"There you are!" Sir Integra made her way across the foyer in three great strides, an angry expression on her face. The guffawing troupe at the door stopped, staring at her like deer caught in the headlights of an eighteen-wheeler on the freeway. "Do you have any idea what time it is?"

"Ahh," The Captain began, but she cut him off.

"It is 5:00 am, Captain Bernadotte! When I gave you leave to go for drinks with your men, I expected you to be back hours ago!" she declared, glowering at him with crossed arms. "And furthermore, the sun rises in less than a half-hour; you put Officer Victoria in danger, just because you were out carousing!" Pip blinked at her for a moment before turning slightly and elbowing the man nearest him, who was a fellow Frenchman.

"Le patronne est en colère," he announced in a loud whisper, pointing his thumb at the fuming heiress. The man nodded with a roar of laughter. Sir Integra's eyes narrowed even further and she dragged Seras inside, not paying any attention to the way the girl stumbled slightly, or how her blue eyes were even shinier than usual.

"You should be ashamed of yourselves," she spat. "Look at you all! Disheveled, reeking of booze and cigarettes, and..." she paused, her eyes widening as she stared down at their feet, "Officer Dernov is missing his left shoe!"

"He is?" the officer in question slurred, looking down at his own feet curiously. His left foot was indeed bare, showing off his big toe through the hole in his worn-out sock. "Oh! Fancy that," he chuckled, wiggling the exposed toe.

"You drank yourselves into a blissful ignorance that nearly killed one of my vampires, and you are all too drunk to care!" she raved. "And then you have the nerve to show back up to work!" The Geese stared blankly at her, taking in her anger, before looking at one another and laughing nervously.

"Are—are you angry with us?" one asked. "I feel like you're angry with us." He cowered when Sir Integra directed the full force of her glare onto him. "Well, we did come back to work!" he whined.

"You got a problem, lady?" another grunted, crossing his arms and gazing at her blearily, his eyes rolling as if he were trying to focus in on her. "Cause we don't gotta work for you, you know."

"And you're on the fast track to getting fired too, soldier," Sir Integra retorted caustically, unfazed by the mercenary's attitude.

"Aw!" Pip laughed loudly, waving his hands and moving closer, stumbling slightly on the foyer's throw rug. "Don't mind 'im!" he said, jerking his head towards the angrier man. "He's always," he paused to burp slightly, his hand covering his mouth. "Oh, excuse me. He's always the jokester. He doesn't know when to stop."

He peered at his boss, moving closer than was socially acceptable and forcing Integra to take a step backwards. "You know, if you took off your glasses and threw on some different clothes, I think you'd be trés séduisante," he said with all the honesty that inebriation brings. Although her glare didn't soften her cheeks took on a pinker tone, suggesting that though she didn't speak the language, she knew exactly what he meant.

"Go home," she ordered quietly, her lips pursed in a tight line. "Sleep it off and come back tomorrow." Pip shook his head solemnly.

"Not until I see the wager and get my two month's extra pay," he proclaimed, and crossed his arms stubbornly.

"What?" Sir Integra asked, confused. She heard giggling and half-turned to see Seras swaying over by the wall, both hands over her mouth. "Officer Victoria, do you have something to add?"

"Teehee!" she tittered, before addressing the Geese. "You got in trouble!" she said in a sing-song tone, pointing at Pip. Then, her face drained of all gaiety and looked almost sober. "You just wait," she said, a slight slur to her words as she licked her lips. "There's nothing—nothing between me and… and that other guy." She snapped her fingers, wracking her head. "You know, Alu-what's-his-name." She waved her hand at Integra. "He's the one that's gonna be paying me," she avowed.

"Alucard?" Sir Integra asked, now thoroughly baffled. Why would Alucard be paying Seras anything? He didn't make a salary. Seras laughed so hard she snorted.

"No, you silly goose!" she snickered. "The Captain!" she explained, like that was supposed to clear everything up. She turned, looking around the foyer with a strange, pensive quietness. "Where's he, anyway?"

"I'm here," Pip said, and she turned back around, rolling her eyes.

"Not you!" she shouted, her voice ringing in the large, empty space. She turned on her heel, nearly falling into an end table before walking with a swaying motion towards the stairs leading to the basement. "Master! Oh, Master!" she sang at the top of her lungs. "I wonder where he's at," she repeated to herself, though it was loud enough that everyone heard.

She had turned back to Integra when the floor dissolved into shadow and Alucard came up from the basement. The intoxicated Geese screamed as one and backed behind their employer.

"Holy hell!" one yelped in a falsetto. "Didja see that?!"

"He's a damn monster!" the others affirmed noisily.

"Shut up before he hears you, dumbasses!" Pip shouted over them. "Hehehe," he chuckled nervously, looking at Alucard. "Don't mind them; they're just being incompetent fools."

"Clearly," Alucard responded scathingly, looking at them over his glasses. "Police Girl, this racket is unacceptable," he told Seras, who didn't act like she even heard. She bit her lip and winked, trying to get across the room to where he stood. She tripped and flailed, Alucard catching her by the collar before she hit the floor.

"Whoopsie!" she laughed, popping back up and fluffing her hair like nothing had happened. She looked up at him, biting her lower lip and giving a rather unsteady wink. The Geese and Integra couldn't see his eyes behind his sunglasses, but up close Seras could see the flash of bewilderment that was quickly hidden in his gaze. "Hey," she drawled, punching his shoulder lightly. "Alucard, just the guy I was looking for!"

"What?!" he hissed, unable to conceal the raw astonishment in his voice at his fledgling's uncharacteristic behavior. She chuckled and crooked her finger, raising her eyebrows twice with another wink.

"Com'ere a minute," she ordered. When he didn't move, she waved her entire arm, throwing herself off-balance. "Get down here! I gotta say something!" she nearly shrieked. He watched her a moment longer before obligingly bending to her level. She grabbed his collar and jerked him the rest of the way. She pushed her cheek to his, her hand tight on his chin.

"Listen, don't tell Master," she slurred, holding up her other hand in a warning gesture. "But I kinda make this bet with Pip that I could kiss you and nothing happen, because you and I got nothing going on between us." She shook her head and peeked beneath his chin to see if the Captain had overheard. Satisfied that he hadn't, she pressed their cheeks together again.

"So don't read too deep into what I'm about to do," she whispered conspiratorially, her eyes both tipsy and serious. "I mean, you're handsome and all, but let's be real, okay?" She gave him a scorching glance. "If you want this," she said, motioning to her body, "you're gonna have to work pre-tty hard."

"A kiss," Alucard repeated coldly, one brow arching imperiously. "And you really think I'll—" Whatever he was going to say was muffled as she quickly turned around and pressed her lips to his for a full three seconds. Breaking away, she smiled and patted his cheek before turning and laughing confidently, waving a hand at the awed group.

"Ha-ha! See?" she said, pointing at Alucard, who had already straightened and ran this thumb lightly over his mouth, wiping the taste of alcohol from his lips with an indignant frown. "I told you all: there's nothing between us!" The Geese oohed and aahed, nudging their captain with large smiles. "Your turn, mon capitaine," Seras added triumphantly. The Captain snuck a glance at his employer, who had been watching Seras' antics with wide eyes. She looked back at him and, perhaps realizing what he was liable to do, backed away another step.

"If you even dare, Captain Bernadotte," she warned solemnly, "you will be thrown in the dungeons and released on charges of harassment." The man's face crumpled.

"B-b-but!" he protested feebly, inching forward. "Two month's pay! Two month's pay! I can't live on nothing!"

"Well, considering what I've seen here tonight, I think two months with no extra income would be quite beneficial to you," Integra replied coldly. "No money for alcohol and cigarettes means that you'll sober up; maybe now I can get some competent workers for a change." She turned to Seras. "For the record, Police Girl, you can expect a dock in pay as well, for even going along with such a foolhardy scheme."

"What!?" Seras shrieked, putting her hands on her hips and swaying where she stood. "That's not fair! I didn't do anything wrong!"

"We'll chalk it up to overindulgence and showing up to work inebriated," Integra answered smoothly. "Perhaps your new lover can let you borrow some money." Seras blinked in confusion before pointing questioningly to Alucard. Integra nodded and the Draculina sputtered incomprehensibly, eyeing him warily. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I have work to do. Alucard—do make sure that Agent Victoria manages to get into her coffin without falling down the basement stairs."

"As you wish, my master," the ancient vampire bowed and then picked Seras up by the collar, letting her dangle in the air a moment before disappearing in a swirl of shadow. The Geese looked at each other and then sighed as one, turning to finally obey their employer and head home. Their heads were beginning to pound and the fuzziness was slowly wearing off, predicating a much larger headache in the morning.

"Serves you right," Seras said imperiously. "Thinking you could embarrass me like that." She unloaded her gun on the target, watching the men moan and cover their ears with a sense of wicked glee. They all looked wearily at her, bags under their eyes and headaches pounding at their skulls.

"Guess you didn't know that vampires don't get hangovers."