The Biggest Toad in the Puddle

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Prologue
落雷
Rakurai

Jiraiya, The Great Toad Sage, one of the three Sannin, home-town legend and self-proclaimed super-pervert, was at a loss.

This didn't happen often.

As a master spy, a Fūinjutsu expert and better than Jonin but not quite Hokage material ninja, it was rare that he came across such a mental road-block. Normally his mind was a fighting fit machine that worked in perfect harmony with his equally fit body -are you listening ladies?- so that he didn't suffer from hiccups like this. Problems like this were not suppose to come about in his life. He was one of the strongest ninja around, even a Kage thought twice about tangling with him. Bandits on the road, forget about them. Best-selling author, yeah, he most certainly was. And rather easy on the eyes if he must say so himself.

So it was understandable that he was confused over the fact that he was confused. But when facing a dilemma such as this, perhaps he was allowed to act a little like a drunk-yard right now, stood gaping at what he saw before him.

In fact, that would be much better, if this was all a drink induce hallucination, that what he was seeing before his eyes more incorrect, that he was actually out cold somewhere, nuzzled between the valley of a well-endowed lady's chest, snoring away and that this was all a dream.

Oh, he was a ladies man, his proudest title, if he did say so himself. After super-pervert of course.

But he was always, always careful.

He was a ninja, he was a vicious killing machine that was ruthless and merciless and spectacular in every way possible.

What he was not, was a father.

And still, the sight before his eyes proclaimed that statement to be a bold faced lie.

The kid, who couldn't be older than three, looked back up at him with huge green eyes, confusion warping his features. But even so Jiraiya could still pick them out. Cute button nose, thin lips and a soft jawline that looked nothing like his own face. The eyes were obviously not his. But the red lines that defined the lower lids were. The skin tone was. Hell, the furiously spiked bird's nest of white hair was without doubt his. The kid, had it not been for the eyes and the more delicate features, would have been a perfect mini Jiraiya.

Which was what had him so worried.

Behind the kid, with her arms folded across his chest, was who he assumed to be the mother. Same nose, same lips, same delicate jaw. But her eyes were a watered down honey. So where the kids emerald gaze was from, who knew. It's not like Jiraiya had known his parents' names, let alone what colour their eyes had been.

"Your kid, so he'll go with you." The woman, who's name he honestly couldn't remember -cut him a break, there were loads of them out there and he appreciated them all- sneered slightly, the kid tilting his head up to look at his mother, face expressionless. It was almost scary to see such a face on a child so young. Clearly there was no love lost here.

He couldn't leave the kid here.

Not only did his mother clearly not want him, but all it would take was a passing, non-leaf shinobi to see the resemblance and his life would be cut shockingly short in an instant. But he couldn't really travel with Jiraiya himself. Weren't kids suppose to need extortionate amounts of attention? Lots of time and care? That was the whole reason he'd left Naruto at the Leaf Village after all. He didn't have that kind of thing in him.

His thoughts must have shown on his face, because Honey Eyes threw her hands up in the air before pointing one finger at him, a vicious scowl on her face.

"He's already doing that ninja magic! We can't have that in the den."

Cringing at the mention of the woman's 'work-place', Jiraiya looked back down at the young kid.

"Can you show me?" He didn't know anything about kids, how much they knew or could understand of the outside world at what age. He knew there were prodigies, last time he'd been in Konoha the Uchiha were singing their latest genius heir praises, as if he were a god in human form. If they kid was preforming some kind of 'ninja magic' then maybe he'd be able to understand Jiraiya's request.

He squatted to the kids level as he held out his hand, watching the boy hesitate before offering his own hand in return. Jiraiya could already feel the chakra in the body dancing around, and not a moment later his little palm lit up with a coating of blue chakra. But that wasn't the only energy in this kid, there was something else there as well. Some kind of energy that wasn't quite nature chakra, but something close. A new bloodline?

Jiraiya looked back a the kid's face, noting a thin scar poking out from under one bang. Slowly, so as not to startle the boy -kids were always jumpy if you moved too quickly- Jiraiya brushed the hair back, inspecting the lightning bolt scar.

"How'd he get the scar?"

The woman huffed, folding her arms and looking away.

"Born with it." That was odd.

But if the brat could use chakra, maybe he wouldn't be so much of a handful, and someone would have to train his son after all. And as his -dear god, how had this happened?- father, the duty obviously had to fall to him.

"What's your name kid?"

"Rakurai." Lightning strike? Dear lord, had this woman no brain inside her head?

Looking at the boy, Rakurai, Jiraiya let out a low breath before slowly opening his arms for a hug.

Rakurai watched him hesitantly, but stepped forwards nevertheless.

"Wanna be a ninja kid?"

"Are you a ninja?" For a little tyke, he spoke surprisingly well.

Feeling somewhat uncomfortable, Jiraiya stood up, Rakurai propped up on his hip. He turned to the woman, ready to proclaim he'd take the kid with him, only to see that she was already walking away.

So instead, he forced himself to focus on the kid, his kid, and deciding what the hell to do with him.

"Yes I am."

"Why not." Came Rakurai lazy agreement, offered with a shrug of his shoulders, a small smile playing upon his lips as his green eyes lit up a bit. Well, at least the woman, who's name he still didn't know, hadn't snuffed out all his spirit.

"Come on then kid. We'll figure it out as we go."

And that about summed up the next nine years of Jiraiya's life.


Hahaha, so it begins.

Right, well Rakurai basically means Lightning strike or bolt of lightning or something like that. the Kanji are under the Prologue up at the top, for google it but I'm pretty sure I'm right.

So here we have a reborn Harry. I can't see Jiraiya taking to parenthood like a duck to water, I'm sure it'd be a rough and bumpy ride, but of course since Harry is reborn, he's pretty much self-sufficient right now. I'm fond of Jiraiya though, so it'll be fun writing his character.
Harry is three here, and the same age as Naruto and co. So, we're in for a time-skip next, but we may get flash-backs and stories of Harry's childhood as we go on. Which is sure to be interesting.

This is sure going to be good fun to write,

Tsume
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