I would like to thank Nefarious Seraph 13, who has provided me the idea for this story. Without her, this wouldn't be possible.

For J, who I have looked up to for the last decade or so—you have influenced me in ways I cannot even begin to explain. More Than Human continues to be the One That Started It All, and even though whatever I make now won't be able to hold a candle to it, you push me to at least try. So, thank you.

RECOVER
chapter 1

by P

The first bell resounded along the hallways of the Arendelle University as a sharp but welcome trill, signaling the end of the last period for those lucky souls who had no class after six in the evening.

"All right, class—that's it for today," announced the middle-aged man from the front of the room, and the once-quiet classroom erupted into a sea of murmurs. "Remember to read up on cyclohexanes! There may or may not be a test on this during our next meeting which is next week, not this Thursday, since I have a doctor's appointment I can't miss. You may go. Have a good weekend!"

The students rose from their seats, chairs screeching along the floorboards and conversations finally bursting to life. They filed out of the classroom almost with rehearsed precision, trickling out of the room one by one.

Neatly tucking away her laptop and papers from her last class, Elsa zipped up her bag and slung it over her shoulder. One of her classmates called to say goodbye and Elsa waved politely.

"Have a good weekend, Elsa!" the tall, leggy blonde said, glasses perched over her nose and smile almost tearing her face in two.

"You too, Honey," Elsa replied. She shuffled after the rest of her classmates and walked out of the room into the courtyard.

The walk to the in-campus dormitories bathed Elsa in warm afternoon sunlight. The rest of the occupants on the courtyard enjoyed the freedom that the four walls of a classroom tended to stifle, a plethora of noises and activities bringing a gaggle of students out to enjoy the remaining sun. Elsa stood off to the side on the paved walkway and tried not to bump into anyone as she walked.

Her phone vibrated in her pocket.

From: Anna

Hey Elsa! R u done w class?

Elsa swiftly typed back a reply. Her fingers grazed the buttons of her outdated phone, making her groan when certain buttons refused to click. She really should get it replaced, but she honestly didn't care as long as it worked.

To: Anna

Yes, I'm done. On my way back to the dorms.

The reply was almost instantaneous.

From: Anna

Ok. Don't forget to drink ur meds. :-) Imy, see u Saturday! Ily!

Elsa sighed. She typed back a quick Miss and love you, too and slipped her phone back into her pocket. Anna had just reminded her that she was running out of her meds.

Turning on her heel, Elsa went on a tangent and headed in the direction of the campus bus stop.

The City of Arendelle largely occupied the side of a mountain, the city mainly sitting in the middle of the foot of it and a giant lake. Arendelle U was perched a little up the mountain, and it normally took a 15-minute drive down to get to the city center. Famous for its freshwater fish made into appetizing dishes, Arendelle was never at a shortage of people, from its residents to its tourists. It was a bustling epicenter of life.

Which was why Elsa would rather make the hour-long trip to the neighboring town of Burgess, taking the bridge that crossed the lake to the island across Arendelle.

Elsa stepped into the only drugstore in the small town of Burgess. The place was a bland white, the light from above humming a low buzz, shelves filled with rows upon rows of colorful medicine bottles and packets. She approached the counter and was greeted by a familiar friendly face.

"Hello, Tracy," Elsa greeted politely, and the brunette at the counter smiled warmly.

"Hey, Elsa! Here to pick up your meds?" Tracy asked conversationally, already walking to one of the shelves and plucking out a box. Elsa dropped by the place so many times in the past three years that every employee knew her by name, face and medication.

Elsa nodded. "Yes, please. Thank you."

Tracy expertly pressed buttons at the register as she rung up Elsa's purchase. The blonde kept quiet throughout the ordeal, thankful that Tracy was a kind soul that understood her predicament. She paid without a word.

"Here you go," Tracy said amiably, handing over a brown paper sleeve with two thin boxes inside, which Elsa took gratefully. "Take care and come again!"

Elsa nodded again and turned on her heel, walking out of the store.

She pushed open the door to the drugstore and walked out, the fresh air brought along by spring settling over her like a comfortable blanket. The sky was darkening to a rich, deep blue and the bright white lights of the shop behind her shone past the glass windows and onto the pavement of the sidewalk.

The walk to the bus station was a good ten minutes from the drugstore, so with her hands in her pockets and scarf snug around her neck, Elsa carefully pocketed her medication and hurried her way back before night could fully take over.

When Elsa walked into her dorm room, her roommate stared at her pointedly, one hand holding a compact mirror and another one pointing a tube of lipstick in Elsa's direction. "Have you been eating my Pop Tarts?"

Elsa blinked. "Excuse me?"

The green-eyed girl sighed dramatically, waving her lipstick around. "I can't find my smores Pop Tarts."

"Maybe you finished them already?"

Idina seemed to ponder upon this before shrugging. "Perhaps. Where'd you come from?"

Elsa shed her coat and placed her bag and keys on her desk, and moved to her closet to change into comfortable clothes. "I went to town to get… you know."

"You went to town? Darn, should've asked you to buy Pop Tarts."

"Next time." Elsa shrugged. She glanced at Idina, black hair sleek and dressed in the tightest jeans known to man. "Where are you going?"

"Out," Idina declared, smacking her bright red lips as she put away her make-up.

"I can see that. Do you want to be more specific?"

"I'll either end up sucking dick or taking dick," Idina snipped.

Elsa gagged. "Sorry I asked."

"Anyway, I'm off." Idina grabbed a tiny purse and slung it over her shoulder. "Will you be okay here by yourself?"

Idina wasn't the easiest person to get along with, but she was an understanding person, in a weird, slightly insulting, roundabout way—and what mattered is that she and Elsa got along well. Or, at least, got along decently.

Idina was a theater major, and was therefore highly sociable and fun-loving. Unlike Elsa, who preferred to stay indoors and alone, Idina was almost always out and about and surrounded by people. Thankfully, she understood Elsa's need to be alone and away from people—or, at least, didn't bother her about it, especially after a really extensive talk when Idina found Elsa's packet of antidepressants.

Two years of rooming together, Elsa really couldn't ask for anyone else—and to a point, it could be taken quite literally. If she lived with anyone else, she had to do the whole life-story thing again. She would have to explain her meds and what procedures to be taken if anything bad happened. And what if they weren't as understanding—okay, tolerant—as Idina? Elsa didn't even want to think about it.

"I'll be fine," Elsa pressed.

Idina shrugged. "'Kay. You know how to reach me."

"Have fun," Elsa said sincerely, and Idina just gave her a wink and flipped her dark hair over her shoulder.

"Of course. See you tomorrow!" And with that, she waltzed out of the room.

When the door clicked, Elsa flung herself on her bed and took a deep breath. The wall clock above the door to their room read 9:18. She picked up her phone from its spot on her nightstand and checked her to-do list.

Late February meant the beginning of midterms preparation, and Elsa sighed. Sometimes, she got sick of studying, but it's not like she had anything else to do. Maybe if she had friends—or even acquaintances, really—she'd lead a more interesting life. But she didn't.

Her stomach dropped, and she shut her eyes. No, no, no. The misery came unbidden, as if clawing at her heart and making her brain numb. Sometimes it got like this, where sadness just slowly latched onto her as if it would never let go, words like worthless or useless echoing in her ears despite the silence of the room.

Elsa pressed her lips together and whimpered, setting down her phone and pulling her knees to her chest. She tried to breathe, to stay calm, but something made her heart hurt. It's been this way for years, and she'd learned to stop crying. But sometimes…

Taking a deep breath, she scrambled for her medication and her water bottle from her purse. Popping a pill, she took a large swig and twisted the cap shut, pushing off her things from her bed.

She settled under her sheets without bothering to turn off the lights, and forced herself to sleep with heavy thoughts and an uneasy heart.

Idina woke her up the next morning.

"Hey, you okay?" she asked, voice tinged with concern. "You missed your first class."

Elsa pushed herself to sit and rubbed her eyes. "Yeah," Elsa croaked, the words sliding thick out of her throat. "I just… I'm okay. Sorry."

"You sure?" Despite Idina's seemingly uncaring nature, she was actually very considerate of Elsa. Which was shocking at first, but welcome and appreciated nonetheless.

Elsa nodded. "Yeah, I'm good."

Idina's face was still contorted with worry, so Elsa changed the subject after she took a moment to fully wake herself up. "What time did you get back last night?"

"Past midnight." Idina sighed and pointed to Elsa's desk. "I got you a honey donut and some decaf on my coffee run this morning."

Elsa frowned. "Decaf?" she said distastefully, trying to lighten the mood.

"Hey, I got you coffee."

The blonde flinched. "Right. Thanks."

Idina rolled her eyes. "You know, I vaguely recall a lecture that brought up something about people with anxiety disorders and how they should stay away from caffeine."

"I said thanks," Elsa groused.

Idina rolled her eyes. "'Kay, I'm going now. Bye."

"Bye." And with that, the door shut closed.

Elsa rubbed her face and stared at the mess at the bottom of her bed. With a yawn, she picked up her shower necessities and marched to the bathroom, staring at the ground all the while. She was grateful everyday that she stayed in one of the two all-girls dormitories on campus—no awkward run-ins with the opposite sex.

Her shower gave her what not a wink of her sleep last night didn't—relief and relaxation. The lukewarm water was soothing against her skin, purging her of last night's distress. After a quick brush of her teeth, she marched back into her room like a walking cloud, wrapped in her fluffy white bathrobe and a towel on her head.

Still looking like a Japanese Spitz, Elsa gratefully munched on the breakfast her roommate so graciously provided for her, not for the first time. Idina really was a nice girl underneath all that sass and spunk.

Chewing thoughtfully on her doughnut, she picked up her packet of Xanax from the floor and sat down on her bed, legs crossed underneath her. She popped the foil top of one of the plastic pockets and rolled the peach-colored pill in her hands, staring at it blankly.

Elsa couldn't remember what life was like before antidepressants. She had a vague recollection of it—everything was happier, more vibrant and colorful compared to the dull muted shades of what once was that seemed to decorate her vision.

Elsa supposed it started the moment she could divide her current life into two phases—pre-Accident and after-Accident.

Pre-Accident was a happy family of four with her, Anna, and their parents. Pre-Accident was living in Arendelle in their house, with their dog Marshmallow. Pre-Accident was Elsa's friends and Anna's playmates. Pre-Accident was celebrating Mother's Day and Father's Day.

And then there was the Accident.

The Accident was a ride home from something Elsa couldn't even remember anymore. She doesn't remember much about the circumstances surrounding the event, come to think of it—just her and her parents in the car, screaming and fire and blood and helplessness and glass and pain and blood, so much blood, and then staring into the bright white lights of a hospital, pale-faced and stiff and horrified.

She slipped into shock, was what the doctors said. It took her two full days to recover, even just slightly.

Barely brushing the age of eighteen—was it a week or two before the Accident that she celebrated her birthday?—she thought that her life would finally begin; college and boys and friends and all these new things that she was beyond thrilled to try. She was an adult now—she could do whatever she wanted!

But Elsa was catapulted into a nightmare. Old enough to serve as Anna's legal guardian, old enough to explain to her fourteen-year-old sister that their parents were dead, old enough to sign papers upon papers upon papers of things that her aunt Jennifer and uncle Chris had to explain to her.

Old enough to prepare a funeral service for her parents.

The first few months after the Accident had Elsa waking up and screaming from nightmares she couldn't remember come morning. Time and time again, she broke out into sobs without warning. It was several times worse than a nightmare; especially when she accidentally hit Anna across the face during one of her panic attacks. Elsa choked on her guilt and begged her aunt and uncle to let her see a professional.

Elsa was—and still continued to be—more than grateful for her aunt and uncle. They helped her through everything. They served as her and Anna's guardians, taking them under their wing and giving them a home and an education. They supported them—at least, Elsa promised to herself, until she could stand on her own two feet and provide for Anna.

Her aunt and uncle agreed to sign her up for sessions with a therapist but they didn't last long—at the time, she was starting college soon, and she couldn't push that back. But it was long enough for them to give her a prescription of antidepressants and some procedures to implement if she has episodes.

Long enough to diagnose her with post-traumatic stress disorder.

When Elsa entered the Arendelle U as a freshman, the only thing she did was to lock herself up in her dorm room and study. She threw herself into her schoolwork, quickly shooting down any attempt of social interaction. The only person who she spoke to for a good six months was Idina. And that was when she found Elsa's packet of Xanax.

Elsa stared at the tiny pill blankly before snapping out of her reverie to look at the wall clock. 11:32. She got up and snatched the cup of decaf from her desk and swallowed the pill before gulping large amounts of coffee.

She'd better head to class before she was late.

Today was a particularly long school day, and Elsa was just glad it was over.

Slipping out of her philosophy class with practiced ease, the blonde walked the familiar route from the classrooms building to the West Library. The mid-afternoon sun was bright in the sky, and rays that escaped the covered rooftops and walls ran over her skin with comfortable warmth.

Elsa rounded the corner that would take her up the marble steps to the university library. She stopped, eyebrows raised at the yellow plastic chains wrapping around the entire front of the stairs. A giant sign hung from the closed doors of the library.

THE LIBRARY IS CLOSED FOR REPAIR, it read, SORRY FOR THE INCONVENIENCE.

Elsa looked around—the area was deserted, except for her and a janitor close by. She immediately kept walking.

Where to now? she asked herself, biting her lip and fidgeting. The study halls in the other AU libraries that were usually designated for group meetings were always full of students, and her dorm room had her bed. She weighed her options before pulling out her phone.

To: Idina

Where else can I study in school? West is closed. Sorry for bothering you.

Elsa pressed SEND and almost instantaneously, her screen darkened flashing Idina. She pressed the green button.

"Hello?"

"The library's closed!" Idina all but shouted into the phone, making Elsa wince and pull the phone away. "I forgot to tell you. They busted a pipe and a third of the place is, like, drenched."

"Oh. Okay. Do you know where else I can go?"

"You're a junior here and you don't know where else to study?"

"I don't go out much," Elsa huffed.

"Right. You don't—waaaa—t—oooo back—dorm?" Idina's voice crackled through the earpiece.

"What?" Elsa adjusted the phone against her ear. "I can't hear you. You're choppy."

"Try—wait a sec." Several 'excuse me's, 'watch where you're going's and more than a few giggles later, Idina's voice came through much more smoothly. "Can you hear me now?"

Elsa nodded, and then realized that Idina couldn't see her. "Yeah, better."

"Okay. Anyway, you don't want to go back to the dorm?"

"My bed. Its gravitational pull is strong."

"Okay, weirdo. Anyway, there's a coffee shop that doesn't have a lot of people, it's called Old William. You can try there."

A ten-minute walk later and she stopped in her tracks.

Old William was so full. Actually, it was beyond full—it was practically bursting at the seams.

Elsa stared through the glass walls helplessly, almost cringing at the surplus of university students cramped in such a tiny space. Just looking at the amount of people made her want to curl into a ball and cry.

Deftly walking away, Elsa checked her watch. It was still early—just a little past four, so she still had time to look. She could go outside campus into the city proper, but that was a 15-minute ride away, and she wasn't sure if she could find anything there. Elsa paused, turning back to the more-than-crowded coffee shop.

Imagining herself trying to fit into a teensy space between any of those people made her skin scrawl and sent her heart racing. She turned away and squeezed her eyes shut, taking deep, calming breaths.

Wait, she recalled briefly. There was a small shop next to the pharmacy she always went to in Burgess. Not too big, and Burgess didn't have a lot of people…

Elsa didn't spare a second thought and made her way to the bus stop.

Aha! I was right!

Elsa pushed the door open and entered a small, cozy café with a neon sign reading Burgess Brew near the wooden door. It looked very old-fashioned—brick walls, wooden furniture and yellowed lanterns hanging from the ceiling. A big wall of glass sat at the front, perpendicular to a barely occupied wooden bar lined with cushioned stools. Relaxing acoustics played overhead and the place was warmly blanketed with the smell of freshly brewed coffee. And the place wasn't full!

Elsa's insides stirred with delight.

Walking up to the counter, she settled for pointing at a chocolate cake in the glass case and an order of a warm macchiato. Picking up her purchase, she settled on the last stool nearest to the window, farthest from anyone in the establishment.

She booted up her laptop and waited for the AU Library to load, taking small comforting sips of her coffee. Her blue eyes drifted towards the late afternoon sky, taking in the light pinks and oranges and baby blues.

She observed the people that passed by, sometimes envying them for their normalcy. Elsa watched people hanging out with their friends or family, carrying boxes of treats, even the ones screaming at their phones as they walked. She envied the angry ones the most—they had an outlet to pour out all the frustration they felt.

Elsa wished she was that lucky.

She was abruptly pulled from her thoughts when a small blonde girl started knocking on the glass window in front of her. The little girl was saying something, but her voice was muffled through the glass. She looked down at the grinning child, and she gave a small smile in return.

The girl was suddenly pulled away, and she looked up to see a pale-haired boy about her age, raising a hand with his face twisted in apology. Elsa just nodded with her lips pressed together in a tight smile and watched as the smaller girl jumped up and down with her arms raised.

The boy laughed and picked up the little girl, bouncing her in his arms for a little, before flashing Elsa another apologetic grin and walking off to the pedestrian lane. Elsa watched his retreating back until he vanished into the sea of pedestrians.

Elsa turned back and found the AU Library page fully loaded.

It was nearing ten in the evening when Elsa got back to her dorm room.

"Hey," Elsa greeted when she entered their dorm room, closing the door behind her. She had one hand wrapped around a paper bag. Idina gave a wave, not taking her eyes off the screen of her laptop. "Have you eaten?

Idina tapped something on her keyboard. "What?"

"Have you eaten?"

"No. Why?"

"Here; I got you a sandwich." Elsa gingerly tossed a paper bag at her roommate.

Idina sat up and unwrapped her dinner. "Oh, thanks."

"No problem."

Comfortable silence settled between the two of them.

"Thanks for helping me out, by the way," Elsa started.

"Huh?"

"About where to study. I never really know where to go here."

Idina swallowed. "No big deal. Were you studying for midterms?"

"Yeah."

"Thank God theater doesn't have written midterms. Where'd you go?"

"I went into town. I found a coffee shop that didn't look like it was going to blow up because of all the people."

"What time did you get there?"

"Around five."

Idina almost choked on her sandwich. "Elsa, it's past ten in the evening. And you're still going to study?"

"I've got a hot date with Adler," Elsa jested lightly.

"Did you know that I hated my psychology class? Way too many people to remember. Like, every theory is attached to someone. What's up with that?" Idina shook her head. "I don't know how you put up with it."

Elsa just smiled. "It's my major; I kind of have to."

"Whatever. I'm gonna watch more mindless TV; throw a pillow at me if you need me."

Elsa nodded and began fiddling with her notes. A few minutes in, her phone pinged.

From: Anna

Meds all done?

Elsa typed back a reply.

To: Anna

Still studying. Will take them in a bit

From: Anna

Ok, don't forget! And come home soon, Marshmallow n I miss u :)

Attached to the message was a photo of a fluffy Samoyed with its tongue out, smiling at the camera. Elsa smiled.

To: Anna

I miss you guys, too. See you soon. Kiss Marshy for me. :)