Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto, it belongs to Masashi Kishimoto

Special thanks to my Beta Konomon.

A/N: There's a message at the end of the chapter. It's VERY IMPORTANT to please read it! Thank you!

Now on with the story!

Chapter 1: The Child, The Bastard and Mister know-it-all

He stood in front of him in all his ghostly glory, his gaze never leaving the human.

"Your task is to look after that child and don't even dare to mess it up!" He said in a ghastly voice.

"Ooh! So in other words I'll be a guardian angel!" Big goofy grin, that the man was adorning right now, was starting to irritate him.

"Call it whatever you please for all that I care! All I want, is your answer, not your opinion or messed up mortal views. Are you up for this task or not?"

The man in front of the Shinigami let out a silent breath. 'Were gods always this grumpy?' There was silence for a few moments between them. Hiding his eyes under the long bangs of black straight hair he remained quiet, pretending that he was thinking deeply. Finally, smiling like a Cheshire cat, he asked.

"So…When do I start?"

Contrary to popular belief the Shinigami wasn't a sadistic, divine being that liked seeing poor souls being either tortured or humiliated, nor did he enjoy doing it. Where mortals got that idea he didn't know. He didn't want to know how they came to believe that he personally came to reap their souls once their time was up, or that he ate their souls. He simply existed to supervise spirits, so they could leave their temporary home and pass on to the afterlife, their permanent home, while his sibling and counterpart - Life, looked after them, so they went to the living world for the new beginning, that was it.

Even if Death wasn't interested in the realm where the living resided, like his sister, he still kept his ear out for any interesting information that was worth his attention. Alas, exiting things rarely happened, but it was still better than spending his time playing card games with other gods, or being annoyed by the foul-mouthed Jashin accompanied by his endless cursing, masochism and sadism.

So when Life came to urge him to watch what mortals were up to, he wasn't expecting much, but still went along with her, just to escape from the strip poker that one of gods from some other world suggested. He played it once, it could be said that some deities aren't eye candies. Which was the reason why it left him scarred for the rest of his existence. How did humans came up with such terrifying games was a mystery to him.

"Next time I'll definitely send it to the other side…" When he saw a young boy with spiky dark hair, no older than twelve, playing stone skipping, who soon was joined by another brunette of the same age, he didn't know how to respond, he wasn't expecting much, but this was ridiculous.

He turned to Life and looked her in the eye as if asking for her reasons showing this to him. What she said next piqued his interest a little.

"Fate said that these two will be the ones to mold the future, for the better or worse. I think it said something about a child of prophecy too… Shame, I ran off from it, before it had a chance to finish what it was saying." Her impatience, when she was exited, was infamous among the gods. Even if she was like that all the time it didn't mean she didn't felt guilty for being impatient and running off from Fate, before it finished what it had to say. It didn't help the matter that Fate, actually rarely, bothered to talk at all.

"You should for once listen till the end, you know? When it bothers to say anything at all it's really important and shouldn't be ignored." When Life bowed her head down with her long, blond locks falling along, he knew that he hit a sensitive subject. Even though, he loved his younger sister dearly, it didn't mean he would be lenient with her. Right now he was a little disappointed with his sibling, also a bit angry. It was no longer a surprise to him, whenever she agreed to change herself, to stop and listen till the end what others had to say, that it would never last for long. Because she would always, in the end, return to her old habits. It was simply in her nature do to so, because Life, without her bursting energy and curiosity, wouldn't be herself.

"My apologies, brother, but you know pretty well how I am when I'm exited." Death didn't disagree, he simply nodded.

"But to be honest, right now I don't see anything special, so I guess we'll have to wait then." With that being said she turned, golden locks swaying around her, and vanished from Death God's sight.

The next time the Goddess of life dragged him out to the living world, he couldn't help, but be pleasantly surprised, just like his counterpart. Gone were those boys who played and spared near the river, now in their places stood two men, with such power, yet not seen in this world. Power that shook the world, one that said by mortals to be rivaled only by gods themselves. Same men whose clans fought each other for years and finally agreed to stop the bloodshed.

There, where the two boys from both enemy clans met as strangers, without knowing each other's identity, whose dreams were as big, if not bigger, than bijuus all put together. Now in that fateful meeting place, was a growing village hidden by leaves, built by said two ambitious boys, now men.

Despite himself, Shinigami smiled along with Life as they watched human children laughing, running and playing to their heart's content without a care in the world. Stand owners in the marketplace shouting prices and promoting their products, families dinning out, women searching for discounts for food and clothes, men looking and complimenting craftsmanship of tools and weapons.

"They really did change the future for the better. Just look at this place, brother! People can finally live without fear of war and losing their loved ones, moreover it's so lively here, everyone is happy!" Life couldn't be more happy, that was crystal clear. As she continued to babble on, Shinigami was nodding, barely even listening to her, lost in his own thoughts as he looked at the scene. Goddess noticed his behavior, but didn't comment on it, her elder sibling was restless as of late and she had a vague idea why.

Even if Death god's duty required that he must guide the souls to the afterlife to the dimension in between, it didn't mean that he wanted to. It's one of the reasons why he disliked wars. But the reason he was lost in thought, was because he couldn't get out of his mind what Fate told him not so long ago.

"Soon a chain of events will start, and it won't lead to anything good. We might need to interfere sooner or later…"

He stared at the fight that was ending in the valley, eyes void of any emotion. It will be soon recorded in history and will be known as Valley of The End. The rain was pouring heavily as heavens themselves were mourning over the end of one's life, friendship of both and another's lose of freedom.

He heard sobbing to his left, delicate palms and fingers, hiding his younger sister's tear stained face. To his right he heard Fate sigh, he looked it in the eyes, he could see sadness, exasperation, frustration and recognition in its gaze, as if it expected this outcome, but is not satisfied with it and hoped for another.

Life felt a hand with long nails on the top of her head, that belonged to her older sibling, gently stroking her hair, trying to comfort her.

Fate's eyes softened as its gaze fell on the girl. It didn't know how to comfort others when they were feeling down, but it would at least try, as humans said "it's the thought that counts".

"I might feel or know most things that will happen in the future, some things are meant to be, some are not, there are even rare cases, when rules of our creators are defied. But in this case I can't do anything about it. What happened here was meant to be."

As it said that both Life and Death could only nod.

Breath in, breath out… Breath in, breath out…

The war torn land, used like a canvas, painted in blood. The water of life flowing from wounds of the fallen painting the ground more and more in red. The lone figure of a man stood in the middle of what used to be a wasteland, now filled with corpses and unnaturally grown trees and their roots, some piercing through said corpses.

The man had long, black, straight hair, tan skin, wearing the remains of once red armor under which were a tattered black shirt and a pair of dark pants. All due to the unbelievable damage he sustained during the battle. He was known as Shodai Hokage and one of founders of Konohagakure, and as Shinobi no Kami, Hashirama Senju.

His breathing was ragged. It didn't take long for him to fall on the ground and continue to breath heavily. He knew it, the end was near. Even if he was recognized as the most powerful shinobi of his era, the one to defeat and kill the infamous Madara Uchiha, it didn't mean that he was unbeatable or for that matter - immortal.

He knew very well that he probably wouldn't walk out of this battle alive, when he signed up for this. Even if his wife and brother were protesting and demanding to take at least one of them with him, he wouldn't. He didn't want any of his precious people dying along with him. There were too many shinobi on the other side of the battlefield to count, even if they weren't as strong as him, he was only one man against countless enemies, and sooner or later they would tire him out.

Breath in, breath out…

He closed his eyes and relaxed as much as his body allowed. He could confidently say that he lived to the fullest, there was nothing to regret. He fulfilled his dreams, had a wonderful wife and kids, a caring younger brother. He saw his children grow up, even saw his little granddaughter grow a little as well, heck, he even taught her how to gamble! He laughed a little as the image of little Tsuna counting money better than any bankers of world's biggest banks popped in his mind after closing his eyes. It didn't hurt so much to laugh, his body was already numb. With last breath he let out, Shinobi no Kami was gone.

Fate prided itself as being very knowledgeable, composed and hardy, if ever fooled. So when worried Shinigami came to it, it knew that something was up. When upset Shinigami always bothered to visit, it practically screamed trouble or that you were doomed. Wanting to just get over with it, it started a conversation, for once.

"Something occurred." It was a statement rather than a question.

"Madara Uchiha's soul has yet to be seen in the reception dimension." To say that Karma was shocked to the core would an understatement.

While Fate searched for that accursed soul of Uchiha with Life sometimes accompanying it, when she had some free time to spare, it was getting more and more agitated. 'When a human dies in the living domain, its soul should immediately appear in the reception dimension, so why that mortal hasn't materialized there yet? Unless he still is breathing, because there's no way that his soul would be lost. If either angels or demons see that human left his body without finishing what it wanted to do, first thing they do is either inform the archangels or the higher rank demons that they will oversee those souls, and neither of them had reports about Madara Uchiha, moreover I saw with my own eyes that that brat 'died'. Trouble will befall all of us if we don't solve this mystery soon. I really wish that I would be wrong for once…'

So when Goddess of Life came running to Fate, crying and rambling something about a boy smashed by a huge rock, it didn't bother to listen, more focused on calming down the upset goddess. That was a futile attempt, since the girl started sobbing even more and babbling about Obito, Uchiha, smashed, saved, teammates.

That's when Death himself appeared next, walked up to his sister, put his hand on her head like he always did, when she was upset and turned to it. The look it got didn't please it at all, that same damn look it got all those years ago.

What Shinigami spoke next made Karma do something that neither he nor Life ever thought they would live to see: Fate, the most composed deity to ever exist, snapped. What they saw that day was most amazing, horrifying and traumatizing sight they had the honor to see for themselves.

"Obito Uchiha, whose body was broken by the falling boulder and should've died due the injuries he sustained, failed to arrive to the world in between heaven and hell, also known as the reception dimension."

Heavy, long silence had befallen all occupants in the space which was broken by the most murderous roar siblings ever heard.

"Those damned Uchihas!"

The sight that accompanied that inhuman howl wasn't pretty at all.

"I'm going to be a mother, ttebane!"

"I'm going to be a father!"

"Wah! They gonna have a baby! Did ya hear? A baby!" To say that Life was feeling ecstatic was to put it mildly. Both Shinigami and Karma's ears hurt and were feeling headache coming up also. Fate looked pleadingly at Death, practically begging him to stop the girl with impressive pair of lungs. He in return glared at it, after all it was its fault that they were right here. They would have been spared of this misery if Fate wouldn't have had one of its I'm smart, but I'm also sometimes stupid moments and summoned him and his hyperactive brat on sugar high of a sister here.

Fate apologetically bowed its head, and Death decided that he had enough, so he quickly put his hand on the babbling girls mouth to shut her up and opened a portal to one of the realms he liked to reside in in his free time. As he walked through the portal along with said girl, who still couldn't talk, he glanced over his shoulder to see it following him, still with its head down.

When they arrived he glared coldly at Karma, silently urging it to say what it wanted and just be gone, and while on its way take his sister with it. He just wanted to be done with this mess and get a break from both of them and relax, because he really needed to.

"So, so, why you wanted us there? Why, why? Hey, Karma!" As Life started to whine while clinging to it, it could very well feel Shinigami drilling a hole through his head just with his glare.

"Those two will become parents of a Child of the Prophecy." That finally shut her up and let it go. "That child is destined to change, not only the future, but the shinobi world itself, and I'm confident that for the better." At this Lifes eyes shined with excitement, Death also looked pleased.

"But there's also something that makes me uneasy." at this siblings' wings and horn for ears respectively twitched just like a dog's who was called by its owner.

"During the child's birth the masked man, claiming to be our beloved elder Uchiha, sets Kyuubi to destroy Konoha. I cannot see further, but I don't need my powers to know that this event will lead to something big, which will lead to something even bigger."

"Will it be a boy or a girl? Didn't you say that you cannot see pass the child's birth? How do you know that something will happen?" Life asked, her green eyes shining in the light of the space they were currently in. When a maniacal grin appeared on Fate's face, which Life swore was one of the most creepiest things she ever laid eyes on, it said,

"Gut feeling of course! Oh and it's a boy."

"It's a boy you said, it's a girl I say." Was the first thing that Life said after all three of them had witnessed the birth of the child, Kyuubi's extraction and now were watching as Kyuubi was destroying Konoha and killing more and more people with each second.

"Don't blame Fate for that, you know very well that it, as a genderless deity, confuses genders of humans, our fellow gods aren't of much help either as they have barely any visual resemblance of a human being…" Karma was already blushing from embarrassment, but after Death's comment it resembled a tomato more than ever.

"Talking from experience, brother?" When the god didn't answer she continued, "Is this the reason why you avoid playing card games?" Silence was the only answer she got. She burst out laughing and gasping for air. Now it was Death who was standing there red faced and embarrassed. Deciding to stand up for its friend who earlier stood up for it, Fate coughed into its fist successfully getting attention from both.

"Right now the strongest bijuu to exist is destroying the village and killing people left and right and all you can think about right now is strip poker?"

Life bowed her head ashamed of herself as Death let out sigh of relief. He looked at the mountain monument completely tuning out all the chaos around him and noticed the masked man confronting the current leader of the village.

"Let's go, it seems that Yondaime Hokage is taking the battle with Madara imposter elsewhere."

As they arrived at the clearing for the final clash of two men, they saw a man clad in black arrive also from the swirl.

"This is it, soon will come the moment. Don't talk, don't ask, just watch, both of you, what you'll see later tonight, after this, during and after the fight will shape the future." Fate ordered both its fellow deities.

"You're pretty talkative this past century and a half, you know that? If things weren't so serious I would have thought that you were ill!"

"Freya, beings of our kind don't get sick."

"I know that, brother!"

"Good, now be a good girl, be quiet and watch." With a pout, adorning her cherubic face, did as she was told.

"Are you Uchiha Madara? No…He's long dead…"

"Oh? I don't know about that…"

"On second thought, it doesn't matter who you are. Why you attacked the village?"

"Oh you know, it's fun, part of my plan to start a war to bring peace." The man now identified as 'Madara' said as it was a casual thing to say, while taking out chains and went for Minato.

Slamming Resengan in the back of his enemy The Yellow Flash proceeded to break contract between his opponent and the Demon Fox.

"A contract seal?! Are you trying to free Nine-Tails from my control?"

"No, I already did that!" As they both jumped away from each other, to put some distance, the injured man complimented Hokage's skills and left with a promise to return.

Hokage, once again, appeared in his village, deities tagging along with him, without his knowledge. Thinking fast and summoning Gamabunta the toad boss summon, asked him to hold the fox still till he gathered enough chakra to teleport himself and the fox that was preparing for another attack.

After a moment both the Fox and Yondaime were gone and not few seconds later a blast far away was seen. Seeing it, the former Hokage Hiruzen Sarutobi, went there with hope to help his successor.

In the clearing, where giant tailed beast was chained to the ground with the chakra chains of its previous host, the current leader of the village was making hand seals for the sealing jutsu. Dead Demon Seal. As he finished, Death, who was standing nearby with his companions suddenly vanished, surprising the other two, and appeared behind the young Hokage.

What surprised all three deities was that the Shinigami didn't look like he originally did. Now his appearance was a grotesque version of his original form. Long white shaggy hair that were holding his summoner's soul, two red horns on top, skin and bones of a body, greyish blue skin, loose white robes and a tanto in his mouth full of sharp teeth.

He was really displeased with this situation, but would bear with it. So he settled with watching the married couple talk, he wasn't in control of his body anyway. The husband explained to his spouse that after he'll finish the Dead Demon Seal she would be able to help their daughter when she will try to take control of Bijuu's power that will be sealed in her. Then about how they are a family of shinobi. As husband explained how he cannot replace a mother and fill her role in rising their child and so should do it herself even if it will be for a brief moment.

"Dying to make a better life for his child, that's the stuff you let the father handle." That being said Shinigami's hand covered in ancient writings and praying beads shot through man with blond hair and to ancient beast ripping it's Yang Half and sealing it into the said man.

Minato then summoned the altar to seal the rest of Kyuubi into his newborn daughter. As he placed the girl on the altar, Kyuubi, who had chains on itself loosened greatly thanks to being shrunken half its original size, moved its hand to kill the child it would be sealed in. But that was a futile attempt as both child's parents used they bodies to stop the attack as a result getting their bodies pierced by one of the beast's claws.

Summoning Gamatora and entrusting him to deliver the key of the seal to his teacher, Minato prepared himself to use Eight Trigrams Seal, he reminded Kushina that time was limited as Shinigami took out the tanto from his mouth.

"Naruto," She started "Don't be a fussy eater, eat a lot and grow up to be a big girl. Take your bath every day, go to bed early and sleep well! Make friends, it doesn't matter how many, just make sure they're real friends, people you can trust, even a few is enough! And study your ninjutsu… I was never good at it, maybe you'll be. Everyone has things they're good at and things they're not. Don't feel bad if you can't do it. Make sure you listen to the teachers. And remember to avoid the three vices of shinobi. As for men… I know you'll want a boyfriend someday, just try not to pick an asshole, try finding someone like your father… And be careful with Jiraya-sensei!"

As tears started to flow down her face she continued. "Naruto, you're going to experience a lot of pain and suffering. So remember who you are! Find a goal, a dream. There's so much more I want to say, to teach you about. I want to stay with you… I love you…" After she finished, Kushina apologized for taking her husband's time which he didn't mind, since everything he wanted to say was said by her.

Eight Trigrams Seal!

"You cut and ate his soul! Since when did you eat human souls?!" Shinigami was already back in his normal form, covering his "ears" while Life was screeching at him.

"I don't do that and have never done it before until that idiot used me to seal Kyuubi and as payment for summoning me, he gave me his soul that I had to eat! You think I liked that? Because I didn't! My stomach feels funny just thinking about it."

"Change of subject, what are we going to do with the Child of Prophecy, Karma?" Said deity removed its hands from its ears, Shinigamis mirroring its movements and grumbling something about mood swings. Life continued speaking:

"Kyuubi killed many villagers and shinobi and there's no way they will forgive it, or it's jailor. Most civilians and probably many shinobi, whose minds and judgement will be clouded with hatred and sadness of losing their loved ones will resent the child for she had no control over."

"You are right, Freya. That will be a problem, since human's cruelty knows no bounds, just like their stupidity…They won't even try to see the difference between jailor and its prisoner." Death also joined the conversation.

"And it will lead to the child being shunned by the villagers and them trying to get rid of it. She will be placed in the orphanage since her parents are dead. They will barely take care of it, just to keep it alive so they wouldn't incur the wrath of reinstated Sandaime Hokage. Then, when the little one will be old enough to start her education she will be sabotaged making her chances of survival on battlefield lesser. Shop owners probably won't let her near the stands either… so she will often be hungry…"

"We cannot let that happen! We have to do something Karma, Shinigami! If Naruto-chan will grow up weak or die on her first mission then Madara will be free to rule the world!" Life won't let a child suffer, foretold child or not.

"Correction, Madara's imposter." Death stated, he wasn't happy with how world's to be savior will live. But maybe, just maybe they could do something. Something that wouldn't disturb the flow of the universe, but that's impossible if any of them will act directly…

"We cannot do anything. If we will then the flow will be disturbed." Fate spoke unknowingly voicing Death god's thoughts.

"Unless we have someone else do it for us…" At that both Fate and Life snapped their heads at Death looking at him like he turned again in that monstrosity that humans imagined him to be.

"What do you have in mind, Shinigami?"

"It's really simple, Karma! We could use someone who was strong enough to defeat the real Madara Uchiha to help out the little one, do you follow me?"

"You damn sly bastard…" At this he smirked at his sister, while Life herself was adorning Cheshire cat grin. Fate just looked at both of them and nodded showing that it approved what Shinigami wanted to do. Getting his friends approval he snapped his fingers, one of receptionist arriving instantly.

"Your orders, Shinigami-sama?"

"Go fetch Hashirama Senju."

A/N: Thank you for reading the first chapter of HauntKage!

So what do you think? I really want to know if you liked it or not since this my first fic, so I really would appreciate reviews and criticism so I could improve my writing skills.

IMPORTANT! A MUST READ!: First two chapters are mostly told from Gods' side to set the stage for the story! Some OC's (who aren't deities) who will appear in the story are ONLY for the purpose TO BRING OUT one or another side of Hashirama and Naruto and help with character development or act as messengers, so OC's WON'T BE main characters. Thank you!

Till next time then!

Edit(mostly spelling): 2015/06/20