I never believed in fate –it was just some superstition people held on to for comfort. But I never dismissed the idea either.

It was only on that day –that blissfully ordinary day, I thought I'd give it up altogether.

I walked into your white washed hospital room only to find a pair of clear blue oceans follow me without a hint of recognition. The very thought kept me awake at night chilling me to the core.

I thanked you on behalf of the Republic and its citizens. I told you of the great service you've done for this country. But we both know these worlds are lies; just a truth told without sincerity. No words will ever begin to describe what you went through to see this country rise again. The words felt foreign to me. Like I was speaking through a glass wall.

It's funny, isn't it, Day?

That we both felt like two completely different people in front of each other. But only one of us had nothing to hold on to. No memories to bury the knife deeper in the chest.

Every waking moment without you felt like traveling underwater. All traces of light couldn't reach me. The warmth of the sun had faded into a fond and hopeless memory.

I saw June. But it wasn't the June before her brother was killed. It wasn't the June you saved on the streets. I hear a dry laugh I realize must be my own.

Hard to imagine it's been that long, huh?

You saved me in more ways than you think, Day. I was sick when we crossed to the Colonies. Yet you never abandoned me. I always felt your eyes follow me even when they've brought us to the hospital.

If I close mine I swear I can still feel your kind and shaking hands holding me together. Your calm and soft voice washing over me. In that moment I know that I still have you.

You never leave.

I can tell myself that it was for the best. But I know it wasn't. Not for me, anway.

Now I wonder if our positions were to be reversed. Would you be wiser and not make my mistakes. Only we are too alike to know that that wouldn't be true. You listen your heart–your selfish, kind heart.

It's not unoften that my thoughts drift back to before Metias' death –to a different lifetime. I try to imagine that world without ever knowing you. But try as I might, the idea turns ridiculously ordinary. So painfully wrong.

Do you ever think that if you'd lose something, you'd lose your sanity as well?

You'll say that you'd be fine without it and shrug it off without a second thought. You know that you'll be all right but only because you've never really lost it.

Thinking of that other lifetime was like that.

Thinking I'd be fine without having ever met you. But I knew it's only because I had you. Because I've caught a glimpse of the sun, I can't imagine being kept in the dark.

But in this endless night, I fear that I've lost hope –I've lost my silver lining.

I bury the words I'm too afraid to say. Too scared that it's meaning will disappear in the wind along with the millions of voices chanting your name.

Only I suppose in this moment–in this desperate darkness–can I whisper it.

I miss you, Day. And I'll miss you more than you will ever know.

Yet your glowing figure is already starting to dim.