Summary:Getting interrupted gets old fast. (Nalu AU oneshot)

Author's Note: Inspired by Asketchbookthing's beautiful piece of art. (Link can be found in my profile).

When he'd first brought her to his cave, Lucy had been honestly impressed. A mountain of gold, silver, platinum, gemstones, paintings, silks, even antique furniture… His instinct for collecting rare things was just astounding and had resulted in the most impressive, glittering hoard of treasure she'd ever seen. Natsu had nearly ruined her awestruck moment by telling her that as his mate she was now part of his collection too.

Of course, he'd immediately fixed it by saying that she was, of course, by far the most precious of his treasures. Flattery would get him everywhere.

This led to their first "roll in the coins," as he'd so eloquently put it, and Lucy ended up aching from small round bruises stamped into her skin where the money pressed into her during their frenzied activity. She'd complained and quickly regretted it when Natsu walked out of the cave without another word, unfazed by her shouted apologies.

She'd spent the day mentally kicking herself for offending him until he'd arrived with a bed carried effortlessly over his head, complete with silk sheets and enormous fluffy pillows. Explaining that it had taken him a while but he'd found the softest bed around, the princess had showered her dragon with affection.

And he'd been right - the bed was really soft. Which lead to a lack of clothes on her part, and him convincing her to model some of his favorite, shiny pieces of jewelry. He'd lazily confessed that he liked seeing her in nothing but jewels, and she'd tucked that fact away for repeated use.

Which was why she was currently wearing just the beautiful string of pearls he'd brought her earlier.

Lucy moaned, muscles in her thighs quivering. She moved them restlessly only to be stopped by Natsu's insanely warm hands holding them down. How was he so good with his blazing mouth? It just didn't seem fair. The sharp tug of pleasurable strings in her belly told her that she was so exquisitely close to the peak.

Just a little further…

Natsu's horned head sudden rose between her legs, cocked to the side and frowning. His fingers were still gripping her thighs, but his frown deepened into an irritated scowl. "Nooooo!" she wailed. "Not now!"

"Sorry," he said apologetically, "but if I don't go deal with this now he'll just stand around yelling into the cave. Or worse, come in and wreck stuff. Remember that last guy?"

She wanted to cry and nearly did. The frustration fueled her anger, and she grit her teeth. "Just… hurry up, okay? And wallop this moron for me."

Not wasting any time, Natsu jumped to his feet and hustled down the winding tunnels towards the cave's entrance. He was glad that they hadn't gotten to the part where he'd shed his own clothes, and, even though he didn't wear much in the first place, he wasn't entirely sure he would have the patience to get dressed again.

Though, come to think of it, that might be pretty hilarious and chase the stupid intruder off even faster than a face full of fire. Maybe next time…

"- foul beast! I will slay you and bring the pure maiden back to civilization as my -"

"The hell, man!" Natsu interrupted the armor clad knight's vow of mighty retribution, stomping out and quite literally steaming. "I was in the middle of having sex with my wife! What kind of dude does that to another dude?!"

The knight stared at him dumbly. His mouth opened and closed like a landlocked fish gasping for air. "W-what?"

"Sex. You do know what that is, right?"

"Of course I do!" the knight sputtered, embarrassed and indignant. This was so far from how he expected this encounter to go. Normally monsters roared and gnashed their teeth, not accused him of breaking the most sacred code of brothers.

"Let's get this over with. I should warn you, though," the dragon snapped, shaking out his shoulders in preparation for delivering a severe beating, "she was really close, and even if you somehow beat me she's gonna kick your ass for that. I mean, really, how would you like it if I came banging on your door while you were banging your -"

"Natsu!" Lucy scolded. "Are you done with this guy yet?" She had wrapped herself in one of the centuries old tapestries that the dragon hadn't cared enough for to hang on the wall. Her golden hair was mussed, face flushed and lips kiss swollen. Natsu thought she looked absolutely gorgeous and felt a stab of anger that some stranger was getting to see the same glorious sight.

Relieved beyond measure for the distraction, the knight declared, "Princess! I'm here to rescue you!"

"From what?" she scoffed, drawing the tapestry closer around her. "A mind blowing orgasm?" The rocks at the cave mouth were starting to dig into her bare feet, and her patience had really been tested. "I don't need rescuing, so just mosey on back to whatever castle you came from and forget you found us."

"Um…. well…" the armor clad man hedged. At this point, he would honestly like nothing better. This was the most bizarre run in with a dangerous, magical creature he'd ever had. Whatever confidence had dragged him through the dark, mysterious forest and up the rugged mountain side had evaporated under the woman's ferocious stare. "I… guess I'll go then… Sorry to bother you?"

"Whatever." Lucy flipped her hair over her shoulder dismissively. She was seriously sick of these pompous princes and arrogant knights tromping around and swearing to kill her husband at every turn. Any charitability she'd had towards the first few stupid sods was long since used up.

At least Erza had been apologetic and polite when she discovered the princess was quite happy where she was. Any time the formidable redhead was in the area, she still stopped by for tea and a bit of good natured gossip.

The knight turned and slunk away back down the rocky path, and Lucy watched him with narrow eyes until he'd disappeared from sight. Puffing out her cheeks, she shook her head in disgust. "Honestly… How many of these people are we going to have to deal with?"

"Eh. They've just been told too many lousy fairy tales," Natsu shrugged, edging back over to where his beautiful mate was glaring daggers at a no-longer-visible armored back. "There is a bit of truth in those stories, though."

Lucy's expression shifted to one of curiosity in an instant. She'd only ever heard him rant about how unfair it was that dragons were always the bad guys, so this exception was new. "Really? Like what?"

His fang filled grin was lascivious as he snatched her up over his shoulder. "I do like the taste of a particular princess!" Her squeal of embarrassment and delight echoed as they vanished into the cave.