A/N : Thanks for reading, as always. :D

Chapter 2

Bus To Nowhere

It felt like they had been walking for days.

Actually, it had only been a few hours.

It didn't make any sense, but those hours had felt like years and seconds at the same time.

The morning sun was bright and high, people were crowding the streets to get to work, and Magnus and Ludwig had been walking for hours.

Tired as hell, from lack of sleep, but they still kept on.

Magnus loved every second of it, no matter how many times conversation was interrupted by yawning.

His stomach started bitching a little while later, although Ludwig seemed pretty content, so he scrounged up his money and grabbed coffee and pastries to go. Ludwig humored him and took what he offered, maybe knowing in some way that doing so would make Magnus happy. Finally, they sat down together on the edge of a fountain, coffee on the ground before them, leaned back on their palms, and started to make a plan of action.

Ludwig's hair was almost as messy as his own by now, pale as could be and circles hanging under his eyes, and both of them could probably have used a shave.

Still, they smiled at each other as they conversed.

"Where do you wanna go first?" Magnus asked, as Ludwig swung his feet idly.

Ludwig's home was closer than his own, so looking for Ludwig's sanity came first.

"I don't know," came Ludwig response. "I don't even know where to start. How can you look for something you can't see?"

Good question.

"Well," Magnus began, carefully, "When's the first time they started tellin' ya you were crazy?"

Ludwig, looking around the street as people walked by, gave a 'hm' of thought, and then said, "Probably always, but the first I can remember, I think it was when I was fifteen. I went to school, and then, the next thing I knew, I was back home again, and I couldn't remember how I got there. After that, I started hearing it a lot. Dunno why. I dropped out not long after."

Magnus pursed his lips, and then said, "Well, why don't we go there and see what we find?"

Ludwig snorted.

"Sure, why not?"

Magnus stood up, extended his hand to Ludwig, yanked him to his feet, and they went back into the street.

This time, Ludwig led.

Magnus followed Ludwig along twisting roads to the bus stop. Felt a little like a dog, slobbering on Ludwig's heels as he was, but he found he couldn't really help himself.

Ludwig coulda walked into a fuckin' volcano and Magnus woulda dropped in right behind him.

The small talk they made as they walked was worth any amount of his dignity.

They got to the stop soon after, had to fight against the crowd to get into the bus, and Magnus was glad to sit as close to Ludwig as possible when they successfully broke through the mass.

If there was one thing he had learned in his time here, it was that Germans sure as hell didn't form nice, orderly lines at bus stops.

They survived the free-for-all, and Magnus had to forcibly keep his arm down, because the urge to throw it up on the back of the seat and sling it over Ludwig's shoulder was tempting.

Way tempting.

He didn't go all out that time, because he had only known Ludwig for about fifteen hours, but he did let his hand wander a little.

He had always been a toucher, and Ludwig didn't swat his hand away when he kept reaching out and brushing it down Ludwig's arm. Lowered his eyes in embarrassment and shifted a lot, sure, but didn't slap him.

He'd take what he could get.

Some people just couldn't get used to his physicality.

The bus went on, and the morning had turned into late afternoon by the time they got off again.

Magnus looked around, and realized how far south they had gone. Closer to Austria, now. Ludwig looked around, too, to get his bearings, and started leading Magnus along.

It wasn't long before they found their destination.

He had hated school, always had, so walking back up to one was a little unpleasant, but he trailed behind Ludwig dutifully as they approached the stone schoolhouse.

Students had gone off by now, but teachers remained, no doubt, and it was obvious that it was a teacher that Ludwig had in mind.

He looked around at the building, seemed daunted, and stood still.

"Aren't you gonna go in?" Magnus asked, and Ludwig rolled a restless shoulder before shaking his head.

"No. I think I'd rather just wait until he comes out."

"Who?"

They went to the front of the building and settled up against the wall, and Ludwig eyed the place with an obvious lack of fondness.

A shared sentiment, it seemed.

"My history teacher. He never liked me much, and I never knew why, so he must have known something that I didn't. He always looked at me like I was crazy, anyway. It was in his class, I think, that I don't remember leaving, so maybe he'll tell me something."

Magnus pushed out his lips, stared at his feet, and stayed silent.

Wind blew.

Ludwig waited outside the door, and Magnus watched the minutes tick by into an hour.

Finally, weary teachers started filing out, done with their day's work.

Ludwig popped up on his toes, and quickly honed in on one of them.

Magnus followed him at a distance, and watched when Ludwig came up to a man, and cried, "Mr. Zwingli! Hey, wait!"

The man, a rather severe looking specimen of a teacher, stopped and turned his head for the source of the voice.

Ludwig stopped, the teacher saw him, and Magnus waited. A long stare, and then the man seemed to recognize Ludwig.

"What are you doing here, Mr. Beilschmidt?"

Ludwig seemed encouraged that he was remembered.

"I'm sorry to bother you, sir, I just wanted to ask you something."

"What?"

"I know— Well, before I left, was I...acting strange, or anything? Can you remember anything odd about me? Like, did I do or, or say anything weird?"

Silence.

The hesitation seemed long and awkward, and Magnus could see the man shifting his weight, as if contemplating how to handle this situation.

Wondering, perhaps, if this question was one he should really be answering or not.

To lie or not to lie.

The man, face still so stern, finally said, "I think it would be better of you to ask your classmates, Mr. Beilschmidt. Although you're no longer my student, I have to say that this conversation seems extremely inappropriate. Unless you're enrolled here, you shouldn't be on campus."

Magnus pursed his lips and tried to keep a handle on his irritation.

What a jerk. Ludwig had only wanted to ask a damn question. Could have at least let him down easy.

Ludwig's shoulders slumped a little, his brow crinkled in either hurt or embarrassment, and he was quick to backtrack.

"I'm sorry. You're right. I'm—sorry."

With that, Ludwig turned around and walked away, and Magnus could see the paleness of mortification on his face.

Magnus trotted behind him to catch up, and at the last second, his agitation got the better of him and he called over his shoulder, "Didn't have to be a dick about it!"

The teacher looked back, too, mouth hanging open in disbelief, and Magnus lifted his chin and narrowed his eyes in distaste. Didn't get to see much else, though, because Ludwig had suddenly thrown an arm around his neck and started hauling him away forcibly, nearly strangling him in the process.

Damn.

Ludwig had a vice grip.

When they were back out on the sidewalk, Ludwig released his neck, Magnus could breathe again, and they shared a look.

Now what?

Ludwig looked around a little, looking so helpless, and Magnus rubbed at the back of his neck in restlessness.

Disappointment. Kinda sucked, seeing Ludwig look so disheartened.

He tried to perk him up and leaned forward, prodding Ludwig from behind with a gentle fist.

"Well!" he said, in an effort to make Ludwig smile. "This wasn't the only school you went to, was it? I know you're not givin' up that easy. Let's go back further."

So they did.

They walked some more, and before long they were in front of a smaller school.

This time, Ludwig took a more direct approach, went into the front office and procured a slip of permission, and went into the building.

The tiled halls were a strange sight, and it was hard for Magnus to not feel like he was six years old again.

Lockers and sloppy drawings hung up on the walls.

Bright colors.

Ludwig turned his head towards each door, read the name, and carried on. Before he could see a name he recognized, however, he found the person instead.

A woman, blonde hair tied up into a bun above her head, walked quickly down the hall beyond them, and Ludwig chased after her.

"Hey!"

She stopped, and looked over her shoulder, brow high in curiosity.

Ludwig rushed forward, and stopped in front of the woman.

"Hey! Ms. Kirkland! Hey, do you remember me?"

A long look of scrutiny, and then a bright smile.

"Sure I do, Ludwig. How have you been? My goodness, you've turned into a handsome young man, haven't you? I can't believe how tall you are!"

Ludwig smiled, a bit awkwardly, and shuffled his feet, but seemed pleased at the friendlier greeting.

The woman's face was as bright as her smile as she looked Ludwig up and down.

"Gosh! I just can't believe it. What brings you back here Ludwig? Have you been alright? I bet you're doing great. You were always so smart."

A tinge of red on Ludwig's cheeks, and he finally spoke.

"Say, I just wanted to ask... Well, do you remember when I was in class? That is, do you remember anything...strange? About me?"

Her smile foundered a little, and she was the one now who shuffled her feet, turning her eyes back and forth between Ludwig and Magnus.

"Well. Strange. How do you mean, Ludwig? Everybody's a little strange, right?"

Ludwig just stared at her, and she folded a little.

"Well, it's not—! Your brother always said it was better just to ignore it. It's not that big a deal, Ludwig. Just, sometimes, when you were in class, sometimes you just talked a little funny. You looked confused sometimes, like you couldn't remember how you got there. They took you out of my class for a month to take you to the hospital. Don't you remember any of that?"

A strange falling of Ludwig's face, and the answer was obviously, 'No.'

When Ludwig shook his head, the woman reached out and put a hand on his shoulder.

"Well! Like I said, everyone's a little strange. Anyway," she added, brightly, "It just gives you character, is all! Why would ya wanna be like all those other boring guys, huh?"

Ludwig's smile came back up, and Magnus was smiling, too.

Kinda liked this broad.

"Did you ever know what I was in the hospital for?"

"I'm afraid not, Ludwig. Your brother wouldn't tell me that much."

She peered up at tall Ludwig, and seemed very content to leave her hand on his shoulder.

"What makes you ask, though, if you don't mind me wondering?"

Ludwig just said, "My brother's just been worrying a lot lately."

She gave a 'hm', and said, "Well. You look like you're doing just fine, so maybe he shouldn't be. Besides, even though you were a little odd, you never wanted to hurt anyone, and I think that's the most important thing. One of the other kids hit you once, don't know if you remember or not, and I always remembered that you didn't hit him back. You were a sweetie. Looks like you still are!"

Ludwig ducked his head a little, and Magnus could see in his twisted smile that he was embarrassed.

In a good way.

Shifting his weight and looking somehow pleased and humiliated at the same time, Ludwig just said, "Well, thanks for talkin' to me. I appreciate it."

"Of course, Ludwig. Anything I can do to help. Being a teacher doesn't just last 'til the kids are out your classroom, that's what I believe."

"Thanks."

They turned, and meant to leave.

Didn't make it far.

As they went, she called after them, "Say, Ludwig! You're all grown up and not my student anymore, and I'm still 'miss'!"

Ludwig's face went so red that Magnus was surprised he didn't catch fire, and he looked over his shoulder, eyes wide and eyebrows nearly up into his hair, and he stammered back, "Oh! Erhm—I'll keep that in mind! Thanks, Ms. Kirkland."

"Call me Alice."

Magnus was pretty sure that Ludwig had actually swallowed.

She smiled, Ludwig said 'goodbye' and whipped back around to speed towards the door, and the very second that he was outside, he burst into mortified giggles.

Magnus sent him a leer, and was quick to add a little insult to injury.

"I can see it already," he crooned. "Mr. Ludwig Kirkland. She's definitely the man."

Ludwig muttered something foul under his breath, sent Magnus a glare, but kept smiling all the same.

After the last let down, it was good to see Ludwig smiling.

Magnus lifted his chin, thoughtfully, and said, "I bet Alfred woulda liked her."

"Who's that?" Ludwig asked.

Magnus waved a hand, and just said, "This weird guy I know."

Ludwig sighed, shook his head, and walked on.

The schools didn't get them much else after that. Just more things that Ludwig couldn't remember.

Back to nowhere, then.

Ludwig's sanity wasn't in the school.

"Where else could we go?" Magnus asked, as Ludwig stared at his shoes, and there was a shrug.

"I don't know. I mean, the only thing I could think of would be my brother, but he won't tell me anything. Never would. The hospital wouldn't tell me, either, I don't think."

"What about the kids you went to school with?"

Ludwig sent him a strange look then, suddenly looking a bit sad.

"I didn't really know any of them that well. I never had friends."

Oh.

A long, awkward silence, and then Magnus reached out, clapped a hand on Ludwig's back, and started walking again.

"Ah, don't worry about it," he said. "I never had any, either. I was too obnoxious, or so they said."

Ludwig's smile crept back up.

Most friends were overrated, anyway.

So Ludwig turned to Magnus as they walked back down the street, and he said, "Well. What about you? When was the first time you got called crazy?"

"I don't know," he replied, honestly. "I think it's been my whole life, because I just always grew up knowing I was nuts."

"Alright, when's the first time you can remember?"

He scrunched his brow in thought, and tried to call up memories.

"My dad, before he left. I think I was like seven or eight, he used to say I wasn't right in the head. My mom always told me he was wrong, but I always knew better."

"Where's your mom?"

"She died three years ago."

"What about your dad?"

Magnus paused for a second in thought, and then said, "I don't know. I haven't seen him since he left. I don't know where's he at."

Ludwig looked over at him, and lifted his brow.

"Why don't we look for him and see if we can find him?"

Ha.

"Well," Magnus said, with a low voice, "I don't think we're gonna walk all the way up to Denmark."

Ludwig looked at him, quite seriously, and said, "Why not?"

Well, when Ludwig said it like that...

Magnus straightened up then, tucked his hands in his pockets, and scoffed.

Why not?

"Yeah," he finally said, "Why not? Ah, why the hell not?"

He reached out, this time resting his hand on the back of Ludwig's arm, and Ludwig looked over at him shortly after, saying, "You sure do like to touch a lot."

"Sorry," he said, although he wasn't. "Guess I've always been that way. Does it bother you?"

A pause, and then, "No. Not really. You remind me of my brother."

And that must have been a good thing, because Ludwig let him walk there with his hand still above his elbow and made no move to brush him off.

"Wanna take the bus back up?"

"Nah," Ludwig was quick to respond. "Feels nice to be able to walk for a while. My brother keeps me cooped up inside so much."

Possessive, huh? Or maybe Ludwig was just that crazy.

"Well, let's walk, then."

That was that, apparently, and they walked until darkness fell.

That night, they crashed in a cheap motel, and although they both were interested in getting to know the other a little better, they went out like lights in exhaustion and slept until it was time to check out.

They took a little more action that next day, and remembered that going on a long journey meant having certain items, and they pooled together their money to buy backpacks and fill them up with necessities. Razors and toothbrushes, little bathroom supplies. Water bottles.

They bought a map, and scribbled a line up through Germany and into Denmark.

A long trip, but not a boring one.

Magnus was jittery and restless, and was excited to start out.

He felt like a little kid again.

Adventure.

They slept wherever was the cheapest, and sometimes they just slept wherever they stopped walking.

The third night, outside the city, they walked along a winding road until they had found an appealing patch of trees and undergrowth to huddle beneath.

Magnus, as shameless in adulthood as he had been in childhood, was quick to grab Ludwig around the chest and yank him in, under the excuse that it was freezing.

Yeah. That was why.

As with everything else, Ludwig was patient and humored him.

The weather was getting colder, though, and some nights were just too damn freezing to be outside, so they scrounged up money for a cheap motel.

A surreal, if not pleasant, experience.

In the nights, they squeezed together in a small bed, trying to fit two pairs of long legs into limited space, they put their hands behind their heads and chatted until they fell asleep, and Magnus slept so much better in these shitty hotels than he had in the psych ward.

Catching up on rest he had lost.

Hard not to rest well, with someone beside of him.

In the mornings, they woke up with sighs, arms tossed over their heads as the sun broke through the window, they sat up, shared looks, and Magnus always enjoyed the sight of Ludwig's hair sticking up to the ceiling in every which direction, pale and docile as consciousness crept back in.

Ludwig was pretty. He had been right about that.

There wasn't anything quite like reaching out a heavy hand and plopping it on the top of Ludwig's messy head, and when Ludwig looked over at him sleepily, happiness was the feeling in his chest.

When they finally got up, sometimes later rather than earlier, they found breakfast, downed terrible hotel coffee like water, shaved, and Magnus always made a point of holding the door open for Ludwig, because the high brow of flattered contentment on Ludwig's face was quite worth it.

Stepping outside was like stepping into a different world every day.

Magnus found himself starting life all over again every morning.

No job? No house? No car?

No problem.

Winging it.

It was the happiest he had been in a long time, wandering down long, desolate roads with a new friend, making small talk and bumping into each other every so often just because, not being alone and having someone who didn't look at him like he was a fuckin' whacko.

Not knowing quite what the day would bring.

Not knowing where they would sleep until they got there.

As they walked, Ludwig asked once, "What are we gonna do if we actually find our sanity, huh?"

Erhm—!

"I dunno!" Magnus looked over, and raised a finger to poke it in Ludwig's temple. "Guess we'll try to shove it back in or something."

"You're crazy," was Ludwig's dry response.

"Thanks!"

Ludwig shook his head, but still smiled.

Day after day, they got farther and farther, and even though his feet were sore, Magnus was willing to go ever farther.

They drew nearer to where they had boarded the bus in the first place, and, after nine days, something interesting finally happened.

Started very calmly.

They spent the night in a dingy hotel because the sky had been grey and overcast with the threat of snow, the bed creaked too much, and Ludwig had spent hours tossing and turning.

Ludwig woke up that morning in an odd mood, and was quiet for hours on end, sending Magnus strange looks out of the corner of his eye.

Magnus wasn't exactly sure what had shifted. Maybe being cramped into that tiny bed and kicking each other all night long had irritated Ludwig.

Maybe he hadn't slept well.

All Magnus knew was that he had woken up much earlier than he usually did, tossed his arms over his head like always, and when he flipped over to gawk at Ludwig, Ludwig was already awake and sitting up on the bed and glancing down at him in short intervals.

Silence.

"Morning."

Ludwig didn't respond, and sat there with knees up to his chest, glowering away at Magnus until he finally got up to trudge over to the rickety little table in the corner in an effort to put some space between them.

Nice try.

Magnus rolled out of bed and followed him, sat down, and finally tried to talk to sulky Ludwig a little, asking, "You hungry? I can make breakfast. Kind of."

Ludwig just stared at him, and then gave a thick, noncommittal, "Hm."

Magnus sat there for a second, scooted his chair a little closer, and put his arm on the table, settling his chin on his fist.

Ludwig narrowed his eyes into slits, and tottered his chair away.

Well. Looked like there was a newcomer in town.

He'd met one. Apparently there were more.

Excellent—'bout time he met someone as interesting as he was.

As he had with that Alfred guy, Magnus leaned forward and tried to get a good look at this one.

Quiet and obviously a moper, he kept his brow low and lips pursed, and seemed a little suspicious of Magnus being so close to him. As Alfred had run a hand constantly through his own hair, this guy kept on reaching up and scratching irritably at the bridge of his nose in apparent agitation.

"Or what about coffee?" he tried, and Ludwig shifted a little, sending him a glance that was bordering very close on being distasteful.

Magnus was hardly distressed.

Kinda liked trying to figure out who Ludwig was at any given time, and he kinda liked trying to get to know each one.

He reached out, touching Ludwig's hair as he often did in the mornings, and his hand was promptly swatted away for the first time.

When Ludwig looked at him from under a low brow, he said, sternly, "How d'I know you again?"

His voice was the same pitch as Ludwig's was, but enunciation had changed. Sloppier speech.

Magnus just smiled at this suddenly sully Ludwig, and tried to reach out to him again.

"We're friends, remember?"

Ludwig stared at him a bit morosely, and then gave a 'hmph' and crossed his arms.

"I'm Magnus. Who are you?"

No answer.

His fingers brushed Ludwig's hair, and Ludwig kept swatting him away. Even though Ludwig could have really hurt him if he had half a mind to, he didn't lift his hand, apparently moody but gentle, and just glared at him.

Cute.

"Ludwig? Come on, Ludwig, I just wanna—"

When Ludwig did speak again, he snapped, "Stop callin' me that, ya weirdo."

Magnus smiled, and reached out yet again, to be slapped away yet again. "Well! You won't tell me your name, so what am I supposed to call you?"

Jeez—so far, every single one of Ludwig's personalities had pointed out how weird he was.

Talk about pot and kettle.

Ludwig was weirder than he was.

He kept on being himself, and put his hand back out no matter how many times it was shoved away.

"If ya keep touching me," came the rumbling mutter, "I'll break yer fingers."

Sure.

All talk.

"Tell me your name, then!" Magnus said, as he reached out for the thousandth time, and this time Ludwig snatched up, grabbed his hand in a firm grip, and sent him a glare that was suddenly bordering on being a damn laser.

If looks could kill, Magnus was pretty sure he'd be six feet under somewhere.

No doubt Ludwig was lamenting the fact that Magnus was still very much alive, and finally he crinkled his nose, let go of Magnus' hand, and said, gruffly, "Berwald."

Magnus beamed, and fell back into his chair triumphantly.

"That's more like it!"

Ludwig crinkled his nose and turned his head away, resting his chin in his palm and he stared holes into the wall.

He didn't say a word after that, no matter how hard Magnus tried to irritate him.

The first guy had been fun, yeah, but Magnus wasn't quite as fond of this second one, so he slunk in ever closer, despite the burning looks that Berwald dude kept sending him, and he tried to get Ludwig back.

At least Ludwig liked him.

Somehow, after a tiny battle of hand-swatting, Magnus managed to push forward enough to corner Ludwig and rest his hand on Ludwig's neck.

It took a while of prodding and coddling, a little glaring here and there, but eventually, as he ran a thumb over the back of Ludwig's neck, the motions he made seemed to break through.

A shallow sigh, the same that Ludwig gave when he woke up in the morning, and then a short shake of his head.

Ludwig looked over at him, and Magnus could see in his half-smile that he was Ludwig again.

A long silence, as Ludwig looked around, and it was obvious that he was completely unaware of how he had wound up here at the table. He furrowed his brow and lowered his eyes in thought.

Magnus quickly distracted him from his confusion by leaning forward to kiss his cheek, because seeing Ludwig look like that was pretty disheartening.

Ludwig's eyes settled upon him, Magnus' hand still on the back of his neck, and the strange smile turned into a real one as he glanced towards the rising sun.

"You're up early."

Magnus smiled, and said, "Guess you're rubbin' off on me."

Ludwig was very much Ludwig when he cracked a self-conscious smile and turned his eyes to the table below, and Magnus felt his chest puff out in pride, in his ability to be able to get Ludwig back. Couldn't shake his beam, and he ran his hand up the back of Ludwig's neck and into his hair.

Ludwig seemed content to let him do as he would.

Ah, hell, he was sure then that he loved this man.

Ludwig might have been a psycho to some people, but Magnus saw him as little less than perfect.

Crazy was better.

The morning went by too fast, and they set out again.

The day felt like every one before it, but this time, as they passed a stretch of payphones in a small city, Ludwig hung back a little and looked at them.

Magnus glanced back in time to see him wandering over to one, digging in his pocket for change.

What now?

He didn't like distractions, especially ones that took attention off of him and onto something else.

"What are you doing?" he asked, and Ludwig sent him a quick lift of his head.

"I'm just gonna call my brother, so he'll know I'm alright. He's probably stopped by to check on me. He knows by now that I'm not there. I should let him know where I am."

Irritation.

This damn brother was starting to be a pain in his ass.

Maybe Ludwig not remembering waking up that morning had rattled him a little, and he wanted to speak to his brother for reassurance.

So Magnus stood there, and watched Ludwig punching in numbers.

Ludwig was smiling at first, when the call was answered, but he barely got past the first 'hello' before his face started steadily falling, and it didn't stop from there.

Even from where he stood, Magnus could hear Ludwig's brother screeching.

'The fuck have you been?' no doubt.

Minutes that felt like hours, as Ludwig whispered and shuffled under the voice on the other side of the phone, and Magnus could feel his stomach squirming.

Somehow, he could already sense that Ludwig was backing down for the second time.

When Ludwig set the phone down again, there was a long hesitation, and then a look of resignation.

Magnus didn't want him to say it.

They had only been wandering for hardly two weeks. He had wanted to make it years.

He reached down, grabbed Ludwig's hand, and tried to tug him onward so that Ludwig wouldn't have time to say anything.

No go.

As he had once before, Ludwig stood strong and didn't budge.

Magnus looked back again, and could already feel his chest tightening.

"Come on. We've still got a long way to go."

"I can't," Ludwig suddenly said. "I have to go back. Roderich and Gilbert want me to try some new meds."

Magnus stood still for a second, and then asked, a bit curiously, "Who are they? Are they in your head, too?"

Ludwig threw back his head, and laughed.

"I hope not! 'Cause then I really am crazy! Gilbert's my brother. Roderich's kinda like my guardian, I guess. He's not my dad, but he raised me."

"Oh."

Automatically, he decided he didn't like Roderich and Gilbert.

"I don't think you need medicine," he said, irritably. "I like you the way you are."

Fuckin' Christ, hadn't they had this conversation already?

Or maybe he had had that conversation with Alfred.

Didn't matter; he didn't want Ludwig to leave.

"I promised them, though. I owe it to them." Ludwig lowered his chin a little in either guilt or submission, and added, gently, "I still wanna go with you, you know. But, I should go home first. Say! Why don't you come with me? Maybe we can find some medicine for you, too. You can stay with me, and then we can start off again when I'm alright."

Medicine. That's what it was always about.

His entire life, everyone had told him he needed medicine. Long days, spent in corners as his mother whispered with teachers and doctors and lawyers in hushed tones. So many nights listening to her crying when she thought he was gone. Every time she had looked at him and said, 'They want me to drug you, but there's nothing wrong you, there's not.'

There had been something wrong with him, he knew that now, but she had loved him all the same. Why couldn't Ludwig's brother, and why couldn't Ludwig love him as he was?

Why did medication always seem to come up in conversation?

The anger came up in a flash, like it always did. And, like always, he did and said things he didn't mean to.

"So take it then!" he shrieked, as he reached out and punched the newspaper stand beside of him, shattering the glass with his fist. "Just go and take their fuckin' pills, and when they've got ya locked up in some padded room or you're so drugged that you can't even walk, don't wonder how ya got there, 'cause I told ya all along not to take any of that shit! I don't get you! You don't look stupid, so why are you actin' that way?"

Ludwig didn't say a word, but Magnus was pretty sure that something dark had shifted across his face.

The shatter of the glass had flipped something, maybe.

Too angry to dwell much on it, Magnus kicked the stand over, papers fell into the street, people stopped walking and started looking at them, and Magnus kicked the fallen stand over and over again just because he could.

He was crazy, alright.

Always had been, but at least he knew better than to let them turn him into a phantom.

Didn't Ludwig get it?

"Go and take it, and see what I care! I went back and got'cha because I thought you were smart enough to know better, but I guess not! Go on, then! Why are you still standin' here, huh? You said you wanted to go, so go! I don't need you, I'll go by myself. But don't come lookin' for me when you figure out that you've fucked up! Everything that was ever good about ya will be gone the first time you swallow it!"

His hand hurt.

"You're stupid! You're really stupid! Go on, get outta here! Go home to your brother!"

When his rampage was over, the newspaper stand was strewn all over the sidewalk, his hand was bleeding, people were staring, and broken glass crunched under his boots.

If more objects had been in reach, he would have broken them, too.

The silence seemed unbearable, even in the bustling street.

The shadow on Ludwig's face was out for all to see.

Magnus came down from his cloud of rage just in time to catch glimpse of that frightening expression.

Ludwig sent him an uncharacteristically foul look, brow so low that it forced his eyes to a squint, and this time when he spoke, his voice had gotten lower somehow rather than higher.

Hardly more than a dangerous rumble.

"You're a real son of a bitch, you know? The hell's the matter with ya, huh? You're the stupid one, actin' like a fuckin' kid!"

Maybe he had hurt Ludwig's feelings, somewhere in there.

He felt so tired, suddenly.

The anger was gone only to be replaced with regret.

Shouldn't'a called Ludwig stupid. He hadn't meant to say that.

It was Magnus' job to pitch fits, but Ludwig suddenly snarled and kicked the fallen stand just as Magnus had, he started screaming, and Magnus knew right off that Ludwig was gone.

"Who do you think you are? You're nobody to me! I was never asking ya what you thought! I don't need you tellin' me what I can and can't do, and I never asked you for your goddamn opinion, anyway! You—!"

Ludwig trailed off into incomprehensible sputters, too angry to form words, and Magnus could only stand there and stare at him as he kicked the metal again.

Not Ludwig.

Not Alfred. Probably not Berwald, either.

Ludwig was endlessly patient, Alfred was friendly, Berwald was gentle, and this man looked ready to punch him in the face any second now.

Unpredictable, and maybe a little violent.

Actually, it was six seconds later, to be exact, that Ludwig jumped over the stand, pulled back his fist, and punched Magnus square in the face.

Hard.

Ludwig had probably been aiming for his eye, but his fist was so damn big that it took out his nose, too.

What a fuckin' punch!

Magnus fell backwards under the blow, head spinning, and when he came back to his senses, he was sitting in the street, hand holding his nose, and staring at Ludwig's back as he stalked towards a bus stop.

He was too stunned then to actually get up, even though he knew he should have, because surely someone had called the cops already.

A second later, Ludwig got on the bus, stomping angrily, and Magnus was left behind in the street.

It wasn't the punch that had him dazed.

Ludwig was gone.

The only person since his mother had died that had paid any attention to him.

Rejection? Didn't take that well. Giving up? Nope. Taking a hint? Absolutely not.

And Ludwig or whoever might have meant that punch as a 'never talk to me again', but Magnus still straightened up, set his shoulders, and took a breath.

Stubborn.

After a while, he found himself walking again, wiping blood from his nose as he stalked down the street.

Like the day he had left the institution, his feet seemed to take him back in the same direction he had come from, and straight towards Ludwig.