His whole life Ja'far just felt like he was in some kind of daze. Like everything around him was some kind of dream. A nasty dream filled with darkness. All the colors that should be bleed right out of their shape. Everything was so flat and grey. It matched who he was though and when he looked at his reflection he was reminded that this was his life. His tear stained freckled cheeks were just a part of who he was.

It always felt like something was missing from his life. As though something had taken his colors from him and he was just had to find it. How was he supposed to find something that he didn't even know existed? He was a prisoner in his life.

"Ja'far."

Oh god not him, not again.

"Ja'far."

The sound of that voice made Ja'far shake slightly. Sure he hadn't actually done anything wrong, but he didn't answer immediately after he was called. The only way he wouldn't get in trouble was if he was with that magi. That dirty brat ran off the moment Ja'far came near him. Ja'far didn't know why that man hated him so much. It's not like Ja'far cared all that much. The man was annoying and just caused everyone pain anyway.

"Ja'far!" The third harsh yell came making Ja'far flinch. He could almost feel the slap in the man's voice. Okay so maybe it was better he came out of hiding before he was called a fourth time. He didn't want to know what the man was going to put him through as it was. With a soft sigh he came out from the room he'd been taking refuge in.

"Yes lord Kouen," Ja'far said softly bowing to the man. He just hoped he wouldn't get smacked. He didn't like the stinging feeling on his skin. It burned and sometimes Ja'far swore his face bruised from it. Not that he would actually know if it did, he hated looking at his reflection. He swallowed looking up at the man. He looked mad, but Ja'far didn't like the way he was looking at him.

"I apologize for not coming the moment you called," He looked away feeling like he was going to start shaking. It was bad when Kouen would hit him, it was worse when he didn't know what was going to happen.

Ja'far almost yelped when Kouen grabbed his arm pulling him close. He kept his face down and to the left. There was no way he was going to look at the man. Ja'far wouldn't do anything in this man's presence unless he demanded it. He was too afraid to. Kouen wasn't as bad as some of the people Ja'far has met, but he was up there on the list. He didn't seem to show any remorse for treating him like a rag doll instead of a person.

"Look at me."

Ja'far almost didn't look up. He didn't want to see that damn face and those harsh eyes. He felt like he was being smothered under his gaze. Like he couldn't breathe no matter how much he clawed for air. Before he could even think to turn his face Kouen Grabbed his jaw roughly. Then came the lips crashing down on his in almost a bruising manner. Ja'far closed his eye trying to think of anything, but the taste of this man's mouth.

It made Ja'far want to spit. He tasted fucking terrible. He couldn't even place the taste. He didn't know anything that tasted as bad as this. Ja'far took a deep breath when the man pulled away from him. Kouen tightened his grip on Ja'far's arm pulling him down the hall. Ja'far closed his eyes as he was pulled around. Sure it made him feel dizzy, but it helped him take his mind off of things for just a minute.

He was so sick of this and if he had to hide his face into a pillow sobbing quietly he was going to slit this man's throat. Ja'far grit his teeth as he was shoved into the princes room. He kept his back to Kouen. The man wouldn't demand that he turn to look at him. Kouen didn't care much for that kind of intimacy. What he did demand though caused him to shake slightly.

"Strip."

His eye twitched. He was not some kind of toy for Kouen's amusement, but that's what he used him for half of the time. Maybe that was Ja'far's fault for not being the little obedient bitch that he was used to. Ja'far was sure that he just like having power over him. Over anyone who defied him really. Ja'far held his eyebrows together slowly pulling his clothing away from his body. It would have been nice to just keep his clothes on. He knew better than to fight against Kouen though. The man wasn't gentle when he was in a good mood. He'd rip his clothes off if Ja'far didn't take them off himself.

He hadn't gotten half way through undressing himself when Kouen grabbed him and threw him down onto the bed. He propped himself up on his arms feeling his robes pool around him. Ja'far watched Kouen pull his own clothing off. Ja'far tried not to roll his eyes as he flopped down on the bed. The man always looked so confident in himself during these situations. Ja'far jumped when he felt those hands on his legs. There was so much hatred that bubbled up in his chest feeling those hands touch him. His legs were so sensitive and no matter how much he hated this man touching him, it felt so nice.

His hands always started off so soft and gentle. Ja'far didn't know why the man even teased him with those soft hands. Because it never lasted. Ja'far was going to be covered in purple marks by the end of the night. Ja'far tried to close his legs when Kouen's hands traveled up them. He didn't want to spread his legs open for Kouen like some kind of harlot, but it didn't stop the man from pulling his legs apart.

A small whimper left his lips as Kouen let hot open mouthed kisses on his inner thigh. He wanted to pull away from him and felt like writhing under his touch. His face was already growing hot and an arousal was pooling in his belly. It was frustrating and embarrassing. A surprised cry left Ja'far's lips when Kouen bit into his sensitive flesh. He tried jerking his leg away and that caused Kouen to dig his fingers into his leg. Great. More bruises to the collection.

"Stop making that face," Kouen growled. Ja'far tried to relax his face. He wasn't sure how successful he was about it, but he did try. He didn't even know what face he had been making before.

"Sorry," he muttered throwing an arm over his face. If Kouen couldn't see him, he couldn't complain. Those hands continued to travel up his legs pulling the rest of his clothes off. Ja'far hated how exposed he felt like this. He didn't like this man looking at his pale, freckled, and scared body, because he knew he wasn't appreciate. He didn't think anyone would appreciate a body like this, but Kouen didn't. Ja'far knew he didn't and why would he, Ja'far wasn't anything, or anyone important to him. He was just something Kouen used to get his frustrations out on.

Ja'far bit down on his lips feeling Kouen press his hands to his stomach. He always hated how Kouen pushed down on his stomach and chest when he did this and it made him cry out when he pinched his nipple between his fingernails. His chest rose off the bed not sure if he was enjoying the feeling or not. Ja'far was ready to yell at the man. It was on the tip of his tongue, but he knew better than to express his displeasure.

Those lips were back on his again and he felt the others skin pressing against his own. Ja'far's arousal was pressed against Kouen's stomach and he liked it, which bothered him the most out of everything. Kouen's hands were moving along his body and his touch was so light. It was sending shivers down his spine.

"Stop teasing me," Ja'far growled.

Fuck.

He was afraid to look at Kouen. Why did he have to open his mouth? Kouen grabbed Ja'far's hips flipping him onto his hands and knees. Ja'far pressed his face down into the bed. At least he didn't have to worry about Kouen looking at him anymore. He could feel Kouen's hand travel up the inside of his leg caressing the curve of his ass, before landing a hard smack on it. Ja'far closed his eye waiting for the sting to go away. He didn't have time to adjust to it before there was another hard smack on his ass.

This was so humiliating.

What's worse was that he liked the feeling of it. He wanted more, but at the same time he wanted to ring that man's neck. And it was his own fault for being so impatient. Kouen was being gentle with him. He should have left it at that. Ja'far let out a low hiss at the next smack the man delivered. He bit down on his lip pressing his face further into the bed. Kouen reached down grabbing a fist-full of Ja'far's hair yanking his head back. Ja'far let out something of a growl when he did. He was so sick of his man. There was another smack delivered before the man spoke lowly in his ear.

"Do you just like being punished?"

Ja'far grimaced at the next smack he got. It was just starting to hurt and the man wasn't stopping. Ja'far couldn't hide his face and he did not want to know how red his ass was. When the smacks finally stopped Ja'far was almost grateful. He was panting and he could feel the sting in his skin. He didn't have to touch it to know it was hot. It was burning.

If Ja'far had it this way he would strangle this man, not enough to kill him, just enough to make him suffer. He would do it every day until he got bored. He didn't have it his way though and it was starting to piss him off. A low hiss escaped Ja'far's lips as Kouen pressed his fingers inside of him. He hated when Kouen would do that.

"That fucking hurt," Ja'far growled lowly. He was shocked when Kouen had the decency to pull his fingers out. That was a change of pace, but it didn't make anything better. Ja'far pressed his hips backwards when Kouen's hand slid between his legs. It shouldn't have felt as good as it did. He wanted to rut into that hand, but he didn't want to seem desperate. Didn't want to show the man that he was enjoying himself.

Ja'far held his breath when the tip of Kouen's cock pressed against his entrance. He bit down on his lip as he slowly pressed inside him. It was somewhere between painful and pleasurable. He wanted to feel the man press deep inside him, but he couldn't stand the thought of the man inside him. He held so much anger for this man, but it was so hard to feel angry when Kouen grabbed his hip with one hand giving a hard quick thrust.

He let out a loud cry trying to press his face into the bed again. It made Kouen's hand tighten in his hair. He felt like crying the harder and faster Kouen pressed into his body. His breathing came out shallow and fast and he hated his sensitive body so much. He could feel his muscles tense and he didn't like the moans that were leaving his lips. Ja'far didn't want to like the way Kouen touched him. Every part of him was telling him it was wrong, but it felt so very good.

When Kouen reached around to take hold of Ja'far's arousal it was the last of his willpower. He came into the man's hand arching his back as he did so. Kouen finally let go of Ja'far's hair letting him drop into the bed while the other continued to thrust into him. It was uncomfortable and he was too sensitive. He hated the feeling of Kouen coming inside him. Not to mention the man couldn't just leave it at that. He had to pull out and cover his ass and back.

Ja'far just sat there for a moment his ass in the air and face pressed into the bed. He didn't know where Kouen had gone. Didn't know if he was in the same room or not. Ja'far didn't care. He eventually collapsed onto his side his knees cramping when he tried to unfold them. He groaned pulling himself into a ball.

His ass hurt.

His head hurt.

How he wished he could kill that man.