Disclaimer: I claim no rights to the characters of Shingeki no Kyojin.

Warnings: slash, VERY explicit content, shameless fluff

Just to warn you all, I've changed my penname from Yukikoneko1990 to MissYuki1990. I've gone under my old penname for a long time, and I thought it was time to change it. :D

Rare are times when they can just relax. More often than not, the only thing they manage to do is exchange a few heated kisses in alcoves and dark alleys, hiding in shadows from noisy colleagues.

But still - every once in a while - they would get a moment of peace, nights when they would find themselves alone, safe within the silence of Levi's chambers, with fire crackling in the fireplace, its warmth seeping into their bodies, empty cups of tea resting forgotten on the tea-table between two comfortable armchairs.

On such nights, they would lock the door and pull the drapes shut to shield them from the outside world, allowing themselves to forget for a short amount of time that their lives could end tomorrow on a whim of whatever higher power there was.

On nights such as those, there would be no hurried kisses, no rushing to get their clothes off; no urging to find release. On nights such as those, there would only be the two of them and this thing between them – this thing neither dared call love because the thought of losing the other would become unbearable if they ever admitted it out loud.

This was such a night, and the air between them was heavy. There seemed to be some sort of tension between them, like a string being pulled on both ends, waiting to snap.

Erwin sat in the chair at Levi's work-desk, shadows swirling in blue eyes speaking volumes of hidden feelings. He had discarded most of his uniform hours ago, preferring to be as relaxed as he could be, remaining only in his shirt and trousers, bare feet buried in the thick rug adorning the floor of the room.

Erwin's gaze hasn't left Levi's form ever since this strained silence settled between them, the younger man standing in front of the fireplace, his back turned on Erwin. Levi's right hand was braced on the mantelpiece, small shoulders hunched, left hand fisted in the collar of his shirt, similarly dressed as Erwin.

The fire bathed Levi in some kind of mysterious glow, and even though Erwin couldn't see those silver eyes, he knew that they had long lost the usual sharpness, becoming instead warm and open the moment the key was turned in the lock.

This was the sight Erwin was certain only he has ever seen, and that simple fact brought a small smile on his face. It had taken a long time to earn Levi's respect, and even longer to earn his affections, concealed as they were.

He was the only one to see Levi discard all masks and shields, the only one to see him come undone by pleasure and need, the only one to see those unique eyes darkening with desire, blunt teeth biting into a lush bottom lip as usually pale cheeks tinted with a light blush.

He was the only one to see that lean, muscled body arching up in throes of passion, hard muscles rippling under taunt skin glimmering with drops of sweat, the only one to caress it, to adore it, to mark it with his teeth and burn it with his touch.

He knew every single perfect imperfection of Levi's slight form, knew the true strength belied by the small stature and fragile looking limbs. He knew what Levi hid under layers of his uniform, and even though he would never say it, even though neither of them would ever admit aloud what they truly felt for one another, knowing that there was no one else out there who knew Levi to the core was enough to Erwin.

"I don't like this, Erwin." The commander woke from his musings when Levi voiced his thoughts, the tense atmosphere growing thicker in substance.

"We have little choice," Erwin answered as he stood up, coming to stand just a few steps behind Levi, his movements almost too quiet to be heard. "Eren is possibly our only chance to find a way to defeat the Titans once and for all."

The soft snort which came as an answer to Erwin's words made the corner of his lips tilt up for the smallest of fragments, and he walked over to Levi as the younger man straightened, crossing his arms over his chest as Erwin came to stand right behind him, big hands settling on slim hips and full lips pressing against the crown of Levi's head in a lingering kiss.

"Do you not trust my judgment?" Erwin asked, nuzzling his nose into soft, raven strands, flattening his body with Levi's and making the younger man feel the straining hardness of Erwin's need against the small of his back.

"You know I do," Levi answered, leaning back against Erwin, and the commander needed only to glance over Levi's shoulder to see that he wasn't as unaffected by Erwin's closeness as it might have seemed, the growing bulge in the front of Levi's trousers proving his arousal. "It's everyone else I doubt."

"They will come around," Erwin spoke as he lightly took the tip of one slowly reddening ear between his lips, spreading his fingers over thin hips, thumbs hooking in the loops of Levi's trousers. "We know that Eren can be trusted. We know his heart is in the right place. He will learn control, and he will prove to be an invaluable asset to us."

"And what if he doesn't?" Levi countered, thin eyebrows narrowing in a thoughtful, worry-filled frown. "What if he loses control?"

Erwin was quiet for a long moment, his hands sliding over Levi's stomach as he wrapped his arms around the smaller man and pulled him closer, ducking his head lower to nuzzle the tip of his nose behind Levi's ear, the younger man tilting his head to the side.

"Then you'll kill him," Erwin stated calmly, although Levi knew he was everything but. Saying those words came harder to Erwin than anyone could imagine, although many thought he felt nothing when giving such orders, "And we will find another way to achieve freedom."

Levi sighed, a shiver passing over his body when Erwin slid his hands down his lover's stomach purposefully avoiding the younger man's straining need as he pressed against slim hips and rolled his own.

"Come here," Erwin spoke in a quiet murmur, placing his hands on Levi's arms and leading the smaller man over to the bed. The Commander took a seat on it, tugging Levi into his lap, and a soft hum escaped thin, pale lips as Levi relaxed into Erwin's hold, strong, muscled arms wrapping around his smaller frame.

Levi rested his head back on Erwin's right shoulder, unfocused gaze pointed at the ceiling, thousands of thoughts running through his mind although he could hardly concentrate.

"Stop thinking," Erwin muttered, mouthing on the pale neck, knowing better than to leave a mark where it could be easily sighted. He stopped his ministrations when Levi tilted his head towards him and pressed an uncharacteristically tender kiss into Erwin's brow.

Erwin raised his head, darkened blues meeting dilated silver orbs, and something churned in his guts when a small smirk tilted those thin lips belonging to him and him alone.

"Make me," Levi answered in a coarse voice, and Erwin licked his lips, excitement sparking to life within him.

"With pleasure," Erwin murmured as Levi raised his left hand, entangling his fingers in short, blond strands, pulling Erwin into a kiss. Strong hands slid up Levi's stomach, deftly unbuttoning the grey, cotton shirt, revealing pale skin.

Levi tilted his head back, eyes slipping closed as Erwin traced the sharp line of his lover's chin with his lips, lightly nipping down the jugular vein, pulling Levi's shirt open with his left hand, his right slipping lower and popping the buttons of Levi's trousers out of their holes.

Levi gasped and his whole body tensed up when Erwin pushed his hands into Levi's trousers, the younger man's fingers digging into Erwin's hand, and the commander bit into the junction of Levi's shoulder.

Wave after wave of warmth washed over them, and Erwin managed to unbutton the rest of Levi's shirt, spreading his hands flat on the hard planes of Levi's stomach, feeling hard muscles rippling as Levi rolled his hips back, feeling Erwin's hard sex pressed against his ass.

Erwin slid his left hand up, passing over one hardened nipple with his thumb, thrilling at the choked up grunt which escaped Levi, repeating the action as he pushed his right hand into Levi's trousers, palming the hard length, causing Levi to gasp for air.

"Come here," Erwin muttered as he let go of his lover, wrapping his left hand around Levi's right wrist and tugging on it. Levi slipped out of Erwin's lap and climbed the bed, kneeling in front of his older lover, watching with dilated eyes as Erwin almost reverently unbuttoned Levi's sleeves before taking hold of the collar of the shirt and slipping it off.

The shirt fell to the floor with a hardly audible flutter, their gazes remaining connected as Erwin took hold of both trousers and briefs, slipping them down slim hips. Levi leaned back on his hands, fisting them in chilly, cotton covers, straightening his legs for Erwin to slip the clothes off of them.

Silver eyes followed every Erwin's move, the owner of those steel-like orbs climbing his knees, minutely trembling hands reaching out to help Erwin out of his clothes. The moments seemed to drag on forever, the fire having long turned to embers allowing comforting darkness to settle over the room, dim light outlining two bodies yearning for the other's warmth.

Erwin stepped out of his trousers and briefs when they folded around his feet, climbing on the bed and reaching over to the nightstand to take the glass bottle of scentless oil Levi placed there earlier.

Small, callused hands cupped Erwin's face, thin lips covering his as Levi straddled one muscled thigh, rolling his hips slowly as he nipped and kissed on his lover's succulent lips. He felt one warm, rough hand settle on the small of his back, his skin burning at the contact and goose-bumps spreading up his back.

Levi's eyes opened wide and a gasp passed his lips when oil-slick fingers teased the crack of his ass with a feather-light touch, a blush covering his cheeks, and he hid his face in Erwin's neck when one thick finger circled his entrance, squeezing his eyes tightly shut when a deep, breathless laugh resonated in Erwin's chest.

"It still amazes me how sensitive you are," Erwin teased lightly, pressing against the tight ring of muscle with two fingers, but not breaching it, the abrupt jab of Levi's hips making Erwin's hard length rub against his lover's thigh, pearly drops of pre-come smearing over pale skin.

"Shut up," Levi pressed out through clenched teeth, something between a grunt and a moan escaping him as he arched into Erwin, blunt nails digging into the muscles of Erwin's forearms.

Knowing better than to tease Levi too much, Erwin placed a tender kiss on his lover's shoulder, pushing one finger inside the tight, welcoming heat.

After three years of holding this body Erwin knew every single weak spot.

He knew every single sound that would spill off of Levi's lips, he knew what would make his whole body coil, what would make him arch into Erwin's touch. He knew how to bring Levi to the edge of absolute pleasure, how to keep him dangling there until he'd come tumbling down, ending up a pile of content and bliss.

Levi muffled a startled moan by biting into Erwin's shoulder when the commander curled his finger just right, sending a surge of burning pleasure over Levi's body, the soul-searing fire settling in the pit of Levi's stomach. He gasped and rested his forehead where he earlier bit, feeling another finger breaching his body, moving in and out of him in an agonizingly slow pace.

Erwin swallowed thickly, stomping down on the burning need to just take Levi then and there, concentrating on the way his smaller, albeit much stronger lover, rocked back on his fingers, deceptively delicate hands keeping a strong hold of Erwin's forearms, making the commander thank the gods that he didn't bruise easily otherwise he would have to conceal his arms for a long time.

Feeling the tight channel relaxing around his fingers, Erwin added another one, and he closed his eyes and bit the inside of his lips at the sound of a breathless mewl, muffled as it was, passing Levi's lips.

"Erwin… Erwin, please…"

"Damn it," Erwin cursed under his breath, pulling his fingers out of his lover's stretched hole, but before he could move, small hands settled on Erwin's chest and pushed him back. The commander fell on the bed, eyes widening as Levi straddled him, looking down at Erwin with eyes resembling a solar eclipse.

Levi placed his hands flat on Erwin's chest and rose to his knees, the commander having enough consciousness left to reach behind Levi and smear what oil remained on his right hand over his neglected member, leading it to Levi's entrance as the raven-haired man moved back.

Both held their breaths, hearts beating that much faster, and Erwin grabbed a firm hold of Levi's hips when he was completely sheathed within the constricting heat of his lover's body.

Not remembering when he closed them, Levi opened his eyes, looking down into dilated blue orbs, feeling as though a hand grabbed his heart when he saw them staring at him with open worry and such tenderness and love that he regretted looking into them.

"Levi…"

"Don't," he cut Erwin off, ducking his head as he bowed forward, hands slipping down Erwin's shoulders to fist in the covers. A shiver wrecked Levi's body when Erwin wrapped his arms around him, burying his nose in Levi's hair, head tucked under Erwin's chin. "We swore never to say it, remember?"

"I know," Erwin muttered, tightening his hold on Levi for a second.

"Then why…"

"Because I can't help it," Erwin interjected and Levi froze up. "I won't say it," Erwin whispered and pressed a kiss into sweat-mated black strands, dragging his hands down Levi's back to his hips, tracing circles in damp skin, "but that doesn't mean that I don't feel it. And it doesn't mean I'll stop feeling it."

Levi slowly raised himself, hands fisting on Erwin's shoulders, and humanity's strongest swallowed thickly at the sight of a loving smile decorating the older man's face. After staring at him for a couple of long minutes Levi huffed and shook his head, cupping Erwin's face between his hands and pressing his lips against his lover's.

"You're an idiot," Levi mouthed against Erwin's lips, voice hardly louder than a summer breeze, but Erwin heard him, his heart clenching because he knew that this was the closest thing to a love confession he would get from Levi for as long as they both would live.

Instead of answering with words, Erwin grabbed a hold of Levi's ass and jabbed his hips up. Levi choked up, eyes widening and lips falling open, crumbling onto Erwin's chest, fumbling for a moment to brace his hands somewhere.

Erwin planted his feet firmly into the mattress, keeping a hard, quick rhythm, feeling the tightening of his lover's warmth, hearing the breathless gasps passing parted lips. Levi could do nothing but let Erwin have his way, his body overwhelmed with pleasure. Within a second, Levi found himself on his back, wrapping his legs around Erwin's waist on pure instinct, blunt nails digging into the hard, flexing muscles of Erwin's shoulders.

Erwin braced his weight on his left hand, fisting it in the rumpled covers, and he wrapped his right hand around Levi's neglected member, pumping it in time with frantic, abrupt jabs of his hips.

Levi's hands fell from Erwin's shoulders, fisting in the covers above his head as he arched into his lover, meeting him thrust for thrust, cheeks flushing bright red, eyes tightly closed, struggling to breathe in enough air for his starving lungs.

It was enough for Erwin to lightly push his thumb against the slit of Levi's weeping member, and within seconds he was watching his stunning lover arching off of the bed and into Erwin, every muscle in that strong body coiling, pearly white strings of come spilling over Erwin's hand.

Erwin managed a few more thrusts before he followed Levi over the edge, barely managing to catch himself on both hands before he could crush his smaller lover by collapsing on top of him.

Breathing as though he would never get enough air again, Erwin closed his eyes and ducked his head, just like always feeling the emotions he was suppressing for quite some time now wanting to bubble up, the need to speak up becoming so strong that he had to bite the inside of his lips, every muscle in his body tensing up with his efforts.

It all stopped – the whole agony of silence stopped – when two trembling hands cupped his face and raised his head, a pair of silver eyes staring up at him, lips he adored thinning in a pained line.

"I do, you know?" Levi managed to press out, voice tight and raspy, and Erwin's eyes widened, air hitching in his throat, and then he breathed out, relief such as he never felt washing over him, and he framed Levi's head with his forearms, pressing his lips against Levi's in a tender, loving kiss before he rested his forehead on his lover's.

"I do too…"

cut

Ask me why I refused to watch Shingeki No Kyojin before? I DARE you to ask me… The amount of feels these two give me. And it's all because of OriSor! You can find the link that inspired this story on my Archive account under the new penname as well since Fan Fiction's still being bitchy about links to other pages. AND you can come talk to me on that blue blogging site. My URL is missyuki1990.

I hope you've liked it!