...Why am I writing yaoi again? Oh yeah, because I need to for the 28 Days of Love Challenge, as well as the Over 10K Oneshot Challenge (both on the Digimon Fanfiction Challenge forum) , and the Random Generator on the RANDOM! forums ( No. 1 - Hunger).

Boy, what a rough road this has been. It took months to plan, months to write, and an extra month waiting on betas who ultimately ended up too busy to completely read it. But here we are, finally.

Warnings for insanity, lots of stream-of-consciousness, and of course yaoi. If you're still here, enjoy!

Dsiclaimer: I don't own Digimon. Frontier would be a lot more twisted if I did.

Selfsame Supersedure

"I became insane, with long intervals of horrible sanity." - Edgar Allen Poe

There is a Digiegg on the railroad tracks. At least, the Digimon think it's a Digiegg. It is much bigger than the usual Digiegg, about five feet tall, and pure white with a pearly sheen. It didn't appear in the Village of Beginnings, but at the edge of the ever-expanding Digital World. Many a ill-motivated Digimon have tried to break it. Even Megas have failed.

Not sure what to make of the strange egg, the Digimon have built a shrine around it. Many Digimon stop by in wonder, or in boredom. Some say one day it will hatch a god, or a demon, unlike any other existence.

Meanwhile, it sits, silent as a tomb.

IIIIII

But before the egg, beyond any current Digimon's memory, there was a boy.

Koji studied his reflection on the train, as the Trailmon whisked him away to the Digital World. His mirror self's impassive blue eyes stared back, discontent. He was alone on this living locomotive, contemplating why he had agreed to this. Wasn't that how kids disappeared, by listening to the requests of unknown voices on their cellphones? He marveled at his stupidity, yet he did so without remorse.

I'm here because something's missing from me, the black-haired boy thought. I came because I need something else in life.

A sudden something seized his mind, and for a moment he didn't know who he was, or what he was, but this power was incredible-and then it was gone, like a light switch had been flicked on and off. He stood there, absently gazing through his glass double, as he tried to comprehend what just happened.

He marveled at his stupidity more seriously.

IIIIII

Soon, he found himself marveling at the stupidity of the boy known as Takuya.

The other kids were alright. Zoe was a temperamental girl, but usually she had her heart in the right place. Tommy was a whiny little brat, but considering the harshness of the Digital World, Koji couldn't entirely blame him. JP was a fat kid who didn't quite get the point of friendship…but then again, neither did Koji. Sure, he had friends, but none that would risk anything serious for him, and vice versa. Much like these kids: they weren't great, but they were decent, and in a world of monsters you couldn't be too picky about what other humans were available for company.

But Koji couldn't stand Takuya. The goggle-wearing boy clearly didn't think of anyone but himself, with his careless, happy-go-lucky attitude. The brown-haired kid considered himself leader, even though he rarely did any leading or planning at all. And then he would go try to boss Koji around like he was a dog or something. The self-declared leader was one of the main reasons he avoided the main group of Legendary Warriors at first.

That's right, five kids had been summoned to the Digital World so they could become Digimon. Sort of. They were still human most of the time, but when each of them found their own Spirit, they could become the embodiment of the Legendary Warriors, reincarnations of Digimon long past. Takuya had the Spirit of Fire. Koji had the Spirit of Light, the same presence that had first pulsed through him when he arrived at the Digital World.

When he finally found his Spirit, he stopped marveling at his stupidity and just marveled as he digivolved into Lobomon for the first time. Suddenly he was no longer a pathetic kid who was smacking monsters with a pole, but a noble humanoid wolf with swords of light to sear his foes. He was just like the samurai in those old movies he liked to watch in secret. He was strong, in a way that endless training in petty flesh could never provide.

He reveled in being Lobomon, sometimes roaming and playing in that human-like wolf form for hours on end. Others would have criticized him for being frivolous, which was precisely why he didn't want to be around others. Some things were done best absent of critics. Like Takuya.

Other times he would just lie under the stars, holding up his hand as it summoned a blue-white ring of fractal code. So he was data here like everything else. Run his D-Tector over the barcode, and he became a Legendary Warrior. He was enthralled by the digital ring, memorizing the intricate pattern of lines belonging only to him. Part of him was fascinated that he was even still human at all.

It was about that time when he started to have the dreams too. A dragon fiend, in crimson armor with a golden mane and orange wings, battled against a bipedal mechanical wolf in white-and-blue armor who wielded twin golden swords. They fought ferociously on the green hills, tackling, kicking, clawing, biting, and spitting gouts of fire and light. They roared and howled loud enough to make the three moons tremble. But they didn't care about the world around them, instead ceaselessly fighting on even as other Digimon watched.

The great fight looped continuously in his sleep, but Koji didn't mind that. The battle was fun rather than nightmarish to watch, and the days were so full of real action that he didn't have much time to think about imaginary combat. He started hanging out with the others more, until he found himself a daily member of their pack. Yes, pack: wolves could be alone, but they were really meant to be in packs.

…That was a strange way of thinking.

Arguments with ever-positive, ever-stupid Takuya were not so strange, however. In fact they often happened on a regular basis. Yet slowly, reluctantly, Koji felt himself respecting Takuya…no, that wasn't quite right. Found him worthy, perhaps? The arguments became less satisfying, not because he liked Takuya better (well, he sort-of did, he supposed) but because he wanted to physically fight Takuya.

And sometimes, Koji got his wish. As humans, Koji easily outmatched Takuya. Takuya had good kicks and speed because he was a soccer player, but Koji was trained in martial arts. But it was when they took on the forms of Agunimon and Lobomon that the battles became interesting. Upon evolving both of them were equal, with fire and light attacks clashing and mixing. It was living the dream that cycled endlessly in Koji's slumbers. And, unlike all other battles, Koji could observe and even admire his opponents strength and lithe movements. The way his opponent's muscles expanded and contracted as he blocked and called forth his own fiery retaliation. How the fire spiraled into life around Agunimon's fist and shot forward and Ow! he should've dodged that.

He started noticing odd little details about Takuya too. How he adjusted his gloves when he was nervous (Why did he always wear gloves anyway?). The way his well-toned lower calves peeked between his short pants and his high socks (Well he was a soccer player). The particular curve of his neck (Why would he even notice something like that?). The way his eyes weren't just brown, but a storm of sepia, auburn, and gold flecks in a sea of russet (Why were his eyes so fascinating, dammit, Takuya was a guy, and Koji was not into guys. The many girl magazines he liked to stare at back home proved that much.)

Sometimes he caught Takuya gaping at him a little too long, before turning away too quickly. That didn't make Koji feel any more comfortable.

The whole thing was awkward, and neither spoke of it, at least openly. But it was bearable, at least compared to all the other life-threatening situations they were sucked into on a daily basis. Focus on saving the world now, worry about Takuya's lingering glances later.

If nothing else, they could always beat the crap out of each other instead.

And then Koji found his Beast Spirit.

The other half of the Legendary Warrior of Light, the Beast Spirit KendoGarurumon was a giant white-and-gold mecha wolf on all fours. Transforming into it was much more painful, as raw energy ripped through him. But it was much more powerful…And much harder to control. The first time he used it Koji ended up running into trees more than his enemy. He even ended up running off the cliff, and survived only because he forced himself to dedigivolve and grabbed onto a branch.

But after that, he had no further control issues. If being Lobomon was like being a samurai, then being KendoGarurumon was a lot like being an actual dog. Now he knew why dogs were so happy all the time: they got to be dogs. Only now he could be both human and dog, the master of the man and the beast.

Well, that was what he thought.

He dreamed again about the dragon and the wolf Digimon (for he knew he had to be Digimon) but the dream was much more vivid this time. The colors were brighter, the noise was louder, and Koji could even smell the upturned dirt and smoke from the flames. He felt like a witness, not someone watching a recording. He took in the scene with a new awe, felt new excitement rise as the wolf knight slammed the dragon fiend into the ground. Before the dragon fiend could get up again the wolf knight pounced and bit into its shoulder. The dragon roared, an almost confused bellow, as a fractal code encircled it.

The wolf knight let go and grinned broadly. "I am a wolf. Now I will make you wolf." It summoned a band of fractal code around its hand, and grinded that barcode against the dragon fiend. A tempest of sparks flew as a crackling screech and the dragon's cries tore through the air. The wolf knight sunk its fangs into the dragon beast again, snarling.

Koji found himself being sucked into the struggle, until he felt the heat of the dragon below him, tasted the saltiness of surprisingly tender flesh between his teeth. He was the apex predator, the emperor of beasts. When he devoured this sovereign of wyrms, then they would be-

A soccer match. A cafeteria full of kids having a food fight. A boy he had never seen before, about Tommy's age. A boy he had seen too much of lately: Takuya, cheerfully chatting with a group of boys on the way to school. Takuya, studying hard for a test he knew he couldn't pass. Takuya, chasing his little brother around the yard trying to get his goggles back. Takuya, Takuya, Takuya, why was it always-

Something hit him and sent him reeling to the side. Suddenly he was Koji again, and it was night instead of day. And it wasn't the dragon beast but Takuya who was on the ground, panting. He gaped at Koji with eyes that screamed bewilderment, panic and fury all at once. His hand gripped one side of his neck, part of which seemed to be glowing.

"Back off, faggot!" Takuya spat, hanging around only a moment before he fled the scene.

Koji felt any words wither within him, as the implications sank in. When did the dreams take over his reality? What the hell had he been doing? He couldn't remember anything not tainted by the vivid visions.

Am I…losing it? Insanity was never something Koji worried about before. He might not have always fit in perfectly with society, but he was no outcast. He never muddied up his mind with thoughts of excessive self-doubt.

…Maybe this Digital World was even more dangerous than he thought. But the others still seemed to be fine…

He reached up to rub his head, and saw that his body was glowing white. Soon that light faded, however, leaving him to stumble back to camp in pure darkness.

IIIIII

Understandably, Takuya stayed far away from Koji for the next few days. Koji didn't try to bridge the distance with apology. I'm sorry didn't even begin to cover something like that. No one questioned the new bites and scratches: they were constantly in battle and in rough terrain, after all.

But it made Koji hesitant to use his Beast Spirit in any way, though he had the awful feeling it was like trying to scoop escaped smoke back into a bottle. Already he felt its miasmic influence, as strangely arousing visions of Takuya infected his sleep, and sometimes his waking hours too. No he was not like that, he was not-

Then Takuya got his Beast Spirit as well. Nearly killed everyone with it too. Not even Koji had been entirely swallowed by his wilder evolution (at least not immediately). Takuya was horrified when he finally returned to reason. He avoided everyone, not just Koji, until Takuya had to activate his Beast Spirit to save Tommy. As far as the others knew, Takuya had mastered BurningGreymon.

Koji knew better, as Takuya's behavior grew more edgy and his smile grew more strained. Meanwhile Koji's own gazes lingered longer as own mind kept turning traitor on him. Still they stayed silent about that subject, talking (and arguing) over everything else instead.

Koji wondered how the others didn't notice. Then again, maybe they did notice. They had Spirits too, after all. Certainly they must be having their own unexpected side effects. So perhaps they kept quiet to let him and Takuya keep some of their dignity. Or perhaps they gossiped behind their backs. Or perhaps they were too wrapped up in her own mental confusions to recognize other's struggles with sanity.

…Some team this was turning out to be.

IIIIII

It all started over a stupid run. Ever since Koji retrieved his Beast Spirit, he felt increasingly frequent urges to digivolve and rush out into the wild. He had surrendered (again) to the feral desire to be KendoGarurumon when he came across Takuya as BurningGreymon. Flaming forest wreckage lay before and around him, as the great dragon puffed smoke and embers. Koji suddenly thought of Godzilla. That thought wasn't as funny as he had hoped it would be.

The winged beast suddenly whirled to Koji, and Koji felt his mechanical body tense. He eased a little, however, when he saw that the dragon beast's eyes were normal and not shining red. So Takuya still had control of himself, at least.

"What are you even doing here?" BurningGreymon-Takuya shouted, letting out a roar that sounded more agonized than angry. "Can't a guy get any privacy around here? You always have to be right there, no matter where I go! I don't like you! I'm serious!"

"Finally, something we can agree on," said KendoGarurumon-Koji, not expecting the sudden, almost desperate tirade. Still, it was better than the berserk BurningGreymon from Takuya's first digivolution. Ranting Takuya he could endure. Barely.

"Then go away already!" BurningGreymon-Takuya yelled, releasing another loud roar as flames spurted from the joints in his armor. When KendoGarurumon-Koji didn't flee immediately (He was too hypnotized by the flames) the dragon snarled. "I said go away!" He shot toward him.

KendoGarurumon-Koji dodged the clumsy charge, and soon the two were locked in combat. Neither of them had fought each other with their Beast Spirits before, and it was bizarrely electrifying, nothing like their civil sparring with their humanoid Spirits. They tackled and kicked and clawed and bit and oh God it was the never-ending dreams all over again, wolf versus dragon, only this time he was losing because he was already tired from his run. And suddenly he wasn't a wolf but a person collapsed on the ground, with embers falling around him like snow.

BurningGreymon's massive claws crashed around Koji, pinning him. Koji stared up at the victor, tremors shooting through his so-human body. The dragon Digimon was unnervingly quiet, except for soft growling. Koji saw the dragon fiend, then BurningGreymon, then the dragon fiend again, the two images rapidly switching and overlapping until Koji wasn't sure what he was looking at anymore.

Then abruptly the dragon was Takuya (mostly: Koji still saw flickers of something much greater), still over Koji, still unnaturally silent. The boy's expression was indecipherable, his weight unexpectedly heavy. Koji couldn't move, could barely even breathe as Takuya's mesmerizing eyes studied his body. That basilisk gaze beckoned to something that made his soul shudder, something not-Koji that wanted to bellow back.

The dragon boy stroked Koji's body. It was neither an aggressive or affectionate motion, merely inquisitive, like he had never touched a human before. Then the faintest of smiles appeared on his face, as his fascinating eyes locked onto Koji's. "Frightened?" he asked, voice quiet, almost as entrancing as his stare. It was so different from Takuya's usual loud, brash speech.

The teasing challenge in the dragon boy's tone was enough to anger Koji back to his senses. He pushed him off and got back onto his feet, glaring. "Who are you? 'Cause you're sure as hell not Takuya!" he barked, though he suspected he already knew.

"Fire," the dragon boy replied, also standing. "Dragon." He looked down and placed a hand on his chest, and his smile grew more smug. "Mine."

Rage and disgust flared abruptly in Koji. "He's not yours! Let him go! Takuya!"

The dragon boy just chuckled, as he began to walk toward Koji. Every step incinerated the ground below. "Wolf."

Koji snarled. He would fight if he had to. He hastily whipped out his D-Tector and summoned a ring of his fractal code around his hand.

With ungodly speed the dragon boy rammed Koji into a tree. While Koji was stunned the dragon boy called forth his own ring of code around his hand, and grinded it against Koji's exposed code.

"My wolf," chortled the dragon boy.

Koji barely heard him, as the dragon boy pressed his body closer to his. Koji seized up like he was being electrocuted. His head spun with memories that weren't his: times of angels, demons, school, battles, soccer, birthdays, death-days, desires for creation and destruction at once, desires for desire itself. The fragmented thoughts cut into Koji like a thousand shattered swords, threatening to reduce his mind to splinters, and the dragon boy's body was so hot, and he felt so hot, and those basilisk eyes, and screaming then howling then hunger-

Reality slowly came back into focus. Koji was slumped against the tree, with a scared Takuya shaking him. His first instinct was to bite him, but he caught himself and shook his head vigorously instead. His body still prickled with electric numbness. "Takuya, you…"

Takuya released Koji's shoulders, but he showed little relief. "God Koji, I…I don't know what happened to me. I…I'm not that kind of person, really…" He looked almost on the verge of tears.

"Takuya…" Koji began. Strangely he felt pity instead of anger. Then again, this was something Takuya had little control over, much like Koji had little control over KendoGarurumon's own overwhelming desires…

Takuya stood up, turning away. "You should stay away from me. Listen to me next time I tell you to scram, okay?"

Koji got back on his feet too, and noticed how Takuya was trembling. "Should I scram now?"

Takuya's back remained turned. "…Yeah, I think that would be good."

Koji nodded, even though he knew Takuya couldn't see it, and headed back for camp.

IIIIII

Life flashed by. Often it flashed before Koji' eyes, as he narrowly repelled death again and again. Everything happened so fast that he rarely had the time to reflect on his increasingly strange actions and mental states. How he and Takuya were battling each other in both human and Digimon forms, away from the others of course.

Only it wasn't quite fighting. Not quite lovemaking either: Digimon had no real concept of sex, outside of personality roles. They didn't need to: most DigiEggs came from reincarnating Digimon. The closest equivalent, according to Bokomon, was when two Digimon used DNA Digivolution to combine and be reborn as one DigiEgg. Which was probably whatAncientGreymon and AncientGarurumon had been trying to do in his dreams (Thank you, Sorcerymon, for finally clearing up the true identities of the Spirits). And maybe that was what their Spirits were trying to get them to do now. Only it didn't work that way for humans…or did it? Here in the Digital World they were just data too, after all. But the idea of being fused with Takuya, permanently…

Then there was Duskmon. The Legendary Warrior of Darkness, that damn impossibility that contained a soul that looked just like Koji. Was it some kind of trick? Was he a mimic? A manifest of his own guilt and sin? A long-lost twin like every cheap movie ever?

Maybe I've been cloned? Koji wondered, as he stared up at the night sky. Everyone else was asleep, including Takuya…for now, anyway. Cloning wasn't totally out of the question: data could be copied easily, which was probably why there were groups of identical Digimon that both looked and acted the same. Most Digimon might be just clones of one original copy, actually.

Koji summoned a band of fractal code around his hand. Right now he was data, so…

Then he stared at his fractal code, even bringing it close to his face to make sure. No, it wasn't his eyes deceiving him. His fractal code had changed! When did that happen?

…More importantly, what did that mean?

IIIIII

One night Koji woke up feeling inside out. He looked at his hand: it seemed familiar and foreign at once. He was no longer a human contained with a digital frame, but a Digimon sealed into human form. He wasn't sure if his human spirit was having an out-of-body experience, or if he was locked deep within himself.

I am…Koji, he thought, as his body began to get up. It shouldn't have been that hard to think of his name, even if his head felt like it was stuffed full of static. Scents of earth flooded his nostrils, and the cold air scorched his lungs. A bizarre hunger permeated his body.

He didn't know where he was going, or what he needed. Time meant nothing. Thoughts slipped through his minds like slick eels, each escaping in moments. It was like his memories were on fast-forward, and someone else had the remote. Occasionally he felt alien emotions and contemplations, mostly consisting of What is this? or What does that mean? or Is this a kind of battle? or Is this a human function? There weren't any concrete words, but that was how the feelings translated.

What…thought Koji, or tried to think. An image of him and Takuya standing in an elevator flitted across his mind. Takuya had been talking, and Koji had been not-so-politely ignoring him. That was before the Digital World. That was before everything. Takuya…Where are you?

And suddenly Takuya was found, his (amazing) eyes staring at him like a curious rabbit. Koji's heart hammered like it was its own caged beast as he felt his body saunter forward. Memories of AncientGarurumon intertwined with his own: AncientGarurumon and AncientGreymon meeting as Rookie-level Strabimon and Flamon, AncientGarurumon and AncientGreymon fighting together, AncientGarurumon and AncientGreymon fighting each other, AncientGarurumon and AncientGreymon fighting alongside other Legendary Warriors, such as a rainbow-colored fae and a black-and-gold sphinx, AncientGarurumon and AncientGreymon fighting other Legendary Warriors, AncientGarurumon chewing on the black-and-gold sphinx thinking I will make you wolf, I will make you all wolf, unhappy AncientGreymon tackling AncientGarurumon off saying I will make you dragon, my wolf. Back and forth, I will make you wolf, I will make you dragon, I will make you wolf, I will make you dragon, I will make you wolf-

Stop…thought Koji with growing dread. Don't…you…I'm not you. Stop. He saw Takuya approaching him too, gaze still wide. Run…Run, you idiot! I'm not me! R…Ru…

"Run…" Takuya whispered, eyes full of terror, though he still came forth. Suddenly Koji understood that Takuya wasn't in control either. There was no one else here to interrupt their trances.

No…please…

What is humanity? Koji wasn't sure if it was him or the Spirit speaking. Everything in his mind was blurring together. The three moons above were so bright, just like the dragon boy's eyes. What makes a human not a Digimon? A human doesn't exist for fighting? Error. Fighting is existence. Existence for love? Love definition not known. Error. What is love?

…please…

Searching…a score of zero in some sports, a feeling of affection toward another, a strong liking of something, passionate attraction and desire, beloved, romantic affair, intercourse…equals DNA Digivolution? Error. Show us. Show us what love is. Show us what being human is. Is this another type of combat? Another type of evolution? We want to know what this love is.

Taku…ya…Ancient…Grey…

IIIIII

Koji and Takuya couldn't stand to even look at each other after that encounter. They could barely stand to be touched by others, much less one another. That was not how that type of thing was supposed to happen. Did the Spirits understand that, even now? Both swore to never use the Spirits again.

Then the next enemy came, and both decided that they still wanted to live after all.

IIIIII

Koji's life had become a cheap movie.

When Koji said he wanted a sibling, he had been thinking of a youngster he could teach and protect, or someone older he could hang out with or learn from. He had not been thinking of having an identical twin brother who was older by only a few minutes. He certainly hadn't expected to meet said twin here in the Digital World, under the malevolent influence of the corrupted Spirits of Darkness. Now both the Spirits and his newfound brother were purified and by the group's side.

His name was Koichi. He had the same black hair (though his was shorter) and the same blue gaze (though milder). Actually, almost everything was mild about Koichi, now that he wasn't manipulated by evil. Mild voice, mild smile, and mild opinions. And Koji didn't have a clue as to how to deal with him. They would be side by side for hours, with only a few words exchanged between them. Koji knew it was as much his fault as Koichi's. Still, this wasn't what Koji had in mind when it came to sibling interaction…

Awkwardness aside, brother issues were a welcome distraction from the other problems in Koji's life. Old enemies like Cherubimon had fallen, but new ones like the Royal Knights had risen up. New Spirit Evolutions had manifested in answer, and with them new complications.

As much as they needed it, Koji hated the new evolutions to MagnaGarurumon and EmperorGreymon. To become them, he and Takuya needed five sets of Spirits each. This meant that they had to borrow Spirits from the others. Not only did this leave all the fighting to Takuya and Koji, because the others couldn't battle without their Spirits, but now they had not just two but ten spirits at once vying for their psyche. Some days Koji could barely remember he was human, as past memories and desires flowed through him like transfused blood. There were a couple times where he couldn't remember his own name.

The knight's constant rampages and world-destruction had left little time for Koji and Takuya to see each other privately. Koji wasn't sure if that was good or bad. On one hand Koji did not want anything like that one encounter before the Cherubimon battle. On the other hand it would be nice to live for something other than battle, or at least have a battle that was for fun and not for their lives.

But no, it was best to keep that kind of thing suppressed. All they had to do was beat the knights, and then the world could be saved and they could go home. Home. It had an exotic taste on Koji's tongue. So did the word "normal". It would be so nice to be normal again, where he could play the guitar and properly bond with Koichi. Where he wouldn't have to worry about being killed by monsters, or becoming a monster, and no wonder his fractal code was changing when he was scanning those Spirits against his code all the damn time, and he was human and he wanted to stay that way dammit and shit he just wanted to go home-

But damn he couldn't say that. They had a world to save. Just a little more. He just had to last a little bit more. If nothing else, he had to get his brother home, right?

IIIIII

It took Koji a little while to notice. Koji blamed fatigue, and the never-ending chasing and combat that was everyone's lives now. But really, it was stupidity. Perhaps even a little bit of denial.

Of course he paid close attention to Koichi. He was his long-lost twin brother who had been mercilessly used by dark forces. He wanted to protect him from further trauma, and he wanted to get to know him. And it seemed Takuya was jealous of the extra attention Koichi was getting. Takuya always smiled, of course, but Koji caught the glimpses of venom in his eyes, or even the occasional flirty glance.

Koji shot warning glares back. Blasted Takuya. Couldn't he at least try to be straight?

Because Koji sure was. He was not going to have his life and desires dictated by digital phantoms. He was going to go home, and his human life would be better than ever because now he had a brother, a brother who had regained his soul despite everything the Digital World had tried to do to him. A brother who now wore darkness with grace. A brother who was now a lion, while Koji was now a wolf. (No he was human, human dammit-)

Even then he still didn't get it.

Koji was out on a run in Beast Spirit form. He told himself he was doing it to patrol the edges of the Primary Village. He knew that he really did it because he needed release. He hated giving in to the Spirits even slightly, but if this would keep him from cracking and shattering like a dropped statue-

Then Koichi was there. Why was Koichi there? He was galloping beside him in his own Beast form, the black-and-gold lion JagerLowemon. How could he wield his Beast form so effortlessly? Even in its purified state, the Spirit should be-

"Mind if I join you?" his brother asked, matching him stride for stride. Was he doing that on purpose? Koji watched his perfect synchronicity with muted fascination. So this was what it was like to have a twin, someone opposite yet equal. So unlike Takuya, who was just different. What co-relation did a wolf and a dragon have, anyway? Wolves and lions ruled the beasts, devouring all under sun and moon. They only had each other as rivals, but if they became one creature, if they become one, if they became-

Koji dug his claws into the soft soil and skidded to a halt. Oh no.

Koichi, noticing his brother's sudden stop, slowed more elegantly and turned around. "What is it? The knights?"

Koji couldn't speak. His throat was too tight, his fangs too firmly locked together. OhnononononononononoNO-

The tip of Koichi's tail twitched in curious irritation as he went unanswered. "Koji?" his soft voice asked with innocent concern, such a contrast to his mighty beastly form. The way Koichi carefully treaded toward him reminded Koji more of a tender kitten than a jungle king. "Koji, are you okay?"

Koji remained immobile as he watched his brother cautiously approach. An image of a black-and-gold sphinx became increasingly imposed upon the much smaller black-and-gold lion. Koji struggled to stay above all the alien remembrances of allies he had never met, enemies he had never fought, craving for powers that were never-

Koji snapped at Koichi, who had drawn all too close.

His brother lurched back in alarm. "K-Koji?"

"Leave!" Koji snarled, body in tremors, body roaring in hunger. "Go back to the others! Now!"

Koichi was clearly shaken himself, his head and ears lowered. "Why? What's going on?"

"Just go!" Koji screamed, before abruptly bolting away. He heard his brother calling, but it soon faded into the distance behind him. He hoped that Koichi wasn't following. Koichi could not be following him now.

He rushed around blindly, his legs carrying him faster than he had thought possible. He growled and barked and howled and rolled on the ground and snapped at the air. The sweet aroma of all the flowers was sickening. Ripping them out of the ground with his teeth and chewing on them did little to solve the problem, but it was nice to bite something andbury himself in the exposed soil.

He had excavated a hole several feet deep, his nose and mouth gratefully full of dirt and dust, when Takuya appeared near the edge of the self-made den.

"…What are you doing?" asked Takuya, bewildered. If Koji wasn't so distraught, he would have laughed at Takuya's stupid expression.

"Go away," said Koji, his lupine form brown with grime. He resumed his digging. Digging was much better than thinking right now.

"You trying to find the fractal code for this area?" asked Takuya. Koji didn't pause to look up at him, but he heard him slide down into the pit. There was silence as Koji continued to claw at the ground. "…Seriously, what's wrong? You got Koichi real worried, you know."

Koji paused. "…Don't want to talk about it. Go back." He went on raking at the ground. "I'll be back after a while."

"You two have a fight or something?" asked Takuya.

"I said I don't want to talk about it!" Koji snapped.

There were footsteps, and then a warm hand on Koji's shoulder. Koji turned to see a dirt-streaked Takuya beside him. "Koji, I know it's hard being a brother sometimes. I can't tell you how many times I've wanted Shinya to just go away and leave me alone. But he's family, and I love him. Just like I know you love your brother. So don't let little things get in between you guys, okay?" He gave a reassuring smile.

Koji gaped at Takuya. Then he began laughing bitterly, which came out as more of a rasping bark as KendoGarurumon. As he laughed he dedigivolved back to human form, still dirty, and on his hands and knees.

"Uh…Koji?" asked Takuya.

"If only that was my damn problem, a stupid sibling spat…But no, my Spirit loves everyone, or whatever the Digimon equivalent is. It loves them so much that it wants to devour them. Human, Digimon, male, female, children…brothers…"

Takuya's eyes widened. He opened his mouth, but then quickly closed it. His gaze turned elsewhere guiltily.

So you finally get it, Koji thought with a grim satisfaction. Koji's ill laughter threatened to give way to tears, as he hugged himself while staring at the dug-up ground. "It doesn't care. It wants to devour everyone, because that's what a Digimon does. That's how a Digimon lives, especially ancient ones like the Spirits. They just take everything and…And how can I protect Koichi this way? How can I be a good brother when I've got this thing inside me that just sees him as a source of power, that just wants to…"

And then the tears were leaking from his eyes, and suddenly Takuya held him close. He said nothing, but what could be said about any of this? And even though Koji knew that crying would only turn dirt into mud, it felt good to let the tears bleed onto Takuya's shoulder.

IIIIII

Everything was getting worse. Barely any of the Digital World was left to save. The knights kept defeating them and stealing fractal code no matter what they did. Koichi seemed to be getting more distant instead of closer, though he was kind regardless. Maybe he could sense how Koji's Spirit hungered for him. Or maybe he was trying to protect Koji from a similar fate of being consumed.

Koji suspected it was too late. It was too late for a lot of things.

"We're going to die here, aren't we?"

The morbid inquiry came not from Koji but Takuya. The brown-haired boy's head laid in Koji lap as Koji massaged his muscles. Both of were exhausted and sore from the constant battles. Though there was hardly anything left worth fighting over at this point…

"Way to stay positive," Koji answered dully.

Takuya let his head lean against Koji's stomach. "I know."

For a while neither said anything. Koji looked to the debris of the three moon, which floated aimlessly in the great void. If this kept up, not even fragments of this world would remain. Including them. What happened if a human died in the Digital World…? Was human data processed differently, or…

"Koji?" asked Takuya

"Yeah?" said Koji, glancing back down to him

"Where's home?" asked the brown-haired boy.

Koji raised an eyebrow at Takuya. "What do you mean? Where's the real world from here? I have no clue."

Takuya chuckled. "Yeah. Stupid question, huh?"

More silence. More wreckage-watching. More pondering on real and digital existence. Koji wondered if their parents missed them yet. Thanks to the apparent time difference, hundreds or thousands of years might pass here before they were considered missing in the real world.

He never got those flowers to his step-mom. She would think that he must hate her. Maybe they would think he was a runaway?…Well, in a way he was. And like most runaways, he got far over his head and now…

I really didn't know what I had, did I? thought Koji. But at least I got to meet my brother, and everyone else. Even these damn Spirits…Well, I wanted an adventure, didn't I?…Please, everyone, don't wait too long for me to come home, because…

"Hey Koji, if you could go back to the real world, no questions asked, would you?" Takuya asked.

"Right now?" asked Koji.

"Right now," repeated Takuya.

Koji thought about it briefly. "Honestly, if some magical Trailmon came or something, I'd push everyone else on it. You, Koichi, Zoe, JP, Tommy, maybe even the remaining Digimon. But I can't leave the Digital World like this. It's…It's my duty to try to set things right."

"Even if it kills you?" asked Takuya.

"Even if it kills me," said Koji

"And after that?" added Takuya.

Koji frowned. "After that? I'm not a Digimon. I'm going to stay dead."

Takuya smiled, as he reached up to brush some hair away from Koji's face. "Are you sure? Can you really say that, after everything?"

Koji flinched back at the fleeting touch, stopping his massage. This was still Takuya…wasn't it? The way that he echoed his wondering from earlier disturbed him. "…Well, the Primary Village is gone. I doubt that even Digimon can come back right now, much less one of us."

"…Guess you got a point," answered Takuya, lowering his hand. The other boy sighed, but the small grin didn't leave his face. "I had a dream once…or something like it, I dunno. I went on a weird Trailmon by myself, and went back to the real world. It hadn't changed a bit. But I had: I was a Digimon, like a Rookie form of Agunimon or something. The human me was still in the real world, about to go into the Digital World. I tried to stop him, and I almost did."

"Key word being almost, huh?" Koji replied.

"Yeah," Takuya answered, nodding. "But not because the human me was so stubborn. It was because, at the very end, I told him to go."

"Huh? Why?" asked Koji.

Takuya chuckled. "I didn't get it either. It wasn't until recently that I finally understood the reason."

"Which was…?" asked Koji.

Takuya continued to smile. "If you don't get it yet, you will." He rolled onto his stomach. "Do my back too."

Koji sighed. "You sure are needy today." He began massaging him again anyway.

"Aren't we all?" Takuya said tiredly.

IIIIII

It was all a frantic, despairing, victorious tangle of events that finally sent them all spiraling back to the real world. The many-tiered battle with Lucemon had nearly destroyed Koichi on many levels. The trauma of nearly losing his brother in the real world, and actually losing his digital self in the Digital World, had left Koji so afire with terror and anxiety that he barely registered the fact that he was back home. He was in the real world again, a place that had become almost mythical in his mind.

He was home…and the Spirits were gone. They had fully separated themselves from them during the final fight. No more foreign memories. No more strange dreams. No more bestial urges for power and domination. He was normal.

Or, he would be, once it all properly sunk in. When he didn't feel like a empty paper bag caught in the winds. But it was nice to have nothing to worry about, to just drift on the air currents. Koichi, despite everything, was alive. His family was coming together again. He had new friends that he knew he could count on for anything. He was Koji again.

He almost shuddered when he heard his dog howl at police sirens.

IIIIII

Koichi's recovery from his tumble down the stairs was slow, which could only be expected from such a fall. The whole family was ready to flock to his side at any moment, with Koji being the first among them. He knew he was being too anxious, but after barely dodging disaster in two worlds…Well, Koichi was happy, anyway, and not dead. That's all that mattered, and Koji owed Koichi over a decade's worth of sibling protection anyway. Though how both sets of parents kept mixing up their names was getting annoying.

Life trudged on. So did school. Koji couldn't believe he actually missed the place when he was in the Digital World. Well, it wasn't quite as bad as before, since Koichi was there as well, though his classmates were bewildered by the sudden appearance of the long-lost twin. And, of course, they were constantly mistaken for one another, despite having differing hairstyles and personalities. The other (ex)Legendary Warriors besides Tommy were there too.

…Actually, maybe that last bit made things worse, because Takuya was there. Takuya, who meandered down the school hallways, and everywhere else, like an abandoned mongrel. Takuya, who recently got kicked off the soccer team for being too aggressive. Takuya, who recently invited him to the park just before dusk hours, and it was just the two of them there, and Koji really should have known better-

"It's cold," murmured Takuya. The boy was cocooned in a leather coat and a long scarf shaded like fire. But it wasn't winter. It wasn't even fall yet. Yet here he was trying to nestle up next to him on the park bench…

"It's not that cold," Koji growled back, pushing him away. "Get a hold of yourself Takuya. The Spirits are gone. We're in the real world. We…you don't have to be like this anymore."

Takuya just smiled and shook his head. "Koji, we got translated into data in the Digital World, got reformatted whenever we digivolved, literally gotten the fractal code knocked out of us, and…all that other stuff we did. Then our Spirits suddenly ripped away from us, and then we got shoved back to the real world. Do you really think that, with everything we went through, that nothing changed?"

"Yeah, we went through a lot," Koji agreed. "But it's done. We're flesh-and-blood humans again, and you need to realize that. Takuya, it's time to move on."

Takuya stayed stubbornly silent, and Koji thought that the boy might try to either punch him or kiss him. But instead Takuya just sighed and rubbed the back of his head. "Man, you still don't get it. I thought you were, well, smart and stuff."

"What are you getting at?" Koji growled.

Takuya turned more serious. "You haven't felt…weird? I don't mean in a Wow-I'm-Normal-and-It's-Weird kind of way. More like a I'm-Not-a-Digimon-But-I-Still-Feel-Like-One kind of way, or a I'm-Here-But-Not-Really way or something. Noticing stuff you shouldn't? That kind of thing?"

"No," Koji said curtly.

"Does that actually mean yes?" asked Takuya with a smirk.

"No means no," answered Koji. He stomped past Takuya. "And get a grip. Everyone else is moving on, including me. Why aren't you?"

"…Your fractal code changed when you were in the Digital World." Takuya spoke with the tone of a fact, not a question.

Koji stopped, though he refused to look back at Takuya. The expression on Takuya's face was calm and certain. Koji doubted his own visage was as cool and collected.

"It changed a lot, didn't it?" asked Takuya. "Though it didn't change all at once, but bit by bit, right?"

Koji didn't answer. Instead he turned away and kept walking.

He heard a loud sigh from Takuya, who soon wandered off in another direction. Koji was surprised he backed down that easily. Perhaps he was trying to move on after all.

IIIIII

It crept upon him like rising water.

Koji kept falling asleep in class. It wasn't because he wasn't well-rested, or even because the subject was boring. He just had no energy. Initially Koji believed it was his body recovering from all the battles, but he only seemed to be getting more drowsy instead of less. Other times his mind drifted off so far he almost wondered if he was dreaming. But no one seemed to notice, especially with injured Koichi nearby. And really, Koichi needed the attention more than he did. He didn't even care if people called him by the wrong moniker. He responded almost as easily to the name Koichi as to Koji.

Still, some days he just felt so drained that he couldn't motivate himself to do anything. All he wanted to do was lay back and soak in the false silence of the world, letting the soft edges of static that lick at his subconscious. In a way, he soon realized, he never left the Digital World.

For the Digital World was everywhere. In every computer, in every electronic. It was in every whirling blender, grating television commercial, poppy radio song, shrieking alarm clock, and cellphone call. Especially cellphone calls. Every trace of electric interference and humming technology crooned how he could return whenever he wanted, leave this other dream-like place.

(But it wasn't a dream, he reminded himself. This was the real world, and he was real, really he was.)

And suddenly the trickle would become a sea, and Koji struggled not to be pulled under all the electric noise. But what place wasn't steeped in the Digital World by now? Piece by piece, nonstop, the Digital World absorbed new data. Like a living body it broke down all it swallowed, reconfigured it, and made it a part of itself. Kid's shows, government reports, statistics on whale migrations, yacht blueprints. Kids. It took them all and changed them to suit its own needs. It was digesting humanity and all of it desires, ingesting their very souls, one bite at a time.

(It'll all become part of the Digital World, staying the same yet not at all the same…just like me…What am I even doing here anymore?…No, this is home! This is-)

"Koji."

Koji looked up to see Takuya, his expression somber. They were in the depths of the park, the sun quickly sinking behind the horizon.

When did I even get here? Koji wondered groggily. What have I been doing all day…?

"Koji," Takuya repeated, coming closer. "You feel it too, don't you? The pull of the Digital World. You can't get away from it."

Koji nodded numbly. His body offered no resistance as Takuya pulled him to his chest. He wanted his warmth, his voice. Those were the only things that were keeping him tied to this sanity.

"The others should be alright," Takuya went on, resting his head on Koji's shoulder. "They weren't exposed to the Spirits as much as we were. But us…We've been Digimon too damn much. We're-"

"Shut up, you damn idiot," Koji growled. "We're not Legendary Warriors anymore. We're human. And I want to stay human. I'm not Lobomon or KendoGarurumon or any other Digimon! I'm Koichi!…I mean, Koji!"

"…Yeah, that Koichi gets all the attention, doesn't he?" Takuya replied, a cold edge to his voice. He embraced Koji tighter. "Meanwhile you're barely clinging to reality, but no one notices because they're too busy fussing over him."

"…He needs the attention," Koji answered quietly. "I'll be fine."

"You're not fine," Takuya said. "I know, because I'm not fine either. I'm here but…I don't feel like I'm here. I can't focus on anything. I always feel like I'm freezing. I feel…incomplete. No, I feel like my damn soul's been torn out."

"…Takuya," said Koji. "…If you're that eager to go back, go back on your own. My place is here."

"Don't you get it?" Takuya snapped, grabbing Koji's shoulders roughly. "I don't want to go back there! I want to be normal! I want to stay here, with you! I want you…I want…" His grip grew limp. "And yeah, this is what I want. Not Agunimon or BurningGreymon or anyone else. I, Takuya, love you, Koji, even if you're damn annoying sometimes."

The only thing more burning than the silence around them were those pleading basilisk…no, those pleading human eyes, a vortex of autumn colors and emotions. Koji couldn't look directly into those eyes anymore than he could have gazed unblinking at the sun.

Koji pulled away, eyes averted. "I…wish I understood myself as well as you do."

Takuya said nothing. Neither did Koji as he walked away. He was always walking away. Or maybe he was running in slow motion?

IIIIII

If only Koji knew himself. If only he knew what parts of him were human, Digimon, boy, warrior, friendship, lust, love, memory, imaginary. If only he never boarded that train. If only he had stayed in the Digital World. If only, if only…only…

Only he knew that the fires scourging Shibuya were not lightning strikes or cigarettes left lit. Only he knew that the one who howled at the moon and stars was not his dog. Hunger undefined wore both of them like a second skin.

He knew. They both knew.

IIIIII

Koichi knew too, in his own quiet way. Perhaps there was something to this twin telepathy thing after all.

"I wish you didn't have to go," Koichi said, as Koji was opening the door to the outside. "But…I won't stop you. You're not happy here anymore. I can tell. If there's anything I can do to help…"

Koji gazed to the bright day before him, almost too bright, as a breeze rolled by. "…Koichi, are you happy here? Are you glad to be back?"

"Yeah," Koichi replied. "I can't say I regret the Digital World, but…I feel no need to return. This is where I belong."

Koji smiled. "That's all I need to hear. Thanks."

"You…will come back, won't you?"

A pause. "Probably. But I won't be the same person anymore." Another pause. "Well…bye Koichi."

He stepped out, and reluctantly shut the door behind him. He tried to concentrate on the glorious weather, chirping birds and city smells as he departed. They seemed further away than ever.

IIIIII

They met at the train station where it all began. Koji, hair loose and long, wore a fur-trimmed coat and his token bandana around his neck. Takuya, with his mane of long brown hair (much like Agunimon's, Koji realized), still wore his old goggles, though the hat was gone. His leather jacket flapped like half-formed wings as a train swept by.

They said nothing to each other as they entered the old elevator. Koji could almost pretend it was the first time again, before they even knew each other's names. He wondered if Takuya was trying to do the same thing.

It didn't have to be here, of course. They could dive into the Digital World from anywhere, as the data network around them incessantly insisted. But this spot felt the most appropriate, a new beginning with a new track to follow.

"Just like old times, huh?" said Takuya, turned away from him. "I remember this is where we first met. Well, where I first tried to talk to you anyway. Not that it worked." He laughed.

"Yeah, because you were annoying," Koji replied, quietly watching the elevators numbers flash and fade like fireflies. "Still are. I guess you consider that a good memory then."

"Not really. It's just funny."

There was more silence.

"I wonder if anyone will remember us," said Takuya. "I mean, in digi-time it's probably been eons or something."

"Yeah," said Koji. "We're probably just myths to them by now. You know, like how the first appearance of the Legendary Warriors was ancient history by the time we got there."

"Uh-huh, yeah."

The elevator whirred away. Koji thought it was a bit noisier than the last time they had ridden it. Or maybe he didn't pay attention to its little creaks and squeaks back then. He had been about to go on a great adventure, after all.

"We're too dangerous here," Takuya continued. "In the real world, I mean. I didn't want to leave the others suddenly like this, but…"

They would have followed us and tried to stop us, maybe getting hurt because of it, Koji thought. His brother, now mostly recovered, flashed across his mind. Koichi…The last thing I want is for you to lose yourself again. For everyone to lose you again. To give you a chance, and everyone else a chance, I must…

Lights on the elevator lit up beyond the usual set of numbers. Koji felt the air electrify. How had he been so oblivious to this feeling before? Takuya too seemed to sense the shift.

They were going so they would protect everyone. They were going so they could become Legendary Warriors again, or perhaps reclaim what humanity they had left behind before. They were going because they were heroes to both the real and Digital World.

It was all lies.

"What'll we become?" asked Takuya, quietly.

"We'll become what we need to be," Koji answered, just as hushed.

The elevator door finally gave way, revealing ruins. What should have been a plain train station, albeit one that led to another world, was nothing but a tangle of concrete and binary. Electricity sparked between bent and fragmented rails. Parts of the wall were coated in rushing numbers, which spilled out onto the floor like rampant mice. Bricks and stone were meticulously molded into the shape of trees, right down to the veins in their brittle leaves.

"It's becoming part of the Digital World," said Takuya, amazed by the astonishing metamorphosis. He yelped when he accidentally stepped on an overcharged wire.

"You say that like it's news," answered Koji coolly. "The Digital World's getting bigger all the time. It shouldn't be too surprising that it's swallowing this area of all places." Yet he also stared at this encapsulated electrical spectacle. Was this going to happen to all of the real world eventually? The Digital World made real…or the real world reduced to simulation.

For a while both were wordless, backs turned to each other, as otherworldly energy cackled and snapped around them. Voices could be heard, but they were only corrupted songs and screams stolen from the media. Koji glanced to the elevator, and then hastily averted his eyes.

Takuya held up his hand and studied it. After several seconds, a small band of fractal code encircled his palm. He smirked.

"Let's get this over with," said Koji, watching his own fractal code materialize around his hand.

"Hey, don't be such a downer," said Takuya, turning to face Koji with a toothy grin. "We don't have to hold back anymore. This'll be fun! This'll be great!"

Koji also turned around, smirked, and nodded. "Yeah."

The fight itself was swift and sudden. Koji had the focus and discipline of martial arts, but Takuya had developed a wild brawl style during his long adventures. They punched and kicked and flung each other into ragged streams of electricity. They pushed and pulled and clawed and bit. They growled and screamed and roared and howled. Garbled broadcasts echoing from within the binary walls were the only actual words spoken.

Until Takuya tripped Koji…with a string of fractal code looping around his leg.

Koji hit the ground hard, as much stunned by the code's peculiar sensation as forced off balance. There was a flash of a little brown-haired boy stumbling around a soccer ball, and then reality returned. Koji got up, staring at the data loosely circling Takuya, the little boy swallowed by the dragon. Then he laughed.

"Seriously Takuya?" Koji asked. "You just attacked me with your own fractal code? You're insane."

Takuya only grinned. "We both are." He lunged.

Koji rolled away from the pounce. As he did so he summoned fractal code around his hand, letting it uncoil into a whip-like state. He aimed for Takuya's ankles, and now it was the dragon boy who was getting yanked to the ground. He shuddered, staring blankly at the ceiling for a few moments before clumsily trying to untangle himself from the code.

"Got you," said Koji. "Finally." He felt more than saw other lines of data materialize from his being and snake about. It all unraveled so easily. Was this what it felt like to digivolve? To really digivolve?

Takuya smirked despite the dazed look in his autumn eyes. "Oh yeah?"

Several lines of fractal code unfurled from Takuya's back like skeletal wings. In an instant they snapped forward and bound Koji by the arms and torso. He barely felt the fall as foreign memories barraged his brain.

"Looks like…" Takuya was saying, though Koji could barely make out the words in his mind's overwhelmed state. "Got you…will become…have to…"

Koji retaliated by allowing his own code lines to go wild. They wove around anything they could touch: pillars, train tracks, floating debris, and, of course, Takuya. His bewildered cries were enough to confirm that at least some had captured their intended target.

But it couldn't stop. The data rushed out of Koji like string wrenched from a spinning spool. No, it wasn't just his data: Takuya's own crazed fractal code was snarled up with it, the data ribbons scanning each other endlessly. The fractal code wrapped around and over everything, rapidly shutting out the outside. Like spider webs…no, like a cocoon, or an egg…

So many motions, colors, emotions running through him, occurences both there and not there. Memories…? A boy walking his dog. A boy running from a dog. A boy boarding a train. Wolves. Dragons. Humans, or something like them. Glowing. Pain. Numbness. Disintegrating. Fading. He was…Koji…wasn't he? Or was he…the other? Was he…please let him be…

…Human? What was a human? What was…he? Fear. Who was…? More fear. Where once there was far too much, now there was nothing at all. No colors, no memories, no words. Just wondering, and knowing that somewhere something should be, but no longer was. All that remained was a hollowness, a aimless hunger for…something. Someone?

Let go.

A voice. His own? Another's?

Let go, and let yourself become complete. Be new.

Be complete…be new…yes, that was why they were here. Two wholes torn asunder could join and become a new, better whole. Two ancients wishes would finally come true, and two fresher ones.

Yes, he wasn't alone. There was another being, somewhere in this sanitized void. Waiting. Knowing. Fearing. Yet ready, like he was. There was nothing else for them here.

He called the key phrase, and another called in unison.

"DNA Digivolution!"

IIIIII

There is an Digiegg on the railroad tracks. At least, the Digimon think it's a Digiegg.

Then cracks shoot across its surface like lightning.

IIIIII

And...an evil cliffy ending for an evil fic. Seriously, I felt it was best to leave it ambiguous. There are multiple evolutions a Digimon can have, after all.

So, what did you think of my first yaoi fic? What did you think of the concept/plot?