Chapter 39: Bad Omen

Wataru was traipsing around the bare tree in front of the Sunrise Residence when Kazuhiko arrived the next morning. Though he´d had his heart set on spending the night with Louis in the apartments, Ryoko had called yesterday to check up on Louis and to have Kazuhiko go back to her and Isao´s house so they could celebrate New Year early, given the brunette would spend the 31st with Louis and the couple would celebrate with Isao´s family.

It had been a quick, private dinner. There was small talk, a lot of talk about Louis and what he and the brunette would do from now on. There were some hugs and kind words spoken before Kazuhiko left for his apartment. He decided he´d spend the night there, stuff clothes and other personal items in a bag the next day and then go back to the Sunrise Residence. Which was exactly what he did, and a bit before nine in the morning, Kazuhiko found himself staring up at Wataru in the tree, duffel bag in hand.

The brunette narrowed his eyes, watched as the boy climbed between the bare branches trying to do who knows what.

"Wataru-kun!" he called.

Wataru looked down when his name was called. He grinned, waved with his whole arm. "Kazu-nii, good morning! I´m glad you´re back. Louie-tan seemed to miss you this morning at breakfast," he hollered.

Kazuhiko tried not to smile at the last part of the comment. Instead he asked, "What are you doing up there?"

Wataru´s smile widened. "It´s New Year´s Eve."

"So?"

"So it´s time to take the Christmas decorations down. See, Kazu-nii, Masa-nii likes to do a massive cleanup every 31st. We´ve done it since, like, forever! We sweep and we clean the garden and leave the tree bare and stuff. And this year it´s finally my turn to take them down!"

Wataru leaned his cheek against one of the thickest branches. "Masa-nii hadn't let me climb the tree before because he said it was too dangerous and I might fall, but since he´s so busy with Louie-tan now, when I asked he said I could, and here I am." He grinned for the third time in less than three minutes.

Kazuhiko´s lips twitched. "And no one has noticed you´re out here, up in the tree?"

"Almost everyone is still having breakfast… or sleeping. Louie-tan is cutting the Tsuba-nii´s hair." Wataru shrugged. "No one´s noticed I´m missing yet."

Kazuhiko sighed, put down his bag. He rolled up his sweater sleeves.

The child stared at him, curious. "What are you doing, Kazu-nii?"

"I´m going to help you, kiddo. I don't want you to fall off the tree and I´m not going inside either because it might tip your brothers on the fact you´re out here. The faster this is done, the better for everyone." He walked closer to the tree, eyed it up and down, then put his hands on the trunk. He wasn't sure he could do this. He hadn't climbed a damn tree since he was like eight years old, and even then he hadn't been able to do it very well. He wasn't the most athletic person out there, had never been really.

"Here goes nothing," he muttered, gripped the trunk and hoisted his body upwards. After another jump, some wiggling and some muttered curses, Kazuhiko was standing on the tree, hanging on to the branches for dear life.

"The tree is not very tall. Even if we fall, it isn´t going to hurt very much," Wataru told the brunette.

"Yeah, well, let´s not even think about falling. Give me a couple of seconds to stop looking down and think about how I can land on my head and die, then we can take down the rest of the lights and other thingies you guys hung up here."

Wataru nodded, counted two seconds, then said, "Are you ready now?"

"… Sure, sure." Kazuhiko let go of one of the branches and reached out with his free hand to untangle the Christmas lights. He managed to work that one branch, then he moved a millimeter and began working on the other.

Wataru stared at him for a few minutes. He almost laughed, but then he recalled Ukyo´s lessons on common sense and politeness, so he turned away and climbed on top of a branch. He dragged his body along it and unhooked the ornaments. The branch bent. He didn't pay it any mind.

"Wataru-kun, be careful! If you crawl too far into the branch it might break."

"It´s no big deal, Kazu-nii. I´m going to be fine. Can you please take down the huge Santa ball that´s hanging from the far branch? Yes, that one!" When Wataru confirmed he meant the farthest, thinnest branch Kazuhiko was pointing at, the latter paled.

"H-How did you even get it up there?" he croaked.

"Tsuba-nii found a very large stick. He used it to put the ornaments at the very top."

"And you couldn't have told me earlier?"

"It´s much more fun to do it this way. Get it down, Kazu-nii, get it down!"

Kazuhiko swallowed hard. He knew the tree wasn't very tall, he knew if he felt he wasn't going to get hurt since the ground was covered in snow. He knew it, yet he didn't feel like making sure a fall wouldn't hurt.

"I can get it myself if you don't want to…" Wataru began, seeing the hesitation in the brunette´s face.

"Heck no. I won´t risk you having an accident," Kazuhiko replied in a sharp tone. He swallowed, threw caution out the window and stretched out both his body and his arm. He took a tiny step forward, then another, another one. If he jumped now maybe he could grab the stupid ornament and come down without…

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TWO IDIOTS DOING?!"

Kazuhiko jumped a mile upon hearing the ear-splitting scream. He lost his footing, flailed his arms like crazy and tried to hang on to the branches only for his fingers to ouch nothing but air. He was airborne for a split second before landing on his back on the snow with a loud splat.

"Kazu-nii!" Wataru cried almost in a panic, then climbed down to a solid part of the trunk before jumping and landing on his knees next to the brunette. "Are you okay? Kazu-nii, are you hurt?"

Before Kazuhiko could answer, laugther rang out, loud and clear. Stunned but not hurt, the brunette tilted his head back to see Hikaru walking toward them, his phone held out. Was he… recording?

"Oh, that was priceless, Kazuo. One of the best falls I´ve ever seen in my life, and believe me, with over five little brothers, I´ve seen a lot good ones. I can´t wait to show this to Tsubaki," the redhead almost cooed, put his phone away and hunched down on the other side of Kazuhiko.

"You´re not really hurt, are you? I mean, the snow must have cushioned your fall," he continued.

"You scared us!" Wataru accused. "I thought it was Masa-nii coming out to pull my ears or something, and Kazu-nii´s too."

"That was kind of the impression I wanted to make, kiddo. I didn't expect either of you to fall, though, but it looks like Louie-chan´s beau is a bit clumsy."

Kazuhiko frowned up Hikaru. "Very funny, Hikaru-san. It wouldn't be any good if I had actually gotten hurt. I can´t take care of Louis if I´m in a hospital bed," he pointed out.

"On the contrary, Kazuo, on the contrary. If you were in a hospital bed yourself then Louis would have no reason to get out of his own, or yours, for that matter."

The brunette´s cheeks flared red. Wataru glanced between the two of them, confused, then shrugged. "You´re not going to tell Masa-nii, are you, Hika-chan? He did give me permission to come out and do this."

"No, I won´t tell, and he only gave you permission because he was too busy fussing over Louis trying to get out of his damn chair."

That caught Kazuhiko´s attention.

"Wait. What?!" he cried, and sat up as fast as he could.

Hikaru gave him an amused glance. "Yeah, figured that little bit would get your attention. I actually saw you trying to act like a monkey from inside the building, so I thought I´d come out here and drag your butt inside so you can knock some sense into Louie-chan… and have some fun in the process," he said.

The brunette frowned. Wataru said, "You can be scary sometimes, Hika-chan."

"Isn´t it, great, Wataru? Don't I brighten up everyone´s life with a little fear?" Hikaru winked at the child, then grabbed Kazuhiko´s arm and helped him to his feet.

"Now do go inside, Kazuo, and try to deal with your boyfriend. Oh, and try to talk him out of cutting his hair, too. He said he wanted to do it after he finished with Tsubaki´s, what with the new year around the corner and who knows what else," he said. He watched Kazuhiko go pale at the last part, and he patted his shoulder.

"Go, save his beautiful and exotic hair," he said.

Kazuhiko fled.

Wataru eyed Hikaru, who grinned at his youngest brother. "You and I, let´s get up that tree and finish with the decorations before Masa-nii notices we´re not inside."

"You´re going to help me?" Wataru asked.

"Are you kidding me? I love doing this, and it´s fun when Ukyo comes out and sees me doing it. It makes him mad. Let´s get you up. One, two… three!"

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Louis had had an epiphany while trimming Tsubaki´s hair and then reapplying the white dye on the long black roots. Tsubaki said he hadn't let anyone touch his hair since the last time Louis had dyed it, which meant it had been well over two, almost three months. The twin´s hair was back to his natural black with only the tips white. Though it looked stylish Tsubaki had almost begged Louis to fix it as soon as he was done with breakfast.

Eager to do what he knew best, the redhead had complied, and after having finished their food Tsubaki had wheeled him up to the third-floor bathroom because it was the biggest in the house.

Louis had tried to stand up to cut his brother´s hair because doing so while sitting was just impossible. That of course sent Tsubaki into a panic and had him yelling for Masaomi to come up and make sure Louis was still sane. The oldest son stayed and almost ended up arguing with Louis on how he didn't have to get out of the chair and Tsubaki could wait, but Louis was adamant about doing his job as a hairdresser and of standing on his own two feet. After much arguing with Masaomi, the doctor allowed him out of the chair only if he got to oversee the whole process. Louis accepted for one simple reason: the new year was hours away, and he didn't want to start it in a freaking wheelchair.

That´s when the epiphany came: the new year was around the corner. This was a chance – a bit sudden, perhaps, but a chance nonetheless – to put various issues behind him, issues concerning his family and their relationship with Kazuhiko. He would have said it was a chance to put the shooting behind him as well. However, since he refused to even think about it he discarded the idea.

With the sudden revelation of what this new year could mean to him if he did things right and if he tried to clean his spirit with this new beginning came another thought:

New year, a fresh start… why not put more effort into it and change his appearance to show how determined he was to make the coming year much better than this last one?

Since he thought it while cutting Tsubaki´s hair, all he did was glance at himself in the mirror for a couple of seconds before deciding what he was going to change about his own body.

Tsubaki left the bathroom as soon as Louis was done with him. The redhead let out a tired sigh and leaned against the sink. Masaomi – who´d stayed in the doorway this whole time – said, "You looked tired. You need to sit down."

"I´m fine. In a little pain, but fine," Louis insisted, then reached for his scissors. These were the extra pair he kept in the building along with other of his working items. The combs, scissors and other things he usually worked with were in Kazuhiko´s apartment.

Masaomi shifted as he saw the redhead play with the scissors. "Did anyone else ask you to cut or do something to their hair?" he asked.

"No. I´m going to cut mine."

"… Excuse me?"

Louis limped/jumped on one foot over to the bathtub. He then sat down on it, hung his head and reached for the faucet under the showerhead.

Masaomi stared. "Louis," he began.

"Yes?" the redhead replied.

"Your leg hurts, I can see it. Get back in your chair. You can cut your hair another day, if you really want to do it."

"No, it has to be today, and I don't want to start the new year stuck in a chair, Masaomi-nii-san. It´d be a bad omen."

"That is terribly superstitious of you, Louis. Your body is what is real, and it needs to sit down and rest."

The redhead shook his head.

Masaomi sighed. "I am going to kill Tsubaki for sending you into this dumb spiral which I don't understand at all. Did you have a revelation while dying Tsubaki´s hair? Is that it?"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. Who had a revelation? Who the hell is turning into a prophet or god or whatever?" Hikaru´s voice interrupted, and then the fiery redhead poked his head into the bathroom.

Masaomi crossed his arms over his chest and turned to look at Hikaru. "He won´t get back in his darned chair, and he wants to cut his hair. I think working with Tsubaki set something off in his mind."

Hikaru frowned. "Louie-chan, what are you doing?" he asked.

"I´m about to cut my hair," Louis replied, then tilted his head and ran the water.

Hikaru frowned. "I thought you were trying to let it grow like down to your knees or something. You haven't let any scissors near your hair in like two years."

Louis shrugged as he let the water fall over his reddish-pinkish threads. "It´s a new year. Having a new hairstyle doesn't sound like a bad idea."

Masaomi sighed.

Hikaru turned to him. "Did that make sense to you?"

"Not in the least." The doctor shook his head, lowered his voice. "I think at this point and with whatever is going through his head right now nothing short of Kazuhiko-kun´s words are going to knock some sense into him."

"Looks like you've lost your place as Louie-chan´s conscience, Masa-nii," Hikaru replied.

"It´s gotten worse. I´m kind of hating the situation, but well." Masaomi shrugged, then shooed Hikaru away. "Now get out of here and try to see if Louis´s new conscience has arrived yet."

Hikaru rolled his eyes, gave a mock military salute and left the other two men in the bathroom. Masaomi went back to staring at his brother, who after getting his hair completely wet limped back to the mirror. He reached for the combs and began straightening locks of hair out before measuring, adjusting and cutting.

"You don't need to do all the stuff you did for Tsubaki?" Masaomi asked. "I mean, you parted his hair and then moved him around various times."

"It´s different when you´re doing your own hair. Most hairstylists find it harder. I think it´s easier, plus I also know what haircut I want, and it´s not very complicated."

"You know I´m very worried about you right this second, aren't you? Both because of you not sitting down and this hair thing."

"I feel fine."

"I think you´re depressed."

Louis´s hands froze. He looked at Masaomi on the mirror. "I´m not…" he began, but right then Kazuhiko spoke in a rather cool tone.

"Honey, your legs are trembling. Get back on the damn chair."

Masaomi´s eyebrows went up. Despite the endearment, the words were and order, one Louis was supposed to obey or else.

"Good morning, Kaz," the redhead replied. He continued cutting.

Kazuhiko stepped into the room, not realizing Masaomi was there. He went to lean against the sink and watched as the reddish hair fell into the sink. "The chair," he repeated.

"I´m fine."

"Your legs are shaking. I can see beads on your skin, and they´re not water. If you want to cut your hair it´s fine, but sit down. You are hurting yourself."

"I´m almost finished."

"Asahina Louis, listen to me." Kazuhiko reached out a hand and cupped his boyfriend´s chin. Annoyed mauve eyes met his. He smiled. Even angry, Louis was beautiful to him.

"Nobody wants you to go back to the hospital, less of all you. Don´t push your body. Sit down, honey. Please," he mumbled.

Louis´s forehead creased. They held each other´s gaze for a couple of seconds, then he sighed. "At least put some pillows in it so I can reach high enough and have a good view of myself in the mirror."

"Right away." Kazuhiko pecked his lips, grinned, then headed for the door. He froze mid-step upon seeing Masaomi.

"Oh. Masaomi-san. Good morning," he said, and felt as his cheeks turned red.

"Good morning, Kazuhiko-kun. Thank you for making Louis see the light. He hadn't been listening to me at all. It seems like his father doesn't have as much influence on him as before." The doctor motioned to the brunette. "Of course, given the way you look at Louis it´s no wonder he caves in." Before either of the younger men could respond, Masaomi stepped out. "I´ll be right back with the pillows."

Once they were alone, a still blushing Kazuhiko turned back to Louis. The redhead hadn't stopped using the scissors nor the combs.

"You´ve turned into a mule, you know," the brunette complained with a sigh.

"I´m tired of being treated like an invalid," Louis answered. "And trust me, being here yesterday was worse than the whole week at the hospital."

"Your brothers are taking care of you. Why is that so wrong?"

"It´s not wrong, it´s… overwhelming. It feels like whiplash, Kaz. Up until yesterday I hadn't seen nor had contact with anybody but Masaomi-nii-san, and now all of a sudden almost all of my brothers are acting like mother hens. It´s too much."

"So you´re trying to act out or something? But, I must say I´m surprised. When I left yesterday you seemed fine."

"Having you here made it all bearable, because when I was alone it felt like it went overboard." Louis peeked at the brunette from under his now-shortened bangs. "I´m depending on you way more than I should, aren't I?"

Kazuhiko shrugged. "Maybe. You know I don't mind, though. Will this be a temporary thing? Yes. Will you become your regular self when your leg heals and you talk this through with your therapist or somebody else? Yes, you´ll go back to normal. Will I be heartbroken when you stop needing me so much? Yes, but I´ll know I was there when you needed me the most, and that is enough for me," he said.

Louis´s breath ran out in a soft gasp. He felt his own cheeks flare red. "I love you, Kaz," he whispered, half-hoping Kazuhiko wouldn't hear.

The brunette heard anyway. He smiled, fought the urge to hug Louis. "I love you too, honey," he murmured, his eyes showing what he felt. "Now why don't you finish cutting your hair so I can then ogle you because of how handsome you look while you tell me why you´re doing this in the first place?"

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Half an hour later, Louis was freshly showered, with a new haircut, back in the wheelchair and listening as Masaomi assigned today´s chores to all the brothers. Osoji was as important to the Asahina family as the rest of the New Year´s Eve traditions. It was a tough job to clean the apartments on one day, but it all got somewhat easier given there were more than ten people cleaning. Masaomi had the habit of planning a chart beforehand and on the morning of the 31st he gave everyone their duties. It varied from cleaning out the garden to vacuuming the first two floors to making all the laundry. Still, he made sure they all got the same amount of work to do.

This year, however, the brothers seemed to have more duties than usual, given Louis, Kaname and Fuuto weren't going to help, the first because he couldn't; the other two because they weren't even in the city. Natsume was bound to arrive in an hour, so he had been included in Masaomi´s chart.

While most of the Asahinas would be glad they´d been relieved of their Osoji duties, Louis was uncomfortable. He felt he was being babied, and said as much when it was only him, Kazuhiko and Masaomi left in the living room.

The doctor chuckled. "You feel like you´re being babied? Well, Louis, that´s because you are. I figured you´d want to help so I had given you some easy work to do, but the twins and Wataru and pretty much all our brothers came to me one by one and told me 'Louis should focus on recovering. He needs to rest. I can take over his duties or him'."

The redhead was taken aback. "T-They… did?" he stuttered.

"Yes." Masaomi smiled. "You´re loved, Louis, you should know by now."

Mauve eyes darted to Kazuhiko, who gave him a wink. He found a slight smile curving his lips. "I don't want to be here all day doing nothing, Masaomi-nii-san."

"You won´t," Masaomi said smoothly. "You might not be able to help around here, but you´re capable of going out to get the incense sticks for the hatsumode and getting what Ukyo needs for the soba."

The redhead brightened. "Am I allowed outside?"

"If Kazuhiko-kun drives you, I don't see why you can´t take over my usual duties for today while I help out here. It´s something to do, isn't it?"

Louis turned a hopeful expression to his boyfriend, who barked a laugh. "Tell me where we´re supposed to go and I´ll take you there," Kazuhiko said.

"Thank you, Kaz, thank you very much!" Louis grabbed the railings on the chair and began wheeling towards the kitchen. "Let me go ask Ukyo-nii-san for the list and then we can go."

Masaomi let him go. As soon as he was alone with the brunette he said, "Thank you for being here for him, Kazuhiko-kun, and for reeling him in."

"To tell you the truth, I´m surprised he´s listening to me, Masaomi-san. With you around, I thought…"

"So did I, but he is still reluctant to take back the family, and he isn't yet fully comfortable being here. Plus, you having taken care of him for a full week seems to have softened him up and made him more… attuned to you."

"Is it temporary? All this shyness and insecurity and… dependence."

"I believe so. He needs time to recover, emotionally speaking, and he finds your mere presence healing. He´s quite vulnerable right now, even if won´t admit it even to himself."

Kazuhiko nodded. "I´ll do my best for him."

"I know you will, and I thank you for it. Please take him out of the house until we´re done cleaning and putting up the decorations, make him feel like he´s helping. It´ll ease his mind and stop him from doing other rash things."

The brunette shifted. "Cutting his hair was kind of unexpected, not rash. I understand he did it as a sort of… lucky charm for the coming year."

Masaomi hummed. "Maybe so. Still, please try to brighten his day, and we will make sure to make this night a good one."

"Can I celebrate with you guys?"

"We wouldn't have it any other way. You are family now, as well."

Kazuhiko grinned. Louis wheeled back in, his eyes sparkling. "I got the list," he said.

The brunette stood. "Off we go then. See you later, Masaomi-san." He nodded to the doctor, grabbed the handles on the chair and headed for the elevator.

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There were kadomatsu everywhere: around the tree, in front of the glass doors, lining the flowers Iori planted outside the apartments and there were even some others inside the living room. Kazuhiko had also seen one in the elevator and there were a thousand on the fifth floor.

"These sprouted like mushrooms after the rain," Kazuhiko muttered, glancing down at the front of the apartments from behind the huge windows on the living room. It was well past two on the morning, almost two, but there were still people milling and celebrating outside. The streets were bright and busy. He could see it even from here.

"It happens every year. Everyone puts up at least five kadomatsu," Louis replied from where he was sitting on the couch and watching his boyfriend stare out the window.

"Your family may celebrate a western-themed Christmas but New Year is still a very traditional holiday for you, isn't it?"

"It´s the most important celebration of the year. It started when Masaomi-nii-san was about six or seven. From what I´ve heard, there was an elderly nanny taking care of the children who tried to cheer them up for New Year because it was the first time Miwa-san missed the holiday. She shared with the boys her own family´s traditions and well, they stuck."

"That´s awesome, and very sweet of Masaomi-san, though he does keep a tight rein so everything can get accomplished, doesn't he?" Kazuhiko asked, remembering how his day with the Asahina family had been.

After spending the morning and part of the afternoon downtown buying all the items Ukyo had listed and also just wheeling Louis around to take his mind off serious things, the two of them had returned home to find the apartments squeaky clean, the place decorated beautifully and half the family getting ready to take a bath.

Louis had explained to him that after they were done with the Osoji, Ukyo and some other brave brothers would pile into the kitchen to make the traditional soba they ate every New Year´s Eve. Meanwhile, the rest would groom themselves, since after they were done eating it was time for the visit to the shrine. The family would stay there until midnight or past, have a cup of tea and a snack somewhere and then return home to end the day.

It had been… easier and more peaceful than what Kazuhiko had expected. He´d had his guard up without his knowing the whole time, from the moment he and Louis returned home in the afternoon up to the point when Masaomi pulled him away from the group to assure him no one was going to bit him or Louis. Even the newly arrived Natsume was behaving himself, and since Ukyo and Subaru had kept their mouths shut most of the time, there was no reason for him to be so tense.

"You´re scaring Louis, making him think this is a plan to kill you both," Masaomi added, nodding to where the Asahina group was huddled at the entrance of the shrine.

Kazuhiko shifted. "I´m sorry, Masaomi-san, but after everything that´s happened I don't trust some of your brothers."

"Which is understandable. You may be quite a gentle man, Kazuhiko-kun, but you are not an idiot, and I´m not going to lie to you. There is a chance some of my brothers may fall into another whirl of stupidity. However, if it happens, you are not the only one who will protect Louis or you for that matter. Just look at Hikaru for instance."

"… You´ve got a point."

"I almost always do. Now, please relax and start getting used to our New Year´s Eve traditions. I have the feeling this will not be the one and only time you´ll be spending this day with us."

After that short conversation, which made him think he´d been talking to his sister, Kazuhiko did as he was told. He breathed I and out a couple of times before going back to where all the brothers were.

The visit to the Meiji shrine had been enjoyable from that point on. Kazuhiko was actually hoping he´d be there next year to celebrate with the Asahinas. Ema issues aside, they were very good company.

Speaking of Ema…

"Where is Ema? Where are Miwa-san and Rintarou-san? We spent the majority of the day here in the apartments, but I didn't see them around," Kazuhiko said, turning around and walking over to the couch to join Louis.

"According to Masaomi-nii-san, the three of them left for Kyoto this morning."

"… For Kyoto?"

"Yes. It appears neither she nor Ema felt uncomfortable staying here, and since Rintarou-san lives for the two of them…" Louis shrugged.

Kazuhiko frowned. "Oh yeah, sure. They didn't feel comfortable staying here," he muttered.

"I kind of regret Miwa-san´s leaving. Whatever I said at the hospital… well, I meant it but it´s not like I don't want to see her ever again. Ema on the other hand… is it wrong to be glad she´s gone?"

"After everything you´ve been through, it´s more than understandable."

The redhead pulled his good leg against his chest. He leaned his forehead against it and sighed.

Kazuhiko raised an eyebrow, then inched closer. He ran his hand through the short and beautiful hair "Is something wrong?"

The redhead was silent for a little while, then he said, "Not really."

"Louis…"

"Honest. I was just thinking it´s quite a shame to start the year without being able to talk to Ema like we´re civilized human being. Makes me wonder whether we´ll be able to do that again or not."

The brunette stopped his petting, frowned. "You have a fixation with today being the new year, don't you?"

"I think it´s a bad omen."

Kazuhiko sighed. He moved his hand from Louis´s hair to his cheek, then tugged until his brown eyes met the tired mauve ones.

"You said the same about your being in a chair, that if you started the year in it, it would mean you´d stay like that for the next twelve months," he began, "and you know what? You were right."

The redhead´s mouth dropped to the floor. "Huh?"

Kazuhiko gave a somber nod. "You were right," he repeated. "Because if you´d gotten up from the chair and had tried to walk or act like normal, you would have damaged your leg further, you would have required another, more serious surgery and chances are you wouldn't have been able to walk again. So yes, it could have ended in disaster… one you brought upon yourself."

Louis stared at him.

Kazuhiko sighed. "I don't know why you´ve gotten superstitious all of a sudden, but I think deep down you know these bad omens thing is silly."

"It´s not silly. Okay, maybe you were right about how getting out of the chair would have crippled me for good, but cutting my hair will help."

"Help what?"

Louis flinched. "It´ll help me put this situation behind me for good."

The brunette gave another sigh. "Isn´t it a bit too early to forget?"

"No. I want to forget as soon as possible. Now, Kaz. I don't want to have nightmares anymore, or to shy away from my own thoughts. I want to start over with my family… maybe even Ema, and not to feel sick whenever I hear someone say Fuuto´s name."

"How can you forget when you don't yet understand what it is you have to put behind?"

Louis gritted his teeth. "No," he said, voice hard.

"Louis…" Kazuhiko pushed at the redhead´s good leg, who stopped hugging it without a fight and nestled into his boyfriend´s embrace without a fight, though he stayed rigid and tense.

"No, Kaz, I refuse to think about it."

"If you don't face your own memories and thoughts you will keep feeling terrible, and you will have more nightmares. I´m no expert in psychology, but even I know the first stage of healing is coping with what happened."

"… Why hadn't you said anything before?"

"You hadn't gone into this irrational, superstitious fit before. Plus, I thought I was meddling enough just by playing nurse." Kazuhiko shrugged.

Louis didn't reply right away, only stayed where he was, his breathing slow and steady. After a couple of minutes he said, "I´ve felt like I´ve been bottling up things. I don't want to let them all out. I´ll… I´ll break if I do."

"You´re entitled to break down."

Louis balled his hands in Kazuhiko´s sweater, buried his nose in the crook of his neck. His breathing quickened. "Stop being so damn attentive. I can´t take it."

"Then don't. Just let it all out. You haven't felt your own pain, Louis, and I think not doing at the beginning of the year will be a mad omen."

The redhead let out a short and almost broken laugh. "Using my own words against me?" he said in a whisper, unable to raise his voice any further. His throat felt tight, his eyes stung. His hands were shaking. He was about to lose it, because Kazuhiko was right. He had to face the fact he´d been shot and had for some fleeting seconds believed he´d been about to die. He had to face the fact the whole incident had been caused by one of his brothers. He had to admit he almost hated Ema and Fuuto at the moment. If he never admitted those things, how was he supposed to fix all that was wrong? And how was he supposed to talk to a complete strange about what was going on in his head when he couldn't even talk to the man he loved?

He opened his mouth, and the babbling began.

"I hate this. I hate the nightmares; I hate the sickness I feel when someone names Fuuto. I hate thinking about Ema. I hate the hospital, the doctors, being there. I hate the stupid driver and the gun. Why? Why didn't he leave it in the car? Why did Fuuto provoke him? Why did I push him out of the way? Just… why?!"

The knot in his throat almost choked him after that. He couldn't utter another single word, and the tears fell. Louis felt angry with himself for crying, which merely ended in more tears soaking into Kazuhiko´s shirtmand his hands holding onto the brunette for dear life.

Louis had been right; he broke down.

Kazuhiko let him do it, even though his own heart seized seeing him in so much pain and not being able to do anything about it. He did the best he could: he held Louis in his arms, pressed soft kisses to his hair and waited. There was no other thing for him to do apart from waiting, letting the redhead get off his chest all he needed to let out.

He didn't know how long it was until Louis went limp in his arms. At first, the brunette thought he was about to speak, but soon enough he noticed the even breathing and realized Louis had fallen asleep.

Kazuhiko gave a lopsided smile. He brushed away some stray hairs from the redhead´s pale forehead and stared at his sleeping profile for another couple of minutes.

"You´re going to be fine. Everything is going to be fine," he murmured. "And your hair looks wonderful. It is also an omen, on how good this coming year will be for you."

He pressed one last kiss to Louis´s cheek before slowly and carefully disengaging his body from the redhead´s and standing up. Though things were much better at the Asahina household, he got the feeling falling asleep together on the couch would be pushing at the limits of everybody´s comfort.

He ambled towards the hall in search of a closet and a blanket. When he found one, he came back, accommodated Louis and threw it over him. With one last loving look, he flopped down on the other couch and curled into a corner with a blanket of his own. It wasn't like he was going to sleep in his boyfriend´s room without him there anyway.

..-'¨'-..-'¨'-..-'¨'-..-'¨'-..-'¨'-..-'¨'-..-'¨'-..-'¨'-..-'¨'-..-'¨'-..-'¨'-..

There were no missed calls nor any unread messages from any family member… or any person at all.

With a frown, Fuuto let his phone fall to his soft and plush hotel bed. He then hopped over to the huge window in his room and stared at the city outside. Despite the early hour, it was full of life. It was New Year in Tokyo, after all.

Because Fuuto hadn't left the city, despite what most of his family would have thought. No. Fuuto had gotten a room in the most luxurious hotel he could find on the other end of town and as far away from his family as he could, but he hadn't left the city. A teeny, tiny part of him had hoped at least one of his brothers would chose him over Louis and come looking for him, or at least call him so he could go back home. He´d thrown tantrums before, and up until now, his family had withstood them.

Apparently, getting an adoptive brother almost killed was a breaking point. Go figure.

Still, was everyone so mad they couldn't even send him a shitty and cliché text wishing him a Happy New Year? Not even his mother or Ema? What was wrong with those two? Louis should be as angry with Ema as he should be with him. And Miwa… who would want to see that woman anyway? Was she even in Japan anymore? Even with the little knowledge Fuuto had on her, he figured Miwa had left the country and even the continent by now.

Fuuto clicked his tongue, walked back to his bed and laid down. He picked up his phone and stared at the unlit screen.

"It´s not like it matters. Who the hell needs family?" he muttered, trying to hide the tiny spark of pain he felt at spending such an important holiday alone. As far as he could remember, December the 31st – or make that January he 1st – had been family holidays, days to spend with his brothers annoying Yuusuke, fighting Hikaru, rolling his eyes at whatever Masaomi and Ukyo said and destroying the kotatsu the others put all around the house.

Oh, who was he kidding? He missed being home with his family.

Mad at himself for his own sentimentalism, Fuuto let out a growl and squeezed his phone as hard as he could. He was about to lunge it at the wall, already thinking what new model he could buy, when the screen lit up.

It was a message.

From Ema.

"Well, well, well," Fuuto almost purred, sitting up in bed and opening up the message. "What have we got here, nee-san?"

To be continued…

Hello! *pokes her head around the corner* OMG It´s been so long since I last updated, I know you all want to kill me, so feel free to do it… XD

I have so much to say, but if I do it´ll be like two full pages of author notes, so let´s just say this: PLEASE FORGIVE ME FOR NOT UPDATING BEFORE! I´m sorry. ToT I do hope you all enjoy this chapter and that you keep up with the story. I don't know how long it´ll take, but I will finish it. I SWEAR

Also, 200 reviews! Thank you, thank you, thank, thank you all so much! I never thought it´d made it this far. Really, you guys have no idea how grateful and happy I am. Thanks for the support on the story, and I´m glad you´ve enjoyed it up to now. :3 For you guys I´ll keep the chapters coming, I already promised. ;)

P.S. I did do my research on Japanese New Year´s traditions and also how to cope after an accident. My apologies if Louis seemed terribly OOC in this chapter and about his hair… we both wanted a new look for him and that seemed like the sanest reason to do it. Also, Renavelia, it´s awesome to have you back! And Tuliharja, Kazuhiko ended up falling from the tree LOL.