Just a Little Joke
by Meimi

Written for Ajora's amusement (especially since it came to fruition off of one of her ideas). This is a bit slashy, btw.


Yama settled down uncomfortably into the chair as directed by the captain. This was not going the way he'd expected. Then again, had anything gone the way he'd expected it to on this crazy pirate ship? He'd assumed it was just a joke, a little game to break in the rookie. Everybody does it eventually. Best to just get it over with. Right? The others had laughed uproariously at the very concept, so they had certainly assumed his embarrassment was nigh. And he hadn't minded it, not really. He'd definitely had to do worse back when he'd been a member of the Gaian fleet. And at least there was actual humor attached to this stupid crap as opposed to other things. Man up, proposition the captain, get blown off, go back and get falling down drunk with the others, and then get on with his life. No problem. Except Harlock hadn't rebuffed him, and now he was somewhere entirely different than he'd expected to be tonight. Shit. How the hell was he going to get out of this? And did he even want to?

No, that last question wasn't safe territory to venture into. Best to not go there. Yama glanced surreptitiously around the room, it was strange enough to knock his thoughts onto another track. This ship was just the strangest thing ever. The architecture in and of itself was bizarre to begin with, but half the time it almost felt as if the Arcadia was somehow alive. As for this room, why in the hell did it even exist? An enormous gothic dining room that looked like it came straight out of some old school horror story dredged up from humanity's long forgotten past should not fit anywhere, much less the most feared pirate ship in the galaxy. And yet, here he was, sitting in the middle of it and wondering what the hell he'd gotten himself into.

And throughout Yama's entire desperate assessment of his current situation, Harlock had been over by the table, busying himself with pouring what appeared to be wine into two snifter glasses. Definitely a red, and probably a rich one to boot. Not a single part of this boded well for him. God, he was so screwed. And quite literally soon. That should bother him a lot more than it did. What the hell was wrong with him? "Don't worry." Yama jerked slightly in surprise as Harlock finally spoke up. "I know exactly what's going on here."

He did? Yama blinked, but stayed silent as the captain picked up one of the glasses, shifted over towards him, and offered it to him. Which part did he understand? The proposition being a joke, the crew bonding over stupid shit because of it, or... other things? Yama wasn't sure he was too keen on investigating the latter. Their fingers brushed together for a brief moment as he accepted the glass. Yama's mouth went dry from the sensation. Okay, he might have a problem. He hadn't really thought much about the Arcadia's captain before. There hadn't been much point to it. Ezra had wanted him dead, that's all that had really mattered at the time. Only it really hadn't and he'd made some really fucking awful decisions in the meantime. Still, he'd never put much stock in the legend, or the crew's reticence at going against Harlock, much less disagreeing with him. It was just hero worship, right? There was no such thing as heroes. Why would he ever see the captain in that sort of light? He didn't believe in it. Nothing was perfect, much less people. But maybe that was the real problem, he'd gone into this entire thing viewing Harlock as human to begin with. And for a human being, he was quite the figure.

Harlock cocked his head slightly in what was probably curiosity, but moved back towards the table. "I'm not unaware of the crew's dalliances," he explained, his tone even as he leaned back against the table and crossed his arms, "They don't do this often, but it does happen every now and then." Well, at least he didn't sound angry about it or anything. Maybe this wouldn't turn out too bad after all. Just a joke gone sideways, and that was all. No harm, no foul. Yama's hormones could just think about something else. "But I suppose it's a point in your favor that they're already playing games with you. They don't pull this crap with people they don't like." Oh. Well... that was good. And Harlock actually sounded a tiny bit amused by it. Double good?

"I do think it's time you were informed of something though," Harlock continued, his expression turning serious. Something wrong? "I'm afraid that thanks to your rather unusual addition to the crew, certain things were overlooked. They shouldn't have been, but they were." He almost sounded apologetic. That was different. "There's really only one unshakeable rule on the Arcadia." Oh. Well, here's hoping he hadn't messed up too bad then. Asides from the whole trying to kill the captain, betraying them all, capturing the ship, nearly getting them all executed, and then everything else after that... Couldn't be too bad, right? "If you sincerely don't want to do something, then you do not have to."

What? That was- What?

The captain was smirking slightly at Yama in obvious amusement. Ah, his bafflement must be showing. It was quite the odd... thing though. You always followed orders on a battleship. Always. How could that even work? "It must sound ridiculous to you," Harlock's smile turned almost nostalgic as he looked away for a moment, "but that's just the way of things on this ship. Just give it a little time to sink in, soon enough it'll start making perfect sense."

Yama nodded dubiously, but stayed silent as he finally took a sip of the wine. An excellent vintage, as expected. He briefly wondered about how it had been acquired - flat out theft or smuggling - but his thoughts were interrupted by the captain again. "As for why I brought you up here," Harlock was still smiling as he pushed off from the table. That smile had an odd intensity to it now though. What... what was he up to? "I think I'm well acquainted enough with you by now to know why you did it." Yama unconsciously pressed back into the chair as the captain practically stalked over to him, then leaned down languidly to whisper in his ear. "It's because you wanted to."

His tone was dark and full of the promise of things that sent sharp, but not unpleasant shivers tingling up Yama's spine. Right then. Yes, he was screwed, quite literally. Harlock may only have sported one eye, but it was no less smoldering as he plucked the glass from Yama's lax grasp and returned it to the table. "I'm going to take you to bed," the captain said almost conversationally while he had his back to Yama, "Because you want me to." Harlock turned around then, his cape, cloak, whatever swirling just so. He really was quite good with that. It was definitely the perfect image for the most feared pirate in the entire galaxy. Yama pressed back further into the chair as Harlock leaned over him again, arms coming to rest on either side of him. "And because I want to."

Oh. Well then. Yama blinked as hands took ahold of him, pulling him forward. His brain was having a little trouble keeping up with reality at this point. Not that it really mattered, because it shorcircuited a second later as insistent lips pressed against his own. Right. Pirate captain. Of course, he'd be excellent at plundering unsuspecting mouths with that tongue of his. Great joke right there, Yama would have to remember that. And fuck, if this really was going to happen then what the hell, might as well enjoy himself. He wouldn't have said no anyway. Harlock really was very appealing. Yama reached up, his fingers fisting in trailing fabric as he pulled the captain closer.

Harlock chuckled as he drew back for a moment, then leaned over further and breathed heavily into Yama's ear, "That's assuming we make it that far." He trailed his fingers down Yama's back, digging in until he could feel the curve of spine through the thick clothing. "I could take you right here," Harlock murmured huskily in Yama's ear, "On the table. Would you like that, Yama?"

Yama couldn't help but shiver at the mental imagery that produced. Definitely wouldn't say no to that, or anything else at this point. "I'd like... just about anything you want to do right now," he barely managed as Harlock nipped at his earlobe. It was the first thing he'd said in this ridiculous room and he didn't regret a damn thing about it. Sex on the table, huh? Not a bad idea. At all.

"Hmmm." Yama grit his teeth as that heavy hum went straight through him. Very, very, very appealing captain of the Arcadia. God, he was doomed. "Another time then." Oh? Yama blinked blankly as Harlock stood up and pulled him up as well. "I have to make sure you can walk in the morning." What? Yama's mind stuttered over the implications as he was pushed gently in the opposite direction of the dining room's entrance. "The table won't work very well for that, so bed it is." The bed, huh? Yama mentally shrugged to himself and allowed the captain to direct him. No complaints, really. It was a much better way to spend the night than he'd been expecting.

Next time, huh? He wouldn't mind that. He wouldn't mind that at all.