"Cecily?" My little brother calls my name. I ignore him for good reasons. "Are you ever going to talk to me?" Right now survey says no. " Well anyway, I would like to start my three part apology by first saying that I think you are a wonderful older sister, no just overall woman, or person I suppose if we are to avoid any gender discrimination…"

At last I finally crack and whirl around on my dumbass bumbling baby brother, "Liam, so help me God, if you do not shut the fuck up I will shove my boot so far up your ass you'll be choking on my shoelaces." I understand to the casual observer that my reaction may seem a bit harsh but it's not without its good reasons. One minute I am sitting in Gold's pawnshop waiting to pick up Liam, because the idiot failed his driving test, making plans to go shopping with Aunt Ruby for a homecoming dress, and then the next I am being sucked through a portal to the Enchanted Forest. A portal, I might add, that was created by the little brother who wanted to impress the Dark One's daughter, Rosie, with his magical capabilities. If he wasn't my own blood I would have beaten him to death with a stick the instant we landed. And it is not like that would have been hard to do with the abundance of sticks I am currently tripping over trying to find our way through this dense forest.

"Please, it's not like I meant for this to happen." He whines behind me. For being sixteen Liam can act like a real child sometimes.

" Yeah, I bet you thought waving a magic wand around would only bring sunshine and rainbows. It's not like our family motto is 'magic always comes with a price' or anything."

My brother cracks a smile at my rant. " I thought our family motto was 'I will always find you'." Instead of replying to him with some good old fashion Jones' wit, I just huff and make sure we are still traveling in the same direction and not circling around like morons. "Besides, this was bound to happen anyway. Falling through a portal to the Enchanted Forest is like a family tradition." Why was I not an only child? Oh yes, because our parents are disgustingly happy. "Hey." Liam grabs my shoulders and turns me around to face him. " I'm really sorry. Sometimes I don't think things through. And I know you think you have to figure this out because you're older and smarter, but if you let me help you we can get through this and go back home." I always feel like I have to protect him because he is my baby brother. When he was born I knew I would do anything to keep him safe. So when we fell through the portal, I felt like I had failed in doing my job. But right now, he is right. We'll work better if I'm not being a bitch to him because I'm angry at myself, and if we look out for each other.

"I guess the Jolly Roger crew is back in action then?" I say using the name we gave ourselves when we were little and pretending to be part of Dad's band of pirates.

"Hells yeah!" He exclaims and tries to fist bump with me. I just shake my head and carry on walking. "S'all cool." He says and fist bumps himself. Little idiot.

XXXXXXXX

Three hours later, with just a little bit of sunshine left, we finally make it to some port side town. My feet are killing me because when I woke up this morning and put on my stylish yet uncomfortable boots, I had not planned on spending my day trekking through a forest. Liam spots an inn so we make our way there, pocketing money from some unobservant natives on our way. Sometimes being the children of a pirate and a thief pays off. I can tell most people are staring at us based on our clothes and I know soon we will have to find something else to wear if we want to blend in more. But first all I want is some food and a plan on how to get back to a land that has The Simpsons.

"Hmm," Liam murmurs as we sit in the common area of the inn, after paying for a night, waiting to be served food. "I wonder what the drinking age limit is in the Enchanted Forest." He says with a small smile.

I kick him underneath the table. "Not while I'm here." That's all I need is a drunk brother stumbling about more than he already does.

"Ms. Buzzkillington." He sulks while we get our food. After eating Henry's food, if you can call it that, this meal is not the worst thing I have tasted but it sure is no five star quality. As I'm drinking down some water to get the taste of whatever meat I just ate out of my mouth, I start to choke as I notice the couple who walks through the door.

"Something go down the wrong pipe?" Liam asks. I just stare behind him at the man and woman who take a seat and make love eyes at each other. Liam turns around in his chair to look and gasps. "No fucking way."

"Liam, I don't think you just sent us to the Enchanted Forest. I think you shot us about three hundred years in the past." I say in astonishment as I look at a twenty something year old version of my Dad and a woman I have only seen in a picture once. Milah. Shit.

"Well that's my limit of crazy for today. I'm going to bed." He makes to stand up, but I lean over the table and grab him by the arm and yank him down. "What the hell woman?" He says rubbing his arm.

"You can't let them see you." Liam raises his eyebrow at me in a silent question. "You are a carbon copy of Dad only blond." I do not want to mess up the timeline in anyway. God, like being sent through a portal wasn't bad enough, now I have to worry about this. I need an Advil.

My brother just scoffs at me. "Come on. Nobody sees a person who looks kind of like them, because I do not look just like him, and thinks 'Oh that must be my son from the future'. And even if he did see me, or us, it's not like that will affect anything. When he meets us for the first time in the future we are just a tad bit smaller and like to soil ourselves." I suppose he has a point. If he saw us it's not like that would affect him meeting Mom or anyone else. It is just so weird to see my Dad a couple feet away from me and not be able to go to him with my problems. My mind is all messed up. Especially seeing him nuzzle the neck of someone who isn't Mom. Eww, their nuzzling. "Actually we could make this work for us." Liam gets a light in his eyes. I hate that light, it has gotten me into one too many stupid situations.

"Yeah, and how is that?" I ask warily.

"Well let's be honest, we have no idea what we are doing here. We don't know anything about this land except from the stories we have been told. I don't think that will be enough for us to get by here. But Dad over there, knows this land, and this time and is super resourceful. He could help us get back home."

I shake my head, already against this plan. "Liam, that is not our dad over there. That is a man who has never met us, owes us nothing, is a backstabbing pirate in love with another woman. He is a villain and he is not going to kiss our booboos and tuck us in at night." It hurts me to say anything bad about the father I adore, but it is true. I trust the man next to us about as far as I can throw him. I'm not about to put my brother's safety and my own in his hands.

"Do you have any better ideas on how we get out of this place?" He asks.

I rack my brain for a minute. "Mr. Gold?" It is more a question than a statement.

"Oh yeah, let's ask the man who is going crazy on power and the loss of his son for help. I'm sure he'll just love the children of the man who ran away with his wife. That idea gets three gold stars."

"Oh shut up." I throw back. I try really hard to think of any other way to get home without asking a certain pirate captain for help. As the minutes tick by and I am unable to come up with anything Liam smirks.

"That's it. We go with my idea." He says and gets up to go over to Dad, Killian, whatever.

"Wait!" I call, trying to get him to come back to the table. In his haste and happiness of coming up with a plan, he forgets that his plan is lacking a certain…plany element to it. I get up and follow him to make sure he doesn't screw up worse than he has.

"Hello Captain." I hear him say as I finally reach the table where Dad and Milah are sitting. This is the first time I get a good look at her, and although it is unfair to her, I hate her. I would hate seeing anyone with my Dad who is not Mom no matter what the time period. I try to look at her objectively, she is pretty and looking at my brother with a confused but kind smile, but I still see a woman who left her son and is too buddy buddy with my dad.

"Is there a reason you are interrupting my meal boy?" Dad says in a too sweet to be anything else but threatening voice. This stumps Liam who has never been talked to this way by our dad. I should have known he couldn't handle this. Milah nudges Dad's arm to cool him down and I decide to step in.

"We need your help." I say cutting straight to the chase. Jones' wit but a Charming's tact.

"And who are you fine lass?" He winks at me. I think I'm going to be sick all over the floor. Thankfully Liam recovers and steps in for me a little less pleasant than he was before.

"That's my sister, and like she said we need you to help us." My dad and Milah exchange a bored look and turn to us.

"No." He says, and goes back to eating his food.

"No? Just like that?" Liam says in surprise. I think that he thought his connection to Dad would be strong enough to travel worlds and time. That's hard to do when this man has never been a father.

"Just like that." Killian says.

"We aren't in the habit of helping oddly dressed children out of the goodness of our hearts." Milah finally says something and with attitude no less. That is the last straw. I am in a whole new crappy world, with a man who is but isn't my dad, and a woman who I just don't like. I am tired and want to go home and drink fucking hot chocolate with fucking cinnamon even though it is disgusting but everyone else in the family likes it and I just want to be close to them.

I take the plate of food they had been eating from and throw it across the room. Everyone looks at us. I'm nothing if not dramatic.

"Look." I say leaning over the table, not caring that I just pissed off two deadly pirates. I'm a damn princess pirate, and I'll do what I want. "You are not going to help us out of the goodness of your hearts. You are going to help us because I say so." Queen voice curtesy of one Regina Mills.

"Why would we do that?" Killian says in a threatening voice.

"Because if you don't we'll tell the Dark One where you and Milah are." I say just as threatening. Like father like daughter.

"How do you know my name?" Milah asks with suspicion. My brother snaps his fingers and holds the knife that our dad was reaching for under the table. Sometimes I forget the little man can wield magic.

He twirls it around in his fingers, a trick Dad taught him. "We know a lot of things and are capable of much." He says cryptically. He may be enjoying this whole threatening thing too much. He needs to stop spending so much time with Gold.

"Why would we care if you told the Dark One where we are?" Killian says clearly upset by the display of magic.

"You haven't heard? There is a new and improved Dark One these days. Goes by the name of Rumplestiltskin." I feel a sick sense of happiness when Milah's face blanches as I say this. "I'm sure he is just dying to know where his lovely wife is." Killian looks at Milah with a scared softness and that is the first time I see anything of my Dad in him. I now feel bad for threatening a person he cares about, even if I don't personally like her. Because hurting her hurts him, and I never want to hurt him. Even if he is an ass right now.

"Fine." He says defeated. "We'll help you two. What is it you exactly need from us?" At that Liam stops twirling the knife around and looks at me confused. Of course he forgot he didn't actually make a plan.

"Give us a second." I say as I grab Liam's arm and drag him a couple of feet away.

"I forgot to make a plan." He simply says.

"Yeah, you did. Now that we have them what do we need?" I say rubbing my eyes.

"Well, we can't use a magic bean. Those only travel through worlds not through time."

"Bloody fantastic."

He scratches behind his ear for a second thinking. "We need the wand I used to bring us here." He finally concludes.

"The wand that a crazy Dark One has right now?" This is just becoming too much. I should just stay here and invent electricity.

"Actually he doesn't have it in this time period. The black fairy does. Oh, and by the way, she is super evil."

I just nod my head and then tilt it up to the ceiling. Why god? "Yeah of course she is. Because if she was nice that would be just too easy. Can't have that. Well let's go find the bitch, steal the wand and go back home. Piece of cake." I march back over to where the pirates are having their own private conversation with Liam behind me.

"So do you know anything about a black fairy?" I ask.

"Black as in dark fairy, not skin color." Liam adds. "Not that we don't want a black fairy, because we're not racist or anything, it's just…" They are looking at him like he has two heads and I am giving him my best shut the Hell up look. "And I'm being quiet." He looks at the ground.

"We don't know where she is but we've heard of her." Milah says, still looking at my brother in concern.

"We know someone who might know where she is." Past Dad puts in. he is looking rather disgruntled. Welcome to my life.

"Great!" I clap my hands together in fake enthusiasm, thinking of the bed I paid for that now awaits me. "We'll pick this up in the morning. And if you try to run, just know that magic man over here can track you down and find you using this." I say as I point to the knife Liam still has. A tracking spell requires an object from that person, I may not practice my true love magic like Liam but I do know that bit. "Nighty night."

"Wait." Killian says before we leave. "What are our blackmailer's names?" He sneers.

Liam and I look at each other. "Liam, and Cecily Hook." I reply as I exit the scene.

Thank you for trying out my new story. I hope you like it so far. Enjoy the new Once episode tonight!