Uh... Major fluff warning! Not Sargent Fluff, Major Fluff!

Also, still don't own anything.

Caleo

"Leo?" Calypso shouted into the opening of bunker nine. Her voice echoed through the cavern, but there was no response.

She sighed and marched toward the hammock hung in the corner. She and Piper had put it there after the seventh time Leo fell asleep while working on one of his projects. Now, whenever he fell asleep, Festus would just put him in the hammock and throw a blanket over him.

Sure enough, there he was. Curled up under a blueprint—Festus was still a little unclear on what qualified as a blanket—and snuggling with a machine, sporting the customary grease smudge on his cheek.

"Leo," she called gently, "Leo, wake up, it's almost noon."

"But I don't wanna!" He groaned.

"How late were you up last night?"

"Does five still count as late, or does it switch to being early?"

"Get up!" She ordered, grabbing the hammock and pulling, so he fell on to the ground.

"Dumped on Valentine's Day," he jumped up, awake and smily as ever, "harsh."

She rolled her eyes and handed him a large bag. He looked inside cautiously.

"Are these all valentines?"

"Yes."

"For me?"

"Yes."

"Why?" He asked, then muttered something that sounded strangely like 'all da ladies luv Leo'.

"So that you can win."

"What?" These answers were just making him more confused.

"I was told that whoever gets the most valentines wins."

"And who told you this?"

"A very knowledgable five year-old."

He blinked several times, processing what she just said. "That's not what Valentine's Day is about."

"Then what is it about, oh wise one?"

"It's about showing the people you love that you care about them."

"You mortals only have one day out of the whole year for that? That's silly."

He grinned and pulled her into a kiss, "but it gives us an excuse to make big romantic gestures."

"You do those anyway. Last week, you wrote my name in the sky with a heart around in giant letters made of fire."

"Oh," he thought for a while, "give each other cheesy cards then!"

"In that case," she shuffled through her bag, then pulled out a plain piece of notebook paper on it, "here."

As he read it a grin spread across his face, getting wider and wider with every word.

Today, people usually give each other cute cards with compliments.

Instead I made a list of complaints:

1. Honestly, you are too cute. I can't hold any of the stupid things you do against you whenever you make that pouty face. It really isn't fair.

2. I'm addicted to your kisses. The more I have, the more I want. It's a vicious cycle.

3. You distract me. Whenever I start thinking about you, I get distracted and forget what I'm supposed to be doing. It's very annoying.

4. You make me look like an idiot. Whenever I'm around you, I can't stop smiling; it makes people question my intelligence if I just keep grinning no matter what happens.

5. You make my stomach hurt. You keep telling jokes and doing silly things that make me laugh until my stomach aches and I can't breath.

6. You make me a hazard. Sometimes when I'm daydreaming about you, I'll walk into a wall or off a cliff. It's very dangerous.

7. You're so annoying. You do stupid romantic things and call me silly nicknames and get yourself into trouble just to impress me.

8. You'll give me heart attack someday. Whenever you touch me, my heart beats so fast, I'm sure it will burst one of these days.

9. I'm afraid you'll give me cavities. You're just so sweet.

10. I don't think I can feel any more emotions. My heart's so busy loving you.

I don't what I did to deserve someone as special as you, but happy Valentine's Day.

He read it a few more times, until his face started hurting from grinning so wide for so long.

"Well?" Calypso asked nervously, twisting a strand of her hair.

"This is my favorite piece of paper in all of the multiverses! You are incredible! You are perfect! Incredibly perfect! Perfectly incredible!"

She laughed, "you certainly have a way with words, Mr Valdez."

"You know it, sunshine!"

"I hate it when you call me that."

"I know you mean love!"

She rolled her eyes, "do you have something for me?" She asked expectantly.

"Yes! Yes, I do! Somewhere..." He started running around, thoroughly searching the bunker by throwing everything onto the ground without looking at it.

"Would it be the bright red card on the table. The one that's surrounded by sticky notes that say 'give to Calypso on Saturday'?"

He froze and looked at the tabes directly in front of him. "That's it!"

"I swear, you'd lose your head if weren't so well attached."

"I'm very grateful for the little things like that in life."

He handed her the card, which she opened and immediately dropped when it started singing 'I'm Sexy and I Know It'.

"Leo Valdez!" She shouted, even though she was right next to him.

"That's me, the deafened one and only."

It's a good thing there's an unlimited supply of eyerolls in the world, otherwise, she'd use them all in just one week.

"Sorry, next time I'll put a warning on the singing card, 'warning: this card sings'."

"I put annoying on that list of complaints, right?"

"Oh! I have another thing!"

"Not more exploding waffles, I think you've already traumatized Percy enough."

"No!" He pushed a box of waffle mix under the table with his foot. "I know how you mentioned missing the sound of Ogygia at night, so," he grabbed the machine he'd been snuggling with and fiddled with a few knobs, "I made this!"

He grandly flipped the on switch. The bunker was filled with the sound of rustling leaves, chirping crickets, a crackling fire, and the distant murmur of waves.

Her eyes shone with tears, "oh, Leo!"

"Do you like it?"

"I know you mean love."

They smiled and kissed.

They spent the rest of day amusing themselves by sneaking up behind couples who were about to kiss and opening the 'I'm Sexy and I Know It' card.

Yay! Fluff! Caleo fluff!

Also, if anyone can explain to me how to write a kissing scene that doesn't sound creepy, awkward, or perverted (totally unrelated side note: my spell check just changed perverted to 'elf regarded') please tell me! Please! I'll give you cookies!

Tell me who you want to see next! Reviewers get exploding waffles! ...that could be very dangerous... Reviewer get to be sexy and know it! ...that just sounds weird... Love penguins, anyone? Your choice!

—XOXO your friendly neighborhood kumquat