A/N; I do not own Twilight and never will. I just like to play with them a little.

Chapter one - I will not break

I will not break, I will not break, I will not break, I will not break!

I kept chanting this through my head as I wondered through the woods, falling and slipping over slippery pieces of broken tree, rocks and twigs that was in my way, my clothes were damaged and soaked but I didn't care I just kept moving forward.

I will not break, I will not break, I will not break, I will not break.

It was nearly night fall but I needed to do this, I needed to get this out of my system before it truly destroyed me. I couldn't do this any more, couldn't sit around and slowly kill myself over something that happened almost five months ago, I couldn't put Charlie through all this, couldn't continue to hurt him. I could see it every day, see his eyes dim and his face would fall when he looked at me, as he watched me move around the house, watched as I cleaned and cooked like I was supposed to, without doing anything else out of routine.

I couldn't do this, I knew I was going to break with each step I took I knew I was getting closer to the end, getting closer to the place I knew it should all be done, but what was going to end was becoming unclear by the hour.

No! I stopped, forcing my feet to stop moving as I shook my head, I was not going to think this way! I'd suffered, become a shell of myself, abandoned my friends and my life, hurt my dad and my mum and yet it had never gotten to this point, the point where I'd consider ending it completely. No I had a task to do today and I needed to do it, the first step in moving on and all.

I lifted my foot once more taking a step forward only to feel my foot slip once more causing me to tumble towards the ground.

"Ow," I spoke aloud hardly recognising my own voice, it had been a while since I'd spoke, I did it when needed and when Charlie would ask me a question but I never did it when I was alone, I didn't want to hear the raspy voice that sounded much like a whisper.

I could feel the wetness slip down my arm, great that's all I needed, I could feel the dizziness as the salty, rusty smell assaulted my nose, holding my breath I reached into my pocket and pulled out a plaster, covering the cut before dirt could get into it and infect it, I didn't react well to blood, imagine what it was like with blood and puss. My stomach turned.

Placing both hands on the ground I heaved myself back up, continuing to watch the ground as I moved forward.

I will not break, I will not break, I will not break, I will not break.

I was almost there, the tree's were beginning to thin and the floor was beginning to even out, I was almost there, I could feel the anticipation, feel it so much my speed increased, and after ten more steps I broke the clearing, entering a meadow that looked different from the last time I was there.

I closed my eyes as I stopped in the middle of the grass, planting my feet as I let my mind slip into that place I refused to go and into a few minutes of bliss where I wasn't here alone and cold arms were around me.

No! I snapped them back open the cold air hitting me like a tone of icy bricks, I was not going to go there, not today, not now, I'd come this far! sliding my bag of my shoulder I sat on the floor, the sky was turning dark and I knew I had to be quick, so pulling the zip down I emptied my belongings on the floor, everything of mine that held a memory of that time.

The last things that were removed were the lighter and paper I'd brought with me, slowly I picked up each item and held the lighter to them, first to go were the pictures, the little squares that held the most memories, the smiles, the laughs, they all brought tears now. flicking the lighter I lit it and watched the flames burn away the faces. Next the birthday gifts, the radio was the hardest to burn, it took the paper, and a little hairspray to set that thing alight, but I watched that, the plane tickets and all the clothes burn, watching as the flames grew higher and the memories faded away.

I sat there for a while longer, watching the blue and orange dance until it burnt out and all that was left was ash, I sighed, it was all gone, everything that held anything to remind me was gone, and yet the memories were still there.

I placed my head in my hands, I couldn't get rid of anything to do with them, it had been five months and they were still there.

"I promise that this will be the last time you'll see me. I won't come back. I won't put you through anything like this again. You can go on with your life without any more interference from me. It will be as if I'd never existed," I snorted, it seemed so easy for him to say that but if he could see me now, I couldn't imagine what he'd think. Five months ago he and the rest of his family walked away from me, Alice, Jasper, Emmett, Rosalie, Carlisle and even Esme left without even a goodbye, I was nothing to them, nothing of importance and here I was crying on the forest floor at the memory of them. I was so pathetic.

I lifted my head, today was supposed to be about forgetting, about moving on and letting them go, why was it so hard?

I clutched my chest feeling the ache of loss, holding myself together was a full time thing these days, falling asleep was the hardest, I hated this.

It was dark by now, the air was chill and the only light was coming from the little torch I'd removed first. I knew I needed to head home, Charlie would be so worried if I didn't return soon, once more I sighed as I stood from the floor, brushing the dirt away as I turned to leave.

"Don't you know it's not safe to be alone in the woods at night?" I froze, my heart began to race as a chill ran up my spine, I wasn't alone like I thought I'd be, there was someone here, and that someone was close.

Slowly I turned my body around, turned slowly towards the voice and gasped. It wasn't just the one figure but five, and as I shone my light towards them I caught a glimpse of red.

Vampires.

"I was just heading back home actually," I smiled sweetly not trusting myself to turn just yet.

"Oh? Then do tell why are you here alone?" the middle figure stepped forward slightly causing me to step back.

"Who said I was alone?" I tried to play dumb, they didn't know I knew what they were.

"I can't smell anyone else," crap I thought they'd take the bait, I was told that humans couldn't know about vampire's existence, not unless they were going to be killed. The thought didn't bother me as much as it should.

They stood staring at me, each with a chilling smile, except one, he stood a little back regarding me with curiosity, his yellow eyes shining bright amongst the sea of red, at least that's one that wouldn't kill me. Right then as I stared at each of them I made a mistake.

"Look I know what you are, and if you're going to kill me then just get it over with, I'm fed up of you vampire's and the crap you keep putting me through," I hadn't meant to shout, but for once my voice felt strong, I was determined to end this, end this life and let go of the pain, if this was the way I was supposed to go, it was welcomed, yet I regretted the words as soon as I thought them, what would Charlie think?

I stood straight and didn't break eye contact as they gasped.

"How do you know?" the middle asked once more as he stepped a little closer, this time I didn't move.

"It doesn't matter how I know, all you need to know is that I do," they'd left me, took away my life but no matter what they were still family, even if they didn't want me.

Suddenly he was in front of me, his eyes staring into mine, red and brown meeting and all I could think about was how to control my heart and how different this man was to the Cullen's. He was older, his skin looked winkled where the Cullen's all looked like models this man didn't. He was still beautiful, no one could deny that but there was something sinister about the way this man looked, and how he was looking at me.

I was about to step aside when he reached for my hand, grabbing it and holding it as he closed his eyes. a few moments passed before they snapped open and he regarded me with the same curiosity as the other.

"Impossible."

"Master?" One to the right called, a small woman who looked like she was itching to step closer.

"It's nothing to worry about my dear, but I wonder if you could do me a favour," he nodded his head towards me and she narrowed her eyes, staring at me in a way that made me uncomfortable. "Incredible," he mutter after a second of this. "I wonder, Eleazar what do you think?" he turned towards the man who couldn't keep his eyes of me, he kept his eyes in place as his lips moved, a silent conversation that was happening between the two, I didn't know what they were saying but I wanted to go home.

"Not so fast," I'd taken a step when he'd appeared in front of me once more, "there's no hurry is there?"

"Will you please let me go?" I begged.

"Not just yet," he paused and I could see he was waiting for my name, I stared at him before something compelled me to speak.

"Bella." He beamed.

"Hello Isabella, this is my coven Jane, Felix, Demetri, Eleazar and I am Aro," he smiled further.

"Hello," I whispered suddenly afraid, I knew exactly who this guy was, Carlisle and - I didn't think his name - had told me a story about Aro and the rest of the Volturi. "Please can I go?" I knew it was a long shot that they'd let me go, I knew about their world, knew their secret, the one law they had to keep.

"That isn't allowed dear Bella," his face never fell but my heart did, "but I can offer you something different, something more than death," my head snapped up. "Immortality."

It was my turn to gasp.

"I can give you the world, give you a chance to escape death, a chance to rule Isabella. You're powers will be strong, Eleazar here can sense that much but the rest you block I've never seen anything like it, join us Bella and whatever the reason you're here will be left behind, it's a chance for a new life, join us."

"Do you think this is a good idea? Someone has told her about this life, who says they won't do that again?" The woman spoke.

I didn't know what to say, didn't know how to respond, there was a war inside me a war that I couldn't battle. I had two choices, I could refuse, say no and die here and now and end the pain, but that would leave Charlie with no goodbye, no reason to why I died, he would find my body and be lost. I couldn't do that to him.

The other choice is I could turn, I could become a vampire, something HE never wanted me to be, I could rid my mind of the Cullen family forever, I could protect them, if Aro could figure who it was that told me they'd be sentenced to death, I could stop that if I was turned and on the inside. I could give Charlie the life and a goodbye he deserves.

there was only one option here.

I couldn't find my voice, my mind was made up but I knew if I spoke aloud it would be final, so instead I nodded my head slightly, and with a smile they disappeared, just like that.

A/N: So like most people know I have dyslexia so spelling and grammar are a little hard for me, but I do hope you look past some of the mistakes and give this a chance.

Anyway I hope you like this, it's an idea that's just been on my mind for far too long and I needed to get it down, so let me know.

Jess

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