HELLO! Oh it feels good to be back! Have you missed me? So, this will be back on, but instead of every Saturday, it will be every other Saturday! And today I felt very fanfiction-y so I have updated everything! Please review!

Reviewers:

Chaos Supernova: Yep, Deadpool is indeed the 14th Doctor. But he won't admit to it. XD. I am so sorry for the million year wait! But I hope you still like the story! And the same goes for As You Wish. Enjoy!

CuteNinja25: I know it wasn't my best, but thanks for reading and reviewing! I hope this chapter can make up for it!

IronFistRocks: I know right! That's pretty much why like, 25 percent of these chapters are about him!

liv lokigirl: Thanks! I have seen the real trailer and I'm super excited for the movie! Sorry for not updating but I'll be back on schedule now! Every other Saturday!

CHBNewRomeHogwartsBerk: Thanks so much! Deadpool has officially added "Amazingest" to the dictionary and un-alived the heck out of autocorrect! I hope you like this chapter and I love your username too!

Superior Goblin: I know it took a million years, but I'm finally going to update again! Yay! It makes my day that your a fan, and I've included Lizard in this chapter! The dance off thing sounds cool, but I have quite a few requests backed up, so it may or may not happen. And yes, I do have an extreme crush on Danny, but I've been getting obsessed over Newt from the Maze Runner too, so Danny has some competition.

Chapter 34: Toddlers and Tiara's Villain Style

"Hello and welcome to this year's annual Villain Pageant!" The announcer blares.

"This year's contestants are, the Lizard, Pile Driver, and Sandman!"

The crowd cheers. Behind the frilly curtains, the contestants wait with their coaches.

"Okay, Lizzie Lizardkins, you're gonna go out there and show these ugly villains who's the top princess! You're gonna go out there and shake what your mamma gave ya!" The Lizard's Pageant coach, Crystal, fussed over him, dabbing lipstick and mascara onto his scales.

"You said if I came out here you'd buy me a taco!" Pile Driver whined to his coach in the neighboring chair.

"Uh-uh child, oh no you didn't just say that! Tacos make you fat sweetheart," A very large lady said while eating a foot long sub from Subway. Extra everything. Her name was Ebony.

And Sandman was complaining about his costume.

"JUST PICK ONE ALREADY!" His coach was screaming. Her name was Lana.

"Hmm...I'm not sure which one matches my eyes better...pink or green?"

"You cannot like all the colors in the rainbow, only one! That's what my mom always told me, and I'm tellin' ya now! So pick a dress or I'll pick it for you!"

"How's it going over there Lana boo?" Ebony mocked.

"Shut your sandwich hole! Everything is going fine! And when I finish with Sandy, he will be crowned sexiest villain of all time!" Lana shrieked. Ebony snorted.

"Girl please, the only chance my Pile Driver would have of losing, is if he fell over dead on the runway. And even then he might still win!"

"Excuse me ladies, but my Lizzie is gonna murder your men in this thing! He's gonna win in his beautiful pink dress!" Crystal sang.

"Sorry Barbie, but pink don't solve everything!" Ebony sneered.

"Neither does being shaped like a whale!" Lana snickered.

"Um, pink is not just a color okay, pink is a way of life!" Crystal snapped.

"And being a whale is better than being a fake snob! Girl your more full of plastic than the Atlantic!"

Now, the three villains in question looked at each other nervously.

Pile Driver scratched at his makeup. And Sandman groaned. Lizard rolled his eyes.

"You guys, uh, wanna go get a taco or something?" Pile Driver whispered. They all glanced at their respective coaches.

Ebony's face was red and she dropped her sandwich. "Hold my earrings!"

Lana was cursing and spitting. "If your pig of a villain wins then this pageant is rigged!"

And Crystal was scoffing. "Girls, if Jesus himself was out there judging, you still wouldn't win!"

"You know what, a taco is perfect," Sandman nodded quickly. The Lizard nodded too and the three villains quickly tip-toed their way out of the pageant's backstage.

I just want to thank all of my glorious reviewers for being patient with me and if any of you guys are still sticking with me, than thank you! Anyway...

Wolf Out...