Rory traipsed back into her cubicle at work, exhausted, on a cold January morning. Her feet hurt already, having been not been uncomfortable in heels for two weeks. She glared down at her toes, cursing them for being so used to her Doc Marten's, and not the black pumps she was now sporting.

She'd answered sixteen questions the way to her desk, just a few feet from the office door. There was a pile of paperwork spread across it, her in-tray already full, and she cursed herself for taking any time off. Although, not going home at Christmas was not an option for her. However, January blues were definitely instilled in Rory's psyche. Of course, she couldn't be too bummed, as she sat on her black office chair, smoothing out her pencil skirt and smiling a little to herself as she started on the mountain of proofing, edits and re-writes she'd been assigned.

"Good Holidays?" her cubicle-mate, Tate, a fellow small-towner-living-in-the-big-city. Rory turned to the dark haired man, smiling a little wider.

"Really good, thanks. Yours?" Rory asked politely.

Tate was grinning, shaking his head. "The kids were wild, as can be expected. We went back home, and, well, I don't need to tell you what small town Christmases are like, do I?" Rory smilingly shook her head, and Tate turned back to his work. She really liked Tate. He liked to work like she did. He was the perfect cubicle mate, really.

Rory, too, turned back to her work, only half concentrating. Her head was still elsewhere. Back at home with her Mom and Luke. And the whole town.

Oh who was she kidding? She was mentally with Jess. There was no way around it. As he'd promised, he'd spent his whole holiday with her, and she'd loved every second of it. They had arrived and left separately (as Jess had only a week off), but every other minute, they'd spent together, except when Rory and Lorelai had catch-up movie nights.

It sounded trite, and to Rory's reasonable mind, crazy, but she was completely head-over-heels. And not only that, with someone who felt the same, if not more so. Not only that, but someone who in many ways as her perfect compliment. He was clever, and witty, and cerebral, and complex, and well read. They had differing opinions of some things, and he was more jaded than she, but somehow this made it even better. When they disagreed hotly, eventually he'd kiss her to sooth her, and they'd both be smiling, forgetting that he had disparaged her favourite author, or that she had ripped apart an album he loved. Small things, but important to them.

His mind is what she loved most. Reading his books, his scribbled notes in the margins, her heart swelled, knowing that little insights into his head were few and far between (though more frequent than they ever had been when they were kids) and that he was allowing her to pour over them. Like he knew she wouldn't judge him like, he'd explained, he'd always felt everyone had. Never her, though. She was pure and good, he'd told her, and she felt distinctly on a pedestal, but touched all the same.

She loved him, absolutely. And he loved her.

Her Mom had been oddly supportive about it all – little to no fuss had been dredged up from Jess and Rory's past. She'd mocked him, sure, but that was Lorelai. Jess had been good natured, and ran his thumb along her knuckles supportively, smiling like Lorelai, Luke and April weren't in the room. Nothing like his teenage self. But still enough like him for Rory to feel like her heart, any moment, was going to give out.

Rory shook her head, trying to clear it, smiling giddily, finally settling down to work.

-break-

The next night, Jess had called her as she arrived home. Flipping on the light of her small apartment, she slid the answer button on her phone.

"Hey."

"Hey, yourself. How was the first two days back at work?"

"My feet hurt," she told him, slipping off her blue stilettos. "Otherwise, okay. No word back from my features article, yet."

"They'd be stupid not to print it."

Rory didn't answer that, but smiled anyway. "How's work been?"

"I have six manuscripts to proof in a fortnight," he sighed. "One to edit for as soon as possible, because the author's a bit of a flake, and the sooner we get it back to him, the sooner he can get back to work. Otherwise, okay." Rory smiled again, realising he had called simply to distract himself from work that was inevitably sitting right in front of him. "To be honest, I'm losing the will to live."

"Well, best muster it again, Mariano. I just got you back."

His chuckle came over the line, and she smiled in response. "How was Stars Hollow after I left?"

"Slightly less kiss-filled."

"Slightly?" he asked, a little incredulous. But he knew she was kidding.

"Babette and Miss Patty were very upset that you left."

"They were like vultures."

"They like you."

"A little too much. I liked it better when they called me a hoodlum."

"Face it, Jess. Your home town likes you, now. You're one of us. More importantly, you're with a Gilmore girl. That means they love you."

"Don't even joke. Those two gave me post-traumatic stress disorder. I may never be the same again – my ass will never be the same again." he said in good humour, and Rory laughed sparklingly. And after a beat, he said, "I miss you, Ror'."

She smirked a little into her phone. "Oh yeah?"

"I've grown accustomed to seeing you, and it's been a week."

It didn't take Rory long to recover from that statement, surprisingly. "Hark, if the hoodlum heard you now."

"He'd be thanking his lucky stars you're still even talking to him."

Sometimes, Jess threw Rory off with these totally unprecedented statements of sweetness, that, she was sure, he wasn't even aware of how sweet he was being. This was one of those moments. She couldn't really find her words for a moment, so she busied herself by turning on her coffee machine.

"Hey, Rory? Do you want to come over? Or I can come to you, if you prefer?"

"Don't you have work?" Rory asked, her tone giving her away that she hoped he'd blow it off.

"Sure. But I miss you, so it's not getting done tonight, even if you say no." Rory smiled. Knowingly, Jess added, "What's your address?"

-break-

Jess rang the bell of Rory's tiny apartment a short time later, and she opened the door with a smile. Jess, standing in her doorway, all intense and beautiful, was not smiling as he stepped toward her and kissed the smile off of her face.

Rory gasped into his mouth as he kicked the door shut, pulling back to smirk and say, "Hey."

"Hi," she said meekly,

They hadn't slept together yet. Having just reconnected, and then going to Stars Hollow hadn't left a lot of time for that. Maybe that was why everything was absolutely killing her in that department. Even kissing him made her crazy. Of course, kissing him always had. But it was particularly killing her.

And now, on a Tuesday night, here he was in her apartment.

Rory bit her lip and watched as Jess' eyes darkened and zoned in on that action of hers.

"Rory?" Jess rasped quietly, dragging his eyes from her mouth. "I didn't, uh … I'm just here to see you. There'll be time for ..."

Rory watched him as he shifted, looking apprehensive. But he couldn't help is eyes trailing back down to her mouth, it seemed. "You look convinced," she teased.

"I'm not," he choked out, but sighed. "But this is … I need it to be … This is real."

"As opposed to …?" Rory checked, smoothing her hands over his pectorals.

"Ror'," he said in a warning tone. "I'm trying to have integrity, here. You're making it very difficult, looking at me like that."

Even though Rory wanted him not to have integrity for just a little while, she appreciated what he was doing. He wanted their first time to be perfect – she knew that is what he wasn't saying. She kissed him softly once more, and his hands gripped her waist, before she said a soft, "Sorry."

"You have work tomorrow," he reminded her. He followed her into her kitchen and watched as she switched on her coffee machine.

"I'm a journalist. I can work from home occasionally."

"Okay, I have work tomorrow."

"The wonders of coffee, young grasshopper."

"I can't believe you are trying to convince me to ..." he struggled for a moment, his neck colouring. Rory watched gleefully as this happened.

"Are you shy, Jess?" she asked, mirthfully.

"No," he replied, defensively, taking the coffee she had offered him. "I'm just … trying to be a good guy. Which is apparently impossible around you."

Rory was smirking as she sipped at her coffee, leant against the kitchen counter. "When did you decide you were going to be this 'good guy' and behaving?" Jess drank from his cup, avoiding her gaze.

Rory rolled her eyes, placing her cup down and stepping close to him, taking his cup from him too. He looked down at her with dark eyes as she pushed herself up to him and kissed his cheek softly, placing her hands on his belt. "We both know you're going to give in, Jess."

Jess struggled for a moment, before saying, "If someone had told me in high school that you'd be soliciting me like this, I would've laughed them out of the room, you know," his voice like honey.

She ignored him, stroking his buckle. "I missed you this week."

Jess groaned, backing up a little until he hit the counter. "That's not fair," he said, holding both of Rory's hands in his own. "You're not fair," he moaned. Rory couldn't help but laugh, giving up.

"Fine," she sighed. "But if we're not doing that, we're having a glass of wine. Deal?"

Jess smirked, knowing he'd won, and nodded, only correcting her slightly, with, "Beer."

-break-

The Saturday night after, Jess came by to pick her up. He hadn't told her where they were going, which was infuriating and lovely all at once.

"Jess," Rory asked, still digging through her closet, trying in vain to find something appropriate to wear. She prayed to be back home and have her mother and her closet at her disposal, too. Things would be far easier if that were the case.

"Mmm?" he answered vaguely, standing by Rory's bookshelf in the living room, his nose in a book. If he had been any other man, she would have thought he wasn't listening, but she knew Jess as well as possible, and she knew that, like herself, he could have a full and comprehensive conversation, all the while with his nose in a book.

"Could you come here a moment, please?" she called, throwing yet another garment on the bed behind her in frustration.

"Are you changing?" he asked, not glancing over his shoulder so that he could see into her room.

She looked down at herself. Wearing just a bra and a skirt was probably testing his boundaries just a little, but frankly she didn't care. Old Rory would be mortified at the thought of Jess seeing her like that – mostly because he had stirred up her sexuality in ways no other had by that point in her life. Now, after Logan and much of Rory's twenties, she could care less. "Yes, but I need help."

Jess sighed, turning tentatively to see her topless with her hands on her hips. "What am I supposed to wear when I don't know where I'm going?"

Jess was staring. This made Rory blush. After several moments, and Rory turning away to trawl through her closet again, the blush covering most of the top half of her body, Jess spoke, voice a little rough, "A top, preferably."

She smirked to herself. "Preferably, really?"

Jess cleared his throat uncomfortably, before replying, "Okay, maybe not preferably. But I'd rather other men couldn't see you like this when you're dating me … So a top is preferable in that sense."

"I never took you for someone who would squirm at semi-nudity, Jess."

"Funny. I took you for someone who would. My, have the tables turned." Jess crossed the living room, avoiding looking at her and nudged her out of the way as he looked through Rory's wardrobe. He picked a cobalt dress cut to the knee and handed her it, careful only to look at her face. "I'm a gentleman, now, you know?"

"Huh," Rory uttered, ironically.

"Don't use my signature comeback," he warned, jokingly. His eyes glittered as he forced himself to look her in the eye, but she could see him straining a little in the control department.

"We could stay in," she said, not answering him.

He studied her for a moment, silently, his eyes sweeping her features. "Sometimes I forget you're not the same Rory I met back in Stars Hollow when I was seventeen. You were so … innocent and … unmarked and … I don't know. You were fresh. Nobody had … You weren't as disenchanted with the world as I was. You were positive and light, like nothing had ever hurt you."

"And now I'm different?" Rory asked, uncertain, tugging on the dress and slipping the skirt she had already had on down, before trying to zip herself up, getting stuck halfway, watching him for his answer.

"No. You're still the same," he told her, and Rory let out the breath she hadn't realised she was holding. "But now things have hurt you."

"Which makes me different," she observed, still watching him worriedly. Terrified of … well, terrified of the thing she was scared to admit she expected to happen.

"You're still this beautiful, untouchable thing to someone like me, Rory. That makes you exactly the same, in my eyes." His expression softened and he reached for the zip of her dress, delicately moving her hair out of the way and slid the zip up. "Just you being you impresses me. I'm not Logan or anything like him. If you're really so sexualised now, well, frankly, good. We'll have fun with that. If not, Ror', that's good too. I love you, and physically, we've always been incredible, so sex is going to be good. There's no rush."

Rory struggled over that for a moment. He'd called her out on being over-sexed? She faltered. She hadn't been like that before Logan. With Dean it had always been fumbling and awkward. Had Logan really affected her like that?

Jess watched her apprehensively, watching as her confidence slipped. "Okay, wrong thing to say. Sorry. Sorry. Ror'?" She sat down on her bed, and he, beside her, worried.

"No, you're right."

"Just to be clear," he added, "Totally open to having sex any time. I'm not a monk." He was joking, and Rory smiled a little. She kissed him, leaning lightly into him as he hand came up to weave through her hair.

She pulled away as he tried to deepen the kiss, smirking. "And I'm not Maria." She kissed him on the cheek. "I've just never thought about that before. How much relationships change you. I need to think about that."

Jess smiled fondly. "If you were any other woman, that would be worrying. Thankfully, blissfully, you're Rory Gilmore."

"And thankfully, blissfully, you're Jess Mariano, the only man I didn't turn into Donna Reed or Marilyn Monroe for."

Jess' brow furrowed slightly in confusion, before Rory leaned in to kiss him gratefully.

-break-

Jess had been right, of course. He was ever the spokesman for the perceived human condition. He was right that Rory had been trying to be the Rory she had been with Logan, and her boyfriends since. She had forgotten that the version of herself that was most like her true self was Jess' Rory. He had always known her better than anyone – minus perhaps her mother. But in some ways, he knew her even better than Lorelai did. He was insightful – maybe because he had shared in the worlds of fiction she had while she was growing up and since. Maybe reading the same books, even liking the same books as someone, let them look through you and know you as they know themselves.

Or maybe it was just Jess.

Weeks had passed, and Jess was right about more – physically, they were incredible. After, Rory had giggled for five solid minutes, just totally gleeful. Of course, understanding immediately, Jess laughed with her, saying, "God, we should have tried that, sooner." And Rory had wholeheartedly agreed. There had been a lot of lost time, but, she amended in her head, needed lost time. Or else what they had now, it would be different. Despite her Mom, Rory wasn't a big believer in 'fate'. She would put money on Jess being totally opposed to the whole notion, actually. But that was what their relationship felt like – like somehow, from the day she and Jess met, this was meant to be their ending.

Or … perhaps more aptly, the beginning of their ending.

-FIN-