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Summary: A new year, alone. A new year, without her. RollinsBrie, set after 12/29/14 RAW, oneshot

Let's start out the year with an angsty Bellins Mode oneshot, shall we? Clarembees inspired me with her RollinsBrie centered around the events of this particular RAW, and I was going to just do my little spin of the events after everything went down. And I wanted to write another RollinsBrie fic and they are just so angsty and wonderful. I am going to attempt to do a cute and fluffy little thing for them at some point, but this idea wouldn't leave me. I hope y'all enjoy!

You Are Missing From Me

The crisp air is a shock to his system as he steps onto the balcony, stem of his champagne glass in one hand, the length of his tie in the other. He moves his hand up and loosens the offending item, giving himself much needed freedom from the suffocating piece of clothing. He takes a swig from the lightly bubbling liquid, but it does nothing to lighten his thoughts.

Cheers echo from inside the presidential suite belonging to Hunter Hearst Helmsley and Stephanie McMahon. The plan to bring back The Authority had worked flawlessly, with Seth Rollins himself being the linchpin bringing everything together to return order to the WWE.

A splendid new year, indeed.

Seth feels as if he should be happy. He moved up within the ranks of The Authority after Randy's betrayal. He was now their Plan A, he felt, in terms of things. Higher up than Big Show (because, how couldn't he be?), higher up than anyone. The Golden Boy. Mr. Money In The Bank. The Architect of the most dominant faction in recent memory. He had created brilliance with his own two hands. He had created and destroyed it in one foul swoop. He had joined sides with the power of The Authority and it has all been uphill from there.

But, really, he doesn't want them to know he sees Dean's shocked expression behind his lids almost daily, doesn't want them to know he hears Roman's painful grunt as he crumples to the mat after the chair shot heard 'round the world...

Most of all, he doesn't want anyone to know how one girl's opinion of him continues to rock his world, despite himself.

He still remembers her face, constricted with emotion after the night he betrayed his so-called "brothers." Remembers how hurt she had looked, as if she had been the one taking the chair shots.

"How could you do that to family?" she had accused. "How could you do that to people you love?"

He had pursed his lips. "You wouldn't understand."

"No," she had replied, her eyes sad and defeated and looking older than all her years. "No, I wouldn't."

Even now, he remembers her as she looked then - her eyes so fierce and determined, her shoulders set, her fists clenched at her sides as if fighting with herself as well as him. He had wanted to take her in his arms and tell her it was better this way, but if he knew her, really, then he knew that was the last thing she wanted. In fact, in that moment, he would be surprised if she would ever want him to touch her again.

And she hadn't.

Seth breathes out, watching the mist form in front of his face as his breath hit the cool air. Fighting a shiver, he closes his eyes and drinks deeply from the glass in his hand, downing the whole thing in just a few seconds. Faintly, he thinks, Dean would be proud, and the accompanying pain that shoots through his heart is promptly stamped down, tied up, put away to the farthest corners of his mind where it cannot hurt him anymore.

Or so he tells himself each time it happens.

It's the same with her, really. Each time he thinks of her, he tries to fight with that emotion, tries to keep it at bay like he does with so many others - Dean and Roman and everyone else he has hurt in his desperate bid to stay on top - but he finds himself coming up short each and every time. Remembering her is the sweetest kind of pain, the sweetest and the most devastating at the same time.

Behind him, he hears the door open and the familiar, crowing, "Hello, everyone!" of Nikki Bella. Of course she'd be here, at The Authority's big shindig to welcome in the new year as well as their new rule over WWE. His shoulders stiffen and he feels the urge to turn around, just to see...maybe, just maybe...

Seth lets his curiosity get the better of him and turns around. He is greeted with the sight of just one Bella, her buxom frame in a skin-tight red dress that accentuates every curve. Any fool would find her attractive, even he, but he can't help but think of her sister, the sister who wears flowy dresses and plaid and boots and constantly smells of earth and life.

Her sister is not with her.

Seth tries not to pay too much attention to Nikki, but he finds that he can't help himself. He can't help but watch her and draw comparisons to her twin. It's pathetic, he knows, and yet he can't stop himself from doing it. He turns away just as she wraps her thin arms around Stephanie's neck, clearly happy to have her back.

He inhales sharply, the cold air stinging his lungs - Seth holds his breath in, as if the horrid feeling would help erase other horrid feelings, but to no avail.

Brie...

The name is a shock to his system when he realizes he hasn't referred to her by name in so long. He leans forward and rests his forearms on the beautiful white rails of the balcony. "Stupid," he murmurs to himself.

"You talking about your hair, Rollins? It's about time you realized it."

Seth stiffens; Nikki Bella is much stealthier than he had given her credit for. "What do you want, Pamela Anderson?"

Although he's not looking at her, he knows she's probably puffed out her chest and crossed her arms out of indignation. "You're a difficult person to like, Seth."

His lips curl. "Yeah, so I've been told."

Nikki lets out a breath that he can almost feel on the back of his neck. She's closer than he realized, but he doesn't want to turn around, doesn't want to see the ghost of her sister reflected in her brown eyes and dark hair - not dark enough, though, her's is darker...

"Brie doesn't think so," her voice is soft, so soft that he might as well have not heard it.

And in that moment, it seems as if his heart has ceased to beat.

Seth has to turn around at that. It's so ridiculous, so completely insane, that he has to look Nikki in the eye as he laughs at her. "Listen, I know you are her sister, and you know everything about her, but she hates me. Clearly. I don't..."

"Oh, please," Nikki says, her voice dripping with sarcasm. "She's good at hiding it, but Brie's miserable. She loves you; stop trying to downplay your importance to her."

The two are quiet for a moment, before Nikki continues quietly, "It's five minutes until midnight. Don't let the new year start without her."

The busty woman doesn't let him fight, doesn't let him reply, only turns on a pencil-thin heel and makes her way back inside. Seth is stunned for a moment at her perceptiveness, but that is only a fleeting thing before he realizes he's smiling.

Even more surprising is the fact that his phone is in his hand, his thumb dialing the number he's had memorized ever since he knew her.

Her voice mail picks up - and, it's a small thing, a stupid thing, but he misses hearing her speak to him without malice and relishes this moment, even if it is just a recording.

The beep sounds, and the first words he says are the ones he should have said a long time ago.

"I love you. I'm sorry."

End.