01x01: Pilot

It's difficult to talk about her husband. It's difficult to even think about him these days. It hurts so much, but then Henry is really nice and he told her a secret about himself, so she feels she kinda owes him a story.

His look is almost challenging, like he does expect her to just shut down and tell him flat out she won't talk about him.

Henry Morgan and his strange persona have gotten under her skin. It's the reason why she's looked him up. He's weird and freaky, but somehow charming and oddly old-fashioned in some ways.

They don't really know each other and the reason she agreed to this non-date was because he wasn't actually asking her out. He says he's not interested in her and she thinks there might be or have been a woman he's hung up on. Maybe that's the real reason she agreed to come to this bar with him. Because they share this loss of a loved one.

Jo doesn't quite know what to make of him, but one thing she does know: he doesn't seem to have many friends and she thinks that's what they could be. Friends. She likes him, even though he creeps her out a little and talks in a weird way, but he's also nice and charming and treats her respectfully.

She wants to know more about him, which is a nice change because for a long time she hasn't cared for anyone. Her whole world hasn't made sense and didn't have any appeal in a very long time, but now there's someone who interests her and she doesn't have to fear he'll hit on her.

Then again, Henry Morgan is a damn good looking guy, he's charming and funny and she thinks there must definitely be something wrong with her that she feels relieved he hasn't shown any interest in her yet.

"And I just want it to go away," she tells him and it's true. She loved him so much, but now she feels like she's still-

"It won't," he cuts off her thoughts and she stares at him, disbelievingly because what's wrong with him? He is supposed to tell her it will go away soon and that she'll be alright again, but even if she's really stunned, she can't hide the small smile that threatens to overcome the corners of her mouth.

"Thank you. I feel so much better," she says sarcastically and he opens him mouth, grins at her and she can't help but grin herself.

Damn, he looks good when he smiles and she's so tired of feeling trapped in her own tragedy. She wasn't lying when she told him she wants those feelings for husband to go away.

She really wants them to vanish and to be able to feel something new. Something else, something nice and warm and soft. She wants to fall in love again and be with someone and not be this dark person inside.

Henry's still smiling into his glass and she thinks she wants to know how his smile tastes. It looks good and appealing, like all of him does, and she thinks something good like that can make her dark feelings go away, right?

Later, she'll tell herself and him that it's the stupid alcohol that made her lean over the table, take the glass out of his hand and press her lips against his.

He's shocked at first and doesn't react, but after a second, when her suddenly fogged mind tells her to apologize for being stupid and emotional, his hand gently cups her face and he kisses her back.

It's a soft kiss, really, really soft and it almost makes her want to cry. She was right. She doesn't feel dark anymore. She feels light and free like she hasn't felt for way too long.

Henry breaks away first and Jo's afraid to look at him, but he makes her. His touch is still soft and she doesn't think she can bear it if he looks at her with pity filling his eyes, but he doesn't.

Instead he looks a bit confused. "Maybe I was wrong," he says slowly. He seems deep in thoughts and if he tries solving a mystery in his head. "Maybe it gets better if you just engage yourself in something else than your pain. Maybe it gets better if you look forward instead of keeping looking backwards."

His gaze drops to her lips and suddenly her heart does a nervous jump in her chest, because what the hell just happened, but they are interrupted by her phone and she feels an odd sensation of both relief and disappointment.