Title: You're the One with the Cavalier Smile

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Author's Note: Some angst inspired by 3x02. Title based off the song "One Night Town" by Mat Kearney & Ingrid Michaelson.

"Your turn."

Felicity barely looks up from her tablet as she replies back to Roy. "I told you, I just want to watch Captain America again. I'm not changing my mind-"

"No," Roy interrupts with an eyeroll. "Although, jeez, how many times do you have to see this guy shirtless?" When Felicity opens her mouth to answer, he waves a hand in front of her, and continues with, "Not that. Your turn to be honest with the boss man." He jerks his head in the direction of where Oliver is sharpening his arrows in the back.

Felicity sighs, putting aside her tablet to turn pleading eyes towards Roy. "Do I have to?"

"Felicity..."

"Fine," she grumbles as she shuts down her monitors. "But, for the record, I hate when you throw my own words back at me. Not cool."

"Noted," Roy says with a smile. "See you tonight?"

"See you tonight," she call after him as he heads to the back door to leave. "Don't forget cheesy fries!"

After the door closes behind him, she looks at Oliver who is still in deep concentration with the task at hand. His gaze is focused on his machines, his hands steady as he runs through the routine he's perfected, the labor of his task allowing him to produce the arrows he can claim as his and his alone. This is his handiwork, the signature he leaves as he tries to make the world a better place, even as his world is dark and gray.

Despite his concentration, when she takes a few steps towards him, purse in hand so she can leave right after, he looks up immediately. He turns off his machine and removes his safety goggles, looking at her in rapt attention, his eyes brightening with a mixture of happiness and sadness. She doesn't know what to name the emotion that's a mix of both, but it's all she sees in his eyes lately any time they lock gazes.

"Hey."

"Hi," he answers back softly. "How was your day?"

"Fine. Good," she says quickly. "Just, you know, boring IT stuff."

"Good." He nods at her warmly as if he's happy to hear it, but again, that lingering of sadness cannot escape his gaze. "Everyone at the company welcoming you back okay?"

Felicity nods offhandedly at the question instead of telling him the truth, which is that most people think she had slept her way to the top and is now slumming it back to the IT Department since Oliver is gone. Her colleagues barely talk to her, she eats lunch alone, and the only person who talks to her willingly is Hank the security guard.

But she doesn't tell him any of that. That's not what she has to talk to him about.

"I have to tell you something," she blurts out. Of course she does, because how else would she begin this horribly awkward conversation other than just barging into it? "And it's dumb and I shouldn't have to tell you. I mean, you're not my dad or my brother or-" Her eyes widen at what she's said, as she recalls the feel of his lips on her in a hospital room just weeks ago, and he looks at her in barely contained horror too. Well, his eyebrows have risen dangerously higher than usual which must mean that he agrees the family relationships do not apply to their relationship. Quickly, she tries to backtrack.

"I mean, obviously you're not like my brother, because you know, that's be really gross and all, like ew, but..." She takes a deep breath, and she calms herself down. She remembers a fleeting kiss that happened at too wrong a moment, but she also remembers a conversation held right here, about a man who was waiting to die in this cave even as she aches to get out. She remembers Sara, how Sara was a canary who flew so high so fearlessly... until she could fly no more.

"But you're my friend," Felicity tells him. "You're still my friend so that's why, that's why I'm telling you."

Oliver stares at her, digesting the words no matter how painful they may be, as if he's back on the island and they're all the food he can find in a field full of poisonous berries. "Okay," he says slowly, urging her to continue. "And what are you telling me?"

"I... I'm seeing someone," she says. When she sees Oliver wince in pain, she can't help but add the words, "Sort of," as if to soften the blow. Because even after all this, she hates to cause Oliver pain, even by telling him the truth.

But most of the time, the truth is what he needs to hear most.

He nods at her words, looking down at the table where his freshly sharpened arrows lay, his fingers reaching for them as if that pain would hurt less than her words.

"It's just coffee... for now," Felicity continues, twisting her fingers nervously as her heart pounds in the silent foundry. "He pays for the coffee, I don't make the coffee, because, you know, that's just not something I do. But, he's... he's really great and it's growing into something, and I just, I wanted you to hear it from me first, as a friend."

"Right." He swallows back words and emotion as he stares at her, memorizing every angle of her face and remembering her in candlelight at an Italian restaurant, on a night that had ended too soon.

"I mean, I'm sure you don't even care, I mean, it was just one date, or, well, half a date," Felicity says with a shrug, too aware of the medic table over her shoulder, the one she'd woken up on after her concussion, the one Sara had been laid on in a stillness that was so unlike her. "We didn't even get to dessert. Half a date, really, and one kiss..." Her voice trails off and she clears her throat when Oliver looks at her, his eyes more alive than she's seen them all week. "Not much in the grand scheme of your dating history, I'm sure, not even a blip on the radar, but, I... I figured I should tell you before the guys let it slip."

That makes Oliver furrow his brow in confusion. "Digg knows? And Roy?"

She cringes at what she revealed accidentally, but has no choice but to face her words now. "Yeah. Sorry, I was just, I wanted to tell you at the right time, out of respect."

"You respect me," he repeats bitterly. "That's great to know."

His voice sounds so cold, so unlike the man who'd looked into her eyes at dinner and remembered the details of their first meeting. She takes a step back in surprise, taken aback at the vigilante tone, shaking her head to clear the frost in the air. "Oliver-"

"No, Felicity, it's fine. It's- I'm happy for you. I just... I just want you to be happy." And this time, Oliver is back, Oliver Queen, the one she recognizes from long nights in the foundry, and dinners at Big Belly, the voice over the comms at night. The man who'd seduced her with his words and his memories over a dish of spaghetti and garlic bread that she hadn't even gotten to touch before the restaurant collapsed around them. But the way that Oliver looked at her, wishing her nothing but good things, hoping he was a good thing for her, that's the way he's looking at her now.

So she accepts it graciously with a nod, resolutely not feeling guilty, resolutely telling herself that a fake love confession during a battle to save the city and a reverse love confession in a hospital room does not a relationship make.

It does not a relationship make.

Right?

"Thank you. And..." She tries one more time because no matter what, she is his friend and she cares about her friend. "For what it's worth, I think you deserve better than this place, Oliver. Sara would you want to have more. I hope you'll believe that one day."

She doesn't give him a chance to respond, having said her piece and needing to flee, needing some space from this room that has been sucking the air out of her with the way it's draining the life out of the people she loves. She's almost at the door when he calls out.

"Uh, who is it? The guy?" Oliver asks offhandedly, his voice feigning for casual even as his posture remains rigid, the fingers of his bow hand doing that nervous tick that gives him away every time.

"Oh. Ray, Ray Palmer," Felicity answers.

She thinks she sees Oliver's eyes widen, his jaw tightening as he stares at her, but he controls his emotion. He merely nods, and responds with, "Oh. I didn't know that you two were- oh."

"It just... happened," Felicity explains lamely. "He's really smart, he went to Harvard. And he's doing this amazing challenge where he's encouraging millionaires to freeze their salaries and live off their current assets instead of paying themselves for a year, and the money will go to create new jobs and-" And realizing Oliver probably doesn't care one bit about Ray's goals to boost the economy or raise the minimum wage, she ends with, "It just happened."

"Right." Oliver smiles at her gently, the same one he uses when he looks at baby Sara, his eyes filled with emotion even as his lips struggle to remain curved in the mask of a smile. "I just want you to be happy, Felicity."

She nods in thanks, and before she can say anything else, she pushes the foundry door open and leaves, stepping into the sunlight once again.

the end ~