A Betrayal

"She is not my girlfriend. And we are not in a relationship." Sameen Shaw said adamantly to Reese and Fusco. She said so loud and forcefully that it echoed inside the warehouse

Reese and Fusco loved teasing Shaw about Root, or Cocoa Puffs as Fusco liked to call but that has changed since Root almost died after getting shot by Samaritan and almost died not too long ago.

They thought that Shaw would finally admit and acknowledge her relationship with Root. They knew Shaw loved Root but they never could understand why Shaw was so stubborn to admit it. Shaw stayed by her bedside while Root laid unconscious for two days. Shaw stayed with her day in and day out through her recovery. They had never seen fear in her eyes before until they say Root lying on the ground in a pool of blood.

Shaw saw the look on both Fusco and Reese's faces and their smiles gone. Her heart started to beat and she knew that Root was behind her and heard what she said.

Root tried very hard to hide the pain and hurt of what she just heard from Shaw. Root thought that after what happened to her, and almost dying, Shaw would be more open about her feelings for her and their relationship. But she should have known better because this was Sameen Shaw.

But her perspective in life has changed. Almost dying made her think about things. She wanted to enjoy life and things that never bothered her before about Shaw now nagged at her. Things like saying "I love you" to her every night and Shaw never responding. And how when they are in public, she would reach out to hold her hand, only for Shaw to slap her hand away. Slowly, she started to drift away and just didn't try anymore.

Root tried to play it off and tried very hard to sound cheerful. "Hey, Harold said he wants you three back in the library."

"Just the three of us? What about you?"

"I have somewhere else to be."

Shaw could feel Reese and Fusco's eyes on them. She knew she had hurt Root but didn't want to look weak in front of them. So she pulled Root to the side and waited until Fusco and Reese were no longer in the warehouse.

"Hey, about what you heard. Ah…"

"It's alright Sameen. It's not like I haven't heard them from you before."

"Root. Come on. Look, how about we go to dinner later?"

"I have to be somewhere. I don't know what time I will be home."

"Oh okay. I will wait for you and maybe we can have a late dinner or something."

Root didn't respond, she was already walking away.

Reese and Fusco were already waiting for her outside by the car. They saw Root sped away and knew she was trying to fight off tears.

"You know, you're a real sweetheart Shaw."

"Shut up Reese. I don't want to hear."

"You may not want to but you are going to lose that woman. Keep hurting her and believe me when I say this, you will come home one day and she is gone."

"Whatever. Just drive will, you Fusco?"

Shaw waited for Root that night but Root didn't come home.

This went on for a month. And when Root came home, she slept on the couch. Root attended to relevant numbers again, taking her to different places.

Shaw could feel her world crumbling down. They never even made love anymore. She could still remember when Root would be the one to initiate their lovemaking. But now, the times that they both have been home and she tried to make love to her, Root would just tell her she was tired and sleep with her back turned to her or she takes her pillows and sleeps on the couch.

She wanted to say something. Apologize to her but she could never find the words.

One night, while Root was gone, she decided to go to a bar and drink. She got so drunk that when a good looking man approached her and offered to buy her a drink, she accepted and she flirted back. Flirting turned to kissing until she found herself in the motel room nearby. She was drunk but she knew she could have said "No" and she didn't. The moment he came inside her, she knew what she had done.

She came home the next morning to find Root with a bag in hand.

Guilt was written all over Shaw.

"I hope it was worth it. I hope the sex was at least good. Tell me Sameen, did you let him come inside you? Did you even think about me while he was thrusting himself inside you?"

"Root, please. I am so sorry."

"What are you sorry for Sameen? Didn't you say that we are not in a relationship? And that I am not your girlfriend? And that for a year all we were doing in this apartment was just fucking."

"You know that isn't true. Root please. I know I fucked up but I am going to do everything to…"

"No Sameen, what you did was the ultimate betrayal. I really, really hope he was fucking worth it."

Before Shaw could react, Root was out the door,

The next few months Root told the Machine to avoid assigning her to any number that required her to work with the team.

Reese, Fusco and Harold tried to ask Shaw what happened between her and Root but she never could bring herself to tell them the truth. She was so ashamed of what she had done she was disgusted with herself.

One night after their mission was done, Reese found Shaw in the library in the dark.

Reese turned on the lights and took an expensive bottle from Finch's cabinet.

"We are going to talk Sam. Something happened between you two that Root just disappeared. Did you end it with her?"

Shaw shook her head. And she tried so hard to hold back the tears but she couldn't.

Reese looked at Shaw and he knew what Shaw had done. For the first time, when he looked into her eyes, her guilt showed. It was so blinding that he almost couldn't bear to look at Shaw.

"Sam. Oh my god, tell me you didn't. Tell me I am wrong about it."

Shaw's silence was all the answer he needed.

"Why? And with whom?"

"Some random guy I met at a bar."

"You cheated on Root for a quick fuck with a random guy? What the fuck is wrong with you?"

Shaw remained silent.

"How the fuck could you do that to her? Was that your way of proving to yourself and to her that what you two have was nothing? Well you proved it."

"I love her."

"You mean you loved her."

"No, I have always loved her."

"Then why the fuck was it so hard for you to admit it?"

"Because admitting it would make it seem so real. It is something that I have avoided all my life. To care for someone so much."

"So your way was to cheat?"

"That was never the plan. I got drunk and things just got out of hand. And before I knew what was happening, it was too late."

"Have you tried to find her?"

"Believe me I tried. I miss her so much, John. I don't know what to do."

Reese didn't have an answer for Shaw.

A few weeks later they received a relevant number. Unbeknownst to Root, the Machine also gave the number to the Team.

Root got to the location first and seconds later, Reese and Shaw arrived.

The shock was shown on their faces when they realized that the Machine had both contacted them.

Root was irritated to find out what the Machine had done. She had set them up.

"I don't know what kind of game you are playing but I am leaving" She told the Machine.

"Root, wait." Reese blocked her way.

"John get out of my way. I cannot be here. I cannot look at her and not think about what she did."

Shaw dropped to her knees in front of Root and pulled Root's hand to her.

Sobbing, Shaw started to speak "I love you. I love you so much. I am so sorry for what I have done. And for what I have done to us. I know I betrayed you. I betrayed us. But I beg you, please just give me just one chance and I will spend the rest of my life making it up to you."

Root didn't want to hear any of it. She struggled to let Shaw loosen her grip on her arm. Shaw was trying so desperately to hold on to Root as she tried to pull her down with her. Tears continued to flow but Root remained cold.

"Let me go Sameen."

"Shaw let her go. You are hurting Root."

The moment Shaw let Root go, Root bolted out of the room.

Reese just watched as Shaw sat on the floor sobbing and looking so defeated.

A year later…

It was the end of summer and the start of fall, The air was cool. Root sat on the bench in Central Park enjoying the day watching the children play. She decided to be a mentor to one of the kids at a non-profit organization who houses children whose parents have either died or from abused homes. The kid's name she chose was Samantha. She has dark curly hair. She has a brilliant mind and has a knack for computers. But truth is, she chose her because Samantha reminded her of Sameen. It had been a year since the last time she saw her.

When all the pain and hurt was gone and she no longer needed the distraction to numb whatever feelings she had, she asked the Machine to stop giving her numbers. She told her that she was tired and can no longer to do this. The Machine understood and since then, she had never contacted her. This has been her life now for two months.

She turned her head when she felt eyes on her. Her heart started to beat rapidly and she knew who it was approaching her. No matter how long it had been since she last saw her, only Sameen Shaw could make her heart beat like this.

"The Machine gave me this location."

"You're still doing that?"

"I need something to distract me."

"Still the same old Sameen Shaw, I take it?"

Shaw didn't say anything at first,

"Same job, yes but I am not the same person." She muttered.

"So what are you doing here, really? There is no longer any bitterness in her voice.

"I have been watching you for an hour. When the Machine gave me this location I could not believe it was you. But even with your back turned I knew it was you. And when I saw your face, you're still as beautiful as I remember. Probably even more so now. And you look so happy."

Root smiled at the compliment. "I am."

"I thought of walking away and just leaving you alone but I couldn't move. I have only one chance and I know I have to try to see if you would give me that one chance."

Root didn't say a word and just nodded.

She saw Samantha running towards her waving and smiling.

Root took out a towel and a water bottle and handed them over to Samantha.

"Samantha, I'd you to meet Sam Shaw."

"Sam Shaw? Your friend, the one you talked about."

Shaw couldn't stop herself from smiling.

"Yes. The one and only. Sameen meet Samantha."

Shaw shook Samantha's hand and she couldn't help but notice how much Samantha resembled her when she was her age. Her heart fluttered with the thought that Root chose Samantha because of her.

"Root, I'm hungry can we go get lunch now?"

"sure. Would you like to join us for lunch Sameen?

"Definitely."

Shaw looked up at Root and liked what she saw in her smile. It was the smile she remembered so well, the smile that was only meant for her. It was a smile she had missed so much and finally after what seemed like eternity, she saw hope in her future. Root is back in her life and she will do anything and everything to make sure that Root stays in her life and this time, forever.

The End

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