a/n: I am writing this fic with randomgirl1385. She's plotting with me and editing the chapters.

Disclaimer: We do not own Doctor Who.

Prologue

Fifteen Years Ago

River Song bounced from one foot to the other, holding the blanket-wrapped bundle in her arms. The baby was sleeping, but she still bounced her in a steady rhythm. She'd waited too long already. The expedition was starting this afternoon.

She cradled the baby's head in one hand. Her skin was smooth. She'd come out completely bald, and River wanted so badly to find out what color her hair would be. She'd just have to come home.

Renee Amelia Song. River never wanted to put her down. Handing her to the woman at the daycare center before teaching her classes each day of this past semester was hard enough. This though?

They had told her the expedition would be dangerous. They gave her the option to stay back, knowing her to be living alone with her young daughter, but she couldn't refuse. It was dangerous, life threatening maybe. That was the exact reason why she had to go. It was in those places that The Doctor came.

Renee opened her eyes a little with a groan of frustration at being woken from her nap. River smiled down at her. "Hi, baby. Hi my lovely." The baby smiled lazily up at her mother, and River couldn't help but stroke her head again. "Oh, I love you. I love you so much..."

She kissed the baby on her forehead and put the coordinates to her mother and dad's house into the vortex manipulator. She'd have to hold tight to Renee through the Vortex. She didn't want to take her this way, but she wasn't going to trust her baby to just anybody. especially not if she was heading into an unsure situation.

She pulled Renee up to rest vertically on her chest, the child's tiny fingers curling around the nearby wisps of her hair. She pressed the button.

The baby cried. River could feel it as they went through the vortex, but she couldn't hear it over the wind in her ears. She cradled her as close as possible without hurting her and repeated again and again, "It's okay. It's okay, darling."

When they appeared in front of the little house in 1951, a month after her last visit, River found her footing instantly, well practiced. Renee's frantic breaths and shakes became audible as soon as the wind left, and River started to bounce her again. "Shh... Shh... You're okay, my little one... Shh..."

Renee calmed down in a short time, and River went to the door. She never knocked, just went in, but today she decided she should.

Amy opened the door mid-sentence, still turned inside. "-because it's almost dinner."

"But Mummy," the little boy called from the other room. "Please? One cookie?"

She turned back to the door. "Oh! River? Why did you knock?" She seemed to notice the bundle then and her surprise turned to shock. "Who's this little one?"

River smiled at her baby again. This would be Amy and Rory's first time meeting their granddaughter. "This is Renee Amelia."

Amy shook her head, a cheeky smile spread wide on her face. "You named her after me?"

"I named her after my best friend, like you did. I just happen to know my relation to my best friend."

The little boy appeared in the doorway carting a stuffed dinosaur. "River!"

River bent down to be at eye level with Anthony. "Hi, buddy. Wow! You've grown since I last saw you!"

"I'm five now," he alerted her. "You didn't come to my birthday party."

She frowned and looked up at Amy with concern. Amy was already taking Anthony by the hand. "I told you. River was busy during your birthday party. She's here now."

"Yep, and I brought your niece. Do you want to see her?"

He started jumping up and down. "Yes! Yes please! Can I hold her?"

River stood up again as she answered him. "Of course you can. You have to sit on the couch though."

He ran into the house, and Amy held the door open so River could follow him. When the door shut, Amy called out, "Rory, River's here with news."

Rory came down the stairs within seconds. "Oh god, what now?" He saw the baby then, like Amy, looked shocked. "Oh my god."

Anthony was squirming on a couch cushion. "I'm ready! Can I hold her now? What's her name? Is she gonna live here? Can we keep her? Mummy, I want to keep the baby!"

River laughed and knelt down in front of her tiny, adopted brother. "You have to be careful when your holding a baby, Anthony. Do you know that?"

He nodded. "Yep. Cause I held Annabella." River had forgotten that the neighbor had been pregnant. She assumed this must be the name of the new baby.

"Okay, so you know how to hold a baby?"

"Yep." Then he frowned. "But can you tell me again?"

She laughed. "Yes of course."

She helped him to hold Renee correctly, positioning the two together so they were both mostly comfortable. "There. Her name is Renee."

He leaned close to her face and tilted his head to see her's straight. "Hi Renee. Hi. I'm your brother."

River laughed again. "No, silly. Your her uncle."

"Uncle? But I'm a kid." He sounded unsure.

"You are, but you're also an uncle.'

He giggled and kissed Renee's nose. "I'm your Uncle Tony. I think you're cute."

"Rory," Amy said, behind River. "Watch the kids. River and I are going to talk in the other room for a minute."

"I don't get to-" He cut himself off with a sigh. "Okay."

River stood and followed her mother into the dining room without argument. She knew she was going to get questioned. "Does The Doctor know?"

"No. I'm going to tell him soon. I haven't seen him in a long time. Not since Darillium."

"Is that when this happened?"

"No. I found out the next morning."

"How old is she?" Amy's voice was slowly transforming from stern to excited. She wanted to sound mad, but she just couldn't keep it up. "Why haven't you brought her here before?"

"She's four months old, and I didn't want to bring her today. The Vortex can be dangerous for such a young child."

She realized what that meant. "You had a reason for coming."

River nodded. "I have to go on an archeology expedition. I can't get out of it. It'll only be a few days, but I didn't want to leave her with a daycare for that long, and I don't know anyone well enough to trust them with my child there."

"You only brought her because you needed a sitter?" The hurt in her voice wasn't feigned this time.

"I didn't want to bring her into the Vortex. She hated it. She was terrified. I knew she would be."

"Is this your first expedition?"

River didn't want to lie, but if she said no, she'd have to explain that this was the first dangerous one. They had no idea what they'd be walking into. She prepared herself to say yes, but it wasn't what came out of her mouth. "No. I've been on others."

Rory would never catch on with such a small clue, but Amy couldn't miss it. Her face softened instantly. "Be careful, River."

"I know. I will be."

"I mean it."

"So do I. I would never leave her alone. I know what that feels like. I can't do it."

Amy pulled River into a hug before she could pull away. "River -Melody, I'm sorry..."

She pulled away. "I didn't mean to make you feel guilty. It wasn't your fault or anything. It's just a fact. It happened."

Amy nodded. "You could stay here. We have a guest room: blue walls, a nice bed. The door locks."

"Thanks, but really, I'm fine. I'll be back in a few days. Earliest I'd dare is tomorrow. She shouldn't have gone in the Vortex once, let alone twice in one day."

"River?" Anthony called. River hurried into the den where Rory was lifting his crying granddaughter from her uncle's lap, murmuring to her to shush.

"Can I take her?" River practically begged. "She probably just wants to be bounced."

He handed her over and she bounced a little. Renee stared at her. They had the same eyes. She hadn't known what her daughter would look like. She didn't know how it worked with regeneration. If every regeneration's appearance was factored in, she could have had any number of traits.

"No, no, no," she scolded lightly. "No more tears, my lovely. No more. Shh..."

Slowly, she calmed, and River handed her over to Amy, who immediately brightened. "Hi! Hi, Renee. Such a pretty name for such a pretty baby."

"It means rebirth," River told her. She'd quite liked that when she was scouring the name databases. Plus, it worked well with Amelia Song, which she wanted to be the child's second and last names.

"Rory," Amy said, "Rory, love-"

"Oh no. What?"

Cross at the expectation of negatives, she snapped, "I agreed we'd sit Renee for a while, I hope that's okay."

He looked unsure about the development but nodded anyway. "Of course. How long?"

"Not too long," Amy said before River could break the news. She gave her daughter a look as if to say run before he figures it out.

"So she is living with us?" Anthony shouted, excited. He hopped around River's feet.

"For a little while. Yeah. I'll be back real soon. Oh yeah, and happy birthday. I'll bring you your present when I come back. I forgot it this time."

"Okay!"

"Bye, bye, buddy."

"Bye, bye." He hugged her like he always did, and she squeezed him back. She hugged Amy and Rory, and finally kissed Renee on her forehead once more. "Goodbye, baby. I'll be back for you. Promise. I love you."

River went out the front door before using her vortex manipulator. Amy and Rory were trying to shelter Anthony from the time travel world, at least for now, and they didn't want him to see her doing things like that yet.

The trip felt even longer this time, which was surprising considering the last. She spent the whole of it wishing that she had her baby in her arms.

She reappeared in her classroom with her arms cupped as if holding an invisible child and her eyes burning with unshed tears. She'd never been so nervous to do something so dangerous. She'd always loved danger but not today.

"Professor Song?" said a pretty woman with long, dark hair, poking her head into the room. River had forgotten her name. "The team is almost ready to leave."

"I'm coming," she promised and went to her desk. "Just one moment, please."

"They said you have ten minutes," she pointed out. "I just wanted to let you know."

"Thank you." She sat down and pulled a small pad of paper from the corner. She'd been using it to bookmark certain events in her diary, but she was about to use it for something more important. She knew how to get it to the psychic paper. She'd tried once before, and gotten it in the right place, slightly wrong time but that was to be expected. There was so much time to sift through. It was hard to be perfectly accurate.

The library

Come as soon as you can x

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