A LITTLE LOVE...
Takes place in episode 3x01. I really do not like that Jane left Maura at the grave. So I am writing this the way I think Jane should have dealt with the situation. Please be warned there is angst but if you stick with me all will be happy and in the end there will be rizzles!
This is my first fanfic, actually my first every story full stop! So any reviews would be helpful!
Obviously I do not own the characters etc.
"I want to know something" Maura says, looking towards Paddy lying in the hospital bed. "Would you have shot her?" she asks, gesturing towards Jane.
"Hell yeah" Paddy whispers, struggling to keep his eyes open. "You're a cop." Paddy states to Jane.
Silence fills the room as Maura looks to Paddy and then up at Jane. Confusion hits her. Had she been so blind this whole time? Jane was right, she certainly had been naïve.
"I've got something I need to show you." Jane states moving towards Maura, interrupting Maura's thoughts.
Jane directs Maura to the grave she located earlier in the day.
Maura takes in the words etched into the tombstone.
"Baby Maura Doyle
Born August 7, 1976
Died August 7,1976
Safe from all earthly harm"
Maura breaks down reading the words, the realization hitting her that her "father" lied to her. Her so-called "father", the man that she is hating Jane for shooting. The man who is really the cause of their rift. The same man that has kept her from her birth mother for all these years.
"I always wondered why she didn't look for me." Maura sobs, still kneeling in front of her grave.
Jane looks down at Maura, wanting nothing more than to scoop her up in her arms and tell her everything is going to be okay. However, she realizes everything is not okay. Her best friend still hates her. She still hates herself for hurting Maura. Anger strikes her as she realizes too that Paddy is the real cause of all this pain. Even so, she has no idea how to fix their relationship.
"Is there anything I can do?" Jane offers weakly.
Maura shakes her head. There is too much pain an anger to process and she does not want to further damage their already broken friendship. "Please go." she requests, secretly hoping that Jane will not leave her side.
Jane stands idly for a moment, considering what she should do. On one hand she wants to give Maura the space she seems to want and need. On the other hand, how could she possibly leave the woman she loves heart-broken and sobbing in front of her own grave? 'The woman I love' Jane thinks to herself. It then becomes crystal clear what she needs to do.
Jane moves toward Maura, kneeling beside her.
Maura looks at Jane in confusion, waiting for Jane's next move.
"I realize that you probably have not forgiven me for shooting your father" she says, practically spitting out the last word in disgust. She inhales deeply to calm herself down. "and to be honest with you, I don't know if I have forgiven you yet for the harsh words you said to me."
Maura looks at Jane with tears in her eyes. Jane can't tell if that is regret in Maura's eyes or simply her still processing the grave in front of the both.
"But regardless of all that has happened over the last few days," Jane continues "you still are and always will be my best friend. I love you and there is no way in hell that I am leaving you here to process this by yourself. I would never forgive myself for doing that."
Jane places an arm around Maura's waist, pulling her close. Maura responds by placing her head on Jane's shoulder and starts sobbing again.
They stay there, silently kneeling in front of the grave for what feels like hours. As the sun starts to go down, Jane pulls herself off the ground offering Maura her hand. "Come on, I'll drop you home."
Maura looks up at Jane and places her hand in Jane's'. Jane pulls her up and into a warm embrace. They both sigh, realizing that whist things between them are not yet fixed, they both still care for each other.
The car ride back to Maura's house is silent. Both women digesting the events of the last few days. Both secretly wishing they had dealt with things differently. Both wishing they could fix the damage they had done.
They arrived at Maura's house to find Angela waiting at Maura's doorstep.
Jane sighs, realizing that she now has to get out of the car and will probably have to go into Maura's house when she so desperately wants to go home to cry herself to sleep.
"Oh hi Janie. I didn't expect to see you here!" Angela says excitedly, hoping the girls had made up.
"I was just dropping Maura home Ma. She had a rough day and I just wanted to make sure she got home safely okay?" Jane stated emphatically wanting her mother to understand that nothing had yet been fixed.
"Are you alright Angela?" Maura asked, desperately wanting to change the subject.
"Of course sweetie, why?" Angela replied distractedly, looking between Jane and Maura.
"Well you don't usually wait at my front door." Maura replied.
"Oh. Yes. Well I locked my keys in the guesthouse." Angela replied, looking at her feet in embarrassment.
"Ma! What did I tell you about not being a burden on Maura?!" Jane hissed.
"It's fine Angela, I have a spare key." Maura said sweetly. "I'll just go and get it." she continued whilst turning to Jane and shooting her a disapproving look.
Both Angela and Jane watched as Maura left. Jane sighed, trying to hold back her tears. She wanted nothing more than to sit with Maura, drink a beer and watch a movie tonight. She knew, however, that will probably not be happening for a long time yet, if ever.
"When are you two going to make up?" Angela asked turning towards Jane.
"Ma it's no..."
"None of my business" Angela interjected. "I know you truly believe that but your fight with Maura is affecting us all!"
"All of us who Ma?" Jane asked.
"Me, Frankie, Tommy, Vince and Barry. The list goes on Jane! Both you and Maura are two completely different people and we all have to deal with the fallout." Angela stated curtly, tired of having to deal with Jane's bad mood. "I feel like you are making me choose between you and Maura." Angela said, her eyes brimming with tears.
"I'm sorry Ma." Jane placed a hand on her mother's shoulder. "I do realize I have acted that way but please understand I do not want you to choose between Maura and me. Maura needs you just as much as I do right now, if not more."
"Oh Janie, so you do still care about her?" Angela asked looking up into Jane's eyes.
Maura was about to walk through the door as she heard Angela asking the question. She stood motionless, wanting to hear Jane's response.
"Of course I do Ma. She is my best friend. This is killing me!" Jane sobbed as her mother pulled her into her arms. "I lo..." Jane stopped herself before she professed her feelings for Maura to her mother.
"You what Janie?" Angela was determined to get to get Jane to confess what she had already known for so long.
"Nothing Ma. I need to go home. It's been a long day. Please say goodnight to Maura for me?" Jane walked away before she received a response.
Both Angela and Maura sighed to themselves, disappointed that Jane did not finish her confession.
Once Maura heard Jane start the engine of her car, she walked back outside to Angela and handed her the spare key.
Angela thanked her and went to collect her key that she has locked in the house.
She then walked back into the main house to hand Maura back the spare key. She saw Maura looking at photos of her and Jane smiling and cuddling. Angela looked up at Maura to see a lone tear falling down her cheek. Walking over to Maura, she wrapped her arms around her, pulling her in for a tight embrace, much like she did with Jane earlier in the night. The similarity was not lost on Maura.
"You should be looking after Jane, not me Angela" Maura said defeatedly.
"Jane specifically asked me to look after you Maura" Angela replied softly.
"She did?" Tears were now streaming down Maura's face. How could she have treated Jane in such a horrible manner? Some best friend she was! Yet Jane, her Jane still hurting, made sure Maura was looked out for. 'My Jane' Maura thought to herself.
"She always has been yours Maura, but neither of you have realized that yet." Maura felt her cheeks flush as she realized she had verbalized her thoughts.
"I...I..."Maura Took in a deep breath and dropped her shoulders in defeat. "I pushed her away Angela. She could never be mine now."
"That is completely untrue Maura and I think you know it. You two have both hurt each other so much and yet I can tell you both still love each other very much. Jane is scared Maura but she does love you."
"I know" Maura state succinctly. "What I don't know is how to fix the damage to our relationship."
"I think you just need to sit down with Jane and talk through all your thoughts and feelings."
"Maybe you are right." Maura stating, rising from her seat and grabbing her car keys front the kitchen counter.
"But not tonight honey" Angela said as she placed her hand over Maura's encouraging her to place the keys back on the counter. "You have both had a big day and need some rest before you talk."
"I suppose you are right" Maura replied as she yawned. "Goodnight Angela."
"Goodnight Maura."
"Oh and Angela" Maura called out as Angela opened the door to leave.
"Yes dear" Angela turned to face Maura.
"Thank you. For everything."
"You are most welcome darling. You know you are like a daughter to me." Angela offered with a sweet smile as she closed the door behind her.
"One day I hope" Maura whispered to herself as she walked towards her bedroom. "One day."
To be continued...