This doesn't happen in real life. John Watson insists it as he curses and rolls the top of his pajama bottoms. He reaches up and pulls his hair so it drifts over one shoulder, getting ready to go downstairs to face his flat mate and all of the mockery at this mishap.

When he descends the stairs, Sherlock spares a glance to the stairway and huffs. "You must be one of John's – the door is over there, don't let it hit you on the arse on the way out."

"Excuse me? Is that really what you say to them?" John asks as he walks closer, trying to get Sherlock to understand.

Sherlock shrugs. "It's really a matter of principle. They are annoying and – wait, John?"

"Yeah, um…what the fuck happened last night?" John asks as he gestures to his very female form. "Is it those new friends you made?" Sherlock sighs as he stands, walking around his friend and investigates. John finds himself muttering under his breath. "You are never this obvious when I'm in my male form."

Sherlock steps back, staring at John with a shocked expression. "Excuse me?"

"I mean…when you check me out, never quite this obvious. Wait, I meant when you-"

Sherlock grins, putting a finger to John's lips. "I'll endeavor to be more 'obvious' then."

"That's not what I meant – can you call, uh, Molly or something. Clothes, I will need clothes," John mutters, waving his hands in front of Sherlock's face.

"Yeah, yes, of course," Sherlock says, walking away hurriedly to call in Molly.

Not twenty minutes later are Molly and Lestrade at their door, eager to see if this was a practical joke. Molly grins when she sees John. "You make a very pretty woman, I'm surprised. The structure was reformed just right so that you fit the female form, and it works on you." Before John can say a word, Molly grabs her hand and drags her upstairs. "Come on, we've work to do."

Molly finds John an outfit that is rather flattering, all the way down to red pants that she seemed to have picked up for him at the store. "I know you have regular ones this color, lucky ones. I figured something familiar would help."

"Thanks," John mutters as she runs a brush through her hair, admiring the female body a bit in the mirror while he does. "Sherlock's been extra attentive, should I be…worried?"

"He likes you in both forms, if it was a concern it would have been a concern a long time ago," Molly mumbles as she fastens the jeans together and adjusts the top so it sits over the breasts just right. "I probably shouldn't have said that, huh?"

"Maybe not," John says running his hands over his female body, smoothing down his clothes. "I might have to have a talk with Sherlock."

"Just a talk then," Molly says with a wide grin as she walks him back downstairs.

"Oi! Shut it," John says as they come back to the living room, and John does not miss that Sherlock's eyes do not leave him for a moment. "I never actually thought I'd have to say this to you, but my eyes Sherlock – up here!"

Sherlock snaps out of what seems like a trance and looks John in the eyes. "What, sorry?"

Lestrade and Molly laugh at them. "Well, that's our cue to leave. Thank you for letting us be witness to this event so we know you are not full of shite when the story is told again later," Lestrade says as he ushers Molly out the door with them.

"Sherlock, what is with you? You weren't this bad when Irene stood in front of you naked," John says as she stands in front of Sherlock's chair.

"That was Irene…it wasn't," Sherlock reaches his hands forward then hesitates. "May I?"

John takes a hitched breath. "Depends on what you are asking for." It occurs to John within seconds that Sherlock hasn't the slightest clue what he's asking for. She takes a step forward and nods. "Go ahead."

Sherlock stands and reaches his hands forward, running them slowly down over John's entire body. John trembles under the touch and knows she's a goner. "The female form is more obvious, that's why it caught my attention quicker. It is not that I did not notice before there was a magnetic energy attached to you, it's that…it was too hard to ignore this time," Sherlock says in a soft tone of voice as he runs his hands back up again. "Boundaries, tell them now."

"None," John is surprised to hear even as the word leaves her lips.

Sherlock's eyes turn darker. "Tempting," Sherlock mutters as he runs his hand down the front of her torso, down the center until his fingers are running right over the front of her jeans. Sherlock's eyes flicker up again for approval and John just nods. Sherlock runs his fingers in between her legs over her jeans and watches as John's legs start to turn to jelly just at the insinuation.

Sherlock puts his other hand around John's back and helps him over to his own room, shutting the door behind them and laying John on the bed. "Excuse my forwardness, really you must."

"You've been waiting long enough, I get it," John says with a small grin.

Sherlock nods as he hovers over John, unbuckling her jeans and yanking them down her legs and away, just admiring for a moment. "The red pants, such a detail for you."

"Do you like them?" John asks as he spreads his legs just a bit wider for Sherlock.

Sherlock nods cautiously, sliding his fingers down John's torso once more until they reach between her legs again and rub over her entrance through the red pants. "Already so eager," Sherlock murmurs in wonder as he continues to rub around the area, pressing and spreading the wetness around. "May I kiss you?"

John's eyes flicker down to Sherlock's and just nods. Sherlock reaches up and smashes his lips to John's, for some reason no longer feeling so delicate about the occasion. It feels too good, the sensation of Sherlock rubbing harder against her clit and the battle of tongues that Sherlock is assuredly winning.

John reaches forward and pushes away Sherlock's pajama bottoms in one swift run, glad and concerned all at once that there were no pants underneath. He reaches forward and runs his hand up and down the shaft of Sherlock's member before gripping onto it and tugging like he would his own. Sherlock responds by digging his fingers underneath John's pants and rubbing his fingers over her entrance directly, making John cry out into Sherlock's lips.

John reaches his hands around Sherlock's arse and pulls away from the kiss long enough to mutter "move your hand" to Sherlock. The detective obeys hesitantly before John pushes Sherlock's arse forward to rub Sherlock's cock over his entrance and something further in the detective snaps. He rubs his penis over top of those red pants, between her lower lips, making sounds that don't sound as much human as animalistic as he leaves bite-marks around John's neck and shoulders. Sherlock rips away the red pants, and rubs the head of his cock over John's entrance, moving his hands up to remove John's shirt and bra in one shift pull up, and as Sherlock was already shirtless it leaves them completely nude to one another. Sherlock reaches his head down and licks and nips at one nipple before moving to the other side, making John buck against him and impale herself on Sherlock's member.

Sherlock cries out and buries his face in John's shoulder. "Oh fuck, John, please don't say I have to pull back away."

John is quite lost for words. This is new experience for him as well. "You better fucking not," John mutters before thinking about it much, and starts begging him to move. Sherlock obliges, thrusting in slow languid movements at first before fucking into her better, faster, harder.

Neither of them last as long as they would like to, and when it's done it is over, them lying beside one another on the bed panting. "That felt…"

"So good," John finishes Sherlock's sentence and sits back up beside him, finger-combing her hair out of her face. "We've got to do that again."

"A few minutes, if you would," Sherlock whispers breathlessly as he smiles up at John.

"Too tired for me to kiss you?" John asks as he reaches down to kiss his Sherlock.

Sherlock grins tiredly. "The way you might want to, perhaps. But please do anyways."

"Never stop kissing you?" John asks with a small grin.

"Never," Sherlock begs softly before John's lips descend onto his again.