Me: even at this agonizing pace, I'll still finish the story before Valve makes a new Half-Life.

Valve:

The Persistence of Memory
Extra Story: Notes from the Silver Garden
Act V – The Girl Who Sold The World, Part Two

Somewhere in the distance, a pin drops.

"I'm not sure if my feelings are exactly like yours, but I know I've never felt this way about anyone except you." Madoka is blushing. "And I don't want to live in a world that doesn't have you in it."

Homura's dark welter of emotion is swept aside by an overpowering panic. "You can't," she pleads. "You can't love me, I'm a monster! A selfish liar who betrayed everyone!" Once more she tries to wrest herself from Madoka's hands. "Listen to Junko-san! Don't waste your – unf!"

Suddenly she's flat on her back, pinned by her upper arms. Madoka swings a leg over and straddles her waist, the movements coming too quick to react. The last thing Homura sees is a look of determination on Madoka's face.

Her first kiss has a faint taste of peach lip gloss. It's warm and soft and takes her breath away.

Madoka is anything but breathless. "If anyone says it's wrong to care for you, I'll tell them they're wrong every time." Her radiance at this moment surpasses even her ultimate form. "It doesn't matter if you're a witch or a devil or anything else, as long as you're still you... So please, don't feel like you're not good enough or that you can't be with me."

Homura stares at her, lost for words. Was the kiss not Madoka's first as well? Why would she squander it, sully herself so rashly? These questions are left unspoken as the full import of the goddess's vow sinks in. Realization comes, devastating in its cold, merciless clarity.

Because I kept you waiting.

At last Homura understands what the others knew all along. Madoka tried to tell her when they first reunited, but she was too distraught to heed it. Sayaka told her the same, but she spurned the mermaid's counsel. The assumption which shaped her actions since her rebirth is fatally flawed. The end she desires and the means she pursues are fundamentally incompatible.

Madoka's true happiness cannot be attained at a distance.

"Homura-chan?" Madoka bends down as the girl beneath her begins to shed fresh tears. "What is it? Are you still hurting?"

It's not a pain of the body which afflicts Homura now. "I'm so sorry," she says, her voice barely more than a whisper. "All this time, you were... and I've been..!"

Madoka lifts her hand and gently wipes the wetness from the devil's cheek. "It's all right. You've been doing your best."

"It's not all right," Homura insists. "I was so blind, so stupid, and now... now I don't know what to do!"

"You don't have to do anything," Madoka assures her. "Is there anything you'd like to do?"

"I don't know." All she can think of is the plan she had, before the foundations were knocked out from under her. That which so troubled her now becomes a lifeline. "The movie, do you still want to..?"

"I think that would be nice," the goddess replies. "But it's okay if you'd rather do something different."

Homura shakes her head. "It's fine. I'll make us a shortcut."

She looks inward and grasps her sanctum by its intangible edges, dragging the map across the territory as Madoka rises and smooths out her clothes. When Homura opens her eyes, she finds an outstretched hand ready to help her up. The devil takes it and gets to her feet. A gesture to one side completes her work, making a wooden door appear where it has no business being.

"Wait a moment, your hair's gotten tangled." Madoka steps behind Homura and carefully runs her fingers through the long dark tresses. Homura keeps very, very still until she's finished. "That's better. Are you ready to go?"

Is she? Beyond the door lies an uncertain path. Part of Homura wants to trust Madoka. Part of her fears what might happen if she does. Madoka's affection is not like the broken, corrupted thing she carries inside herself. If there's any chance it could...

"Homura-chan?"

Words tumble out, clumsy yet honest. "What if you're wrong about me?"

Madoka hugs her, pulling their bodies together without reservation. "If I were, we wouldn't be here now." She places a hand on the devil's back and slowly rubs in a broad circle. "You always believed in me, Homura-chan. Won't you believe a little more?"

The scales of hope and doubt balance on a knife edge. Homura shuts her eyes tight, blocking out everything except Madoka's warmth, Madoka's scent. "Promise you'll stop me if I do something wrong?"

"I'm sure that won't happen," Madoka answers. "But I promise."

For a moment more, the balance wavers... and then falls on the side of hope. "All right," Homura breathes. "I think... I think I'm ready." Withdrawing from the embrace, she reaches out and grips the doorknob. "Come on."

With its massive facade of curved glass on a wood and steel frame, the mall is one of downtown Mitakihara's most distinctive fixtures. Like many of the new city's landmarks, it was designed in homage to a foreign original: a department store in Köln, Germany. It's a popular hangout among Madoka's peers, and a place Homura also knows well.

Even so, trepidation shadows her as she and Madoka slip out of an alley down the street. They've come together before, but not with... romantic intentions. Just thinking about it gets Homura's pulse up. Madoka loves her. Madoka kissed her. Things are happening that she never thought possible, the familiar order turned on its head.

"Ah, there's Sayaka-chan!" Madoka waves. "Sayaka-chaaan!"

Sayaka stands near one of the side entrances, wearing a yellow polo shirt and baggy black plaid shorts. She waves back. "Hi guys," the blue-haired girl calls. "You're just in time!"

Madoka hastens towards her, Homura close behind. "Have you heard from Kyouko-chan?"

"She texted me. Should be here any minute." Sayaka must have noticed how her friends arrived together, but doesn't comment. "I got one from Mami-san, too. Everything's quiet over there."

"That's great," says Madoka. "It's really nice of her and Akayama-san to look after things for us."

"Sure is," Sayaka agrees. "Listen, could I borrow Homura for a second?"

"Eh? Sure, I guess."

Homura has an idea of what's coming: admonition or exhortation, and she's not in the mood for either. Regardless, she dutifully follows until she and Sayaka are several paces from Madoka. "What is it?" the devil asks.

Sayaka gives her a worried look. "Are you okay? You look kind of under the weather."

"I'm..." Homura nearly said she's fine, but neither of them would believe that. "I'm all right," she amends. "I had some heart trouble earlier. Madoka helped me."

"Heart trouble?" Sayaka frowns. "You're not overdoing it, are you? Let us know if you need a break."

"That won't be necessary. I've taken care of the problem." Homura has no wish to discuss it further. "Was there anything else you needed?"

"Yeah." Madoka's angel takes a breath. "Okay, look. I know we don't always see eye to eye, but right now I want you to know I'm cheering for you. Okay?"

It's not what Homura expected to hear, even from the Sayaka who makes such efforts to get along with her. "I... appreciate that," she fumbles. "I trust you and Kyouko will enjoy yourselves as well."

Sayaka smiles. "Count on it," she replies. "By the way, I think Madoka has something to tell you later, so don't take off as soon as the credits roll – "

At that moment a red shape rises up from behind and a pair of hands cover her eyes. Kyouko announces herself with a poor imitation of Shizuki Hitomi's airy upper-class speech. "Guess who?"

The smile widens into a grin. "Ooh, let me think." Sayaka puts a finger on her bottom lip in mock concentration. "Could it possibly be... Sir Thomas Beecham?"

"Huh?" Kyouko lowers her hands. "Who's that?"

Sayaka spins around. "Who's that?" she repeats indignantly. "He founded the Royal Philharmonic Orchestra! I've played his recordings for you!"

Kyouko shrinks from her vehemence. "I thought I was just supposed to listen to the music," the redhead protests. "You didn't say I have to remember the guy's name, you dummy!"

"Dummy?" Sayaka steps forward, bearing down with the intensity of an outraged aficionado. "Dummy!? I'm not the one who showed up for a date with chocolate on her face!"

Although Homura doesn't see any chocolate, Kyouko's response tells all. "No way!" she gasps in genuine horror. "I missed a spot? Where?"

Sayaka raises a hand. "Don't move," she commands. "It's riiiiight..." Her finger flicks the tip of Kyouko's nose. "There."

"Why, you..! I'll get you for that!" Kyouko lunges at Sayaka, who dodges. Carefree laughter rings out as the chase takes them back to Madoka.

Madoka also laughs, though concern tempers her amusement. "Kyouko-chan, you really shouldn't eat chocolate for breakfast..."

Distracted, Kyouko gives up the pursuit. "I had an apple too. That's fine, isn't it?"

"It's not fine," Sayaka retorts. "Don't worry, Madoka. I'll make sure this blockhead gets a proper dinner." She strikes a pose and points to the mall entrance. "But first we're gonna have fun! Come on, Homura!"

Homura joins the group, hoping the flirting duo are done making fools of themselves in public. She notices Kyouko has combined her usual denim cutoffs with sneakers and a green t-shirt from a rock band called Strange Magnet. It's easier on the eyes than Sayaka's apparel.

Kyouko catches the devil looking at her. "I don't really have chocolate on me," she says in an undertone. "Do I?"

Cold, conditioned air washes over Homura's skin as the doors open automatically. "You don't."

The automated kiosk hums and whirs and ejects four paper slips into a little tray. Sayaka scoops them up. "There we go. One for you, one for you, one for me, and one for you."

There are bigger, fancier cinemas in Mitakihara, but the mall's multiplex annex benefits greatly from its convenient location. It tends to be especially crowded on Sundays and this is no exception. Sayaka planned accordingly, ordering in advance to guarantee seats. Now it's just a matter of getting there before the good ones are gone.

The girls form a line and present their tickets to the usher at the entrance to the lobby. Once inside, Kyouko immediately heads for the concession stands. Sayaka makes to follow her. "We'll catch you later," she tells the others. "At the escalators, right?"

Madoka nods. "Mm-hm. See you there."

"Wait a minute," Homura interrupts. "I thought... Aren't we all going in together?"

"Eh? Sayaka-chan didn't tell you?"

Sayaka slaps her forehead. "Oh man, I totally forgot! Kyouko wanted to see Captain Supermarket versus Necron Prime, so I switched our tickets." She glances over her shoulder. "I gotta go keep an eye on her. Let me know if Swan Lake is good, okay?"

"We will," replies Madoka. "Do you want anything from the stands, Homura-chan?"

"Er, no." Homura's appetite has been absent all morning and it's not coming back now. "No, thank you. You go ahead."

The auditorium is semi-lit when the girls slip inside, the projector running an advertisement for car insurance. Madoka has a bag of gummy bears. Homura has a stomach of butterflies. About half the seats remain unfilled, including a perfect set midway down the center aisle's right side.

Madoka heads straight to them. "How's this?" she asks in a whisper. "Not too close?"

"It's fine. Take whichever you like."

Madoka chooses the second one in, leaving the aisle seat free. Homura lowers herself into it and does her best to get comfortable as the previews begin. First up is a sequel to a comedy she's never seen. Next comes a Meiji period romance. Third in line offers some action... Homura shifts, trying to improve her posture. She puts her hands on the armrests only to find one of them already occupied. Before she can pull back, Madoka's fingers entwine with her own.

Ba-dump.

Slowly, very slowly, Homura turns and sees the one she loves smiling at her in the dancing glow of the silver screen.

"Fate/chalice helix," a recorded voice narrates. "In theaters October Thirtieth."

She looks so happy.

"...And then wham!" Kyouko gestures excitedly, drawing looks from patrons riding the escalators behind her. "Oldsmobile right through the wall!"

"You thought that was the best part? Not the trick with the spatula?" Sayaka shakes her head. "Jeez... So what about you guys? Was it good?"

Madoka nods. "I liked it a lot. The costumes and movements were done really well. Don't you think, Homura-chan?"

The first two and a half acts are all a big blur to Homura. "It was... not bad," she hedges. "I think Sayaka would like – "

Just then she feels a buzz in her pocket. Kyouko reacts as well, giving a clue to who's texting before Homura even gets her phone out. "It's Mami," Kyouko confirms, reading the message on her own screen. "She's outside with Akayama-kun. They haven't seen any trouble."

"Why don't we meet up with them for lunch?" suggests Madoka brightly. "It's almost noon, isn't it?"

Sayaka likes this proposal. "Hey, good idea. We can finally meet the newbie."

Kyouko nods in agreement, leaving Homura to cast the final vote. "Would that be okay, Homura-chan?" Madoka asks.

Homura has no practical reason to object. "If you want to, then I don't mind."

"Great." Kyouko thumbs out a reply and sends it off with a little flourish. A new missive comes back almost immediately. "Okay, Mami's in. Let's find seating for six."

With the girls packed three to a side in a cream-colored food court booth, lunch gets off to a strong start. Mami presides, beaming with pride as Chie does her best to make a good impression. Madoka and Sayaka both take a quick liking to Mitakihara's newest guardian, while even Homura has to admit the earnest novice presents herself well. For her own part, the devil eats sparingly and lets others do the talking.

It's not long before talk leads to action. Sayaka dips a French fry in ketchup, but instead of putting it in her mouth, she turns to her right and holds it out to Kyouko. "Say 'ahh.'"

Kyouko snaps it up like a dog getting bacon. Gone in a flash. "Mmm!"

"Oh, come on!" Sayaka tries to look stern. "That wasn't cute at all!"

The redhead licks her lips and grins. "I couldn't help it. The love was too tasty."

"...Really?"

"Really." Kyouko plunges one of her own fries into a glob of mayonnaise. "Here, you try."

Sayaka obliges. "Hmm... I don't know. I might need another."

"Okay, but I get one too!"

Across the table, Homura begins to feel uneasy. It's one thing to be affectionate, but these two should think about where they are and what sort of example they're setting. She's on the verge of speaking up when she catches a motion in the corner of her eye.

"Here you go, Homura-chan." Madoka holds her offering out a little further. "Say 'ahh!'"

Homura looks from the morsel to Madoka and back again. Knows the others are watching, waiting to see how she responds. She saw this acted out a thousand times on a hospital television, even dared to imagine how it might feel. Now it's actually happening and what she feels is her hands sweating and her limbs turning to lead. For a long moment, willing herself to move seems a task Herculean... But then she sees the hope shining in Madoka's eyes and everything else fades away.

"See?" says Kyouko. "I told you she could do it."

"I never doubted." Sayaka sounds just a tiny bit proud. "That was all you."

"Now, now, you two. Let them have their moment." Mami smiles over Madoka's shoulder. "Is it good?"

"It's fine." Homura catches herself too late. "I mean it is good." She swallows. "Really."

No one marks the mistake. Nor do they grant her any peace. "Now you do it," Sayaka decrees, feeding Kyouko another fry.

Of course. Having given, Madoka naturally wants to receive in turn. Homura looks down at the plain, scarcely touched pile next to the hot dog on her tray. She picks one that isn't too large or small, with no blemishes, and reaches for a little white packet.

"Do something special." Kyouko dunks a fresh fry without taking her eyes off the prize. "Put a spell on it."

The devil stops, about to tear open the ketchup. "Spell?"

"Yeah! Something like 'Love-Love Delicious Beam!'" Kyouko waves her hands like she's casting a spell herself... right when her girlfriend leans over to sneak a bite.

"Augh!" Sayaka recoils, colliding with Chie's shoulder. Chie's club sandwich slips from her fingers and collapses into a jumbled mound as Sayaka snatches up a napkin. "Kyoukooooo!"

"Huh? Whatcha – "

"Yu stug id ub by doze!" Sayaka blows frantically. "You dingus!"

"Oh no! Sayaka-chan, are you all right?" Madoka offers her own napkin. "Here, use this."

"Thanks." Accepting the clean square, the blue-haired girl wipes a mayo smear off her lip. "Kyouko, what the heck?"

Her tone puts Kyouko reflexively on the defensive. "It's my fault? How was I supposed to – "

"Ahem." Mami gives them both a look. "Akayama-san, do you need another sandwich?"

Chie looks as if she'd rather fade into the furniture. The avalanche missed her shirt, a warm blue Henley that matches her eyes, but her potato salad has been smothered by turkey scraps and shredded lettuce. "Um... I think I'll just have it open-face."

Armed with a plastic fork, she starts moving ham and tomato slices onto an intact piece of toast. Madoka takes a couple more napkins from the spare stack and passes one to Sayaka. Homura, her patience fraying, glares at Kyouko. "Are you finished?"

Kyouko deflates, slouching in her seat. Responsibility for her actions seems to have sunk in, or perhaps it's the specter of wasted food which quells her fighting spirit. "Yeah," she mumbles. "Sorry, Sayaka, Akayama-kun."

"It's okay," Chie answers, definitely eager to move on. She picks up the first part of her remade sandwich and takes a big bite. "Shee? Shtill good."

Sayaka's going the same way. "I guess I did walk right into that," she admits. "Or lean into it. Call it even for this morning?"

Kyouko nods. "You wanna wash your face? I'll go with you to the restroom."

Homura tunes them out as they get up and leave, focusing on the ketchup packet which never left her fingers. One careful tear at the marked corner, then over to the chosen fry...

"Will Sakura-san and Miki-san be all right?" Chie sounds a little nervous.

"That's just how they are," Mami replies. "They squabble and then forget about it."

Madoka sips her diet soda. "You don't have to worry. Even if they act like that, Sayaka-chan and Kyouko-chan are really devoted to each other."

...And a slight squeeze to get the ketchup flowing. Homura moves her hand a millimeter at a time, drawing a crimson bead down the fry's length. At the end she makes a clean break and drops the packet on her tray. "Madoka, if you'd like..?"

"Oh!" Madoka certainly would like. Turning in place, she takes a second to straighten her clothes before leaning forward. "Ahhh..!"

Homura's heartbeat starts climbing again as she inches her hand closer. Her chest feels tight, constricted, like it did before the heart attack. But she can't stop now, not after coming this far. Just a little more...

"Mm." Madoka closes her eyes, chewing slowly. "Mmmmm..."

Homura lets out the breath she didn't know she was holding. "Is... is it all right?"

"Oh, Homura-chan." Madoka glows with rosy-cheeked joy. "It's wonderful."