Send Off

Effie's thoughts when she had to send Peeta and Katniss to their death for the second time.

Effie is in a butterfly costume today, something meant for cheerful occasions. She wore it this time to try to cheer things up, but the expression on her face wiped any cheerfulness off the occasion.

How can anything be cheerful on this damned day?

Today is the day she will have to send Peeta Mallerk and Katniss Everdeen off to their deaths, or a single death and a broken heart.

She tried to smile, but was pretty sure it looked more like a grimace anyway.

The Capitol had always been a shining beacon to her, something that could never be wrong in their decisions. And they'd always given her and the other citizens a good life.

But now she doubts that.

If this was the feeling every parent had during the Reaping, how can the Capitol who started this entire bloody thing be right?

"Welcome." She manages to sound normal for a few words. "Welcome." She says again, letting reality sink in. "As we celebrate the 75th anniversary and third Quarter Quell of the Hunger Games."

No one claps.

"As always…Ladies first." Effie chokes a little.

Faces stare stonily back at her and Effie forces herself to move her feet over to the crystal ball and the single piece of paper that condemns her beloved…

Friend? No, the generation gap was too large for that.

Student? No, the feeling went deeper than that.

…daughter?

Effie had always longed for a daughter, but she had never came across the 'Perfect One'.

Her feet had carried herself back over to the microphone after her hands had picked up the paper without her consent.

"The female tribute from District 12…" Effie pauses, not for dramatics but simply because she cannot find it in her to continue. Katniss is looking at her feet, resigned to her fate.

"…Katniss Everdeen."

There, Effie had done it. She'd just condemned her sort-of daughter to a unknown and dangerous future with her boyfriend. With her future husband.

"Wonderful." Effie says. She loads her voice with sarcasm as her gaze flickers back to Katniss, who is frozen now.

She gestures at Katniss to come over, and as Katniss looks up with those eyes filled with despair and hopelessness, tears leak out unbidden from Effie's eyes.

She sucks in one breath, and reminds herself that she has to be strong, to carry this over, and hope that, against all odds, everything will work out well.

There are two papers in the second crystal ball, but that makes no difference. Either way, Peeta will not allow Katniss to go into that arena without him or any protection. Besides, Haymitch knows that he is best suited for the role as mentor, and it will give them the strategical advantage.

"And now for the men…" Effie draws out a piece of paper.

She walks a dainty step towards the microphone again, and slowly unfurls the piece of paper. Peeta and Haymitch are looking impatient, ready to get all these off with, but Effie wants to delay their terrible fate a little longer.

"Haymitch Aberthane."

There is absolutely no pause between the words and Peeta's volunteering in his place.

There is a brief argument between the two men, but the deed is done. Peeta takes his place on Effie's right.

Oh, the sweet children. Young love.

And they are going to their deaths because of it.

Effie is just about sobbing openly right now, and she doesn't care.

"Very well." She attempts to conclude this horrible ceremony. Effie swears, then and there, that she will never put another parent through it again, not if she can help it.

"The tributes from District 12." Effie drags it out a little bit longer with unnecessary introductions. "Katniss Everdeen," she pats Katniss' shoulder as she reins in the tears. Katniss is as responsive as a block of wood. "And Peeta Mallerk." Peeta is staring straight ahead, face set and expression grim. The sweet children, oh, the sweet children. Being sent off to their deaths at seventeen years old, engaged.

Mrs. Everdeen raises the first signal. The symbol that all of them are not happy with this. That they wish the two teens good luck. Little Primrose follows suit, looking far too sad for a thirteen year old child.

In the end, the entirety of District 12 are raising their hands, fingers pressed in that very same gesture, united against this cruel rule.

Effie wants to raise her hand too.

But she feels like she is not worthy of it. Effie had sent dozens of children off to their deaths before, why would this time be any different?

Because these are her children.

Beside her, the tributes raise their hands.

Effie knows that this is the wrong move the moment the Peacekeepers seize and drag them away.

"No!" Katniss screams, the first sound from her Effie has heard that day, and it breaks her heart. "I've got to say goodbye!"

Later that day, Effie locks herself in her room and cries so hard that she washes off all her makeup, which is actually a considerable amount.

Let the Capitol catch fire, for all I care. She thinks determinedly, striding into the train compartment. I will light the fire myself.