love tailoring dresses for couples, but probably not as much as listening to their life story. You give Tavros your full attention.
You try to ignore the little voice inside your head telling you, that Vriska had never talked this passionately about Tavros before. You try to ignore the little butterflies in your stomach when Vriska walks up to you both and takes a seat closer to you.

13.
You once had your eye on a pretty blonde woman who worked in the publishing studio just above your store. You remember how your heart soared every time you look at her. You remember how happy you felt just be getting a glimpse of her.

You thought that love was like a spell which can be casted upon you at any moment. You had no idea spells are just another word for curses.

14.
You snuggled up to her, and held her tightly. You were afraid. Afraid of what they'll think of you. Afraid that you'll be spat with words like home-wrecker, or adulterer. But your worry for Vriska was far greater than your fear. She held you back. And you can't help but feel absolute relief. Nothing separated you any longer. Together. At last.

15.
"You always push your luck."

"Kanaya. I didn't mean for this to happen. I just forgot okay?"

"You forgot that you're girlfriend of three years was waiting at the home you bought with her? That whatever you do has consequences? That I have feelings too? Did you forget all of that? Bull-shit."

16.
"We live so fucking far from each other Kanaya," she says with a moan.

"It's not like we can do anything about it."

"Just move in with me." She approaches you and hugs you from behind. "It'd be soo much better than spending sixty dollars a week on gas."

17.
You hate how she always disregards everything you say. She says that it's not like you, and maybe you should rest babe, or Kanaya you're not making any sense. She used to admire you, and hang onto every word you say. You did the same to her, you still do. She still amazes you even to this day. She still surprises you, she still makes you laugh, but when the two of you are alone in your apartment, all of the joy, and the laughter dies like a flame. And you can't figure out how to ignite it again.

18.
Sometimes, you'd sit together on the bed. Your hands would be intertwined with hers, and she would uncharacteristically be quiet. You listen to her breath, and she uses her other hand to play with your hair. And you feel so guilty about this, about everything.

She tells you that her wedding was stressing her out, and you impulsively told her that you can help out with any troubles she had. You didn't realize that a silly offer would lead to moments like this. You cherish her, you adore her. You think that over the three weeks you've been seeing her that you came to love her. And she puts her hand on your shoulder and falls back onto the bed. She pulls you down, and you become overwhelmed. You love her.

19.
You have never beat Vriska in a card game. She gloats as often as she can, and you can't stand her belittling you for not having the greatest strategy. You used to be able to sit through a few games, and now you can't even stand the deck of cards. You throw all of them into the trash when Vriska goes on a trip to her mother's house.

20.
She gave you a name you never asked for. "Does that make you satisfied, Kanaya? Can we get over this already? It's over and done with, and I can't stand fighting with you for another hour."

"I'm not fighting with you Vriska. I'm done with you. It's over."

21.
You start telling your friends you are going out with Vriska two months after you started dating. You avoid friends who know Tavros. And if they found out about you and Vriska, you plead with them to be silent. They do, and you find yourself not trusting these people anymore. You don't know why.

22.
"Impressive. Vriska, I didn't know that your collection of books was this big," you say.

"Did you know that I'm a historian at the local museum?" She says with a wide grin. You stared at your client and smirk.

"Ms. Serket, may you never cease to surprise me." You look around, and take in the pirate themed décor. There also seems to be a lot of pictures of spider webs.
"A fan of the look, or the animal?" You ask curiously.

"A little bit of both," she says with a hum. "But mostly the animal." She winks at you, and you burst out laughing.

You lean into her, and she grasps your wrist. "It's been too long Kanaya."

"I know."

23.
She's in control around here, and you just keep tangling in her web.

24.
She puts on a new dress and wears it to a gathering tonight. You haven't been out in a while, since you've been working on another client's dress. You ask her if she wants you to attend.

"Sorry, Kanaya. It's the museum workers tonight. They said that we couldn't bring guests."

The next day, an upset Feferi tells you about the amazing party at the museum last night.

You don't ask Vriska about it.

25.
She tells you that she's born with luck. She sees luck. Hidden in the stars are the code to your fortune, she whispers to you. Everything around you, everything that affects you is because of the luck you possess. Your head rests on her lap, and she continues to point at the stars above your head.

She reads how the moon will affect your luck today, and she tells you that tomorrow is a good day for Virgos to stay at home and sleep with their Scorpio girlfriends.
You laugh with her, and she tries talking again. You push your lips up to her throat, and tell her to shush.

It's your turn now. And you point to a blank space in the night sky and murmur to her," At the tip of my finger there are millions of galaxies resting right underneath it. And we will never see them, but we know that they are there."

She strokes your hair with her hand, and in look in her eyes assures you that she understand exactly what you mean.

27.

"John. His name was John!"
And the denial in your heart finally falls apart. You are furious, you are devastated. A name. A name tore a relationship of three years apart A name is giving Kanaya so much grief, and so much anger. A name comes crashing down, and ruins a love Kanaya cherished so much.

No.

Vriska did.

28.
"She left me for you didn't she?"

You gap at him, and look down in shame. "I…" "Yes."
"Tavros, I'm sorry."

You are suddenly surrounded by a pair of strong arms. "I know you are, Kanaya. You are a very good woman. And a very good friend."
You cry in his arms, and he sighs.

"If she doesn't love me anymore, then why would I ever force her to stay?"

29.
In a rush, you pack the essentials. Your phone, IDs, clothes, and everything you can fit into two luggage bags and rush off. She won't follow you, you told her not to. You don't slam the door, because you aren't angry. You're tired. You want to go home.

30.

You walk away. From Vriska, from your life, from your career and no matter what direction you go, you feel that none of them are heading in the wrong direction.