Disclaimer: I don't own Avatar: The Last Airbender, Legend of Korra, their concepts, or their characters. No money is being made out of this.
A/N: This is a sequel of sorts to my other Zuko + kid!Lin fluff fic, Pretty. That was written before we ever knew Suyin existed, but hopefully it still fits in the timeline.
Toph looks thoroughly exhausted, which Zuko has only seen a handful of times in his life, and most of them weren't pleasant.
"I'm fine," she insists impatiently, voice half-muffled by the pillows she's just thrown herself onto. A nearby Katara, busy cooing at the new baby, doesn't seem worried, so Zuko shuts up. For now. "I'm just tired as fuck. I'll never understand how people so tiny can be so demanding."
"Language," Katara warns.
"Who cares? She's like three days old, she doesn't know what 'fuck' means."
"Actually, babies become aware of their surroundings since the womb," Katara explains, and Zuko decides her bossiness is strangely comforting. Like old times, maybe. Like a fuzzy idea of home.
"Then she's heard worse. Damage's done."
Katara sighs. "Poor baby," she says, gently patting the back of an oblivious Suyin. "Ironic you should say that," she teases, more loudly, "considering how demanding a tiny person you've always been." Zuko snorts.
"I'm not demanding, I'm a bitch," comes the sleepy, muffled reply.
Katara looks at him and jerks her head in the direction of the door; Zuko stands, intending to let Toph get some much-needed sleep. Katara's already stepped out of the room when he hears a firm, "Zuko, wait." Closing the door, he moves back to his previous seat by the bed. Toph doesn't say anything for a while, but he can tell by the downward curve of her mouth that something's on her mind and she's trying to find the words. He's distracted hoping it's not anything mushy when she clears her throat. "I…it's about Lin. I don't really––" She sighs. When she continues, it's in her gruff, police chief tone. "Can you talk to her? She's being weird about it."
"About it?"
"You know, about the baby. All this," she gestures vaguely at herself and the general direction in which Katara left with Suyin. "She's been weird for a while, but it's worse now that her sister's actually here."
"Oh. Weird how?"
"Stand-offish. Aggressive even." Zuko hums his understanding. "Look, I'm not stupid, I know this is probably a tough time for her. It's not like I expected it to be a bed of roses – though it would have been nice for things to be easy for a change."
"Tell me about it," he says, his tone neutral. "But they're not, are they."
"No. And I…you and I both know I'm not the best parent in the world, and if I try to talk to her I'll just make it worse. I'm not good at this shit."
Zuko considers challenging her statement about her parenting abilities, but decides not to. "What the hell makes you think I am?" he asks instead.
"I don't; you're one of the most awkward people I know," Toph says in a matter-of-fact tone.
"Thanks. I'll be going then," he deadpans, moving to stand. She grabs his arm and pulls him back down.
"BUT," she forcefully continues, "you have a way with her. Or something. She cares about you a lot."
Zuko's glad she can't see his blushing – though she's probably aware of his discomfort anyway. He snorts. "'Or something' is right. I'm sure Aang could do a much better job than me. You know how close they are."
"I'm sure he could comfort her in some ways, but…I don't know," she sighs, shaking her head. "This is family stuff…Aang never had a family. He never had to deal with parents and siblings and all that shit. I never had siblings myself, so even if I were better at this I feel like I wouldn't be able to fully empathize."
"Sounds pretty perceptive of her feelings and needs for someone who's 'not good at this shit'."
"Shut up."
"Aang has three kids though," Zuko continues. "He does have some experience with sibling relationships."
Toph scoffs at that. "Let's just say I've got several issues with the way Aang handles sibling rivalry among his kids."
Zuko sighs. Trust Toph to tap into his deepest insecurities and bully him into facing them. Then he thinks of Lin, hiding somewhere, feeling alone and unwanted, and feels a pang of sympathy in his chest. "Fine, I'll do it. Do you know where she is? I haven't seen her since we arrived."
"She's been hiding on the roof."
"You can sense her?"
Toph shrugs. For a moment, Zuko wonders if Lin realizes her mother can sense her and if so, whether she's waiting for Toph herself to comfort her. Then it makes him sad, so he stops wondering. He's spent too long already meditating on parents and children, on dysfunction and happiness, on loving people who are flawed in very deep ways, and on deserving to be loved despite one's own flaws. We're all doing the best we can, he tells himself for the umpteenth time, and tries to believe it even though it never truly works.
She's shivering when he finds her, which only makes the pang in his chest ache worse. She jumps a little when he wraps his coat around her and sits next to her, but otherwise doesn't react. She has the same obstinate look he's seen so many times on her mother; the same crease in her brow, the same downward curve of her lips. Lin's got a lot of pride for a six-year-old, but Zuko knows well the type of conditions that breed pride into a child so it doesn't surprise him. They're silent for a moment, then he gathers his courage.
"Hey, kid."
He sees the moment her pride deflates; the attention is too big a temptation. "Hey, Uncle Zuko."
"A little chilly up here, don't you think?"
"Uh-uh."
"Okay."
Zuko adjusts his breathing in order to radiate enough warmth for the both of them. The wind is colder up there, but soon they're more comfortable and Lin visibly relaxes against his side.
"Have you seen your baby sister?"
"No."
"How come?" Lin shrugs. "You don't want to see her?" Lin shakes her head. "You sure? She's really cute. Almost as cute as you were when you were a baby."
She looks up at that. "Really?"
"Yep. Looks a lot like her big sister, too. Same eyes and everything."
Lin gives a tiny smile before her face falls and she hides it against his arm. Zuko sighs inwardly, trying to think of ways to engage her that won't directly touch what's touchy.
"You know," he says finally, "I'm a big brother too."
"You are?" Zuko hums his confirmation. "Do you have a little sister too?"
"I do."
Lin frowns in a very suspicious manner. "How come I've never met her?"
"Well," he starts, hesitating. "She…she's done some bad things. And a lot of the time she doesn't feel very well. So she doesn't get out much."
"Oh. What's her name?"
"Azula."
"That sounds a little like Zuko. The 'zu' part."
Zuko smiles. "That's true. Sometimes parents do that, I guess. Like you and Suyin share the 'in' part."
Lin says nothing to that, but she's quiet for a few moments. Then: "Were you my age when Azula was born?"
"No, I was just two years old."
"That's really little."
"Yeah," Zuko says, amused at her remark.
"Do you remember what it was like before she came?"
Zuko thinks for a moment. "No, I don't. She was just always there."
Lin sighs. "I do. It was better."
"But you haven't even met her. How do you know that for sure?"
"I can hear her," Lin deadpans, side-eyeing him, and it's all Zuko can do not to laugh. "It just was."
Zuko was quiet for an awkward moment, searching his mind for what to say to her. I know how you feel and sometimes it doesn't ever get better and you just get screwed over a lot and end up in a lot of pain throughout the years somehow didn't feel like it would quite do the trick. "Well. Sometimes…usually it really sucks when things change. It always feels like it was better before. But afterward you realize it wasn't that bad, and you...adapt to the change and sometimes you get happier."
Lin shoots him an appropriately doubtful look. He doesn't blame her.
Her tone is almost shy when she speaks again. "Did you ever…feel really bad things about Azula?"
"Like what?" he speculates.
"Like that she's really stupid and annoying and you hate her? And you wish your mom didn't just care about her now?"
Bingo. Zuko doesn't miss a beat. "All the time."
Lin looks up at him, eyes wide. "Really?"
"Yeah." He doesn't mention that his sister is an actual psychopath, but he figures it's more important to validate Lin's feelings right now. "I spent a lot of my childhood being sad that my father paid more attention to her than me. And I always felt like she was better than me at everything and that I had the worst luck in the world to have her as my sister."
She thinks about it for a moment. "Do you still feel like that?"
"No," he says, sighing. "I feel really bad for her now and I take care of her. I wish all the time that things were better and we'd been able to be a real family. In a way, we're all each other has."
"Do you think one day my sister will be all I have?" Lin whispers after a moment. Zuko swallows, trying to ignore the fuck you made it worse you made it worse chant going on inside his head.
"No, I don't think so. You'll have me, and your Uncle Aang, and your Aunt Katara, and Tenzin, and everyone else. But I think family is really precious, and that you're lucky to have one that's a little bigger now." Lin is silent, so he continues. "Your mom doesn't care only about Su now, it's just that Su's a little baby, and little babies need a lot of attention or they die. She's not big and strong like you yet; she's got a long way to go. And your mom gets really tired taking care of her. That's why Aunt Katara is here – to help her."
"Did mom get tired when I was a baby?" Lin asks hopefully.
"Of course! You were an even bigger handful."
"I was?"
"Yeah." Zuko has no memory of how tired Toph was or wasn't when Lin was born, but thankfully her Earthbending isn't nearly advanced enough for her to know when people are lying. He enjoys that while it lasts.
"Well, I'm big now. I'm not a baby like Suyin," Lin declares.
"No, you're not. You're her big sister. And one day she'll look up to you and want to be just like you."
"Really?"
"Specially when you're a master Earthbender like your mom."
"And Metalbender!"
"And Metalbender." Zuko decides he has no idea what he's doing anyway so he'll risk saying it: "How about we go inside and get something to eat? Aunt Katara made cookies." Lin widens her eyes and nods vigorously. Zuko stands and helps her fit her arms into the sleeves of his coat, which looks ridiculously huge on her but it doesn't matter. He finds her hand underneath several folds of fabric and takes it in his as they walk back downstairs. "Then, if you want, you can see your sister. But only if you want to. Is that okay?"
"Okay, Uncle Zuko."