Six Months Later...

She pulled up in front of the house, and turned the van into the driveway. They'd only lived there a few weeks, and she still felt like a guest showing up to visit someone else as she pulled into her own garage, but this was home now, and Olivia had come to terms with it. She'd wanted to stay in the city, couldn't imagine living anyplace else, but Elliot had searched listing after listing online before he came up with this place. It had a white picket fence for crying out loud, but when she saw it, she couldn't explain how she felt…it was right…it was their home. Selling her apartment hadn't been as difficult as she thought, she hadn't lived there that long anyway, but selling Elliot's house had taken an emotional toll on everyone. The older kids were hurt, Elliot was sad, and her heart broke for them. She'd almost given in to living there, but it just wasn't feasible for them. They needed a place where everything was on one floor, and the new house was a better fit. Four bedrooms and three bathrooms on the main level, and another two guest rooms and a bathroom in the basement, where Elizabeth and Richard could stay when they came to visit. It needed work because it was pretty outdated with dingy linoleum and stained carpets, peeling wallpaper, and butcher block countertops, but that could all be fixed in time. Luckily they'd made money on the sale of the house and apartment, enough to build up a small nest egg and they didn't want to put it all into remodeling just yet. As hard as it was to move on, it needed to be done and they were all better off for it.

She got out of the van, pushing the button to open the automatic door on the side, and unbuckled Noah from his car seat. "Mommy…I'm hungry," he whined, the afternoon of shopping putting him in a sour mood.

"Let me get the groceries in," she said as he tried to jump down from the van, and landed instead in her arms. He was becoming a little daredevil and it scared her to death. "Would you be careful?" she asked, shaking her head. "Go on in…see if Daddy will make you a peanut butter sandwich." She watched as he ran through the door and then she reached across the van to unhook Ella's baby seat. The little girl smiled and gurgled at her mother, sticking her tongue out and blowing spit bubbles at her, and Olivia's heart melted, "You're a happy girl today, aren't you?" she kissed her daughter on the cheek and pulled the baby seat out of the van, closing the door and carrying her inside.

"Where are the groceries?" Elliot asked, standing at the counter making Noah's sandwich. "You need help bringing them in?"

She sat the baby in her swing, winding it up so it would sway back and forth and motioned to the door, "No…I've got it. Just keep an eye on these two rugrats," she smiled and kissed him. "Hold the door for me." She ran out to the van, pulling open the back doors and looking at the bags of groceries staring back at her. One had toppled over, and there were eggs broken on the gray carpet. "Shit…" she groaned, dreading the cleanup. She'd sold her mustang to get this wholesome family vehicle, something she compared to the same pain Elliot felt over selling his house, but they both had to do what was best for their family. She picked up the mess on the floor, tossing all but the eggs back into the bag, and managed to carry all four bags into the house at once while Elliot held the door for her.

"Where's the turkey?" he asked, noticing she didn't have it. It was the day before Thanksgiving, and it wouldn't be a real holiday without it. "Did you forget it?"

"It's in the van," she sighed, "I only have two hands."

"I'll help you Mommy," Noah offered, running out the door ahead of her, his face and hands smeared with peanut butter.

"Oh great," she shook her head and rushed after him. She made it to the van before Noah, and grabbed the turkey, handing him a stray can of green beans that had fallen on the floor, unsure if it was even from that shopping trip because she didn't actually remember buying them. "Here sweetie," she smiled. "Thanks for your help."

"Ohhhh…" Noah gasped at the broken eggs all over the floor of the van. "You made a mess, Mommy," he giggled. Then he ran back in the house, sitting the green beans on the table and looking at Elliot who was resetting Ella's swing, "Mommy made a big mess!" he laughed.

"You made a mess?" Elliot asked, as she came in with the turkey, tossing it in the kitchen sink. "What kind of mess?"

"A bag tipped over…some eggs broke," she sighed. "I'll clean it up."

"I'll do it," Elliot offered. He grabbed a trash bag from the cabinet and a spray can of cleaner and walked toward the door, slipping his arm into his elbow crutch. It had become second nature to him. Once he'd graduated from the walker, the crutch didn't seem so bad.

Olivia pulled the groceries from the bags, putting them in the refrigerator and cabinet, letting Noah help with things that weren't breakable. He grabbed a jar of pickles without her noticing and dropped it on the floor, and the shattering glass against the floor made her jolt. She looked down at him, on the verge of tears and smiled, "It's okay…it was an accident," she hugged him and kissed him softly. "Don't touch the glass. Why don't you go play in your room while I clean this up?" she suggested. He ran off to his room and she bent down, picking up the broken pieces and tossing them in the trash. Looking at the faded linoleum floor she had to admit her desire to have ceramic tile in the kitchen seemed ridiculous. At least the linoleum could stand up to Noah's wear and tear.

"What happened?" Elliot asked, walking into the kitchen. "Did you make another mess?" he teased.

"Blame this one on Hurricane Noah," she laughed, sweeping the last of the glass into the dustpan and tossing it in the trash. Ella's swing stopped again, and this time the baby gave a soft cry. "She's hungry," Olivia said, mopping up the pickle juice and tossing the mop in the broom closet.

"You feed her," Elliot suggested. "And I will finish putting the groceries away."

Olivia picked up her daughter, and sat at the table, unbuttoning her blouse and letting the baby nurse. She watched Elliot put the rest of the groceries away, "Thanks," she smiled. "I appreciate the help…but you should sit down now. Rest."

Elliot walked slowly to the table and sat next to her, "I'm okay, Liv." He smiled. "You have to stop worrying."

"I'm not worried," she lied. She looked down at the baby and laughed, "She's found her appetite," she smiled.

"Are you working tomorrow night?" he asked, knowing what her answer would be. Ever since she'd gone back to work, the new C.O. had been assigning her to shifts he knew she wouldn't like. Olivia swore she didn't miss being in charge, but he knew better and watching her struggle with a boss who didn't respect her needs as both a cop and a mother hurt.

"Yeah…but not until after dinner," she promised. "And Lizzie and Dickie will be here…so we won't need someone to watch the kids."

"We shouldn't need someone to watch the kids now," he sighed, shaking his head. "I could do it, Liv. I just wish…" he sighed. "I wish I could do it without this fear…that something could go wrong."

He was still plagued by the stress headaches at least once a week, and he's had two seizures since he'd been released from the hospital. Once when Ella was two months old and had started using her new hearing aides and they'd been faced with her crying all day and night because she was having trouble adjusting to the new sounds all around her. Then again just a month ago when they were in the process of moving. Even with the medication, the seizures were unpredictable, and every seizure left him with a new recovery process. Everything seemed to be one step forward and two steps back with his health, and the doctors insisted it wasn't safe for him to be left alone to care for the kids. As much as it hurt, he knew they were right.

"I know," she sighed. "But El…right now you have to work on getting better and nothing else. The kids are fine with a babysitter once in a while at night and daycare during the day."

"I don't think I'm ever going to be better, Liv. We have to face that. I can't even work," he sighed. "I feel like I don't contribute one damn thing to this family…I'm going to have to file for disability just to make ends meet."

"You're here, that's all that matters," Olivia smiled. "And you do a lot around the house during the day…you get up with the baby in the middle of the night…you keep Noah out of my hair while I'm working…" She leaned forward, kissing him softly, "And you know how to keep me happy." She winked and he shook his head and laughed.

The next morning Elliot woke up early, surprised that Olivia wasn't in bed next to him. He stood up slowly, being mindful of the pain in his legs and grabbed his crutch, walking into Ella's room where he expected to find his wife rocking the baby, but she wasn't there. So he checked Noah's room, and laughed at his son, curled up on the far corner of the bed, the covers tossed to the floor. He picked up the blanket, and wrapped it around him and then he noticed the light coming from the kitchen. He walked down the hall, stopping when he saw her there in her blue terry cloth robe, pouring over the back of the turkey package, the raw bird in the sink. "Liv…what're you doing? It's four in the morning."

She looked up at him, biting her bottom lip and shaking her head, "I can't figure out how to cook this. They don't put any real directions on the package."

"Honey…it only takes twenty minutes per pound. If you cook it now, we'll be eating at ten in the morning," he laughed. "Why would you get up at four to roast a turkey?"

She shrugged, "I've always heard it takes a long time." She looked back at the pale bird and grimaced. "This is disgusting…" she sighed. "And I don't know how to make stuffing. I just bought the kind in the box. Do you think the kids will eat it? I know Kathy makes a huge feast every year and I don't want them to be disappointed."

"Liv," he wrapped his arms around her, "Whatever we make…they'll eat…trust me. Besides, I know how to cook the turkey. So I'll show you…and then we'll both know. Okay?"

"El…" she looked seriously at him, tears forming in her eyes. "I don't want to go to work tonight."

"Tell that to your boss," he laughed, but then he realized she was crying and he turned more serious. "You love your job. Don't you?"

She shook her head, "I miss Noah and Ella…and no matter how hard I try, I just don't feel like I'm ever going to be able to give it my all at SVU again." She sighed, "I used to live for that job…but now, I live for you and the kids and our time together…because if I've learned anything this past couple of years, it's that life is short and so many things can happen that can change everything…and I don't want to miss the important things while I'm busy working through other people's problems. SVU is too important to have a cop who doesn't want to give it her all…"

"I can't imagine you not working there, Liv," he admitted. "It's a part of you."

"You left it," she reminded him. "And you said you never regretted it."

"I didn't," he said honestly. "But what are you going to do then? Honey…I hate to put all the financial burden on you…but we need your salary."

"I had an offer," she told him. "I didn't say anything, because I wasn't sure…but standing here in the kitchen looking at this stupid bird…I just kept thinking about all the years down the road when I might not be able to make turkey for the kids on Thanksgiving because I have to work…or all the times I'll miss tucking them in at night…" she sighed. "They're growing up. Maybe I want the chance to take them to preschool or go to a PTA meeting down the road…I don't want my life scheduled around SVU."

"What was the offer?" he asked.

"Cold Case," she answered. "They need a sergeant and the schedule is more flexible. No middle of the night calls or late night arrests. Pretty much nine to five…"

"Cold Case?" he looked unsure. "Are you serious? I can't imagine you doing that."

"Munch did it for a while," she told him. "He liked it."

"Much is crazy," he laughed. "Can you really picture yourself investigating old cases all day? No victims to comfort..."

"I can," she sighed, "Because it would mean I'd be home more and being with you and the kids is more important than any job."

"Olivia Benson, saying her life is more important than the job," he smiled. "Who would've thought?"

She leaned into him, hugging him and resting her head on his chest. "No more night time babysitters…regular daycare during the day…time for us to be a family, El. I want that."

"I want that too," he kissed her on the top of the head. "I love you. Call your boss once the sun comes up and tell him you're not coming in tonight." He laughed. "So what should we do tonight, since you're going to be home?"

"I want to get a Christmas tree," she smiled. "And decorate it with the kids."

"A tree?" he shook his head. "It's not even December. We always decorate on Christmas Eve."

"Lots of people decorate on Thanksgiving," she argued. "Besides…maybe the tree and the lights will distract from the ugly flowered wall paper in the living room."

That evening, Olivia carried the turkey in from the kitchen and sat it in the middle of the dining room table. She looked at Elliot's kids…her step-kids and their children together, laughing and talking. Eli was shoving rolls in his mouth and tossing them across the table to Noah. Richard and Elizabeth were laughing at some joke Elliot had told them. Maureen was holding Ella, while Kate climbed over her smothering the baby with kisses. She flashed back to Christmas, when she'd been so overwhelmed faced with the big family dinner…and now all she could think about was how lucky she was to be a part of it all. She had the family she never thought she'd have…and they had her…forever and always. She let out a deep breath, staring out at everyone. She was a better person because of them…change was hard, but she was grateful for the changes in her life. In heart she knew things wouldn't stay this way forever...but with her family at her side, she could face the changes that lay ahead.

The End

Thank you so much for taking the time to read this story. I'd love to know what you think of it, so reviews are appreciated. :)