I stare at myself in the mirror, and the only thing I see is a big, fat failure. A failure as a hero of the Mushroom Kingdom, unworthy of praise and fortune. I never saw myself as a hero, I don't see why everyone else thinks I am one. I may save the princess numerous times, and defeat the evil koopa king, but what am I beyond that? What am I beyond this fabricated lie? A plumber who fixes the castles pipes from time to time, a plumber who unclogs toilets in other residents hones, a plumber who apparently is known as a hero. I'm just a plumber, not a hero, especially because of all the times I failed her. All those times I failed to protect the woman I love from the koopa that I hate. Who's responsible for protecting the princess? I am, and unfortunately have been doing an awful job of doing so.

I look at myself in the mirror again in the comfort of my own white bathroom. I take a glance at my hat, adorned with a red 'M' stitched on the front. People recognize my acts of heroism with this on, everytime a toad or other familiar species of the Mushroom Kingdom passes by me they always comment on my brave, heroic actions, as if I'm some kind of God or savior. I enjoy a little praise here and there, but do I really deserve it? I'm a plumber, not a hero, having all these people recognizing me for things I've done is nice and all, but I just want to be treated as a person, not some kind of object of praise. Besides, they inconsiderately fail to even think about how I feel: constantly getting overflowed with fans wanting autographs, being spied on every minute by the media that should mind their own business, and even if I hurt a single fly, they're all over me calling me a murderer or something. People treat me differently than my brother, I'm an object to them, and he's a ghost unseen by the public. Sometimes, I just wish I can switch lives with my brother, since he just gets to delve into relaxation and do whatever he feels like because no one would care what he did. All they care about is me, which gives him solitude. They need to learn that I'm no different than the rest of them, I'm just a plumber making a living just like them, and should be treated as such. Not for my heroic actions, or the adventures I've been on. Not for being a hero, just for being Mario, a plain, plumber serving the Mushroom Kingdom.

I lean in closer to the mirror, staring at my moustache. It's Dull, lacking luster, and needs to be brushed thoroughly. I always have to make it look presentable when I go out, along with my other features. But the first thing people notice about me-other than my red hat-is my shiny, smooth black moustache cascading in the sunlight; the black hairs glistening and glowing, nearly blinding everyone that gawks at its polished looks. I don't just make it look good to get attention, I carefully groom it so it's perfect for the princess for when I save her. Toadsworth always told me to look fashionable when saving the princess, otherwise, she might not reward you, or she'll run away to another castle and put a toad in her place. For her sake, I must groom myself and look clean and tidy. But, why must I do this? I surely hate spending an hour grooming myself so I'll look good saving the princess. I mean, a little grooming I don't mind at all, but excessive grooming is something else. Why waste an hour when I could save her earlier, before Bowser has more time to set up more traps or sneak her off to some other location.

I'm sure she doesn't mind the way I look when I save her, I mean, surely I'm covered in sweat and look hideous by the time I've actually arrived to rescue her. She would accept me the way I am nonetheless, since I've gone to the ends of the galaxy just to save her a couple of times. And, being in that cage, or whatever form of entrapment Bowser has in store for her, probably has some effect on her looks as well. How is she supposed to look presentable when she's been kidnapped and trapped in the same place for several days, not having a single oppurtunity to brush her teeth, or even put on an anti-persperent. I've kissed her dozens of times, and all of those times her breath reeked. Did I care? Not even the slightest. My breath probably smelled the same way, and the only thing that I worry about on the adventures is the princess. Not my breath, or my horrible body odor, and I'm sure she feels the same way. All she wants is to be rescued; she has bigger worries than smelling fresh or having the freshest breath. People should accept me for who I am, and not how fashionable I look, or how great my moustache is groomed. That doesn't say anything about a person other than they are insecure and selfish, only caring about themselves. Why should I follow Toadsworth's dumb rules, the princess is a person, and should be treated as such. I shouldn't have to walk up to her, pampered and groomed to oblivion, only to say hello. It's absolutely pointless. I shouldn't have to treat her any different because she's a princess.

I back away from the mirror, disgusted and decide to just comb my black moustache. I wasn't going to use the polish this time to give it that extra shine, because I don't want any extra attention I don't need. Afterall, who am I, a hero? Turning to the side, I look at my belly protuding from my blue overalls. Look at me, a fat failure who has been recognized as a hero for decades. I'm not surprised when some toads comment on my excessive weight. They all have a percieved image of a hero. A hero has to be fit and covered in muscle, not a round, plump belly. It makes me cringe when I walk around and people make comments about how Fat I am. I've seen them make comments about other toad's weights, who actually don't look fat at all. Then I would come back a few weeks later watching gaunt, emaciated toads walking past me, barely acknowledging anyone or anything. It's terrible how some toads treat others like that, especially how they treat me like that. A honorable, famous figure who is considered a hero. It truly breaks me up inside, hearing those comments nearly every day. I don't think I'll be able to take this any longer. What is the point of living the life given to you when people constantly try to take it away?

I grasp the edge of my mirror and pull, revealing a secret compartment behind it. The mirror swings open, attached to hinges holding it in place. Inside sits a small, white space with one item inside: a tiny, black box. I take it out and open it, this item will help me end it all. End all this madness in my life.

"Mario? Are you almost done in there?" Luigi asks behind the bathroom door.

"I'll be out in a minute, Luigi!" I shout back. I took out the item in the black box, a razor I've kept for an emergency situation like this one. I grasp it between my index finger and thumb. I gaze at the razor in my hand and climb into the white bathtub. Raising the razor to my neck, letting my hand uncontrollably tremble as I did so, I slowly drag it across my neck. Letting the blood trickle down to my clothes, I felt as if all my worries float away, and the meaning of my life finally opens up to me. All the pressure was too much for me to handle, being a hero isn't all that great. People think of becoming a hero all the time, but in reality, it's not that great. My head spins around and around, my vision begins to blur in ecstasy as the warm blood pours down my neck, soaking my clothes in crimson, red blood. I start to feel faint, the loss of blood is too drastic, but in the distance I hear Luigi calling my name again. I can barely hear it, even as I hear getting louder and louder. my razor is near the bathtub drain now, it must've slipped out of my fingers. My life is slipping away, not like I have a life anyway. Good thing I've finally found it; the meaning of my life has become very clear to me now.

"There is no meaning to life..."

AN: Readers, I have a question to ask you. What is the meaning of life?