Author's Note: That was really hard to write, see you guys at the bottom.

Dear Cam,

It's been 28 days since you've disappeared out of everyone's lives. That's almost a month. The days go by extremely slow, and I have to keep myself busy with some sort of distraction or else my mind wanders to you. I can't take it, it's hell without you Cam. I figured time would make things better, but things have only continued to get worse. I wake up in the middle of the night, screaming, sweating, because I have nightmares about what you did. I know that probably sounds selfish of me to say, but you're the selfish one Campbell, you're the selfish one for putting everybody who cared about you in pain. Your mom is still mourning, but that's to be expected isn't it? She's worse than I am, and I try to help her, but I'm afraid I just can't do it. I can't help anybody until I help myself.

I wish you would have talked to me before you did all this to yourself, but everyone knows that wishes don't come true. And it's too late now, you're dead, and there's nothing else I can do but hope that time will make all the pain go away. This page has tears on it, because I couldn't bring myself to stop crying while I was writing it. You were so young Cam, and I wish I could understand why you did what you did. But even as time passes and I begin to grow older I don't think I ever will understand. I will probably never understand what went through your head everyday to make you feel like you had no other choice but suicide. Maybe one day, you can explain it to me, but I know that day will be far away in the late future.

Degrassi has gone back to normal since that day. Everyone was shaken up for a week or two, then things were okay. I wish it could be like that for me. I wish I could just go on autopilot, and go back to living my normal life. But I cared about you too much Cam, I cared about you too much to ignore those feelings of guilt, sorrow, and pain. I guess the whole purpose of this letter is just to let out these feelings that I've kept bottled up for a while. I don't really have many people to talk to about this kind of thing. I've contemplated going to see a counselor, but I'm still afraid of what other people will think of me for it.

We had a lot of good times Cam, and I miss you. Did you expect me just to forget all the stuff we did and all the time we spent together? Did you expect me to just walk away from all that? I'll never forget, and I'll never walk away because I loved you Campbell Saunders, and I could have helped you if you just talked to me instead of bottling it all up. But, it's too late now, and you're gone forever.

Love always, Maya

She read over the letter one more time before placing it on Cam's grave. She was glad she was able to finally get all of this off her shoulders. Maybe now, she could go about and live her normal life. She missed Cam like hell, but she knew nothing would bring him back.

Author's Note: This little fic was never meant to be that long. Anyway, I hope all you guys enjoyed and stuff. Be sure to check out my profile for other cool stuff, and feel free to send in a request if you want. I'm a senior in high school so I stay relatively busy, but I update all the time. I have other Degrassi fics too if you would like to check them out. Stay fabulous! Thanks for reading.