Gotham's Best 7

The Choices We Make

Mary sat in Damian's room watching over the boy with great care. He had woken up three days ago and was still too weak to be left alone without supervision, or at least that was what Mary told herself. She had been watching over Damian for nearly three weeks, and her constant vigilance had rewarded her by being there for when he woke up. No one stayed by Damian's side longer than she did, but Bruce almost did give her a run for her money. He only left to patrol, and to make sure that Ra's was locked up for good this time. It seemed that the ancient knew to take his time with his escape because at the moment Batman wasn't even giving him room the breath. Mary watched Damian skim over all of the homework he had missed, something brought to him by his no longer secret girlfriend, Mariah Winters, who was still grieving her mother and craved Damian's attention. Mary could understand that, but after Damian's "car accident" She thought the girl would take a clue and give Damian the space he needed to heal.

"Are you ever going to get out of my face, Little Grayson?" Though the words were mean, they held no malice. Damian looked up from the work on his bed and stared at Mary with his eyebrow raised. "Didn't you have school today, or dance practice?" He asked. Mary noticed his empty water glass and moved to refill it.

"I have to stay and take care of you. Besides, it's just school. I'm supposed to be a little "out of commission" because of our supposed car accident, remember?" She told him putting his now full water glass back on the nightstand next to the bed. Damian frowned. He was never one to be the center of anyone's attention let alone Mary's. He must have really scared her the way she was currently catering to him. Not even his own father did that to him, and Damian had actually died once. It then donned on Damian that this was the first close call that she had actually experienced since she had become Starling. Sure Damian was used to them, he had been doing this job since he was eight, and even before that the League of Shadows had trained him to be the perfect killer. Close calls were apart of that. Damian wondered what kind of good luck Mary must have because he himself had his own father die right when he was starting to get to know him. Still, everyone had their cross to bear. Mary had come to this planet with no knowledge of what happened to her home planet and witnessed the death of her uncle. Damian at least knew that his mother was alive somewhere, and she was waiting to make her move against him. Mary didn't have that luxury. It had been years since she had come to Earth, and Mary hadn't heard a word about Tamaran. Damian refused to pity her. She wouldn't want that.

Besides, they all had something that scarred them. Damian didn't bring up Mary coddling him again. If it made her feel better to do this then he wasn't going to stop her.

"Maybe I will go to school tomorrow." Mary mused as she looked out the window. "It has been a while. Plus, I can go get your homework and stuff." Mary frowned. "Then that girl won't have to show up again tomorrow." Damian rolled his eyes. Mary was a talking about his girlfriend, Mariah Winters. She had shown up every day with all of Damian's school work begging to see him, of course, they never let the young girl see Damian, even after he had woken up. "She doesn't give up. I don't know how many times Alfred has to say that you aren't taking any visitors before she gets the hint."

"You don't like her," Damian stated with a raised eyebrow. He didn't understand Mary's need to antagonize the girl because honestly there was nothing special about Mariah Winters. At least nothing to make her this upset.

Mary shook her head. "I just don't know her. Of course, I was never given the chance too since you didn't tell anyone you had a girlfriend." Mary's voice held an accusatory tone as she stared Damian down.

"It doesn't matter anymore anyway," Damian stated. Mariah was nice, but she was normal. Something Damian could never be. He knew that now.

"So you are breaking up with her." Mary gathered from what Damian hadn't said. "That's why you haven't said anything about me and Alfred sending her away every day." Damian didn't agree or disagree with Mary's words. "Don't you think this is a little mean. Her mother just died, and now you're just going to dump her?" Mary asked.

Damian turned and glared at his partner, "Shut up, Mini Grayson. You don't even like her. It's none of your business anyway." Damian turned away too angry to look at her. Mary held her hands up in surrender.

"I'm just wondering what you're doing. You can avoid her now but you'll be going back to school soon meaning you can't avoid it forever."

"Oh and the mighty 12-year-old knows oh so much about relationships? Get real, Mary. You haven't even had your first crush yet. What do you know about this kind of stuff?" Damian taunted. Mary shrugged.

"Practically nothing, but I like to read, and I figured you don't want to end up like all the characters in relationships I read about," Mary answered honestly. When Damian turned away from her and refused to speak more she gathered that she had overstayed her welcome. Mary calmly got up and walked out of the room. She knew she hit a nerve, and she meant to. Mary knew that Damian knew that he had to break up with her. Ra's knew about her. Being with her wasn't safe. It was an evil trope that Mary constantly read about in her novels. She was so annoyed when Harry did it to Ginny in Harry Potter, but looking at it in real life. It was scary. Mariah wasn't like them. She couldn't take care of herself. She didn't even know about the other side of Damian that existed. Ignorance is a double-edged sword at times. It could only keep her safe for a short time. Mary pitied the girl. Mariah Winters would have been better off never knowing Damian. It was a harsh truth. Mary wondered how guilty Damian must feel. She knew what that was like. She often thought about how her mother would have reacted to her part in Ryand'r's death. Her mother loved her siblings, but Koriand'r held a special place in her heart for Ryand'r as he was the only family she had left before Mary was born, now she was alone on Tamaran. If Mary was being honest with herself she would say that she didn't like Mariah Winters because she reminded Mary a little too much of her true situation.

It was so easy to be the human, Mary Stella Grayson. To be the human girl that everyone saw, even her own family at times. It was easy to forget that she was really a half-alien princess of another planet who was forced to leave her home planet due to war. Being Mary Grayson made it easier to forget all that, and not deal with the pain. Mary could dive deep into the human persona she was given, and hide from her fears. Fears that Mariah Winters made very apparent. Mary hated to say it, but they were in a very similar situation. Both of them were alone in the sense of maternal family. There was something that Mariah Winters had that Mary longed for. Mariah Winters at least knew the fate of her mother. Mariah Winters would get closure. Mary knew she probably never would. It had been 4 years after all. If Koriand'r were coming to get her daughter she would have done so by know. Mary knew not to hold her breath. Her mother was probably dead after all this time, and it was best for her to move on, but that didn't stop her dreams from reminding her of all of her responsibility. If Koriand'r were truly gone, then she needed to return to Tamaran and free her people. People whom Mary wasn't even sure she knew anymore. People she wasn't even sure would want her to be their princess especially know that her powers were gone. Mary was scared. She didn't want to go back to those people. She wasn't sure if they would accept her as she was. That was one of the reasons she stopped asking Hal for updates on Tamaran and her mother.

The first reason was that she kept getting the same answer, that the guardians were working on it, and for a few months that held Mary over, but after that first year she wanted to know more. Mary wanted progress on the state of her homeworld. As much as she loved her family on Earth, she longed for Tamaran and wished to return as soon as she could to help her mother rebuild. She abandoned her people and needed to go back to them, but after so long…. They probably didn't even remember their queen had a daughter let alone acknowledge her as the crown princess. Mary wasn't expecting much of anything anymore.

Mary sighed as she walked back to her room at the manor. Like the one at the loft, it was decorated though not by her. Bruce hired a designer for the room, and she found it very similar to what her room would have been like if she were still on Tamaran. The bed was round and around a curtain of shining rhinestones that reminded Mary of the stars in space. She missed space, just like she missed flying, and everything else about being Tamaranean, but she wasn't Tamranean anymore was she? Everything that had made her Tamaranean had been taken from her, Her mother, Her uncle, her people, her planet, and her powers. She had nothing tying her to the planet somewhere among the stars in the sky above. Mar'i, Princess of Tamaran almost didn't exist in the picture that Mary stared at in the mirror. All Mary saw was a human, and she didn't mind the sight of it.

On her bed, Hal the Cat meowed softly. Since she was staying at the manor her father brought his daughter's cat to the place she had recently taken up residence. Hal was pretty much confined to Mary's room though, as Alfred(the cat) and he did not get along. He hated it, but Mary needed to be at the manor taking care of Damian. Her partner was a little bit higher on her priorities than her cat. Hal climbed up onto Mary's lap as she sat down and checked her phone. She noticed countless and countless messages from Kevin, and Madame Michelle concerning her missing her competition(again) and her practices. Mary didn't bother reading the messages or listening to the voicemails. Kevin and Madame Michelle were patient with her since they thought that Bruce's schedule and fame had to do with her missing so much, but eventually, even their patience would run out. Mary thought back to Damian's birthday right before they had found Mrs. Winters' body. She had made a promise that she knew she couldn't keep. While she fully intended to be there she knew that if anything major happened(which something did) then she couldn't go. She had a responsibility to the city of Gotham and her family. Bruce had always told them that they couldn't take days off as lives would be lost. She never released how true that statement was until she watched Damian wither away in bed for three weeks. Mary wasn't sure her heart could take another scare like that but knew that it was inevitable. Mary looked at her phone's background a picture of her and Kevin laughing in the dance studio and sighed. She loved to dance, just as much as she loved being Starling, but she wasn't sure if she could do both, not anymore.

If her father had his way then he would tell her to hang up her cape and continue dancing. That it would be better and safer for her in the long run. That she could go so many places with her dancing skills. Mary loved the idea of going away to a far away dance school to hone her craft and learn from the best. The idea of it almost made her cry with joy, but she knew she knew that it would be abandoning her family, even if they wanted her to go. She remembered how Ryand'r smiled as she took off into space, thanking X'hal that she had gotten away, and Mary knew she couldn't abandon anyone else like that again, but in a way, she was abandoning Kevin and the dance troupe too.

"Hal, I don't know what to do." She told the cat confidential. Hal, however, had no solutions to her problem he only stared up at her with his green eyes and rubbed his head against her hand comforting her. No matter what she chose at least Hal wouldn't be mad at her. She didn't want to think about Damian's reaction or Jason's. They were the ones who fought for her to be Starling and for her to just throw it all away would be like spitting in their faces. Mary realized that she didn't like making such permanent choices, she wished someone would choose for her so she could avoid the blame for whatever the outcome was. Mary honestly just wanted to sleep and forget about all of her troubles. And so she did leave the world of consciousness for one that held no worries.

Mary wished she hadn't told Damian that she was going to school today. She didn't want to be here, one reason was that Damian still needed a lot of help and the other reason is that she was avoiding her friends especially Kevin. She had promised all of them that she was going to be at the dance competition and of course fate made it so that she missed it. Of course, to them, there was a car accident that she was in that put Damian in a coma and herself out of commission for a few days with injuries(to allow her hair to grow back to its original length). To her friends, she had been hurt, but in actuality, she was fine and taking care of Damian at the manor. She couldn't tell them another lie, that next competition she was going to be there, because Mary realized she wasn't sure if that were true. Tomorrow Bruce could find a case or Helena, or Barbara could get kidnapped, or maybe Tim would get shot by someone and need their help. Too many things like that happened to her family too often for her to promise her free time away. Mary knew she didn't really have any free time. The time in-between the life-threatening incidents defined her life and that scared her more than any horror movie ever could.

Mary begged Alfred to take her to school late as she only shared first period this semester with Kevin. She wouldn't have to face him until lunch if she missed first period. Alfred complied thinking that she wished to be around for when Damian woke up. Which she did, but that wasn't her reasoning. Mary gets to school a little after the start of her second period and makes it to her class without seeing any of her friends. She breathes a sigh of relief as her teacher inquires about her health after the car crash, and gives her ample time to make up any test or quizzes she may have missed before returning to teaching the rest of class. If Mary has her way the rest of the day she wouldn't have to face Kevin and see his disappointment.

Of course, lunch came too soon. Mary found herself wincing at the shrill ring of the bell, and dreading the upcoming tongue-lashing that her friends were going to give her. Sherrie and Carrie probably wouldn't even talk to her and Braxton couldn't defend her this time, but above all else, Mary was dreading Kevin's disappointment. She had let him down again when she promised not to, but Mary held her head high as she walked into the lunch room grabbed her food, and sat down at her usual table. No one was at the table yet, something that Mary was secretly thankful for, and she discreetly watched for her friends to come up. It was then that Mary spotted Sherrie and Carrie coming up with Braxton behind them. Mary closed her eyes anticipating the screams that she was going to get for letting them down for the umpteenth time, and held her breathe in order to stop her tears. Instead, Mary was greeted with a hug. Mary opened her eyes at the sensation and saw Sheryl holding her tightly.

"Thank god, you're alright!" Sherrie said. "We heard about the crash, and about Damian. We were so worried. We even tried to call the Wayne Manor for an update on you, but the butler wasn't giving out any answers." Sherrie told her quickly almost as if she were relieved to see Mary today.

"Yeah, you should have called us and told us that you got into a car accident on the way to the airport." Carrie scolded. "We had to hear about it on the news. How do you think we felt knowing that while we danced on stage one of us was in the hospital?"

"Yeah, you had us worried, Mary." Braxton cut in. Mary looked around and noticed that Kevin wasn't around. This was odd seeing as the four of them shared that class while Mary wasn't able to take due to testing out of that particular foreign language. Mary put on her best smile and tried to ease her friend's worries while trying not think of all her lies piling up. They sat down with promises of making sure she made it to the next competition safe and sound. Mary laughed at their enthusiasm and Braxton's plan to employ a whole squadron of men to make sure Mary arrived at her next competition, but that's when she saw him.

"Mary!" Kevin called out with a wave gaining all of their friend's attention, but it wasn't Kevin that held Mary's attention, but the man behind him. He stood tall about her grandfather's age with a brown bomber jacket on. Mary knew that brown hair and green eyes.

"Hal?" Mary whispered as she stood up to meet the two halfway. "Kevin, what are you doing with Hal?" She asked when she got to him. Mary noticed Kevin's frown when she spoke to him, and figured that she wasn't quite forgiven yet, even with her so-called injuries.

"I found Mr. Jordan at the office while I went to get some pain medicine." He said holding up a zip-lock bag with two Ibuprofen in it. Mary's eyes widened as she looked at him for injuries and found his ankle wrapped in a gauze. "It's just bruised." He said waving off her worried expression. "Anyway he said he was checking you out of school and wanted to get you personally from class. I just happened to be there to show him the way." Kevin explained.

"Yeah, It was nice of him. Thanks, kid." Hal commented reaching for Mary and pulling her into a big hug. "How ya been, Princess?" Mary skilled at him. She hadn't seen Hal in over a year. He's been stationed off-world trying to help with the situation with the Gordanians, last Mary had checked they hadn't made much progress and still couldn't get word on the state of the Tamranean queen.

"I'm fine," Mary replied. She really couldn't go into detail about everything she wanted to ask Hal here at school.

"That's great. Why don't you grab your stuff and we head on out?" He asked her. Mary nodded and returned to the lunch table she was about to sit at and grabbed her things.

"Mary, who is that?" Asked Sheryl. "That's not one of your uncles or your aunts?" She said staring at the stranger who was chatting with one of the teachers now.

"Umm," Mary stumbled trying to think of a way to explain her relationship to Hal. Saying that he escorted her to earth for interplanetary political asylum was a bit much. So Mary went with the next best thing. "He's a friend of my grandfather's," Mary said her eyes sliding back to Hal who looked back up at her with a smile. "He's a pilot from Ferris Air that we know." That seemed to be enough for her friends as they all nodded in understanding. "He's like another uncle I guess you could say. We're close."

"Well, Have a good lunch then, Mary." Carrie waved goodbye along with the others. Kevin didn't really say anything. Mary figured he didn't want to speak to her right now.

"Okay, Goodbye." She picked up her bag and walked out meeting Hal at the door. She sent one final look back to the table and noticed Kevin smiling at laughing with their friends. It made her heart hurt a little heart knowing that she wasn't allowed that smile today.

Outside the academy, Mary noticed that Hal's car was much nicer than something he could afford. "Who are you borrowing this from?" She asked. Rolls Royce was a favorite of his, but Mary knew he couldn't afford it, especially since his current job off world doesn't pay.

"Hey, I'll have you know that it's mine," Hal said slightly offended. Mary raised an eyebrow knowing that it was probably a gift from her grandfather. Bruce always was extravagant with his gifts, considering the jewel-encrusted smartphone in her pocket. Also, Hal's birthday passed when he was off-world, Mary figured the gift was for that. Mary got into the passenger side of Hal's new car and listened to Hal talk about his various adventures off world. She noticed he didn't really talk about Tamaran or mention anything about her mother. Which meant that there was no progress on that front. Still hearing about Hal trapezing around Space made her smile with nostalgia. As a child, she traveled around with her mother through space.

They pulled up to a small burger restaurant in the middle of downtown. It was a place that many people on Mary's side of town wouldn't know about. Steph was from this side of town though as was Jason, but that didn't mean that they came to this side often for anything other than work. This was the first place Hal brought her to taste Earth food. He thought she needed the most American food there was. She liked it but thought the food was greasy compared to the food on Tamaran. Though when she came down to earth she couldn't get enough of it, so excited to taste something different then the cuisine she was used now. Now Mary would give up an arm just to smell Tamaranean food.

Hal ordered for the both of them, he remembered what she liked at this restaurant even though she did not. Not that he could blame her, it was so many years ago. She was so young back then, Mary felt like she was almost not the same person that sat chatting Hal's ear off here years ago.

"Okay, so what's up with you?" Hal asked he sat down with their two trays of food. "You've been so quiet. The little princess I knew would have told me everything in the first five minutes." Mary looked down at her food.

"Yeah, well, maybe Gotham's taking the princess out of me..." Mary said picking up a single fry and placing it in her mouth. It tasted the same way as it did 4 years ago.

"Yeah well, this city has a way of taking the light out of people, especially when you do what we do." Mary looked up so fast that she almost hurt her neck. Hal smirked at her as if he knew every single thing.

"Of course, you know." Mary sighed as she took a bite out of the burger. She was probably in files somewhere or maybe one of the other founding members had told him, hell Bruce probably did it or even her own father. She shouldn't be so surprised that he knew, just that he was a token of her old life, one that she didn't often connect with the one she currently had. "How long have you known about Starling?" Mary asked, unsure how to word it.

"For a while, I haven't been on Earth for a while but I did a few years back come down for about a day or two, and just happened to run into your father. " Hal explained. "He seemed worried about you because I believe you had just been injured in a fight with Two-Face." Mary winced at the memory. Not her brightest moment, but it made her a little more cautious something that every hero needed especially newer ones like herself.

"Yeah, well, I'm fine now. That was a while back." Mary pushed her straw further into her soft drink not offering anymore comment on her first encounter with Two-Face when she and Damian first teamed up. Mary wasn't really in the mood to chat. As much as she loved seeing Hal again, right now her mind drifted towards her partner still at home recuperating.

"Aww Princess, I know you're worried, and I know how you feel, but you've got to not let it bring you down like this." Mary looked up slowly again at Hal, her soda no longer as interesting as it was seconds earlier. Of course, he knew what happened with Ra's too. Ra's was a league level villain and Robin had almost been killed. Mary wouldn't be surprised if the whole entire Justice League knew. They probably guessed on Bruce's foul temper lately alone, not that Mary's had been much better. Though unlike her adopted grandfather she didn't burn with righteous fury taking out any weak obstacle in her way, or like her father simmer at volcanic temperatures just under the surface ready to erupt at any little thing. Mary wilted. As beautiful and strong of a flower as she was, thorns and all, if plucked and placed outside of her natural setting would cause a normally vibrant girl to droop and wither. Without roots, no matter how much care a flower is given it will die eventually.

Hal studied the melancholic girl before him. It was more than just Damian on the girl's mind, not that he could blame her. She had too many things to worry about. He hated seeing a child look like this. Her eyes looked far older than when he left her in the care of her paternal family. Hal looks at the girl years later and wonders if he made the right choice bringing her to her family, making her life this complicated mess that it is. He wonders if he should have left her with Carol on Zamaron. There surrounded by people who could easily understand her, and giving a life a little bit closer to what a child should be going through. Hal looked at Mary and knew that he should have seen this coming. All of those kids connected to Bruce had this look in their eyes. A look that made them seem less like kids and more like weary soldiers. Hal sees the young girl before him and blames himself. He can't take back the past, he can only try now to limit the damage.

"Listen, Mar'i, you can talk to me," Hal tells the young girl. She looks up confused and unsure. "I know there are certain things that you can't tell Bruce, or your dad, or Damian, but you can tell me anything. Nothing you say here to me will ever get back to them. I swear" Hal Promises.

Mary frowns, still unsure if she can trust the man's words. He was after all good friends with her grandfather and her father, but this was also her savior. Someone she trusted with her life. Hal was her first friend, and Mary could never forget that. Mary owed everything to this man, and now he was asking for her to confide in him. She had never done that before. Mary had a hard time really opening up to her own family, and as much as she loved Hal he was the same as them. He would judge her, and scold her for her thoughts. Mary looked at his eyes and only saw understanding and compassion. Mary wondered what he could see on her right now. She knew that she had been a little…Off since Damian's birthday. Still, she was no pity in his eyes, only the longing to know and understand. Back on Tamaran her mother always said to her that a true friend is someone who you can share your pain with. Her mother had told her that person had been a woman named Donna here on Earth, If someone asked Mary who it was, she would hesitate. There are many things in her mind that she can not share with those closest to her. She fears to hurt them with her true thoughts, she fears their pity and their disapproval. Damian while closer to her than the others is in the same boat. He like his father expects so much from all those around him, that it makes Mary want to be perfect for him. She strives to reach his level. Mary wonders if fate makes her the Icarus to her Damian's sun. Mary wonders when She will come crashing back down to Earth.

"You won't tell my father, or Bruce or any of the others anything?" Mary asks still unsure if it's alright to tell Hal anything, but if he would never lie to her. So she would ask him just to be sure.

"I won't. I promise." He says with a nod of his head. That is all Mary needs to release the floodgates and tell him everything. Mary tells him about her problems with how her father used Damian as bait to catch Ra's, She tells him about Alicia Royal and the missing kids that are her responsibility. She tells him about how she worries about Damian even more now, and about how she feels as if her life is being pulled apart by trying to be Starling and trying to be a normal girl. She tells him how much she misses Tamaran and her mother, and her fears about showing that to her father. Hal is silent through it all. Mary isn't sure of how much of it he already knew, or not, but she didn't care. She had no one whom she could confide into like this, and honestly, it felt good to speak to someone for what seemed like forever. When she's finished Mary's eyes burn threatening to release tears. She doesn't want to cry. She's tired of crying. She only wants someway to fix all of this. She only wants answers.

"I'm so tired, Hal." She tells him. "I don't know what to do." She finally admits to someone. She feels the weight of all these problems on her shoulders and she knows that she is slowly crumbling under their weight, and she doesn't know how to stop it from happening. Hal sighs and brushed his hair back with his right hand. He wasn't sure what he was expecting, but this was almost too much. No child should have to deal with all of this.

"Mar'i, I understand that you feel like the world crumbling around you, but it isn't," Hal told her trying to think of what to say to the clearly distraught child.

"I feel like I'm being torn apart in two. I have so many things to keep up with, Dance, school, Starling, my friends, and my family. I don't know how Bruce or my dad, or any of the others do it! I keep trying to find a way to keep balance, but every time I try something always goes wrong and I let someone down."

Hal sighed knowing that really this should have been a conversation that girl should be having with her father, but he empathized with her. She was afraid to show her father how much she was falling apart. Hal had heard from Bruce that Dick was against Mary being a hero at first, and honestly, Hal agreed with Dick. He would have never let his child be a Lantern, he would have done everything to make sure they wouldn't have to be, but he also remembered being young and understanding the pressure that comes with being surrounded by people who are extraordinary, while being normal. Being brought down to normal, must have been really had on her, and only wanted to make her prove herself to her new family even more.

"Mar'i, I wish I had answers for you," Hal said sympathetically and honestly. He honestly wished he would wave his hands and all her problems would go away, but he couldn't. So he settled on teaching. Teaching her to cope, teaching her to handle things, teaching her to be an adult. God, he shouldn't have to teach this girl how to be an adult. She should be worried about better things like school and boys, not the fact that she failed to stop the kidnapping and enslavement of multiple children, or the fact that someone in her family just woke up from coma, or the fact that tonight she would save the city all over again, but she wanted to be here. Mary wanted to be this hero, the hero that her mother was when she was on earth, even without powers. She could have easily lived a cushy life but she chose this path. Hal felt both pity and pride for this child.

"I hate to tell you this, but you have got to prioritize, Mar'i ." Mary looked up at the first real advice Hal had given to her all day. "You gotta make a choice, and I know this is hard. You want to keep both of your lives. The one where you're a hero and you save lives and people everywhere know your name and the one where people don't get hurt and you aren't risking your life, and you can relax. Many of us heroes have tried it. Some still are trying to make the double life work, but you got to make your priorities straight. Which is more important to you? And, Mar'i, if it's the life of Mary Grayson no one is going to blame you, but you've got to choose. Notice how every one of your family members and your family-friends knows and is involved with our lifestyle. Bruce does that on purpose because he has come to realize that he can't do be both Batman and Bruce Wayne. You must realize that when you try to do both you end up disappointing people on both sides."

Mary sighed. She was inclined to agree with Hal. She hadn't really been there for her dance team. It wasn't fair to them because really she had made her choice a long time ago, she was just pretending like she hadn't. She was being selfish, trying to be two people at once, and now the cracks are starting to show, but she loved being Mary, but was the Mary her friends knew really her? Mary wasn't sure.

The wind blew harshly making Damian pull on his raincoat. April Showers, not that Gotham ever needed an excuse to rain. Damian figured that Alfred was probably worried sick about him right now. Honestly, Damian wasn't feeling 100 percent. He wouldn't be surprised if he was off of patrol for the next week. Damian frowned, Mary would be out on her own then, it wasn't an idea he quite liked. After this, he would take it easy for real, and maybe Leslie would let him off the hook.

The creaking sound of the school gate being opened caused Damian to look up to see Mariah Winters walking towards him. He took notice of her puffy red eyes, she must have been crying. Damian knew one never really got over the loss of a parent.

"Damian, What are you doing here? Your butler said that you were still bedridden. Are you okay?" She asked him deep brown eyes filled with worry. It was those eyes what made Damian agree to date her in the first place.

"I needed to talk to you, Mariah," Damian said seriously.

Mariah chuckled awkwardly sensing the tension coming from her boyfriend. "I figured that when you texted me to meet you outside of the gate. What is it?" She asked, looking up at him in the eyes. Damian felt his breath hitch. he couldn't do this to her, not after she had just buried her mother. He couldn't take another thing away from her. "If it's something that can wait, Damian, curfew is about to start and I have to be back in my dorm room." Though she looked the same, Damian could see the toll her mother's death had taken on her. Her father was long gone and now her mother too. Damian figured her grandparents would probably keep custody of her. He wouldn't be surprised or blame her if she left school soon. He used to revel in her innocence. He used to love her carefree laugh. He had taken that away from her now. The thought made him sick, but if he didn't do this, Damian was sure he would be burying her next. Ra's would be back. He always came back. Shadows never die. Damian knew better.

Damian reached into his coat pocket and pulled out an envelope. He quietly handed it to her. Mariah took the envelope with a confused face before slowly opening finding a check inside of it.

"Damian, this isn't necessary, your father paid for my mother's funeral and has already offered to keep paying my tuition here. Which I'm grateful for, but really I can't keep taking handouts from you and Mr. Wayne. People are going to talk…" She said with a frown handing the check back to Damian who openly refused to take it from her hands.

"You have to keep it!" Damian said seriously and more panicked then he would have liked. He had never done this before most girls weren't like Mariah. They all wanted to go out and live the glamorous life of dating a Wayne. When they found out he couldn't do those things they usually left on their own. Mariah was always just content sitting with Damian in the art room. He didn't know where to start but he knew what needed to be done.

"Invest it, put it in an account that will grow. I don't care, but I can't take it back. " Damian amended. He sighed, he wished she wasn't so vulnerable right now, he wishes he could really date her and get to know her beyond school. "Please understand I feel very strongly about you, and that's why I have to end this. The money is because I can't take care of you personally anymore, not that I don't want too it's just that…." Damian trailed having no idea how to tell her he was indirectly responsible for the current horrible state of her life. "In the long run because of who I am it isn't safe for you to be with me. I've caused you enough grief as it is."

Damian saw the tears fall slowly one by one. He was ripping out her heart for the third time. Mariah seemed to not let her grief show past that instead, she took her hands, wiping the wetness from her face and looking up at Damian with a smile.

"Then I really can't accept this." She said slowly slipping the check into his pock. "It's funny, isn't it? My mother dies, I get attacked by assassins, your car accident and now you break up with me. I guess April just isn't my month." Damien would have laughed at the macabre humor, but found in this circumstance he couldn't. He was genuinely sorry a feeling Damian can say he has not felt many times. He wished he could stay with Mariah let the relationship naturally run its course learn about her faults her merits, but he had done enough. "Can we still be friends?' Mariah asked gently. Damian shook his head yes before he could answer truthfully. They could never really be friends. Damian couldn't really have friends outside of the work he did. He would always watch out for her from afar, but he knew that he could never be the shoulder she leaned on. He could never really be what she defined as a friend, but he couldn't break her heart even more. Soon, she wouldn't even consider him a friend. And that would be for the best.

"Goodbye, Mariah," Damian said to her looking at her one last time. Forging the way she is now in his memory, He had to remember what he did, He had to remember his sins. They didn't begin with her, but she reminded him of his place, and She was his greatest sin. He turned from her walking back down the sidewalk back home as the rain began to pour down harder and harder.

It seemed the rain always came when Damian learned his lesson.

"You gave Alfred quite a fright when he saw you gone from your bed," Mary said as Damian looked up at her outside of the gate going to their home. Damian noticed her standing outside in a very fashionable raincoat and boats holding a bright colored flowered umbrella the contrasted to the gloom setting around her. She must have been waiting on him though Damian wasn't sure for how long. "I'm assuming you left to care of things." She said. Mary knew him well, She always did. "I'm sorry." She said handing him an umbrella despite the fact that Damian couldn't get any more soaked then he was now. "I'm sure given the chance you guys would have had a great relationship, I'm sure my dad, Bruce, and everyone would have loved her." Damian snorted. It was no secret that Mary did not approve of his relationship with Mariah, but he could tell she meant her words. Though they meant very little now.

"You know, " Damian said, "She's the only girl I have ever pursued. She's was different from all the girls that followed me around the school. She only ever had an eye for her art, and her art was always more beautiful than mine. I was jealous of her talent at first, but…" Damian drifted off. He found for the first time it hurt to talk about something. He never thought he'd see the day a girl would leave him speechless.

" I get it," Mary said. She didn't need him to finish. She understood. "I quit dance today," Mary said making Damian look up at her in surprise. "Madame was sad to see me go, but I can't keep playing the fence." Damian gave Mary an understanding but sad look. He knew she loved to dance, She was always dancing on their patrols throwing some dance moves in with her fighting, practice her form on long stakeouts, but she was right she couldn't keep up being Starling and competing. This was for the best.

"You'll have to keep dancing some way, it's good to have things like that. Things you enjoy doing for the sake of doing them." Damian said, not really sure how to comfort the girl. Mary shook her head.

"I still work at the Gym part-time. I help choreograph a lot of the routines there so it's not like I'm not really dancing anymore…" She said, but it wasn't the same. They both knew that. Mary took a deep breath before grabbing Damian's hand and pushing open the gate. "Let's go inside, It's cold out here." Without another word, the two walked back into Wayne manor neither showing how they mourned a life that could never be theirs.

~Word Count:7,738 ~

I know, I know. "Bad Miyu! You haven't updated in a year! Bad Bad Miyu!" I know I know, and I'm so sorry for the long update time and then only to give you such a short chapter, but for This breather was needed. Anyway, in the past year, I've been in University as you all know and that comes first so that one reason I haven't been writing. I've also had two jobs and got cast in a musical so I have been struggling with a lot of things especially on the mental health side of things. Writing is hard when all you wanna do is lie in bed. You lose all your will to do anything, and that's been a real struggle for me, but I'm working on it.

As for this chapter it was always planned to be a short breather. I wanted it actually to be shorter then this around 5k words, but I'm a little over 2k off so I think I did a pretty good job of staying about where I like to be. usually, I'm a whole 5k words off my original target, but this is fine. I have a big plan for next chapter and a lot of things have been happening so I wanted the last chapter to digest a little here even though most of you don't need it because you've had a year to digest it, but I was halfway done writing it about 2 months after the last chapter came out and stopped there.

I feel for Damian, my precious boy, this chapter. He's one of my favorite Robins if not my favorite though they all have a special place in my heart. Mary struggles this chapter too, have been a topic many of you have brought up before and I was glad to touch upon it more. This was a very character driven chapter about dealing with what your life throws at, and Mary and Damian are honestly taking it like champs. Their conversation at the end was supposed to be longer, but I felt it didn't need so many words. They don't have to explain anything to each other. They already know. next chapter will be a real game changer and I hope I haven't lost all of you with the long wait. I'll try not to make it that long again, and I hope to see you again!

Next Chapter: The Initiate

~Love, Miyu K.

Special Thanks to all those who reviewed the last posting. TheOkWriter, 21 is awesome, Clee2440, Nightwing0126, llUnholyll, and two guest reviewers, thank you so much, and you guys always made me write even a little which helped.

Special shoutout to 21 is awesome! You make me want to write, and you've been here since pretty much the beginning. I always look forward to your reviews which are filled with wonderful things, and I hope you enjoyed this chapter.

And Also Nightwing0126, Please continue to give me critiques I love them! A lot of the time I don't get many reviews like that, so your reviews brought a great smile to my face and help me become a better writer.

Thanks so much to the both of you!