A/N: Hello? Anyone alive out there? Because I barely am.

THAT EPISODE.

I loved it. I won't say that I wasn't sickened by what happened to Lincoln (I hate things like that) or that I was shocked by what Finn did, but c'mon. BELLAMY AND CLARKE HUGGED. I honestly thought the writers were going to ruin their reunion, I don't know why, BUT IT ROCKED. It was all that I wanted.

So I couldn't contain my feels, and had to get SOMETHING out. It's not my best work, but if I didn't write something I would go mad. Hope you enjoy it – why do we have to wait two weeks for the next episode?

DISCLAIMER: I do NOT own The 100 or any of the characters; I do not own the song/lyrics to the song below.

This Love Came Back To Me

This love is good, this love is bad
This love is alive back from the dead;
These hands had to let it go free
And this love came back to me

This love left a permanent mark
This love is glowing in the dark
These hands had to let it go free
And this love came back to me

- This Love, Taylor Swift

[C]

I see Bellamy at the gate and I feel – God I don't know. Something in my body snaps or breaks or releases, and before I know what I am doing I am hurtling towards him.

Such a great warrior Bellamy is, he doesn't even notice that I'm there until I jump on him. I cling to him, and it's only then that I fully allow myself to believe: he's alive. He's here. He's okay. I feel the smile on my face, wide and unable to contain. And then I feel his arms wrap round me, and that grounds me. Now I am okay too.

A thousand thoughts speed-run through my mind. All the time I had been away, I had been taking charge, thinking of ways to make sure all my people survived, I had wanted someone else: someone to turn around to, someone to support my theories, someone who would back me up. And later, when I thought about it, I realised that I wasn't yearning for Finn. Well, I was, but not in the way I thought. If Finn had been with me at Mount Weather, he would have supported the decision to stay. He would tell me that it was good, we should be happy these people were looking after us.

But Bellamy would have been suspicious. Bellamy wouldn't have trusted them either.

I relied on him, much more than I thought. It only increased the pain in my chest.

And then my mom said he was alive – both of them were alive. Only when she said that did I truly understand how guilty I felt about it, how much I needed to hear those words. And despite the fact I was so bruised and tired, I think that was the reason I slept so long.

Don't get me wrong, I love my mom, and I'm so happy she's alive. But I can already feel it, the tension between us. And I know it shouldn't be there. For God's sake, if my mother was dead like I thought I wouldn't give a damn about what happened. The truth is that I am not a little kid anymore – Earth isn't a place for little kids, they don't survive on Earth – and my Mom doesn't see that. I know that she is going to try and take over, try to keep me cooped up like on the Ark. But that won't happen.

And Raven – I thought she was dead too. It's shocked me, how bad her leg is. I didn't ask how the bullet came out. She must have needed surgery and, apart from some questionable leaves that you can chew (I found them about a week before the Grounder battle, and only tried them out on a few people) we don't have anything in the way of painkillers. Poor Raven must have been in agony. Still, she has a bright smile on her face for me when I see her, and we hugged.

But Bellamy...

I know it doesn't make any sense. At the beginning we were barely even friends. But something has happened between us. At first I wouldn't have greatly cared if he had died. But as time has gone on, I've changed – or rather, we've changed. At first it was just an alliance, a way to get everyone working together and keep them alive. I suppose that the trust and reliance naturally came with it. But friendship?

Yes, we are friends. Good friends. In fact, I think he's my best friend. He has seen every side of me and still likes me. Not a lot of people can say that. It's almost more than that. It's like he's another piece of me, an external part so that I only feel whole when he's around.

When we're ready, finally, we pull away. And I look at him and he looks at me, and neither of us say anything but we just stare at each other, and it hits me then –

And then I turn to look at Octavia. She actually looks better than both me and Bellamy, her face clear instead of covered in scratches and scars like mine and Bellamy's. There is a weariness in her eyes though, a pain, and I don't like to ask. I hug her and breathe her in. I've missed them, my family, all of them.

And then I remember Finn.

A look comes over Bellamy, like a shadow. "Looking for you," he answers, and just by the way he says it I know there is a change. That this world has changed on us once again.

But Bellamy is with me now. I can deal with anything when he is with me.

[R]

When I hear Clarke is back I curse my leg, hurrying to the tent. I wait until Abby comes out, and then she tells me that Clarke needs to rest. She herself goes back in and sleeps by her daughter's bedside. I look at Abby and know that this is how a mother acts. I wish mine would have.

When she finally comes out I see her wince. I heard that a bullet grazed her arm, and I can see it hurts when she puts on her jacket. Her face is covered in cuts and scrapes, hastily stitched together by Abby. But she smiles widely when she sees me and I hug her. I'm not like the others though; I knew Clarke would survive. She's a fighter.

She looks to the gates and says, "Bellamy." She looks at me and I can see the yearning in her eyes.

"Go," I tell her. "I'll catch up." I see a flash of pity in her eyes, but from Clarke I don't mind. She's my friend. We've shared everything, even Finn.

But then I see her go to Bellamy. She runs, I watch as she runs and leaps into Bellamy's arms. From the distance it's not so clear, but I see him put his arms round her.

I pause, leaning on my crutch. I feel happy when I see this. I don't understand at first, but then I realise it's because Clarke and Bellamy like each other. They don't know it yet, but it's as clear as day in their actions. They like each other, maybe even love each other. I almost snort with laughter at this, because I think if anyone will fight harder not to love anyone its Bellamy Blake.

But that's the thing about love, I think; it's get you when you least expect it. By all rights I should want to kill Finn for cheating on me. I can't though. Love won't let you.

I'm happy because if Clarke and Bellamy like each other, maybe there's a chance for me and Finn.

[O]

This place is so different from our camp. I feel like I am walking back on the Ark again (not that I did much of that when I was on it). Maybe it's because of all the adults around. I'm not used to them. People don't tell me what to do, I say what I do – which is probably why Bell has had such a hard time with me.

I glance at my brother as he gives up his gun. Bellamy is different these days. When we first came to Earth he couldn't have given a damn about anyone else but me. But here he is, returning Monroe and this new girl to the camp when I know he would rather be out searching for the others. Bellamy didn't let that girl die; I don't know whether he would have done that when we first arrived.

As someone takes the injured away I want to say something to Bell: like how proud I am of him; that Mom would have been proud too. I have a jumble of words running through my head when something blurs past me and attacks my brother. Clarke.

I don't know who's more surprised, me or Bell. I figure it's him because he doesn't even move when she's holding him. And then I think he realises that it's not a dream, that she's actually here, and wraps his arms round her.

They're hugging. Clarke and Bellamy, who used to hate each other, are hugging each other so tight. They're actually swaying a little as they hold each other. Clarke has a grin on her face and Bell actually has his eyes closed, like a sap.

"Now there's something I thought I'd never see," I say. I am expecting to break them apart, but instead they keep hold of each other. Bell gives me a laugh but I'm not even sure if it's in response to what I've said. They pull away a moment later, but to my surprise they don't even speak. They just stare at each other, smiling in their utter delight at seeing each other.

That's when I see it. The heat between them, something there that shouldn't be. I've never seen Bell look at someone like that; and thinking about it, I'm not sure that Clarke has ever looked like that either.

I don't bother to hide a smile. Yeah, this is gonna be interesting. But for the record, I ship them.

[A]

I feel my legs shake when I see Clarke. When she says my name (the way the word Mom trembles over her mouth) I feel my heart leap with joy. My daughter, my baby. She's here. I have her back.

I heal her as best I can and watch her sleep. Her face is covered in scratches and I try to see through them, trying to find the face of my little girl under there. It's hard though. She hasn't really explained how she got them. I tell myself that she'll explain later, that we'll talk. That I'll explain about what happened to Jake. That she'll forgive me.

But it doesn't turn out like that. All she talks about is Mount Weather and berates herself for sleeping so long. She gets up and though I want to shove her back down, I am needed elsewhere.

I leave her (though all I want to do is wrap her in my arms) and go see the others that have arrived. The kid Bellamy explains that there were no survivors in the wreckage of another part of the Ark. I feel bad for them, but at the same time I am so thankful that our part survived.

I lead the injured to the medical tent. Then I hear a scuffle behind me. I turn back round to see my daughter in the arms of Bellamy Blake.

I watch him hug her back, and the two of them sway a little on their feet. He holds onto her for longer than normal, and I know that there's something between them. From what I could tell it was that Finn kid that had feelings for Clarke, but watching these two now I am not so sure.

As I watch them break away I realise: I'm jealous of him. I'm jealous of the way my daughter goes to him without thought, jumps into his embrace without fearing rejection. She is utterly herself with him. She trusts him.

The next thought I have hurts: she trusts him, loves him, in a way she'll never trust or love me again.

My little girl is gone.

[B]

The fire provides the only light. From where I am sitting I can see Octavia and Clarke. Before I would have stared at Octavia, fearing for her life; but now I know better. Octavia is stronger than I ever thought she could be. My baby sister is gone, but the girl that has replaced her is confident and fearless. I will still protect her whenever I can – my sister, my responsibility – but at least I now know she can survive if I am not there.

My eyes stray to Clarke more often that Octavia.

She is asleep, her face relaxed. I can't take my eyes off her. I've never seen Clarke sleep before. She is so serene, her face free from worry or pain. She looks beautiful.

Mentally I slap myself. Fucking idiot. I don't know what's happening to me. That moment with Clarke has done something to me.

I hadn't expected to see her. When she hugged me I froze. I couldn't tell you what I was thinking at that moment. I think it was a combination of fear and disbelief. Then I smelt her, the clean smell of medical equipment and a scent that I can only call Clarke's own. That's when my brain kicked into gear and I realised she was actually here.

I hugged her back. In that moment – though it lasted longer than one moment – I didn't think of anything else. I heard what O said and laughed belatedly, but I was on autopilot. All I could truly focus on was Clarke and realising she was here. It was a strange feeling, because I felt so completely there and detached at the same time. My legs felt weak and my hands tingled. I didn't want to let her go.

I didn't want to let her go.

I don't want to let her go.

Without Clarke... I missed her, but it was more than that. I was...bereft without her around. I never thought I would miss the princess barking orders at me, complaining for the hundredth time that I was doing something wrong – but I did. I never realised how much I depended on Clarke to keep me on the right road. Without her I forced myself to think what would Clarke do?

What would Clarke do when she found that girl hanging from the cliff?

She would rescue her. Every life matters, she would have reminded me. So I rescued her, even though it held me up from rescuing Clarke and the others – or so I thought.

It's wrong of me, isn't it, to be pleased that I found her first, not Finn? That she and I had our reunion before those two did?

Now that Clarke is back, my head is clear. Without her my head was foggy and I somehow struggled to make decisions. With her here, it's clear. I have clarity. And with that comes regret, because I shouldn't have let Finn go off looking for them. He's not in the right frame of mind. He killed that Grounder without a second thought. It scares me a little to think about it. I hate surprises, and Finn Collins killing that Grounder is one of the biggest on this planet.

I look at Clarke again. I don't want to tell her about Finn, but I know I have to. There's a certain level of trust between us two, so I can't lie to her. Our relationship doesn't work unless we trust one another. I have to tell her, though I think it'll hurt her. I should have kept Finn with me. Idiot.

She loves Finn. I know that.

She opens her eyes and looks at me and my mind stupidly flickers to it: the memory I try my best to ignore because honestly, I don't have time for it. I think of when I was teaching her to shoot and I touch her, straightening her posture. I felt it then, the electricity. I felt myself – I can't even describe it. I felt myself go light when I touched her. I felt myself want to touch her.

I open my mouth to tell her this. Instead I give her forgiveness for closing the door, which I know she needs.

I don't think about that memory.

A/N: I must seem like a huge Taylor Swift fan (if you've read my previous story of these two, Red). I'm not mad on her, but I found a video that had this song on with Bellamy and Clarke and it suited them so much, I just had to use it.

Hours to make. Seconds to comment.

PLEASE REVIEW!