Chapter one

Harry Potter was exhausted, but his mind and body refused to shut down. He was still on edge but he did understand why. All his life it was about Voldemort, now he was dead, Harry had to get used to such a big change and wasn't sure how. After seeing the Weasley's and Hermione leave Harry sat on the steps outside the ruined castle. He watched Hagrid and Grawp cleaning up big bits of the broken castle, statues and even trees that had been pulled out by the roots. He watched students and staff working side by side as they searched everywhere for the injured or the dead. Harry wanted to help, but he was just too tired to move. He held a cup of coffee in his hand, occasionally taking a sip but his eyes kept watch over everything.

'Are you ever going to sleep Mr. Potter?'

Harry smiled as he looked up at McGonagall, 'I will eventually, I'm still too wound up, on edge, so I'll sleep later. But I'm also reflecting on what went on and what our world is going to be like now he's gone.'

Minerva sat on the step next to Harry and she had her own cup in her hand, 'It's going to be very different and a lot safer, safer than it has been in a very long time.'

'Yes it will, it's still hard to believe he's dead, that most of them are dead. After all these years of him terrorising our world, it's finally over,' Harry sighed wearily before turning to face McGonagall, 'Are you okay?'

'Yes, I'm fine, like you, tired but I'm not ready to sleep yet.'

'That's not what I meant, he slammed you into that wall pretty hard.'

'I saw Poppy, had a few breaks but their mending now. That is why I'm not doing a lot at this moment, it would not please the matron at all if I did anything.'

Harry chuckled, 'She told me to rest as well, actually she ordered me to rest. She should rest herself, she hasn't stopped since the fighting started and that was…when, I can't even remember when it started?'

'Yesterday afternoon and it's now eleven in the morning.'

'You'd think we'd be sleeping but we're not, neither are all those people. Neville hasn't stopped, just once when he saw Madame Pomfrey about his injuries.'

'No he hasn't, Neville is a surprising young man. He asked if he could remain here for a few weeks, he wants to keep helping.'

'Like I do, it's hard seeing Hogwarts like this, so damaged and some parts are completely destroyed, it's sad to see. How hard is it going to be to repair?'

'Some things can be repaired easily, but certain parts of the castle will need to be pulled down and completely rebuilt, the dark magic that was used makes it impossible to repair. We could take our time to remove the dark magic but it would be a year or more before it would be finished.'

'So it's like what Dumbledore told me about my scar, you can heal other cuts, but being done by dark magic it will always leave traces.'

'Exactly, the cut on your head healed but left that scar. You should know more than most that normal cuts and bruises can be healed completely, you've had enough of those over the years.'

Harry gave a very tired laugh, 'Yep, I sure have,' Harry looked back over towards the forbidden forest, 'So my new cut will scar as well.'

Minerva glanced down at Harry, 'New cut, which new cut?'

'I have another lightning shaped cut on my chest, right over my heart actually. Madame Pomfrey stopped it bleeding and gave me her terrible tasting potions. It shocked her when she first saw it, then she was her normal stern self.'

'Oh Harry,' Minerva put her hand on Harry's arm, 'We all wondered.'

'Everyone knew he couldn't resist. There's a lot I need to explain, but I can't, not yet. So if you need some answers right now there's a memory in Dumbledore's pensieve, I was going to see if you and Kingsley would watch it anyway, it has some information you will both need. If you need more, tell Dumbledore I said he can explain about me.'

'I'll get to that after some sleep. But why are you staring at the forbidden forest?'

'Just remembering what happened in there, my pain, Hagrid's sorrow, the death eaters laughter, his jubilation. So many emotions were felt in such a short space of time.'

'Fear of dying?'

Harry shook his head, 'No, I wasn't scared about that at all, you'd think I would be, but I wasn't. When you see the memory you'll understand more. I was frightened for all of you, what he would do if he survived. You showed who you supported, he would not have taken that very well, we all know that. But I wasn't afraid to die, I'm actually afraid to live.'

'That is a very strange thing to say, so explain to me why you feel that way Harry?'

'All my life he's been part of it, I've lived with the danger around me, I've lived with the fact my friends could die, I've lived with the fact that I would probably die. But I survived and he died; how I am supposed to live a life I never expected to have?' Harry sighed then turned to face McGonagall, 'I snuck out once, just after my birthday, I changed my hair colour, made it longer, kept sunglasses on then went to the ministry and had my will done. I really thought I wouldn't survive all this, so I wanted to make sure that the Dursley's couldn't get anything of my parents or anything that belonged to Sirius. I know I have to change it now, to add Teddy Lupin, but I also did something else while I was there,' Harry dug into his pouch and pulled out a tightly folded piece of parchment and handed it to McGonagall then went back to staring at the forest, 'With no family, just some close friends, I wanted to make sure that everyone close to me would get a share, including Hogwarts. So I named you executor of my estate in case I never got a chance to change things if I die. I knew you would take care of it, but you also know me, you would know what I wanted even if I never got a chance to change it. I made that before Remus told me I'm Teddy's godfather.'

'You've put a lot of trust in me Harry, which I will never abuse or misuse that trust. But you survived, so you can have your will updated. But thank you for the trust you put on me.'

'I've always trusted you and this is sort of my guarantee, so even though he's dead and most of his supporters are dead, some did escape when the fighting turned in our favour. So we all know there's a chance they could come after me,' Harry turned again, 'You don't mind taking care of all this if something were to happen to me?'

'No, I will take care of everything Harry, you do not need to worry. But nothing is going to happen to you, our war is over, it's safe, the safest it's been since before he started to gain power.'

'I know, but after my life, I don't take anything for granted anymore,' Harry stood and stretched, 'I think I'm finally starting to feel everything, I'm so stiff and sore. I might take a walk then I should be able to sleep.'

'You should and I might do the same thing. Just keep reminding yourself that his dead and you survived. You've got a chance now Harry, a chance to have the life you deserve,' Minerva patted Harry's shoulder then stepped back into the castle. Harry walked down the rest of the steps and over to the forbidden forest. He needed to see it once more then he could finally put that part of his life behind him, then hopefully the rest behind him.