Disclaimer: I do not own Buffy

A/N: Okay so here is my what if idea that starts right after Tara was killed. I am not sure if it will follow canon or not.

Goddess, right now she wanted to cry…to scream…to do something.

Tara, her partner, her girl was dead. One bullet…one shot was all it took, to spray her blood…her life force, all over. She had it on her; her hands were covered in it as well as her shirt. She even had a little on her face.

Once Tara's body was taken away, Buffy and Xander had ushered her inside and upstairs into their room, but it wasn't theirs anymore. It was hers'.

She didn't want to be in here, to be reminded of Tara right now, because here she could still pretend. Here she could still imagine that Tara was alive, that it wasn't blood on her hands…that she and Tara just got carried away with painting or something.

But Tara was dead, pretending didn't bring her back. She had to leave the room, she needed to go outside. Outside she could breathe. Leaving the room, she shut the door behind her and walked downstairs almost mechanically. Not seeing Buffy or Xander she went out front, not out back.

Out back is where Tara's death was made, created, originated, fated…any and all of those words. Sitting out there on a porch swing she shivered. She could stand the cold though. Maybe if she got cold enough, she could die and be with Tara.

As she sat there, things blurred around her. Her mind went blank. She wasn't aware how long she sat there, but all she knew was that the next thing she saw was the sunrise and it was calling her name.

"Willow…Willow?"

Wait…the sun wasn't covered in blue…

"Willow…"

Her vision cleared and she saw she was looking at…

"Oz?"

A/N: Yep Oz is back! Okay who loves me now for bringing him back?

A/N: Sorry if Willow seems like Buffy…her behavior I mean. I just think that if she could go Scary Veiny Willow then Depressed Can't Think Lose Touch with Reality Temporary Willow would work as well.