(A/N) Wow it's been literally ages since I've posted anything! I still write occasionally, but nowhere near as much as I did in high school or college. Big kid life now! haha. just kidding. I'll never outgrow writing! anyway, I wrote this Skins piece sometime last year and meant to make it a whole series, but I let it sit too long and forgot where I was going with it. Luckily, what I had works as a one-shot too - so I decided why not just post it? This focuses on Tony and Effy's always intriguing sibling-ship in early Season 1 haha... hope you guys enjoy!

In Tony Stonem's eyes, there was no one quite like himself.

Nobody could understand him – the rapid complexities of his brilliant mind or his icy excuse for a conscience – but then again, it's not like anybody really deserved to, right? He carried his flippant detachment in a bubble around his body, and not a single person who passed through his 17-year-long walk of life so far had managed to cast the dart that could penetrate it.

There'd been some close calls.

His parents, for one. Tony didn't care for them too much - his father's volatile temper and mother's over-judgmental eye - but at the same time, it's not like he wanted them to die or disappear or anything. Overall, he'd like to think he'd probably be considerably upset if anything happened to them. That had to count for something.

Closer? Michelle. Nips. Physical love was the driving force behind this particular relationship, true, but it still counted too.

There was Sid, of course. The closest Tony would get to truly caring about another person. In fact, there were times when Sid would be there for Tony, without fail and without question – when Tony would swear he felt pinpricks of genuine love straining to break through the impenetrable shell around his heart. …But then his best friend would go and do something so laughable or pathetic, and the pinpricks would retreat once again.

And then there was Effy.

Pop. Bulls-eye.

To Tony, there was no one quite like Effy. For some reason, his little sister was the only human in the entire world who could understand him, who could easily access onto the esoteric plane on which he lived, who could surprise him by burrowing almost unnoticed into his heart. She was the only person he considered to be worthy of his attention. In her, he found his equal. Sometimes Tony wondered if Effy was the only person in the world he could truly say he loved.

When Tony and Effy were younger, they used to go out walking with their parents. Passersby would often watch and wonder if the chatty blundering Mr. and Mrs. Stonem were even related to the two children trailing so self-assuredly behind them – the two dark-haired, silently beautiful children with the matching mischievous smirks and gleaming eyes too wise for their young ages.

And even now, when Tony and Effy were out in public – say, driving in their car or loitering in corners with cigarettes dangling from their graceful fingers – people couldn't help but be intrigued by the pair. "The Stonem siblings," they'd whisper, half in reverence and half in disdain. The mysteriously beautiful brother and sister who only had eyes for each other and who never deigned to let anybody else into their own little Stonem world. Together, the two of them walked high above everyone else. Gods among mortals. They could never really belong.

To Tony, there was no one quite like Effy.

Tony pulled back his blinds with one finger, checking on Effy's progress below. Dinner had been yet another interminable affair. Effy and Tony had only survived by throwing food bits at each other, conveying silent jokes about their agonisingly ordinary parents with each smirk or flicker of their stunning blue eyes.

From his window, Tony could see Effy's tiny frame step out of the house. She carefully peeled off her pajamas – first her sweater, then sweatpants – to reveal a ripped blue tank top and short black skirt, with stockings that wrapped to an end high around her smooth white thighs.

Mum and Dad would have conniptions if they ever saw half the things Effy leaves the house in, Tony thought to himself, amused.

He couldn't even count how many times he and Effy perfected this routine: she would sneak out of the house and stash her disguise in the bin under Tony's window, and Tony would keep watch. It'd been this way for as long as Tony could remember.

Thus, as a result, Tony had seen (and appreciated) a wide assortment of his sister's choices in going-out attire over the years.

Might as well appreciate them, for the sake of pure aesthetics, Tony internally shrugged as his gaze fixated on Effy's lithe limbs and flat expanse of abdomen. There wasn't anything weird about it. After all, he often observed girls and boys alike, even his middle-aged neighbor Mrs. Leatherby. The human body was a thing of beauty and should be admired. And his sister was beautiful.

Effy finished changing, shut the lid of the bin, then glanced back up at Tony's window. Tony smirked. Damn those eyes. They're going to get her into trouble one day.

Indeed, Effy's gaze was one of the most alluring things about her. One look from those tempting black kohl-smeared cat eyes could bring grown men to their knees. They were weapons that gave young Effy more power than she knew what to do with – but as with everything in her life, she was quickly learning how to use them to her advantage.

Tony watched Effy go until she turned the corner, then pulled out his phone to ring Sid. Judging by the usual timetable, Tony registered that he had about 40 seconds to chat before his parents would be round to check on Effy. They'd done this so many times that it was almost second nature by now.

Sid's line rang until his voicemail beeped.

Tony kept his emotionless tone aloof, but a tinge of hurt flashed through him. "So is this the silent treatment you're giving me?" He shoved the phone into the crook of his neck as he swung into Effy's room and plopped onto her bed. His hand found the hidden stocking and he pulled it over his foot. "Michelle's the one who broke up with me, remember?"

Tony paused, suddenly hearing his parents' voices coming up the stairs. He hung up and pulled the covers over his head. As he hid there in silence, Tony still couldn't help feeling slightly annoyed – the fact that he couldn't even reach Sid, someone who was always there for him, left him with a vaguely hollow feeling in the pit of his stomach. As if it were the precursor to sadness: the thing he would've felt were he capable of emotion.

When his parents finally left Effy's room, Tony pushed the covers off his face but didn't get up. Instead, he lay there for a long time, staring unblinkingly at the ceiling. How the fuck did my life end up like this?

Tony glanced idly at his phone again. It remained resolutely silent. Like Effy.

This has been the weirdest fucking night of my life.

Tony had muttered the words to Michelle, clutching his phone to his ear in a cloud of haze, as if not really believing where he'd actually ended up. Slapped and deserted by Sid, almost mugged outside a police station, standing outside a neon lighted sports club?

Michelle had said something after, but Tony didn't hear. As he dropped the phone to his side, all he heard was Josh's closeted-gay voice ringing over and over again in his mind – "Effy says hi."

That was eleven minutes ago.

Eleven minutes had passed – who knew how much longer?– and now Tony was at Effy's side, surge of energy like he'd never known pounding through him, shaking her unconscious body.

"Please," he muttered frantically under his breath. "Please, Effy." Tony felt an unrecognizable ache in the pit of his stomach. A wellspring of wild emotion that started there and traveled to the top of his throat, where it sat burning and straining to break out – and… are these fucking tears? Tony swiped angrily at his right eye in disbelief, placing the unnamed feeling at last: wild, genuine desperation. He couldn't remember ever feeling this way. You can't leave me, sis. You're the only one. You can't leave me with this fucked-up world.

Twelve minutes now.

With fumbling fingers, Tony dialed the police and talked to them on mental autopilot. Location… location? He turned to one of the pretentious neon-clad hooligans. "Directions - " Tony could barely get the words out.

"Here. I'll give them the directions." Spencer reached down and took the phone – and before Tony even registered what was happening, the phone was snapped in half.

Tony snapped too.

Fourteen minutes.

Tony was on the ground now, being kicked, threatened, even punched, most likely – but he barely felt anything. All he felt was The Desperation, growing like a fireball inside as he lifted his head to the side to look at Effy. Her crumpled body was so close, just a few feet away, but Tony could do nothing to help her. The helplessness of the situation was what killed him the most.

"-until you fuck your sister."

"What?" Josh's words shook Tony out of his reverie.

"You heard me."

"She's my sister." Genuine fear clutched at Tony's throat. He lunged again at Josh, but was shoved back down onto the concrete.

"You put pornographic pictures of my sister on my phone… I make you fuck your sister."

"But I – can't, I…" For the first time, words failed him. The math quickly filtered through Tony's mind; the odds of successfully getting out of the situation were dwindling with each passing second. He sorted through every possibility. I don't know what to do.

In one last futile motion, Tony shifted his head to look at Effy again. Effy, with her teased hair, smeared lipstick, and lifeless white limbs. I couldn't, Tony thought helplessly, wanting to cry. I couldn't, Effy, I can't, I can't.

There was a time when Tony loved when Effy was on drugs.

The way she looked when she swayed to the thumping bass, her eyes closed and brown hair fanning over her face or down her back. The way she would, every so often, languidly raise an arm as if reaching for an invisible note and spin into the melody like the music was coursing through her very veins. In those moments, Effy was fearless and she was beautiful and Tony could never take his eyes off her.

And when the tidal waves of music would eventually wash her possessed body ashore at Tony's feet, they would look at each other with those identical knowing smirks and cutting blue eyes as the rest of the insignificant world passed between them. They never said anything; they never needed to. In a room full of people, they were always drawn together.

The Stonem siblings. The world could barely handle one of these perfectly beautiful enigmas – and there were two of them.

But after tonight, Tony didn't think he could ever feel that way again. Because after tonight, any pill Effy would place on her tongue, any grain that would pass through her nose, any ounce of spliff she would inhale – would remind Tony of this moment: him, carrying her lifeless body across a lawn in the middle of bloody nowhere.

He didn't see anyone fearless or beautiful or lovely in this moment. Just two scared children who didn't know what to do. He also no longer saw the things he did as exciting, but as careless. Actions that made someone want to hurt his little sister. This is my fault. It was a wake-up call on so many levels.

Later, as they were barreling towards hospital in the backseat of Sid's car, Sid would ask Tony: "So how did you manage to get out of there?"

Tony blinked once. "I begged."

"Begged? Begged who? Josh?"

"Yeah."

Sid looked bewildered. "Wow. D'you mean it, then?"

Tony opened his mouth to respond, but then paused to consider. In theory, it did sound ridiculous – Tony Stonem begging anyone for anything. But he had. "I'll do anything," he'd pleaded with Josh, while pinned to the pool table. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

It was also the first time he'd ever apologised to someone.

As if in a foggy memory, Tony thought back to a few days prior, when he had followed Michelle to her house. She'd asked him right there and then, to beg for her back. "Tell me like you'd die for me!" she'd yelled. "Like nothing else matters, like your world stops turning because of me! Like you mean it, you little shit!"

Tony couldn't do it. He'd tried – honestly, he really had. But he just wasn't wired that way and he hadn't understood why Michelle couldn't see that.

But tonight, Tony understood. Because, as it turned out, he was wired that way. When Josh had asked Tony to beg, there was no hesitation. There was no effort expended, no thought required, no brain working at top speed to design the most premeditated sentence that would save him most face. The apologies had spilled out of Tony's mouth while his whole mind was devoted to one thing and one thing only: Effy.

Because he would die for her. Because nothing else mattered. Like his whole world stopped turning because of her.

Like he meant it.

"Yeah," he replied shortly in the silence, as Sid's driving continued jostling them along. "Yeah. I meant it."

The first words Effy Stonem spoke in almost a year were to her older brother, Tony, while they were sitting together in the car. They were: "Ah, fucking wanker."

"Effy." Tony's eyes had widened half in surprise that she had actually spoken and half in confusion at her outburst. "What's the matter with you?"

"Michelle."

"Hey, I tried-"

"Wanker."

"I tried!"

"Nah. Wanker."

Silence. Tony faced forward. "I liked it better when you didn't talk."

The first words Tony Stonem spoke in almost a week after the accident were to his younger sister, Effy. Her name. Tony was having those recurring nightmares again, the ones that always started with a phone call and ended with the bus screeching toward him. He would wake up just in time, straight up in bed, sweating, with "Effy!" already dying on his lips.

And Effy would run into his room, doe eyes wide and bow lips slightly parted in just-awoken surprise. The very first time it happened, she had cried out, "Fuck! What's wrong?" Now, however, she had learned exactly what to do: burrow straight into her brother's bed and carefully rock his shivering body until he fell back asleep. She'd done this routine for him so many times that it was almost second nature.

Sometimes she would read to him, a book of Greek myths.

One night, Effy was reading the story of Orpheus, and Tony was watching her intently from his bed. She was so beautiful this rare innocent way too, her long legs folded into the chair and lashes brushing her bare cheek. His heartbeat ebbed and slowed in her presence.

"Eff?"

She looked up. "Yes, Tone?"

"I really like your voice. You know. I don't know why you stopped talking in the first place."

One corner of Effy's lips curled upwards slightly. "Thanks, Tone."

(A/N) Thank you for reading! Please feel free to leave any comments or reviews :)