Spin the Bottle: Intro

A/N: Yes, this idea is completely ridiculous, but isn't that was fanfiction is for? To do things that would never happen in canon? My birthday is coming up, so this is really a birthday present for me. I'll reiterate what I said in the summary: this is not supposed to be romantic and there are no pairings.

Rated T for drinking and very subtle adult themes.

Enjoy!

"All right, the birthday girl has something to say," JJ said, clapping her hands together. "Attention, please!"

"People!" Morgan bellowed, and the talk died away. "Empress Penelope has a new command."

"It's not a command," Garcia protested, as she hurried to the front of the room. "I just have an idea for a game to play." A smile let her lips as she revealed a bottle of vodka she'd been holding behind her back.

"Ooh, shots?" Rossi asked.

"Yes! But after we play the game."

"What game?" Reid asked, finally sounding interested.

"Spin the Bottle!" Garcia announced triumphantly.

"Before you protest," JJ hurried to say, "Kissing doesn't always have a sexual connotation, and we don't mean it to here. This is just a family activity." She held up her hands to forestall the groaning.

"No family I know pays spin the bottle," Rossi muttered in an aside to Hotch, who raised his hand.

"In an activity like this, the only connotation possible is sexual," he protested. "I know it's your birthday but don't be ridiculous."

"Whoa!" Morgan said. "What's ridiculous? It's a bonding experience. And as the good Doctor so often reminds us, kissing passes less germs than handshakes."

"That doesn't mean it doesn't pass any!" Reid said, frantically turning to Callahan, who stood beside him, undecided. She was watching Hotch, waiting for his decision.

Hotch checked his watch. "Fine."

"Good!" Garcia said. "Okay, here are the rules!"

She and JJ pushed them all into a circle and Garcia carefully placed the vodka bottle in the center.

"First, you get one spin. Who it lands on is final, no exceptions. Second, we'll just do one spin each. Third, after you kiss someone, you can have a vodka shot as your reward. Fourth, faces and hands are the only targets allowed." Garcia sat down, next to Reid. "Ooh, and fifth, the two partners stand up so there is not awkwardness, or less, at least. And the one who spins is the one to kiss, again, no exceptions. And sixth, each kiss must last three seconds. No air kisses from Paris here!" She paused. "Uh, who's next to me? Reid, you go first."