Augustus was on top of me, nestled between my legs and kissing my lips passionately. The lack of oxygen was making my head fuzzy, and I used what strength I had left to gently push his face away.

"I'm ready," I gasp, fingers tangling in his hair. He looks at me with those big beautiful eyes and grins sotfly, that oh so familiar grin. He reaches down between us and attempts to place himself in the right spot...but when he tries to push in...well it didn't exactly go in. He veered off. He lets his head fall onto my shoulder and pants, embarrassed.

"I'm sorry I don't really...I mean I've never actually tried to..." I interrupt him with a kiss.

"It's okay," I murmur. Instead I try to grasp him. I try to overlook the fact that this is the first time I've ever touched a penis before, and I ignore the ferocious pounding of my heart while I place the tip of his manhood at the entrance of my vagina. I was familiar with my body, and not ashamed to admit to Augustus that I regularly masturbate. It was a simple pleasure, and I learned not to deny myself those pleasures a long time ago.

He kisses my neck and whispers back, "okay," before pushing himself forword, this time with a sharp buck of his hips sheathing himsef entirely inside of me. I hear a cry, and after the pain registers in my body I realize it was me who'd made the sound.

"Hazel Grace?" he moans, breath already increasing rapidly. "Oh my god, I don't even, I just," he takes a moment to process what's happening, eyes wide and jaw slack. He takes a deep breath and kisses me on the lips very, very softly. My fingernails are dug into his arms as he hovers above me; he trembles. "You feel so incredible," he whispers as he pulls away.

"I wish I could say the same," I murmur, voice tight as I try to hold back the tears. He is stretching me so far right now, and he is so well endowed...but I try not to think about the aching in my body, or the burning fire in my lady parts. I want this.

Gus tries to pull out, saying that he's sorry over and over again. "No, please, make love to me," I try to encourage him. I know how to handle pain, I can handle this. It will be perfect, since that's what he deserves...that's what we deserve...

"Are you sure...?" I kiss him, hard. I tangle my hands in his hair and gyrate my hips up towards his, somehow bringing him deeper into me than he was previously. We groan synchronized into each others mouths. "Hazel Grace..." he tries to pull away, so I repeat the motion.

I whimper into his lips, "make love to me Augustus." He kisses me back with abandon, pulling out slightly before pushing himself back into, to the hilt, causing me to cry out once more. But at this point, I've led him to believe these are cries of pleasure and not of pain.

"Okay," he whispers once more before it all begins.

Augustus does not hold back, and he is not quiet about it. He kisses my arms, my neck, my shoulders, my lips... He moves into me at an unsteady pace, breath faltering more than mine, and hips rocking so sharply. He devours me, grunting and squeezing me tighter in his arms with every thrust, my name falling from his lips like an echanted spell that could end world hunger. He is so beautiful, his body is so soft, his muscles so...

"Oh Gus, mmm," I can't help the sounds that come out of my mouth. This is still painful, but there's something about the way he feels moving so beautifully, something about the way we connect that's just so euphoric.

He stills his thrusting and looks me in the eyes, panting, saying, "I'm gonna cum soon."

"Okay," I answer, not thinking about anything but continuing this odd but sensational friction between us. "I love you so much Augusts, please don't stop," I beg of him. He kisses me deeply, our tongues swirling together in some erotic dance.

He pulls away and hovers above me, arms fully extended so our bodies were no longer touching. He watches me, his eyes never look away from mine as he makes delicious love to me. We study each other, moaning and whispering each others names, desperate calls for release behing heard by no one but each other.

His arms are scratched up, and now so is his back. I dig my nails deeper into his shoulder blades in an attempt to prevent myself from whimpering too loudly, and in turn his face scrunches up and he pushes harder into me, moaning louder and defeating the purpose.

Before much else can happen, and before we can say 'I love you' one more time, Augustus drops back down and buries his head in my neck while holding me tightly, and he starts rambling in a quick tone, and it takes me a minute to process what he's saying.

"I'm about to cum Hazel Grace, oh god I can feel it, it's never happened this fast before...Hazel Grace...Hazel...I'm cumming! Fuck!" He gasps and lets out this long drawn out groan, ecstasy lacing his voice as his body stiffings and he spills himself. "Oh fucckkk," he shudders, body trembling.

Augustus lies there in my arms for a few seconds after his orgasm subsides, trying to regain his ragged breath. I'm running my fingers through his hair and kissing his shoulders, his neck.

As it all comes to an end, three things come to my mind.

1. I just heard Augustus say the word 'fuck'. Wow, never thought that would happen.

2. We're both really sweaty.

3. We just had sex.

"Are you okay?" he finally whispers after about a minute of us lying there on our backs, the cold air on our moist bodies reminding us what we've just done. We were an inch apart, the only part of our bodies touching were our intertwining fingers.

"I'm great," I answer, turning my head to smile at him. He grins, but then sighs and props himself up on his elbow so that he could see me properly.

"Can I just apologize for how vulgar I was when I came? And for how hard I went, since it was your first time that had to of hurt, and for it not lasting very long..."

"Augustus," I cup his cheek in my hand and kiss his lips tenderly.

"Don't be sorry for this. We made love, and it was the first time. Everything was perfect." I don't let him say anymore, as I push him onto his back and wrap my arms around him, one leg resting gently on his. "I love you so much."

"I love you too, Hazel grace," he whispers, a great big smile appearing on his face.