Once Again
This story is rated M for references to drug abuse, cutting, and other forms of self-harm
Percy
Percy sat in the corner of his bedroom, once again wondering why his life was as fucked as it was, and, of course, why it had to be him.
He looked down at the bottle in his hand and took another sip from it; his mother would be disappointed once he saw what he was doing again, but it was something he couldn't really help.
He looked at the clock on his nightstand and saw it was 3:44pm. 5pm sharp was when support group was supposed to start. Support group was supposed to help him get over the addictions he had, to try to bring him back into civilization. But who was he kidding? He would never be normal. That was something that he had accepted a long time ago.
He heard the front door open to what was,to be blunt, an excuse for an apartment. He heard his mother's and step-father's voices.
His Mum opened hisbedroom door.
"Percy, we're home. We brought you so—" His Mum cut off whatever she was about to say when she saw the bottle in his hand. "Oh, hunny, where'd you get this?"
"A place."
"You know you're not supposed to be drinking."
"Well, would you rather I self-harm instead? So the whole world can seehow much of a freak I am?"
His Mum bent down as far as she could at seven months pregnant. "Hunny, you know what I mean. You need to stop this. I'm worried about you. You're my baby boy, and I hate watching you throw your life away."
"Yeah, well, I'm not going to be your baby boy once that thing is here."
"Percy, we've talked about this. Anyway, the baby could be a girl, and then there would be no reason for you to be jealous."
"I'm not jealous, I'm just stating a fact. I'm the bastard, the mistake. The kid that you had when you were fifteen. The kid that caused you to drop everything you had worked towards so I could have a decent life.
"And now you have this new kid on the way, one you did plan, witha husband who won't abandon you,"
Sally shook her head.
"Come on, hunny, come eat some food. Then you're going to go have a shower. Then I'll drive you over to support group, and you'll see your friends," Sally told him wearily.
"Friend, you mean friend. The only decent person in that place is Thalia."
"Okay, whatever you say. Now, quickly, before the food gets cold."
The food was just Chinese take-out from a quick restaurant down the street. It was basically what they could afford. After all, a teacher's pay is crap, and don't even get him started on the wages his Mum receives from working at the little candy shop.
After Percy took his shower, he met his Mum at the car, and she drove him to the weekly support group.
"Have fun, and tell me if anything exciting happens today," Sally said.
"Sure will, but I doubt that anything exciting is going to happen. 'Cause it never does."
She smiled. "Well, you never know."
Percy rolled his eyes and got out of the car and walked into the building.
o.O.o.O.o
When Percy got to the group he saw Thalia sitting down with a spare seat next to her.
"Hey, douche, can I just say I can smell the reek of alcohol on your breath from here?" Thalia said as he sat down.
"Well, it looks to me that like you have some pretty fresh scars on your wrists. If I didn't know any better, I'd say they came about today."
"Oh, shut up, at least I have friends outside of this place."
"I'm sorry, Thalia, but I'm pretty sure that's total bullshit. No one here has friends outside of this place. We're considered freaks, if you didn't notice already."
"I did notice, and anyway, this friend might be coming to the group next week," Thalia said.
"Aha, see, if she is coming to this place, she is obviously a freak like us." Percy smirked, thinking he had won the argument.
"Oh no, she is no freak. She is a straight A student who focuses on her studies and hopes to be accepted into the NYU. She's only coming here because she's worried I might get ideas on other ways to self-harm by listening to everyone else."
Percy didn't believe her one bit, but he kept his mouth closed. Joel had just come in.
Joel believed anyone could get over inner demons without resorting to self-harm, so he was the leader of the support group
"Welcome, everybody, to another week of support group. Today, as everyone can see, Michaela won't be joining us. Itis for a sad reason. She couldn't put up the fight with her inner demons anymore. May her poor blessed soul rest in peace."
Percy looked around and saw the sad looks amongst the group. But they didn't pity her, they envied her. She at least got to escape the world. He's heard it before from them, last time someone committed suicide. "Now, does anyone have anything they want to bring up?" Joel asked. But Percy just zoned out for the rest of the time.
o.O.o.O.o
"Hey, support group'sover." Thalia nudged him.
"Oh,all right,thanks."
"Whatever," she muttered. "See you next week."
"Yeah, see ya."
Percy pretty much ran for his Mum's car, eager to get out of the dreadful place.
When he got into the car he saw that Sally had an excited look on her face.
"So, Percy, anything exciting happen at support group today?" she asked him.
"No, not really. Theonly thing that was different was at the start when Joel mentioned Michaela's suicide."
"Oh, the poor thing. I just hope, Percy, that you will never reach the point where you think your life isn't worth living, because there is always a reason. Remember that." She took a deep breathe "Speaking of which, I was putting some laundry away when I found your stash of weed."
Percy inhaled quickly at that. He'd admit he didn't put it in the best hiding spot, but she sounded disappointed, and while it didn't seem like he cared what his parents thought, hedid. His Mum meant the world to him.
"Anyway, you need to stop this. Who knows how this thing you're doing to your body is going to affect you in the future?"
"Mum, you know how hard it is to stop these addictions. I can't—youdon't understand." She gave him sad look and started to drive back home.
o.O.o.O.o
When they got back to the apartment, Percy raced upstairs into the bedroom and locked the door.
He checked where he hid the stash of weed that his Mum must have been talking about. He saw that it was gone, as he had expected.
But he knew to always keep a secret stash in a loose floorboard under the desk he had never used.
He crawled under his desk and took away the loose floorboard. He had a range of things under there, but this timehe onlyneeded alcohol. That was one of the main addictions.
He quickly popped open the cap and drank some. He sighed in relief. Even though it had only been a few hours, he needed it.
He kept drinking after that bottle; he lost count after bottle number four. He didn't usually drink this much, but what Thalia had said earlier had gotten to him. He didn't have any friends outside of support group. He was the social outcast at school; no one would dare to talk to Percy Jackson, the kid that was either drunk or high, and if he wasn't either, he was dead.
He fell into a deep slumber once he finished the last bottle.
o.O.o.O.o
The headache was killing him.
Percy normally didn't regret drinking; it helped the numbness he felt inside, buthe'd admit, he might have had one too many bottles the previous night.
When he entered his Basic Science class, his teacher decided to have a go at him. "Jackson! Why are you twentyminutes late for class?"
"Well, you see, Mr. McCatch, I didn't really want to show up to this class. Also I have a massive headache at this current moment, so that doesn't exactly help my motivation either."
Percy heard some snickers amongst the class, but it wasn't because of the way he talked to his teacher.
"Oi, sir! You should give the guy a break, I mean, he's probably high or something," he heard one of the jocks say. Nearly everybody laughed at the comment.
Percy was really sick of this school; it was because of these people here that students killed themselves. With their constant snarky comments, beating up kids that didn't deserve it, shit like that.
He walked out and just ran to wherever he could.
He needed to get those thoughts out of his mind. Suicide was such a terrible thing to commit, but it seemed nowadays, it seemed likeone of the best options that he had.
Most people looked down on suicide, saying that people who committed it were selfish and didn't care about others, but in reality, they believe that no one in the world cares for them anymore. That they are no longer needed. And so they sacrifice themselves, oblivious to the world.
o.O.o.O.o
The next time Percy arrived atthe support group there was a new girl, a blonde. She was sitting next to Thalia, which was his normal seat.
Percy realized that this must be the so-called 'friend' that Thalia was talking about.
Once Joel came in and started rambling on about the usual stuff, Percy noticed Blondie looking at him. She quickly looked away.
"So, Thalia, I'm looking at your wrists, and the scars don't look that fresh. Do you want to share what's been happening since we all last saw each other?" Joel asked Thalia.
"Oh, they don't look fresh 'cause I haven't cut in two days, and really, you think I cut every day? 'Cause you know, that's actually pretty fucking rude," Thalia spat, looking quite offended.
"No, Thalia, I don't think that; it'sjust that you usually come in with fresh scars. But this is great. Let your anger out; let the inner demons out."
Percy saw Thalia roll her eyes.
"Well, I don't actually like ninety-five percent of the people here, so no, I won't fucking let my anger out. If I don't like them, I definitely don't trust them."
"Okay, Thalia, everyone is entitled to his or her own opinion. Would anyone else like to speak about their inner demons instead?" Joel asked. Noone answered.
"I don't want to put the pressure onto anyone else," Joel looked at his watch, "and would you look at that, it's 6:31; we've gone a minute longer than we should have. Goodbye,everyone. I hope to see you all next week."
Percy got out of the place and ran out to his Mum's car, but not before he noticed that Blondie had been looking at him again.
"So anything exciting happen, anything new?" Sally asked.
"Once again, no. Oh, wait, there was a new girl there. One of Thalia's friends. I don't even know why she was there. I mean, there's nothing fucking wrong with her."
"Oh, a girl, you say?" Sally asked with an amused look.
"No, nothing like that. And quite frankly, I'm not interested in dating anytime soon."
Sally turned her head to him with a sad look in her eyes.
"Hunny, I know it's hard, but it's been seven months. I think it's time to move on. Maybegoing on a date or two would help you," Sally said.
Percy rolled his eyes. "No, Mum, it wouldn't. Can you just trust me on that, please? I can make my own decisions. Anyway,why would she, a normal person with a normal life, want to date someone like me? A guy that's addicted to pretty much any substance you could get addicted to?"
"Well, I thought you said she was friends with Thalia? So obviously she is used to, as you say, 'not-normal people'."
"Ha-ha. Very funny, Mum. Anyway, I'm just not interested okay?"
Sally smiled, and patted her bloated stomach.
"Come on. Let'sgo home."
o.O.o.O.o
Percy was starting to become really curious about Blondie. In each session, he always caught her staring at him. He wasn't exactly sure why either.
But he refused to ask. He would somehow let it slip to his Mum that he had been talking to her, and he just didn't want her to get her hopesup, especially not in her condition.
The pregnancy had surprised him, and yet it hadn't. HisMum was only 32, and his stepfather Paul was 33. It was normal now for people to have kids in their thirties.
He didtake his time to look at Blondie. She was decent looking, but it didn't look like she really tried either. After all, the only clothes he had ever seen her in were T-shirts and shorts.
Blondie mostly kept to herself during the sessions. Well, she would talk to Thalia. Percy couldn't blame her at the support group was unstable in some way. Some people here Percy swore were insane; they were just yet to be told by the professionals.
"Hey, Thalia, who's your blonde friend? Sorry, could you please introduce yourself and say why you're here? Remember thatno one here is judged by what our inner demons cause us to do," Joel said.
"My name is Annabeth, just Annabeth, nothing else. I don't really have any problems. I'm just here to support Thalia," Blondie said.
"Ah, okay, that's great that Thalia has a friend like you," Joel said. "That way, she has someone to help her with her inner demons apart from support group."
"Yeah, okay," she muttered.
Joel continued to ask questions. The good thing about Joel was that he knew how many times in a row he could ask a person. He learnt as soon as Percy started attending that he should ask him how he was doing once a month; Percy would get pissed when he asked how he was coping too many times in a row.
Once it was all over, Percy didn't run to the car like he normally would; he just speed walked.
When he got tothe car, his Mum was smirking.
"How come you're not running out of there like you normally do?" she asked.
"I don't know. I'm tired. Can we just go home, please?"
"So it has nothing to do with the new girl who joined a few weeks ago?"
Percy groaned and looked over to see his Mum smirking.
"No, it's nothing like that. Now can we please go home?"
"Uh-huh, okay, whatever you say."
Percy shook his head.
AN: And here as promised my new story, I'm very excited about this. And something I forgot to mention when I finished my last story was a huge thank you to my beta reader - Bushwah, who puts up with my very bad grammar.
I'm not sure what is going to happening with my updating schedule.
Until next time
ConverseaAthena