Author's note: Spinoff of Case No.? To Silence a Thinker. I tried to get their reactions right, but nevertheless, reviews would be good.

Case No.1: Al's Conversations

Alfendi has no choice but to engage in conversations with himself at night after hours of work. Placid just decides to humor him.

7:00 pm– Prologue

"Four years on, and still it smarts," Alfendi drawled, rubbing his head slowly with his long fingers as he attempted to ease the increasing pain. Sighing in exasperation, he pressed his forehead on the cool surface of the glass window in his office, hearing the harsh pattering of the rain and the soft thunder at the distance. He hated how the rhythmic tap dance of H20 still relaxes him.

"The heavens opened that night, and the rain sheeted down," he gritted. He exhaled sharply, turning his almost invisible reflection into mist. "That fateful night when I lost my way."

His other hand moved on its own accord, placing itself above his beating heart. Imaginary pain spun a web of discomfort above the area, and then he suddenly couldn't breathe. He stood up abruptly, stumbling backwards in his haste as he clutched his chest.

"When..." he choked out, "...he killed me."

A flash of lightning bathed the room in white, as thunder echoed loudly in his ears...

"So..." his placid self spoke out from the depths of his mind. "Are you done with your drama yet?"

"It's not a drama!" Alfendi shot back. "It's my—"

"Yeah, yeah. Horror story," Placid deadpanned, as Al felt him roll his eyes. "For new recruits."

7:05 pm– Speech

"I'm practicing my monologue to scare away fragile recruits," Al corrected. "Good gracious! Get your scrambled facts straight."

"Whatever you say, drama queen," Placid said. "Now, if you would kindly turn on the main light in this office–"

"Afraid of a little dark?" Alfendi grinned.

"Er...I was very sure that I saw a roach–"

"What?! Where?!"

Alfendi scrambled for leverage as he stood up on his chair.

"How would I know where?" Placid replied with a hint of humor in his voice. "You didn't turn on the light."

7:11– Cockroach

"There was no roach crawling around, was there?" Alfendi inquired with a hint of anger in his voice.

Placid hummed thoughtfully. "He's occupying my personal space right now, actually."

7:12– Insult

Alfendi growled. "I'll get rid of that careless mouth of yours!"

"It's yours too!" Placid countered reasonably.

"Damn it! Come over here and I'll proceed to cut off your tongue..."

"Gladly," Placid answered. "That way, we'll both be eternally mute and speechless."

7:30– Tired

Placid sat back as he rubbed his aching muscles. He never felt so injured in his entire life. He swore quietly as he heard the other him chuckle.

"Shall we get on to the next round?" the other Al said silkily as he cracked his knuckles.

"First," Placid gasped out as he massaged a bruise on his arm. "I need to ask..."

"What?" the other Al asked impatiently.

Placid glared at him mentally. "Why the hell are you beating yourself up, you idiot?"

8:00– Question

"You know," Alfendi spoke after thirty minutes. "That's a really bloody good question. You see–"

"It was a rhetorical question," Placid interrupted.

8:20– Joke

"So shall we solve a case?" Placid questioned him. He flinched as his body jumped up, grabbed a whole shelf of thick, yellow folders and dropped it on his desk.

Alfendi's face split with excitement. "Let's do this."

Placid gaped at the amount of work he had to do tonight. "Please tell me you're not serious."

"MWA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA! Of course, I am."

9:00– Chocolate

"Whether you like it or not, , we will take a break," Placid said as he grabbed a bar of chocolate from a side table. He brandished it at Alfendi's face.

"Kitkat?"

Alfendi grumbled at the distraction. "Fine!" he exclaimed as he unwrapped it and bit the snack without breaking it in half.

"AAAAAAAAH!" Placid panicked. Alfendi dropped the snack in surprise.

"WHAT?" he demanded.

"THAT'S NOT THE WAY YOU EAT IT!" Placid hollered.

9:10– Pizza

Alfendi surveyed the flat box lying on top of his cases. "What have you done, you moron?"

"It's called 'pizza delivery'," Placid said lightly, a hand reaching for the box, but Alfendi grabbed his arm and shoved it off.

"Don't mock me! I obviously know what it is you've done. The info I'm after is whether you're expecting me to ingest that piece of cardboard with red paint splattered all over it!"

"I'm the host here," Placid pointed out. "My pizza, my rules."

Alfendi's eyes squinted suspiciously. "Do you have any IDEA what pizza contains?"

"The lethal combination of bread, cheese, tomatoes, and pepperoni," Placid mused. "I might be as well feeding us poison, eh?"

9:15– Relationship

"I despise you."

"I hate you too."

9:17– Sandwich

Placid grabbed a random folder from the pile. He raised an eyebrow as he glanced at the suspects. He closed it, picked a pen and hovered it over the cover. "So what shall we name it?"

"The Stupid Sandwich of Stupidness," Al suggested.

"Too redundant. Let's name it...'The Hand Sandwich'," Placid decided.

"The Stupid Sandwich of Stupidness," his other self persisted.

9:19– Command

"I therefore declare...a very strict diet."

"Noooooooooooooooooo!"

9:21– Time

"I'm dying."

"It's been barely two minutes, you spineless invertebrate."

9:25– Gah!

"I therefore invoke...my right to eat pizza," Placid declared.

"Nooooooooooooooooooooo!"

9:30–Love

"Out of curiosity," Alfendi started after a few minutes of silence. "Which of us do you think has the best chance with the female masses?"

Placid was taken aback by the unexpected question. "I...er..."

"I think they'll prefer me," Al told him. "A smarter male who has the irresistible charm, rather than a male who doesn't have an idea what women like."

"Excuse me?" Placid said, offended. "I'll have to question your logic. A potential psychopath...or a potential caring husband?"

"A child or a man?"

"The snide master of cynicism or everyone's bestfriend?"

"A hermit living in the comforts of pizza, or an adventurer?"

"Plain pasta hater or a food fanatic?"

"Someone who works at the field or someone who exercises with virtual pixels?"

"Alfiendi or Alfriendi?"

Alfendi paused. "That was a lame Alpundi."

Placid smirked. "Layton or Lameton?"

Alfendi cocked his head. "Placid...or Potty?"

9:40– Brother

"Both–"

"Both–!"

"Both is good."

10:00– Tomorrow

"Why do we get idiotic assistants?" Alfendi inquired. "Can't we get a thinker for a change?"

"Tomorrow, we'll find out. That is...if you don't make an episode," Placid responded.

Alfendi rose. "I'm going to meet up with those Level 5 geniuses."

"The poor fourth wall," Placid mourned, staring at the remains of the shattered simulation screen.

11:00– Result

"So how did it go?" Placid asked.

"You were there, you dumb moron," Alfendi lashed out.

"Yes," Placid confirmed. "I was just observing how you took their response called 'evil laughter'."

12:00– Face

"What do you think our new assistant looks like?" Alfendi asked.

"I haven't got the idea," Placid replied, tossing away a case file. "But I'm sure you'll voice out your unwanted opinion anyway."

"I guess," Alfendi mused, ignoring Placid's answer. "That she will be wearing an orange hat the size of a watermelon, and she shall wear a green upper garment. She'll be petite but perky, and she will have eyes like shining lakes of crimson glory–"

"Correct me if I'm wrong, but would those be the characteristics of your dream girl?"

"W-what?!" Alfendi sputtered defensively. "Are you mental?! What gave you that dumb idea?"

Placid sighed deeply, as he closed his eyes. "The fandom."

1:00– Sleep

"I came up with a better welcoming line for our assistant," Alfendi declared happily.

"..."

"When the introductions are in order and she asks who am I, I will tell her..."

"..."

"...don't you know who I am? I am ..."

"..."

"Your worst nightmare."

"That's amusing," Placid whispered. "And then I'll laugh at it because it was just so corny."

"Go to sleep. Goodnight."

"No really...you have an amazing sense of dark humor–"

"Goodnight, Placid."