A Summer 2014 Ficathon Entry

This picks up during the Season Two finale "A Deadly Game" and goes AU from there. You'll see some familiar dialogue in this chapter.

Chapter 1

He's leaving.

He's actually leaving and she has no idea if he's coming back.

"Whatever the reason is…I'm pretty sure it doesn't include watching you be with another guy."

Espo's words echo in her head, round and round on an endless loop. She'd chosen Tom, so there was no reason for Castle to come back. He doesn't want to see her with someone else.

Except.

Tom isn't right. He doesn't sound right, doesn't smell right, doesn't bring the right coffee, doesn't make her laugh.

"I don't think that this is what I'm looking for right now."

She ends things with Tom. Ends things before they really begin because it isn't right and it isn't what she wants. Tom isn't who she wants.

But Castle…

She's scared. Terrified to tell him how she feels, that she wants to give it a shot. Them. Give them a shot. But the alternative – not telling him – is so much worse because he might not come back.

And she can't live with that.

So it's time. Man up, Kate Beckett.

She breezes through the open doorway, confident, cool, and collected, and heads straight for the metal box serving as a makeshift cooler full of beer bottles. He teases her because that's what he does and she's brave, teases him back right there in front of everyone.

"Oh, I don't need to drink to take him."

It shocks him, if the look on his face is anything to go by. He may have thought they were through, that she didn't care, but he couldn't be more wrong.

His surprise gives her strength. She's knocked him off balance and he's easier to handle that way, it's easier to push past her fear. It's now or never.

"Castle, do you have a second?"

"Of course." He jumps up, never hesitates to come when she calls, and she waits by the door, closing it behind them once he passes. A whiff of his cologne trails behind him and the scent is just right. It's intoxicating, infusing her with confidence because he is what she wants.

"What's up?" His words are normal, easygoing. He doesn't suspect – or doesn't want to assume anything – and she feels her nerves set in.

Her heart beats faster, hands shaking as she worries the bottle cap between her fingers. "Look, I know that I'm not the easiest person to get to know and I don't always let on what's on my mind-"

The corners of his lips lift in a smile, a beautiful smile that he never hesitates to share. She's terrified, but he makes her feel safe, makes what she's about to say okay, and pushing past the knots in her stomach, a sense of peace descends.

"But this past year, working with you, I've had a really good time."

"Yeah, me too."

There. The first part is out. Step one, tell him he's appreciated, that he matters.

And now for step two, tell him he's wanted.

"So I'm just gonna say this..." Looking away, just for a second, she sucks in an uneven breath. His eyes are so blue, his smile so incredibly bright, and she blurts the next part out before it lodges too deep within her throat. "I was wondering if the invitation was still open."

"What?"

The furrow of his brow is adorable, his confusion clear as day, and she feels stronger now that it's been said.

"I want to go to the Hamptons with you." The clarification floats off her tongue, nothing suppressing her confidence.

His mouth drops open, the answer she desperately needs to hear balancing on the tip of his tongue–

"Richard, you ready?"

Wait, what?

Turning to look over his shoulder at the interruption, he stutters, "Hey…Gina."

Like an observer at tennis match, his head twists back and forth between them, apparently unable to work out who should hold his attention, and then Gina steps up next to him.

She's too close to him, too comfortable by his side, and Kate's stomach knots back up.

"Beckett, you remember Gina, my ex-wife."

"And publisher." Gina rolls her eyes as she says the words, sticking her hand out for Beckett to shake. She does so on autopilot, the confusion and dread running rampant through her veins. The guilty expression contorting Castle's face is too prominent for this to just be a business meeting.

Forcing her voice to reflect the nonchalance she wishes she felt, Kate pretends as if she hasn't just torn down her walls and revealed her vulnerable core to him. "Yeah, we spoke the other day. It looks like you finally tracked him down."

"Oh, yeah. He's such a little boy sometimes. I mean I don't know why," Gina smiles innocently, her arm sliding into the crook at Castle's elbow, seemingly oblivious to the mounting tension in the room.

Risking a glance at Castle, Kate catches him staring back at her, eyes wide, body frozen like a deer in headlights.

"It's not like I bite. Much." Rolling her eyes again, Gina's lips lift into a conspiratorial smile, like she's sharing a secret with Kate, before she turns her attention to Castle. "But we better get going or we're going to be stuck in traffic all night."

Wait. What?!

"Going?"

Gina turns back to her, excitement oozing out of her and Kate's skin crawls. No fucking way is Castle taking his ex-wife-

"To the Hamptons."

Or maybe he is.

Kate risks another glance at Castle and his cheeks are bright red, lips parted, eyebrows raised, clearly trying and failing to say something.

That answers that then. Apparently the invitation isn't still open.

"Ummmm."

His attempt at explaining himself is laughable – if she were in a laughing mood, that is – but instead she's just pissed. Her heart rate increases, the blood rushing through her veins is a rapid waterfall of hurt, but she pushes it all deep within her, forces all expression from her face as she punishes herself further by asking, "For the weekend?"

Gina's voice, light and clear, unknowingly digs the knife in just a little further. "No for the summer actually. So I can stay on top of him while he finishes his book."

She has got to be joking! Seriously? How has this gone from Castle begging her to come to the Hamptons, to now, Gina proudly on top in just a few days? How is that even possible?

"I'm sorry. I didn't think the two of you got along."

"We didn't but then last night on the phone we started talking and we ended up talking for hours. Just like old times." Gina leans her head against Castle's bicep as she smiles at Kate.

She looks so happy, like someone should look when they're starting something new, even if she's starting something new for a second time, and Kate's stomach rolls. She's heard enough. Time to get out of here.

Castle starts to speak, but she jumps in before he has a chance to completely destroy what little dignity she has left by rejecting her outright.

"Oh, well, have a great time. Good to see you again, Gina." She offers a quick wave as she speaks, forcing herself to look into his eyes before she turns away. "Goodbye, Castle."

"Beckett, wait."

He seems to have finally found his voice, not that it helps; it's too late and she's already heading back to her desk. Paperwork needs to be done for Faraday's case and she's suddenly in the market for some good, mind-numbing distractions.

"Kate, please."

No. No, she can't stop, won't stop. Her heels clack against the floor, the sound refreshing, and she holds her head high. Angry tears threaten to fall, but she won't allow it, won't give him the satisfaction.

"Kate, come on. Wait just a second."

His hand wraps around her arm, presumably to get her to stop, and hell no is he dictating anything that she does in her precinct. Spinning around, she finds herself eye to eye with him thanks to the heels on her shoes, and he startles at the movement. "What for? It's pretty clear that you have your summer laid out already."

"Just let me explain."

He's still holding onto her, but the fierce heat from his grip is too much. She rips her skin away from his, rubbing the area to alleviate the phantom feel of his touch. "Castle, go back to your summer plans, your ex-wife." Disgust drips from her words like venom from a snake's fangs, and he recoils in response. "I've got work to do."

Turning away from him again, she continues on the path to her desk.

"Kate. Just stop."

She seethes, because of course he can't just let it go, and then, swinging back to him, she lowers her voice, the anger that's simmering inside spills out.

"Why? So you can ridicule me some more in front of everyone I work with? No thanks. God, I knew it was a mistake to let myself feel anything for you. To say anything at all."

She shakes her head, eyes closing as she inhales deeply. "I thought you were different from that guy on page six but you're not. So forget about it. Have a great summer, Castle. I hope you and Gina are very happy together this time around."

And with that, she sits in her chair, grabbing the closest file and a pen, completely ignoring him as he stands there, lips turned down in a frown.

Angling her head toward the desk, her hair falls, a curtain that hides her face, and she controls her breaths to keep from losing it. His gaze burns the back of her head as he looms over her, and a shiver races down her spine.

He stands quietly just for a moment before his hands land on her desk, his face hovering too close, staring her down, daring her to fight him. "What the hell did you expect me to do, Kate? You're dating another guy. You explicitly told me you had better things to do."

Locking her glare with his, she can't help but rise to the bait. "So, what? You go pick up the next shiny bimbette that walks by? Real mature, Castle."

"Would you rather I just sit here pining while you run around with Demming? Continue to chase after you like a lost puppy? Make a complete fool of myself? Sorry, but I'm not that pathetic and I sure as hell know how to take a hint."

He stands, straightens to his full height and she can't help but look up at him. His eyes are blazing, lips a narrow slit as he spits his next words in her face. "It's been a pleasure being thoroughly emasculated by you, Detective, but, if you don't mind, I'll see you in the fall." With that he turns on his heel, striding away as her heart shatters.

"Don't bother!" She hollers the words at his back, causing his steps to falter, before he rights himself and continues moving. Reaching Gina, he tangles his fingers with hers before heading straight for the elevator.

It's not until a few minutes after the doors close that she realizes just about everyone is alternating between staring at her and staring at where Castle disappeared. Looking around the room, sending a glare to anyone brave enough to catch her eye, she finally notices Lanie's quiet presence in Castle's – no, it's not Castle's chair anymore – in the chair beside her desk.

"You wanna tell me what just happened?"

Kate drops her head into her hands, rubbing circles on to her temple in an effort to stave off the pounding headache that has begun to settle in. "Nothing happened. I'm fine."

Lanie rolls her eyes, doesn't appear to buy a word of it. Not that Kate ever expected her to.

"Alright, fine. Keep holding it in. You know where to find me when you need to talk."

Still massaging her temples, Kate watches as Lanie crosses the room, back to the boys.

She is fine.

They've each made their choice, said what they needed to say, and it didn't work out. And it's fine.

Totally fine.

Thank you to Kylie and Jo for the flails, betas, and smiles. xo