Tears 01.12.17

Note: Hey, guys! Bet you all thought I forgot about this. College life has been off to a stressful start, so I've been neglecting my writing to deal with it. Nonetheless, I will continue to update as I can. This semester has been a lot easier so far so I'll do my best. Happy (very late) New Years and Happy (early) Valentine's, everyone!

This short takes place following The Big S.T.A.N.K.

— § —

Skipper held pressed his flippers to his temples as the stress of the situation skyrocketed. Why couldn't it just end?

Kowalski leaned closer to Private. "Betcha five bucks he won't last another minute."

Private thought for a second. "I'd take that bet if I didn't believe that."

Julien continued laughing, doubling over from the pain in his side. "Big blubbery baby Skippy! Do you need a pacie? Hahaha!"

Skipper grunted angrily. "Ringtail, I swear to all that is good and fishy, if you don't shut up, I will personally build another S.T.A.N.K. just for you and I will not save you from it!"

"Hahaha," Julien laughed, "look how he threatens me. He's so cute!"

"Ringtail!" Skipper snapped.

"It's okay!" Julien insisted. "I am still cuter." He giggled. "Baby."

"Manly tears, Ringtail!"

"Big. Blubbery. Baby," Julien repeated, folding his arms over his chest, a cocky sideways smile on his face.

With a frustrated grunt, Skipper prepared to advance, but Kowalski stepped in between them. "Okay," he said loudly, "looks like it's time to turn in. Been a very long day. We will see you all in the morning." He dragged Skipper toward the hatch.

"Okay," Julien said, Maurice tugging on his arm, "make sure the bossy penguin wraps a towel around his pillow so he doesn't get it wet tonight!"

Before Skipper could say or do anything, Rico and Private tackled him into the hatch. Kowalski sighed heavily before jumping in after, closing the fishbowl over the hole.

Skipper clenched his fists. "There's gonna be one less lemur in this zoo."

Kowalski pulled out his clipboard and started to write something.

"What are you doing?" Skipper demanded.

"Oh, I'm just tallying how many times you've said that this year," Kowalski said.

"What?" Skipper snapped. "When did you start doing that?"

Kowalski counted up the standing tally. "Four hundred seventy-six times ago," he answered.

Skipper narrowed his eyes. "Well, one of these times I'm gonna make that happen."

"Oh, Skipper," Private chimed in. "We all know that's not true."

"Uh-huh!" Rico agreed.

"You know you would never be able to go through with it," Kowalski said, stashing his clipboard and pencil away.

Skipper exhaled.

"Plus you know deep down you would miss him if he was gone," Private added, folding his flippers.

"Whoa, now," Skipper replied quickly, holding up his flippers, "saying I couldn't go through with it is one thing, but I would never miss that over glorified product tester for Avon."

"How long have you been waiting to use that one?" Kowalski asked, staring at him through half-lidded eyes.

Skipper folded his flippers. "Too long."

"But, Skipper," Private started, "if you really wouldn't miss Julien if he were gone, what were you crying about?"

"I was not crying!" Skipper insisted again. "I was upset because of all the ways to go, of all to people to go with . . ."

"Uh-huh," Private replied, "and not a shred of sadness that you thought you failed at saving him?"

"Not even a sliver," Skipper persisted. "I only did that to a) save Central Park and New York from the S.T.A.N.K. and b) because Ringtail's whining was getting on my nerves."

The other penguins exchanged a look.

"It's settled then," Skipper said before any of them could respond. "Lights out, men."

Deciding it best to drop it, the penguins prepared to turn in. A few minutes after being in bed, a voice broke into the silent darkness.

"Skipper?"

A sigh followed. "Yes, Private?"

"Under what circumstances does a tear become manly?" he asked.

Silence followed for about thirty seconds before, "When they're mine, Private. Now go to sleep."

[Words: 610]