"Thanks for granting me this interview," Khalisah said as the light on her camera blinked off. "Frankly I was surprised to get your message."

Bex shrugged with her good shoulder. "Hard to believe, I'm sure, but you're the only reporter I bloody trust right now, and the only one who'd actually talk about the Reapers. All the rest of 'em only want to talk heroics and all that bullshit." She shook her head. "It's a fucking disgrace to the memories of those who died in the Battle."

"Agreed." Khalisah stood up and shouldered her bag. "I should go. Your interview will air sometime in the next couple of news cycles."

Bex nodded as they walked to the door. "Hope it turns some heads or changes some minds. At least makes someone think."

"Oh it will," Khalisah said. "If there's one thing I'm good at it's—"

"What the hell…" Hackett cut himself off as he walked through the front door, nearly colliding with Khalisah. He stood to the side to allow her to pass, raising an eyebrow at Bex the moment the door closed. "What was that woman doing in our apartment?"

"The Council is trying to hide the truth, Steven," Bex said, staring him down. "They're shutting me down, shutting down anyone who tries to talk about the Reapers."

"And Ms. al-Jilani was here because…"

"Because she'll get the truth out there."

Hackett snorted. " Her truth, perhaps."

Bex rolled her eyes as she moved past him, back toward the living room and the nest she'd made out of the sofa. "She's changed, Steven. I know you don't want to see it but she has."

"We'll see."

The interview aired two weeks to the day after the Battle for the Citadel. Bex waited for some sort of reprimand from the Council, perhaps one of the angry vid-calls she'd become so accustomed to. But nothing happened: no calls, no public rebuttal, nothing. However, she knew from long experience of dealing with Vido that silence didn't mean the matter was settled—on the contrary it was just beginning.

A week after the interview aired, Bex received a datapad with orders: the Normandy, all hands, was to ship out within 24 hours. No excuses, no exceptions, no delays.

Fuck.

"I swear, you two are bloody useless." Bex glared at Hackett and Anderson as they stood in the Normandy's docking bay three weeks to the day after Saren's defeat. "A Counselor and the head of the Alliance, and neither of you could call off this bullshit?"

"I assume you didn't actually read the order fully," Hackett said. "It came from me."

Bex felt her biotics tingling under her skin as she blinked slowly at him. "What the fuck… are you… you…"

Hackett held up a hand. "Be glad it's from me, Rebekah. The Council wants to get rid of you, likely permanently if they thought they could get away with it. This is a simple patrol, to get you out of their hair for a couple of weeks."

"And for my part," Anderson said, "there wasn't a hell of a lot I could have done. You know I've always got your back, but I am all but useless at the moment."

"I…" Bex's jaw snapped shut as she tried to wrap her mind around it all.

"There is absolutely no way the rest of the Council would listen to me," Anderson continued. "And especially not when it comes to you. You are a thorn in the Council's side and have been from day one."

"It's really not my bloody problem if they like me or don't," Bex retorted. "They're the ones who decided, however begrudgingly, that I should be a Spectre."

"It's only for a couple of weeks," Hackett said again, breaking a tense silence that stretched on for what Bex felt was a bloody eternity. "And then—"

"And then what ?" Bex frowned. "If you or the Council think a couple of weeks hunting geth is gonna shut me up about Sovereign and the Reapers, you don't know me half as well as you think you do, Admiral ."

Anderson's eyebrows shot up and he took a step back but Hackett held his ground. "I have no such expectations, Rebekah, but I'm not looking toward the future at the moment. I'm trying to keep you safe in the here and now."

"Oh."

He held a hand out to her. "Are you all right?"

She nodded mutely and put her hand in his, allowing him to pull her into a careful embrace. She thought they might have stood there forever, wrapped up in each other and forgetting the rest of the galaxy, if not for an awkward cough from Anderson.

"Your crew awaits, Commander," he said when she turned to glare at him.

"Fine, let's get this over with then." She leaned up and brushed a kiss across Hackett's lips. "I love you. And I'm sorry I'm so—"

"Passionate," he said. "Never ever be sorry for that, my love. Never." He touched his forehead to hers for a moment before he pulled away. "Be safe."

"This is ridiculous," Kaidan said for the umpteenth time in the last three weeks. "Out here, we're more likely to find pirates or slavers than geth."

"Rather like to go pirate myself, really," Bex said, more to herself than him, as she accepted a beer from Ashley and propped her feet up on her desk. "Save me a fuckton of trouble."

Ashley snorted a laugh. "Pretty sure the hunt for Saren proved that is absolutely not true, Skipper."

"He almost got away with it, y'know," Kaidan said. "One good hit from one of the Colossi on Ilos and the Mako would have been toast."

Bex shuddered. "Can we change the subject? I do not want to think about being bloody stranded on Ilos."

"Not to mention what would have happened to the galaxy if you hadn't stopped Saren," Ashley added.

"Fair enough," Kaidan said, taking a long pull on his beer. "So, Ash, how's the fam?"

Before she could respond, the voice of Lt. Pressly, the Normandy's navigator, broke in over the comm. "Commander? We've got a bit of a situation up here."

In the background, Joker shouted "Everybody brace for evasive maneuvers!"

"The hell's going on, Pressly?" Bex asked as her feet hit the deck.

An explosion rocked the ship seconds later, plunging the room into darkness and sending Bex flying into Kaidan and Ashley. They disentangled themselves as the emergency lighting turned on and the klaxon blared across the ship.

"You two work on getting everybody to the escape pods," Bex said, steering Kaidan and Ashley toward the stairs and the emergency gear stored in their lockers. "I'm gonna go see what's what up top."

Kaidan pulled her back. "What about you?"

" What about me?"

"Your gear?"

"In my cabin." Bex growled in frustration when he still hesitated. "I'll be fine. Go!"

Not bothering to see if he'd gone, she ran back to her cabin, to the heap of armor on the floor beside her bed. She'd been so bored the last three weeks, she'd been trying to modify it.

She carefully unwrapped her injured arm and began putting her armor on as quickly as possible. What should have taken five minutes at most took infinitely longer as continued attacks knocked her off her feet again and again before she finally buckled her mag boots and found solid footing.

Her breather helmet locked into place, she braced herself for the trek up to the command deck. Despite the protection of her armor, she still balked at the flames stretching across most of the floor outside her cabin. Memories of the Vancouver house fire flashed through her mind as she gingerly picked her way across the space to the stairwell.

Squashing down the painful memories for the moment, she ignored the flames licking at her boots and ran up the stairs, but stopped short at the top, the utter destruction of the CIC temporarily stealing her breath.

Across the galaxy map, she could see Joker, safe for the moment behind a shield separating the cockpit from the rest of the deck. She had to get to him, get them both to the pod between the cockpit and the airlock.

She knew she couldn't linger—the ship was barely holding together as it was. One, maybe two more hits and they'd be nothing but space dust.

Steeling her nerves, she bolted around the galaxy map, stopping only to double check the strength of her mag boots, and started the slow journey across the bridge to the cockpit, ducking around bodies and flying debris.

Over the comm, she could hear Joker. "Mayday! This is the SSV Normandy. We are under attack! Anyone! Come on, girl, hold together!"

His hands flying over the controls as if they were in battle, he didn't appear to notice Bex until she was standing right beside him.

"Joker, let's go. It's over."

He shook his head. "No, it's—I can't leave her. I'm sorry, Commander."

Bex chewed on her tongue for several seconds to keep from snapping at him. "No, I'm sorry. I… I can't… I won't let you sacrifice yourself for a goddamn ship."

When Joker continued his futile attempts to save the ship, she took matters into her own hands, grabbing him up and into a fireman's lift.

She knew they'd both be in a world of hurt later, but better than spaced.

"What the fuck, Shepard?"

Racing against the next attack, she set him down as gently as she could in the pod and slammed her fist into the controls to lock it and send it on its way before she collapsed into the nearest open seat.

Fuck. That was too goddamn close.

No longer needing to concentrate on surviving from one moment to the next, her mind wandered back to those memories she'd pushed away. The images were faint, hazy, the details worn away by the years and too many concussions, but the feelings of terror, helplessness, those were as clear and painful as ever.

Bex jumped as something hit her helmet. She blinked and lifted the visor to glare at Joker. "What the fuck?"

"Oh so you are still with us." He frowned. "I've been talking to you for the past ten minutes and got zero response. Thought you'd gotten in the pod and then died."

"Not funny."

He shook his head. "Wasn't fucking joking."

"So what do you want?"

"Nothing. Just…" He blew out a slow breath. "Thanks for saving my stupid ass."

"Bloody lucky I made it to you at all."

Joker cocked his head and stared at her for a long moment before he nodded slightly. "Right…. the fire thing."

Bex raised an eyebrow. "You know?"

"Barring interference, I hear everything that happens when you're groundside, especially in the Mako."

"Oh." She gave him a tight smile. "Thanks for interrupting my trip down memory lane."

"It's what I'm here for, interrupting unwanted situations. And don't worry, I was the only one, outside the squad, who heard your horror story on Therum."

She nodded once. "Thanks. Sorry about your arm."

"It's not the first time and it won't be the last."

Bex raised an eyebrow but changed the subject. "You have any idea where we're headed? Or if anybody received the distress signal you sent?"

Joker shrugged one shoulder, his other arm limp in his lap. "Hadn't gotten a response by the time you showed up, so I dunno. As for where, I—"

Twin pings on their omnitools made them both jump.

It was a message to the crew from the XO of the Orizaba:

Distress signal picked up by Fifth Fleet, will intercept pods at relay in Crescent Nebula.

"Guess that answers that question," Joker muttered.

Bex only hummed in response, her attention on a second message, this one from Hackett:

Are you alive? Please tell me you're all right. - Steven

Nerves all but shattered, she suppressed a sob as she sent a brief reply, little more than "I'm okay." She knew it wouldn't really satisfy his need for information, but for the moment, it would have to do. She was too mentally exhausted to do anything more than curl in on herself and try not to get lost in her memories again as the pod hurtled toward safety.

Bex jolted awake as the pod reached the rendezvous point. Outside the tiny window, she could just make out the shapes of the other pods, each one waiting for the one before it to dock with the Orizaba.

"How many do you think got out?" Joker asked.

Bex shook her head. "I don't want to think about it, or how many didn't ."

They sat in silence until their pod, the last pod, was pulled into the shuttle bay.

The pod door hissed open but neither Bex nor Joker moved. She wasn't sure about his reason, but she didn't want to face the reality of losing her crew, seeing with her own eyes how many had been left behind.

"Commander? Lieutenant?"

An unfamiliar voice cut through her thoughts a moment before a man she could only assume was the Orizaba's XO poked his head into the cramped space. He offered them both a tight smile.

"I cannot begin to tell you how relieved I am to see you both alive and, I assume, well."

"'Well' might be pushing it, Commander Fielding," Bex said, "but yes, we're alive."

Joker grunted but said nothing.

"Members of our medical staff are waiting to check you over," Fielding said, gesturing away from the pod, "whenever you're ready."

Bex nodded. "All right."

"Once you're cleared, there will be a debrief."

"Fine."

Internally, she groaned. That's all she bloody needed.

'What were you doing at the time of the incident?' 'Drinking, shootin' the shit with two of my officers.'

She heaved a sigh and glanced at Joker. "Shall we?"

He nodded once and gestured with his uninjured arm. "After you."

Bex hesitated a few seconds longer before she stepped out into the blissfully dim shuttle bay. Instantly surrounded by a small army of medics, she struggled against the urge to tear her own hair out—what little had regrown—as they shunted her into the elevator and along corridors until they finally reached the medbay.

Bex could feel a migraine forming almost immediately— unlike the rest of the ship, the medbay's lights were on at their brightest.

She shielded her eyes with her good arm as she looked around the room, taking in the extent of the injuries sustained by the rest of the crew, and noting which faces were missing.

Silence descended as she stepped into the room, still trying to shrug off the ever-persistent medics.

"I'll take her from here," Dr. Chakwas said, her tone brusque and weary at the same time.

The medics immediately tried to argue that she was a patient right now, she needed rest, surely this is against protocol—

"Damn protocol," she snapped. "It's a scan, not brain surgery. Go attend to…" She paused and frowned at Bex. "Where is Joker?"

"He's on his way," Bex said as the swarm finally dispersed and she felt like she could breathe again. "Slow going, y'know?"

Chakwas nodded. "I do. And you? How are you holding up under all that armor?"

Bex sank onto the nearest empty bed. "It's about all that is holding me up."

"How's your shoulder?"

"Fucked." Chakwas raised an eyebrow and Bex clarified. "Joker is only alive because I chucked him over my shoulder and stuffed us both in the pod."

"I see."

The medbay doors opened once more and Joker hobbled in, surrounded by another swarm of medics.

Bex hopped up immediately, freeing up both the bed and Dr. Chakwas' attention. She gave Joker a small nod before she began the rounds of the rest of the crew.

She took the time to talk to each of them in turn, ask how they were doing, if they needed anything, reassure them of… she wasn't really sure what, other than she would be available if they needed to talk.

"How are you?" Kaidan asked when she reached the corner where he leaned against the wall, leaving the beds for the rest of the crew.

A few were being treated for smoke inhalation but most were relatively unscathed, a burn here and there, a sprained ankle, nothing too serious.

"I'm—"

He held up a hand. "No bullshit, Bex. How are you really?"

She frowned. "I didn't say a goddamn word."

"Don't need you to say the words to know you're not okay."

She grumbled krogan obscenities under her breath. "If you know so goddamn much, then why ask?"

He shrugged. "It's what friends do."

"Yeah, yeah."

"Well?"

"I'm…" Bex leaned against the wall, wanting for all the world to slide down to the floor and curl up in a ball. "I'm scared, freaked the fuck out, pissed off, a bit in pain—Joker is not as light as he might look." She blew out a long slow breath. "Basically, I'm holding on by a fucking thread."

Kaidan nodded. "Sounds about right."

Bex glanced across the room as one of the Orizaba's officers walked into the room and called her name. She sighed and pushed off the wall. "Guess it's time to relive the nightmare."

"Good luck."

"See you in a few, yeah?"

She knew the debriefs would likely be individual or in pairs at most, but she had no intention of not being there when everyone else told their side of things. She needed answers. Who- or whatever had attacked them had taken Vido's long-held spot at the top of her Kill List.