Suddenly, Everything's Okay

It was the second year of college for the five of them. They were attending a cheap university in Boulder Colorado. It was actually going well. Aside from the fact that Kenny sometimes couldn't make his part of the rent, and Kyle always had to bail him out. But he didn't seem to mind. Or at least, He didn't comment about it. Kenny and Kyle were sharing an apartment in the dorms. Stan and Butters were sharing the other apartment. The boys had gotten rid of Cartman after high school graduation. The boy didn't apply himself in school much and so decided he was going to go straight to work. Luckily for them all. So, there they were, entering their second year of college.

"Hey, Ken." Kyle said smiling as he saw the blond youth entering the living room. He smiled drowsily at Kyle. "You been up long?" he asked.

"I got up at five in the morning." Kyle said smiling.

"Kyle…, it's summer time, and you have a week left of vacation." Kenny said as he looked at the clock. "Why are you so early to rise?" he asked.

"Because I'm trying to get used to it." Kyle said smiling. "I haven't made breakfast. Wanted to wait for you to be up." He explained.

"Okay." Kenny said as he plopped down on the couch beside Kyle. "Did we get the TV guide yet?" he asked.

Kyle handed him the item, and smiled. "What d'yuh want for breakfast?" he asked.

"Just whip something up." Kenny said as he flipped through the pages. "Yes Man is on today for the billionth time." He explained.

Kyle headed into the kitchen as he continued his conversation with Kenny. He sighed. He really did like college. He hated growing up, but he liked college a lot. He was happy.

Breakfast was ready on the table in half an hour. Kenny and Kyle sat down to eat. Kenny felt happy too. He liked the memories he was creating. He had never had this kind of stability at his house. Kevin was taking care of Karen, so he didn't worry. He was grateful that Kyle wanted to room with him. He enjoyed the time they spent together, whether it was with Stan and Butters, or anyone else. But he especially treasured the moments like these. Moments where he could almost feel like he was part of a real family. Where he could pretend that Kyle was his brother.

He hated to admit it, but he skipped out on the rent on purpose sometimes. He loved being scolded by Kyle about not being able to pay the rent, only for Kyle to pay it for him anyway. Kenny would give him the amount for the rent the next month, plus the rent he had skipped out on. Kyle would then feel guilty about yelling at Kenny, and Kenny would get a really nice meal cooked for him. He didn't want Kyle to ever find out that he had skipped out on the rent on purpose.

"Kyle you're a great cook." Kenny said grinning at Kyle as he downed his second glass of milk.

"Thanks." Kyle said smiling. "I never cooked at home. So I'm glad I could learn and be of some help to us both. If neither of us knew how to cook, we'd be stuck eating out every day." He said smiling.

"What are we doin' today?" Kenny asked as he continued eating his food.

"I don't know. I swore we were going to make a big deal out of this weekend, since next weekend we'll be getting ready for school." He said bitterly. "But now that this weekend is here, I have no plans." He said as he finished his plate of food.

"Hey, if you're getting up, can I get like…, another glass of milk?" Kenny asked grinning.

"Fine." Kyle grunted grumpily.

"Thank you, Kylee." Kenny said smirking.

Ken always called him that when he wanted to make the youth blush. Sure enough, it worked. He smiled to himself, as Kyle turned his back on him to get the milk.

"We should go down to the strip joint in Denver." Kenny said smiling. "Pound down a few brews."

"No!" Kyle shouted bitterly. "We're not even twenty-one yet, Kenny!" he shouted.

"Live a little, Kyle." Kenny said grinning. "If you want, we can invite the others, and just have us a bash here." He said grinning.

"I'll let you know by this afternoon." Kyle said bitterly. "Let's just bask in the fact that we woke up, and wait for a while to get started on stuff." Kyle said as he handed Kenny his milk. "Next time, you get your own milk, buddy." He spat bitterly.

The rest of the morning was spent eating a few bites here and there. Watching Cartoons. Reading a book. Kyle's idea of a good time. Kenny jumped in the shower at about eleven. He felt unclean for some reason. Halfway through his shower, he heard Kyle come in. Kyle was singing some Hebrew song, and Kenny didn't say anything. He didn't want to interrupt. He just listened. Kyle started brushing his teeth. He was lost in his own little world, and Kenny didn't want to pull him out of it. There was a strange beauty about seeing that red head, not worry about anything for once. Whether Kenny wanted to admit it or not, there was a nice quality to Kyle. Kenny didn't see that quality in any other boy, or girl for that matter.

He finished his shower, and heard Kyle start to relieve himself. Kenny opened the curtain, and grabbed a towel. He dried himself off, and stepped out of the tub, and into his shoes. He traipsed off to his room, and started to get dressed. He left his door open. Kyle wouldn't be awkward about it, or he would say so. Kyle was blunt about things he wasn't happy with. To his friends, and to his family. Kenny grabbed his IPhone, and went to the living room. He plugged it into the speakers they used for the TV, and started playing Jack Johnson. He walked into the kitchen, and started doing the dishes. Kyle hadn't asked him to, but Kenny felt he owed it to his friend. Kyle came in, and smiled.

"Need help?" he asked.

"No, Kyle. It's fine." Kenny said. He felt a giddiness that he couldn't explain.

He was doing the dishes. He was doing something that hopefully would make Kyle proud. He was happy with himself. Maybe Kyle was happy too.

Kyle started on mopping the kitchen, which hadn't been cleaned in a week. He groaned as he spotted something out of the ordinary. Kenny turned around with a sopy dish in his hands, to see what was going on.

"That's where that went!" Kenny exclaimed as he found the half-eaten doughnut in Kyle's hands. Kyle had just retrieved it from on top of the refrigerator.

"Eeeeeeww, Kenny!" Kyle shouted. "I can't believe you. That's really gross." He muttered.

"Oh, Kyle. I'm sorry." Kenny said as he turned around and started cleaning the dishes once again.

"Ugh. I hate how messy you can be." Kyle groaned.

"Aw, but you must not hate it that bad. You had a choice of random roommate assignment, and you chose me." Kenny said grinning.

Stan and Butters were the two in the clique who had girlfriends. Stan was going out with Wendy, and Butters was going out with Lisa. He had straightened himself out, and was actually not a shallow person anymore. Lisa had straightened out considerably, too. Wendy and she were roommates, so Stan and Butters had chosen each other as roommates, too. They said it only fit.

"What in the hell is this?" Kyle moaned as he was looking in the freezer.

"What now, Broflovski?" Kenny asked as he put the last dish in the dish drainer. He dried his hands off on the dish towel, and went to see what the big fuss was about.

"What is this…, doing in the freezer?" Kyle shouted as he pulled out a copy of The Shining for Kenny to see.

"Oh. Sorry. I left it in there. I never had the balls to get it." Kenny said grinning.

"Why?" Kyle moaned as he closed the freezer door.

"Because I got scared. I read through it a month and a half ago, when you were staying with your parents for a weekend. I figured, if I put it in the freezer, there was no way that any of the characters could come and get me. I was a little drunk, and I had gotten really scared." Kenny explained.

"You are something else." Kyle muttered as he stared at the boy. "I really wonder about you, sometimes, Kenny." Kyle said as he looked at the cover of the book. "Is this even that scary?" he asked.

"You've never read the story of…, The Shining?" Kenny asked shivering. "Whoa. You are really behind the times, Kyle. Cartman even read it." He muttered bitterly.

"I'll have to sit down, then, and read it." Kyle said as he stared at the book. He flipped to the book jacket, and read. "It doesn't sound that bad." He said as he closed the book.

"Fine." Kenny said as he smirked at Kyle. "Read it, Kyle. Read it, and I'll be really surprised if you really don't get scared." He said bitterly.

"Fine." Kyle said as he stared down at the book in his hand.

There was a knock on the door. Kenny walked past Kyle, and opened the door. Butters and Stan stood there, staring down at the ground. They were both trying to keep from yawning. Kenny let them in.

"Dude, it's nearly two in the afternoon." Kyle explained as Kenny turned Jack Johnson off. "What are you both doing just waking up at this hour?" he asked.

"Give them a break." Kenny said as he plopped himself down on one of the couches. "I remember once I got up at like seven in the evening." He said grinning.

"We were up all night." Butters said bitterly. "The next door neighbors invited us to play a game of Beer Pong." He muttered. "Stan got drunk as all hell, and I accidentally drank way too much coffee." Butters said sighing.

"Do you have any seven up?" Stan asked softly.

"I'll go get you some from the store." Kyle said as he got his coat on. "Be back in fifteen minutes." He said as he left.

"James and Derek are crazy." Kenny said grinning. "Why were you over there, Butters?" Kenny asked.

"I wanted to make sure Stan was okay." Butters said softly. "Uh…, I'm a dork, ain't I, Kenny?" he asked as he hung his head.

"No, kid. You're a friend." Kenny said grinning. "Just don't let it be a habit, Stan." He said as he clapped his hands together loudly in Stan's ear.

"Dude!" Stan moaned. "Fuck off!"

The door opened, and Wendy and Lisa came in. Wendy was angry, and Lisa just smiled shyly. Wendy closed the door as she sat down next to Kenny.

"Hey, Butters." Lisa said softly.

"Hey, darlin'." Butters said as they both sat down in the bean bag chair in the corner.

"I hope it was worth it, Stanley." Wendy said bitterly.

"I…, ugh, Wendy, it wasn't worth it, okay?" he asked bitterly.

"You ready for tonight?" Kenny asked. "Because you're going to do the same thing tonight, Stanny Boy." He said grinning.

"No, Kenny, he is not." Wendy said bitterly.

"Hell yeah he is. Butters, you're going to join us, too. This is the last weekend we have before school, and we're going to make a hell of a weekend out of it." Kenny said grinning.

"Sweet!" Stan said as he perked up. "We are going to have a fun time."

"No, we're not." Kyle said as he entered the house. He closed the door. "Stan, you need to recover from your hang over." He said as he handed Stan the soda. "I got you some seltzer water for your stomach." He added.

"How did you know?" Stan asked bitterly.

"He lives with me." Kenny spoke as he smiled at Kyle. "Hang over cures are regularly needed over here." He said as he started snickering.

"Thank you, Kyle." Wendy said as she smiled at him. "You're a life saver." She said sighing. "We should be going to the store, you guys, and doing our school shopping. You are not telling me you're going to go with the same wardrobes you had last year?" she asked.

"I'm going to need some help." Lisa said softly.

"I've got you taken care of, Lisa." Wendy said sighing. She had been a real help in improving Lisa's image.

"All I'm saying is," Kenny said as he tried to bring the conversation back to where he knew mattered more. "we have to make this weekend count. It is, after all, the last free weekend." He explained. "Next weekend, we can do our shopping, and all that. But seriously, we need to make something of this one." He explained.

"I think Stanley already had his party." Wendy said bitterly.

"Look, let's decide on something." Kenny said as he looked at the boys. "You girls don't even have to come with us." He explained.

"Oh, come on." Lisa said bitterly. "You're going to exclude us, just because we're girls?" she asked bitterly as she glared at Kenny. "Butters, it's either me, or your guy friends." She said adamantly.

"No!" Stan shouted as he drank his drink. "Let's all do something really special together." He said as he tried to think. "If Wendy, Kyle and Lisa don't want alcohol, then, fine. But let's not split the gang up." He said as he tried to think. His hang over was preventing that.

"I got an idea." Butters said as he thought about it. "Let's go have a barbecue at the lake." He said smiling. "We can't go to the beach, but let's go to the lake. It's clean enough to swim in, for those of us who want to swim. And we can invite other people to go along." He said as he stood up and started pacing.

"I'll Facebook everyone about it." Wendy said as she took out her phone. "Let's all get whatever we're going to take with us, and meet here, at three. We'll make our way to the lake, and be there with enough time to still have sun to play in." she said as they all stood up.

"Sounds good." Stan said as he stood, too. "Butters, come with me, and we'll get stuff for the barbecue." He ordered.

"Kenny and I'll get the food." Kyle said as he looked over at Kenny.

"Lisa and I'll go get blankets, and get the big cooler ready for use." Wendy said as they all filed out of the house. The door closed behind Kyle, as he stood facing Kenny in their living room.

"We wanted to have a big end of summer blow out." Kenny said as he tried not to get angry. "And a barbecue is what we come up with?" he asked. "Really? No blowing things up, no parallel universes, no trip to Canada?" he wondered. "Kyle? Are we losing our touch?" he asked.

"I think a barbecue is perfect." Kyle said as he started putting his car keys in his pocket.

"I don't even know you anymore." Kenny moaned softly.

Two hours later found the six of them, and about twenty or so other guys and girls from their college gathered around the grill at the lake. There was no one there, but them. So it was pretty good. They actually were having a good time. Until Stan got the beers out.

The party went well into the evening, and crossed over into the night. At eleven in the evening, the people all retired to their respective homes. Stan, Kyle, Kenny and Butters went to Kyle's apartment, and continued the party there. Wendy and Lisa didn't much feel like staying and watching them all drink themselves silly, so they decided it was time to go home, and turn in. No one made fun of them or anything. By the end of the night, Kyle was the only one not drunk.

The boys decided it would be nice to watch a movie. So, they ended up watching the entire Saw series. It was about six in the morning, when the group split up, and Kenny and Kyle were left alone.

"I had fun." Kyle said grinning. "I don't know when I'll wake up, but I had fun." He said as he locked the door.

"You're not…, scared…, are you?" Kenny asked softly.

"Not really. If you ask me, the movie sound effects, and visual effects were lame." Kyle said bitterly. "It was all kind of a waste of time for me." he said as he turned off the TV.

"Good." Kenny said as he drunkenly started heading to his room. "I'll see yuh later." He slurred. "Don't wake me up, er nuthin'." He muttered.

"Kay." Kyle said as he walked into his own room.

He laid down on his bed, pulled his covers over him, and closed his eyes. He felt exhausted. He just wanted nothing more than to sleep. He was happy about last night. It had been fun.

The next time Kenny opened his eyes, the clock read four thirty in the afternoon. He sighed. He looked at his phone. Ten missed calls from Wendy. Two from Lisa. He sighed. He was tired, and his head hurt a little. But other than that, he was okay. He stepped out into the living room, and saw Stan and Butters each lying on a couch.

"How'd you guys get in here?" Kenny asked as he looked at them.

"I made a copy of the key." Stan informed.

"Eeeeeeww." Kyle said as he followed Kenny into the living room. "I thought for sure that Kenny was over here with you guys when I heard the TV go on." He said as he tried not to yawn.

"I want food." Kenny explained.

"I want aspirin." Stan muttered.

The door knob rattled, and there was a pair of knocks on the door. Kenny opened the door, and saw Lisa and Wendy standing there.

"About time." Wendy muttered. "Lisa and I already did all our shopping." She said as she pushed her way in.

"Ugh." Stan moaned. "Wendy, it's too soon for your cheerfulness." He muttered.

"You shouldn't have stayed up so late." Lisa said as she ruffled Butters hair.

"Yeah, yeah." Stan said as he sighed. "Anyone else want seven up?" he asked bitterly.

"Yes." Butters and Kenny both moaned.

Soon, everyone was sitting down to eat in the dining room. Kenny smiled at all of his friends, as he started eating.

The next couple of days were uneventful. Since the gang had grown up, every time Kenny died, there was no one around hardly anymore. Death seemed to strike when Kenny was alone now. So whenever he died, he had no one around to yell about how they had killed him, and shout, you bastards. But it didn't matter. Kenny knew no one would ever remember what happened, even if they were around. He much preferred dying alone. At least he could pretend that the reason they didn't remember now was because none of them had been around when he died. He felt better about that. He sighed as he awoke in his bed the next morning. He didn't know how special it was going to be. He heard a soft series of sobs coming from somewhere beside him. Kyle was crying. Kyle was lying beside Kenny, on the bed. He touched Kyle's shaking shoulder. He gasped.

Kyle stopped crying, and looked up at Kenny. He stared. He just stared for the longest time. He shrank away from Kenny. He didn't know what to say.

"You…, you're dead." He whispered. "This isn't happening. You're dead." He whispered.

"No, I'm right here." Kenny said as he reached out to touch Kyle.

Kyle's hand fell gently into Kenny's. Kyle just stared. "But…, you're dead. I know you are." He whispered. "I know you are! This is not happening. I fell asleep. I'm dreaming!" he whispered softly.

"Kyle, you're very much awake." Kenny said as he stared at Kyle's shocked green eyes.

"But, this is not possible." Kyle whispered.

"Kyle this happens all the time." Kenny said bitterly. "I die all the time. And no one remembers. Somehow, I figured if you ever remembered, It would be a lot more special than this." He said bitterly. "I hate to see you so terrified that I'm alive." He confessed.

"But Kenny, this defies all logic! All reality! This is not supposed to be happening! They were supposed to send you back to your parents so you can be buried!" Kyle gasped. "I got off with the police two and a half hours ago." Kyle whispered as he took his phone from the bed side table. He looked at the call log. "Kenny, the calls are gone!" he gasped.

"Kyle, this happens all the time. I assure you, there is no need for alarm." He said bitterly. "Just go to sleep. Maybe you'll forget when you wake up again." He said bitterly as he tried not to let that get him down.

"But…"

"Go sleep, Kyle." Kenny said as he sat up. "I'll make breakfast." He volunteered.

"No!" Kyle shrieked. "Stay with me." he whispered.

"Fine." Kenny said as he lay back down. He pulled the covers over them both, and closed his eyes.

Kyle's thin arms wrapped around Kenny's waist, and Kenny wrapped him up as well. Kenny felt like he had just finished drinking a glass of hot chocolate. He felt really warm, and his chest felt hot, as if the liquid was running down his insides. He liked this feeling. He was holding Kyle.

When they awoke next, Kyle was staring at Kenny. The look in his eyes told Kenny that Kyle hadn't forgotten. He sighed. He thought somehow that it would be a lot more…, happy. Or even less serious. Somehow more comical. But Kyle was a serious person. He had some imagination, but he didn't believe in ghosts, or paranormal things. He didn't believe in hauntings. He didn't believe Damien was the son of the Devil. He didn't believe in anything that threatened to break his hold on reality. Kenny somehow found himself wishing Butters or even Stan had been the ones to witness Kenny come back to life. He sighed. He didn't know what to do to make the boy feel better. Knowing Kyle, Kenny knew Kyle was going to spend tons of time researching the subject of Kenny's immortality. He would try one way or another, to make sense of all of this. He would.

When they made their way out to the living room, Stan and Wendy were sitting in the bean bag chair. The TV was on, and they both looked like they were having a conversation.

"This is getting strange." Kyle said bitterly. "I mean, it's one thing to come during the day, but to get here even before we wake up in the morning?" he asked.

"I'll help you cook." Wendy said as she and Kyle made their way to the kitchen. "Lisa and Butters wanted to borrow the apartment." Wendy informed.

"So why didn't Stan and you hang out at your apartment?" Kenny asked as he grabbed the TV guide from the coffee table.

"I didn't think we had to." Stan said as he stared at the TV screen. "You guys have the biggest TV out of all of us." He added grinning. "How do you expect me to go back to watching television on a dumb thirty-two inch, when there's a fifty two inch TV right here?" he asked bitterly.

Kenny and Stan were sitting outside in the driveway. Kyle was alone in the apartment, on the seventh floor. Butters was still with Lisa, and Wendy said she was going to visit her mom. Kenny and Stan were fixing Stan's car in the parking lot.

"You gay?" Stan asked, making Kenny drop the screws he was supposed to be holding.

"Dude, be careful. We need those." Stan said bitterly as he heard the screws drop.

"What kind of question is that?" Kenny asked bitterly.

"Well, Wendy walked in, and Kyle and you were lying together." Stan said bitterly. "Kyle is my best friend, Kenny, and you've been known to…, experiment with all the girls in our class." Stan muttered bitterly. "Rumor has it, the guys, too." He said bitterly.

"No. Not the guys." Kenny said grinning. "Apparently, I have Standards. That surprised even me, when I got asked if I would sleep with Craig." Kenny said grinning. "But walking in and seeing Kyle and I lying together doesn't mean I'm gay." Kenny said bitterly.

"Well, let me warn you, Kenny. Kyle is my best friend. I mean, you're my best friend, too, but Kyle _is gay." Stan said bitterly. "So, if you hurt him, and/or lead him on, I'm going to kick your ass." Stan said as he started fixing his car again.

"Stanley, I don't want Kyle that way." Kenny said bitterly. "I don't see him that way. I mean, I really don't." he said bitterly. "He had a bad dream, and I was comforting him." Kenny explained. "Wait!" he gasped. "How do you know he's gay?" he asked. "He's never told us that!" he shouted.

"That doesn't matter, right now!" Stan said defensively. "We're talking about you, not Kyle." He said as he started screwing in a bolt.

"Stan, tell me what happened." Kenny said angrily. "We're supposed to be best friends. If you don't tell me what happened, I will go confront Kyle myself." He said as he stood up.

"I read his diary, okay?" Stan said as he too stood up. "He hasn't told me anything."

"Stanley Marsh." Kenny gasped in a serious whisper. "How could you?" he gasped.

"Well!" Stan shouted trying to find a defense. "He left it at my apartment like six weeks ago!" shouted Stan. "I put it back in his room!" he shouted.

"Oh, my, God." Kenny gasped. "What else do you know?" he gasped.

"He has a crush on you." Stan said bitterly. "Ever since pre-school. He just never knew what it was until graduation."

"I don't wanna know anymore." Kenny said bitterly. "Shut up, Stanley, shut up. This is Kyle's thoughts, you invaded." Kenny said as he stared at his best friend with a blank stare.

"You're not going to tell him…, are you?" Stan asked bitterly.

"Tell who, what?"

Kenny and Stan both let out screams as Kyle came up behind him. Kenny just about peed his pants. He didn't know what to say. "Bebe cheated on Clyde." Stan said bitterly. "I found out, and I can't go to any of them with it." He muttered. "So, I told Kenny." He said softly. "But Kenny, you can't tell." He said as a pleading look came over his face.

"I won't tell." Kenny said as he stared Stan in the eyes. "But promise me this won't happen again."

"I swear, Kenny, on our super best friendship." Stan said as he linked pinkies with Kenny.

"Stan, don't." Kenny said as he retreated. If they had a super best friendship, Stan wouldn't have been able to do that to Kyle. He sighed. What was he going to do?

"You guys want food?" Kyle asked. He didn't even seem interested in the boys' gossip.

"You made food already?" Kenny asked surprised.

"Yep." Kyle said as he lead the boys into the building. They walked up to the elevator, and pushed the button. The elevator came up to them in a few minutes, and a whole crowd of people got out. Kenny sighed. He hoped the other elevator wasn't broken. Stan scanned his wallet, and the card reader beeped. He sighed as he hit seven, and the boys all went up. It stopped on five.

"We're going up." Kenny said to the girl who was staring intently at them. "Sorry." He said as the door closed.

When they got to Kyle and Kenny's apartment, the silence was still there. Stan was thinking about his problems, and Kyle was thinking about Kenny's deaths.

"For heaven's sake, it's like someone died in here." Kenny shouted as he stared at Kyle and Stan pointedly.

"Can't we have bad days without being judged?" Kyle asked as he started to cry. He ran to his room, and closed and locked the door.

"I hate my life." Kenny moaned as he looked over at Stan.

"Let's order take out." Stan muttered as he looked at Kenny pleadingly.

"No. That Chinese food place down stairs has chicken that tastes like fish every time." Kenny muttered. "They even put it in the pot stickers." He mumbled as he pretended to throw up.

"Let's get pizza, then." Stan said bitterly.

The door opened, and Wendy came walking in with Lisa and Butters. She was carrying a bag in her hands.

"Saved by the girls." Stan said as he looked at her. "What's in there?" he asked.

"I bought some food to make over here. I made sure it follows Kyle's diet needs." She said as she started unpacking the stuff.

"You guys mind taking care of things?" Kenny asked softly. "I have to go see if Kyle is okay." He said as he looked over at Kyle's room door.

"Sure, Ken." Lisa said as she looked at the clock. "Just make sure you guys come for dinner." She muttered.

Kenny knocked on Kyle's door. "Go away." Kyle shot angrily. Kenny turned the knob, and the door opened. "I said go away!" Kyle shouted.

"I pay rent here, Mister!" Kenny shouted as he closed the door. "I think I should be allowed in here."

Kyle didn't say anything. He was lying on his bed, and tears were falling onto his pillow. Ken sat down beside Kyle.

"Kyle?" he said softly. "What's going on with you?" he asked.

"I don't know." Kyle said bitterly. "I have no clue. You're supposed to be dead, Kenny. I know you are. I'm not crazy, I wrote it all down. I know you died a couple days ago." He whispered.

"Kyle, why can't you just be happy I'm alive, and forget about it?" Kenny whispered as he took Kyle in his arms.

"Because, what else is messed up in the world? What if Tweek really does have under pants gnomes that are after more than just his underwear? What if I really am not alive?" Kyle asked as he tried to figure himself out. "What if I really am a figment of someone else's imagination? What if I live at this stupid college, alone? What if no one wanted to room with me, so I made you up?" he asked.

"Kyle, listen to me. My parents…"

Kenny told Kyle the whole story. Kyle found it hard to believe, but he listened, anyway, as Kenny told him the story. It wasn't long, before Kyle had stopped crying.

"I want you to just put it out of your mind." Kenny said softly. "It happened, and you remember, and I really am glad that you do. But it's tearing you apart, and I don't like that." He said as he ruffled Kyle's hair. "Just forget about it." He said bitterly.

"How many times has it happened, Kenny?" Kyle said softly.

"All my life." Kenny said without hiding the fact. "Since I was three." He said making Kyle jump. "I have died over a thousand times." He muttered.

"Is that orange jacket tied to this somehow?" Kyle asked softly.

"No. I just love this jacket." Kenny said smirking.

"Well, at least you're okay." Kyle said softly. "But it's impossible." He said as he looked up at Kenny. "But I wrote it down. I know I'm not crazy." He whispered.

"Wendy and Lisa are cooking down in the kitchen." Kenny said softly. "I think we should go join them." He explained as he hugged Kyle. "C'mon." he said as they pulled apart.

Kenny saw Kyle's journal lying open on the night stand. Kyle was already out his bedroom door, and Kenny was staring at the page it was open to.

He finally started taking his hood off. I can't believe it. He looks like an angel. He has the most amazing face. It's like he's sad, and happy, and hurt all at once. Looking into those eyes makes me want to just kiss him. But I can't ever tell him. I hate being Jewish.

Kenny walked out of the room, not wanting to read anymore. He hated how dirty he felt just looking at that one paragraph. He sighed. He had to straighten this all out.

The rest of the week was uneventful. Nothing too crazy happened. Kenny didn't die again, and Kyle didn't mention the deaths. He did, however, finish the shining. He said it was actually one of the more gruesome books he's ever read. He was really relieved he had finished it. He hoped he never had to read it again.

"We should watch the movie." Ken said as he and Kyle started getting ready for dinner. It was Friday night.

"Gross!" Kyle shouted as he shivered. "There's a movie?" he asked.

"Yes." Kenny said grinning. "But I didn't like it." He said sighing. "They didn't do a good job of it at all." he said.

"Ugh. Don't tell me." Kyle said as the door opened.

"Don't cook!" Stan shouted as he came walking in.

"Why?" Kyle moaned.

"We got City Wok." Butters said as he set a bag on the dining room table.

"Whoa." Kenny gasped. "How?" he asked.

"We went to South Park to see our families." Stan said as he started taking out all the food.

"Lisa's staying the night at her parent's house." Butters informed. "So, Wendy's the only one who's with us." he explained.

Wendy came walking in and slammed the door shut. She was carrying a bucket of ice cream. She quickly put it in the freezer, and slammed the door shut.

"You guys hungry?" she asked.

"Hell yeah." Kenny said as he and the rest started dishing themselves the food.

Five minutes later, they were all eating around the table. There was an empty spot where Lisa would be, but there was not that much of a difference. She would be with them soon. The conversation shifted from school, to the size of the apartments.

"Well, you guys did get lucky." Stan was saying as he ate. "You did get the big apartment." He said bitterly.

"No, dude. The apartments are the same size." Kyle spoke as he put an egg roll to his mouth.

"No. We actually do have the bigger of the apartments." Kenny said bitterly. "But for four fifty a month, it actually is a good size." He said as he stuffed a pot sticker into his mouth. Soy sauce started dripping down his arm.

"How much do you pay?" Wendy asked.

"I pay two twenty five a month." Butters informed.

"See? We pay more." Kenny said as he swallowed.

"I don't think you finished chewing that last bit." Kyle said snickering. "It looked like it hurt going down."

"I am hungry all right?" Kenny said bitterly.

"You guys really lucked out though." Butters said as he wiped his mouth on a napkin.

"We should play a game." Kenny said grinning.

"What game?" Wendy asked.

"We should see who knows more about who. Stan and Butters about me and Kyle, or the other way around. If we win, we get to have you guys do our chores for a month." He explained.

"How about we get the big screen?" Stan asked.

"It wouldn't look good in your apartment." Wendy said bitterly. "It's too small."

"If you guys win," Kenny continued. "You get our apartment, and we get yours. Furniture, and all."

"What?" Kyle shrieked. "No way!" he shouted.

"Fine. How about a hundred dollars?" Kenny asked.

"Sounds like a deal." Said Kyle smiling.

"All right. Wendy, go make up questions that we all can answer about each other." Kenny said smiling.

"I don't want to do that." Wendy said bitterly. "I have a life." She glared.

"I'll go get Derek to see if he wants to help." Stan said smiling.

"I want to play!" Wendy shouted as she elbowed Stan. "I'll play. Sheesh." She muttered as she started eating again.

"So, Kyle." Stan said as the group started dishing up ice cream for themselves. "Rumor has it you're gay?" he asked.

"What rumor?" Kenny and Kyle said at the same time.

"Well, he looks like a fag." Stan said bitterly. "I mean, look at him."

"I am not gay." Kyle explained seriously.

"Why don't you have a girlfriend?" Butters asked.

"I don't have a crush on any girl at school." Kyle said bitterly. "I also don't go out much, so I don't get to meet new people and see if I can find a girl that way." He explained.

"I just wondered." Stan said as he started to eat his ice cream.

"Besides," Kyle said bitterly. "my mom and dad don't want a gay son. Ike is adopted, and I have to make them proud." He said bitterly.

"What about what Kyle wants?" Kenny asked as he put down his bowl. He suddenly didn't want any ice cream.

"I already told you. I have to make my parents happy." Kyle muttered as he started eating. "I am not gay." He said bitterly.

"All right." Stan said softly. "I'm sorry I brought it up." He apologized sadly.

"See that you don't do that again." Kyle muttered.

Two hours later, Wendy found herself sitting in the living room, with Stan, Butters Kenny and Kyle. She was really looking forward to this. She smiled.

"I have categorized all the questions into the following. Funny stuff, fears, fact, and random." She said smiling. "Twenty-five questions in a category." She said smiling.

"Cool." Kenny said grinning. "We're going to cream you guys." He said smiling at them.

"Who wants to go first?" Wendy asked smiling at them.

"We should go first." Kyle explained. "This is our house."

"Fine." Butters and Stan said at once.

"Which category?" Wendy asked.

"Fact!" Kyle shouted.

"Okay." Wendy said as she looked down at her paper. "Fact or fiction? Butters has an allergy to Almond. ("Fact!" Kyle shouted as he slammed his fist on the coffee table.) I'm not finished. Fact or fiction? His face is the only thing that swells up during this allergic reaction."

"Fiction." Kenny said calmly. "His tongue swells up, and he also gets these bumps all over his arms." He explained.

"Score." Wendy said as she wrote it down

"Lucky shot." Stan said bitterly. "We're going to cream you guys."

"Pick your category, boys." Wendy said grinning.

"Fears." Stan said looking over at Kenny.

"What is the one thing that Kenny is afraid of most in the whole world?" Wendy asked.

"Uh, uh, that's easy!" Stan shouted. Kyle knew this one. Kenny was afraid one day he would die, and never come back. But he wondered what Kenny had told Wendy.

"Kenny McCormick," Butters spoke up confidently. "is deathly afraid of escalators." He explained.

"Yes!" Wendy and Kenny both said smiling. "Five bonus points if you can tell us why." Wendy added grinning.

"Because they never stop going unless someone turns them off." Butters explained. "And if Kenny ever tripped on one going up, He would never reach the top, but never end up at the bottom, either." He explained.

"They're good." Kenny said as he bit his lip.

"We'll take a question from random stuff." Kyle said as he wiped sweat from his brow.

"What ten items are you most likely to find…, in Butters backpack?" Wendy asked as she looked over at Butters.

"Ooo! Ooo! I know this one!" Kyle shouted as he looked over at the clock. "Apple." He blurted.

"Yes." Butters and Wendy said at once.

"A hello kitty pen." Kenny explained. "Along with two water bottles, and a pencil case, red." He said bitterly.

"The water doesn't count." Wendy said smiling.

"Aw!" Kyle and Kenny groaned.

"A binder, blue, and chap stick…" Kenny was struggling.

"More?" Wendy asked.

"Not really. Kyle?" Kenny looked over at Kyle.

"Um, a paint brush?" Kyle muttered softly.

"Wrong. Since you couldn't answer the question, why don't we pass it to the other team?" she asked smiling. "What are ten most likely items you are able to find…, in Kyle's back pack?" she asked.

"Apple, insulin, water bottle, binder, little journal, tiny bottle of white out, box of highlighters, zip lock bag of assorted nuts, lucky rabbit's foot…" he was struggling.

"Two more, you almost have it." Wendy said as she looked over at Kyle who was shaking.

"Chap stick, and a roll of masking tape." Butters finished.

"Bingo!" Wendy shouted as she wrote it down.

The game kept going on for about forty-five minutes. Soon, the teams were tied. The tension was building up in the room. Kenny was having a blast. So was Wendy, but she didn't seem to show it.

"Well, boys, we ran out of questions." Wendy said smiling. "Sucks, too, cuz we're tied." She said grinning.

"This is lame!" Stan shouted. "I want to win!"

"I did create…, a lightning round, for such an event." Wendy said smiling.

"I'm good at lightning rounds!" Butters gasped.

"Let's spice up the bet!" Stan shouted. "Two hundred dollars!"

"Three fifty!" Kenny shrieked.

"Four seventy five!" Butters yelled.

"Five fifty!" Kenny shouted.

"Stop spending my money!" Kyle shouted as he clapped a hand over Kenny's mouth.

"Let's pull out the big guns." Kenny said bitterly. "I will totally let you guys have this apartment, if you guys win."

"What?" Kyle and the other boys shouted.

"Don't worry, Kyle. We've got this." Kenny said smirking. "How bad could it be?"

"In this round, you have to answer as many questions about the other team as you can." Wendy explained. "In thirty seconds."

"We've got this!" shouted Kenny as he pumped his fist. "We can't possibly lose!"

"I can't believe we lost!" Kyle shouted as he gave Kenny a dirty look. "I can't fucking believe you! If we'd answered that last question, we wouldn't have to do this!" he shouted as he packed his suitcase. "Their TV guide comes to them under Butters name. It comes to them addressed to Leopold Bonaparte." He explained bitterly.

"How was I supposed to know?" Kenny asked as he threw a suitcase on the couch. "I didn't really think they'd make us move out of our home." He muttered.

"I hate you, Kenny." Kyle moaned as he finished packing.

By Sunday evening, Kyle and Kenny were moved into the apartment. Kyle didn't know what to say. So, he didn't.

The previous apartment, had a living room area, a kitchen with a two burner stove, and two small bedrooms. They lived on the seventh floor. Now, they lived on the tenth floor, and they were literally in a closet. There was a kitchenette. It consisted of a mini fridge, a two burner stove, and a sink. There was two cupboards under the counter. One on either side of the fridge. There was another counter, with a microwave, and above it a shelf for dry food.

The apartment they were in before was spacious, and nice. The bathroom had a bath tub, and a sink, and a toilet. This bathroom, had a sliding door, a shower, that one person hardly fit in, and a sink and toilet. The bathroom was right next to the front door. Right next to the kitchenette.

There was no living room and bedrooms. Instead, there was a square that was reserved for furniture, and beds, and other stuff. They were literally in a hole. Kyle was sad. He didn't know what to do. But a bet was a bet.

They went to the dorm advisors and got the paper work filled out, so the rent would be adjusted to what it needed to be.

"You can't possibly skip out on the rent when it's two twenty-five a month." Kyle muttered as he walked over to the window.

"We have a corner room." Kenny said as if that made everything better. "It has two windows." He said bitterly.

"Help me blow up the air mattress." Kyle barked. "I don't want to sleep on cold tiles today." He muttered as he and Kenny got ready to blow up the bed.

The air mattress was a twin. Room enough for Kenny and Kyle to both sleep on it. But they still had to find a better bed. Had to. There was no if ands or buts about it.

There was a noise, and the door knob turned. It opened, and Stan came walking in. He smiled.

"I love what you've done with the place. Butters and I didn't even have an air mattress." He said grinning.

"You didn't have cleanliness, either." Kyle muttered. "I had to poor draino down the drain in the sink in the kitchen hole to get the dish water to drain." Kyle muttered.

"Hey!" Kenny shouted as he grabbed the bag of chips from Stan's hand. He was about to open it. "You guys now have the big apartment. This means you feed us. Not us feed you." He explained.

"What?" Stan squealed.

"Our house is not big enough to hold all this partying. So you guys now, host all major events." Kyle explained.

"So there." Kenny put in grinning.

"I have an arm chair you guys can have." Stan offered.

"And I have a foldable table that you guys can have for homework and stuff." Butters said as he walked in. "I can get it out of storage today if you want." He offered.

"I found two chairs in the garbage room today." Kenny said sighing. "I can haul them over here, and we can set it all up."

The night came sooner than all of them expected. Kyle and Kenny stood back to look at the work they had done. It wasn't so bad. They were actually pretty cozy. But Kyle was angry, and Kenny could tell.

"You're rich enough, Kyle. You can buy back our place." Kenny explained smiling.

"A bet is a bet, Kenny." Kyle muttered as he stared around at their place. "I have to honor that." He spat. "I'm going to bed. I have to be up early tomorrow." He griped.

The next day went by quite slow. It was the first day of classes, first day of fall term. Not much to look forward to. Instructors handing out syllabi and assignments. Introductions. It really wasn't something eventful. The boys all compared schedules. Kenny had one class with Kyle. Weather. He had a history class with Butters, and his last class was with Stan and Lisa. It was a Psychology class. He sighed. He was going to have an okay fall, he supposed.

"I hate this!" Kyle shouted as he sat at the fold up table trying to do his homework. "We actually had a dining room table at our old place!"

"You know, Kyle, I'm really getting sick of your complaining." Kenny said as he stood up from the bed. "I have tried my best," he said as tears welled up in his eyes. "to make this a loving caring home for us! And you don't even acknowledge that!" he shouted. "I've had to put all my effort into making this place look and feel nice, just for you to complain about everything I do." He shot. "I don't feel very good here." He explained. "Not with all your sour attitude."

"You're right, Kenny." Kyle said softly as he stood up and faced his friend. "I need to just suck it up, and get on with my life." He sighed. "But our old place was so nice, and I took it for granted." He moaned.

"Well," Kenny said as he wiped his eyes. "I'm willing to stay here, for the term, and give it a try if you are." He said smiling.

"Okay." Kyle said as he stepped over to Kenny and hugged him. "Thanks for reminding me how a friend should behave." He said as he patted Kenny's shoulder.

The time went on swiftly. Midterms were up on them before they could grasp the subjects completely. Slowly, Kyle distanced himself more and more from his friends. Slowly, Kenny started to notice things about Kyle, that he wouldn't really like to know. Slowly, he started to have a feeling he should confront the red head. Slowly, he crept up on Kyle.

"Aha!" Kenny shouted as he spotted Kyle standing in the bathroom. "I knew it, you dirty Jew!" he shouted making Kyle drop what was in his hand. He grabbed Kyle by the shoulders, and turned him around.

"Let go of me, Kenny." Kyle shouted as his face went red.

"If you don't explain yourself, right now, I'll tell Stan what I saw." Kenny said as he saw the tiny trickle of blood running down his arm. "Talk, Jew." He said as he looked over at Kyle.

"I'm having a lot of trouble in school." Kyle explained. "I'm being bullied, Kenny. Okay, people are picking on me." he said as he started to cry. "I don't know who to go to, and I feel like I'm going to die. I really want to stay…, but I think I'll have to go home after this semester if things don't go up for me." he muttered.

"You think cutting yourself is going to make things go up for you?" Kenny asked softly as he looked at Kyle's face.

"People have a different way of dealing with things!" Kyle said through a sob. "This is just mine!"

"Kyle you idiot! You could get really sick if one of those cuts gets infected. You could really hurt yourself if you hit…, like…, a vein or something." He explained. "Kyle, this needs to stop. Who is bullying you?" he asked.

"Know what, Ken, forget it." Kyle said bitterly as he tried to get out of the bathroom. "Just leave it alone. I can handle it. All right? Just leave it alone." he said as he pushed past Kenny.

"Kyle, come back here!" Kenny shouted as he picked up the bloody butter knife.

He had no idea what he should do. He could just leave it alone, like he had been asked to. That would be respecting his friend's privacy. But he also didn't want Kyle hurt. He cared too much about Kyle to just leave him alone, and let him deal with his problems on his own. He sighed. He had no idea what he was supposed to do.

The term passed slow. Kyle started avoiding his room. He started avoiding all of them all together, and Kenny still hadn't said anything to Stan. He sighed. He didn't know what he was supposed to do. Did he want to turn into Stan and violate his friend's privacy and read his journal? He didn't feel like he had to. He sighed. What should he do?

"Can't you just…, I don't know. Ask him out or something?" Stan asked as they sat in Stan's apartment a week before finals. "It's about to be Christmas break. Why don't you just ask Kyle out?" he asked bitterly.

"He's cutting for me." Kenny said as a wave of sick feelings hit him. "He says he's being bullied, and teased. But honestly, who in their right mind would tease Kyle? He is rich, he looks handsome, and if you need a favor from him, why would you tease him?" Kenny asked. "I know it's because of me." he said bitterly as he tried not to show any emotion.

"You're sure you're not gay, Kenny?" Stan asked as he offered Kenny a cookie.

"I don't know! I mean, dude, I've fooled around with a lot of girls, but come on. I don't really want to explore that side of me. I mean, I really love curves." He said smirking.

"I think you like Kyle." Wendy said from the kitchen.

"Why?" Kenny asked bitterly as he rounded on Wendy.

"Have you paid any attention to any of the girls you date?" Wendy asked laughing. "You never date girls who are tall, like you. You date the short girls. Kenny, you're six feet, and you date the five foot four girls. Kyle is five foot four." She compared.

"That is not proof enough." Stan and Kenny both said at the same time.

"Fine. How about the fact that all the girls Kenny dates are red headed?" Wendy asked grinning. "Lots of girls have asked him out, too. But Kenny loves red headed curly haired girls. Kyle!" Wendy sang triumphantly.

"I am not gay!" Kenny shouted as he started pacing the apartment. "Am I?" he whispered softly.

The week dragged on. Kyle and Kenny were sitting in the apartment the Sunday before finals week started. Kenny looked over at him puzzled.

"You doing all right?" he asked. "We share the same apartment, and it's been ages since I've really talked to you." He lamented softly.

"I know." Kyle said softly. "You're always goofing off, dating girls, and going to parties. I'm off doing my homework, and actually working on my school work. Which is the whole reason we are going to school. It is called school, Kenny." Kyle said smiling at him.

"Hey, bro." Kenny said grinning. "I've actually started doing really good in school ever since the beginning of this year." He said smirking. "I don't even remember you being proud of me when I passed all those midterms." He said as he flicked a lock of Kyle's hair. "I am really trying hard, you know." He said softly. "But no one is trying as hard as you." He said as he reached out and squeezed Kyle's hand.

"I have to hand it to you, Kenny. You did do a good job on your midterms." Kyle said softly. "It's too bad someone…!" he shouted as he looked at Kenny. "Bet our apartment, so we can't put the really nice looking papers up on the refrigerator." Kyle said as he stuck his tongue out at Kenny.

"In some cultures," Kenny said as he leaned over. "That means, kiss me." he said smirking at Kyle. "So don't do that again, or I may just take you up on your offer." He said as he pulled Kyle by the collar of his shirt and into his lap. He was about to kiss him, when he spotted something that stunned him. There were fresh cuts on Kyle's left arm. He looked over at Kyle, and realized Kenny had accidently pulled Kyle out of his jacket sleeve. He would've been able to hide it, if Kenny hadn't jerked him around like that.

"You promised." Kenny whispered as tears filled his eyes.

"What do you care!?" Kyle shouted as he jerked himself out of Ken's grip. "You whore, Kenny McCormick!" he shouted as he ran away.

"At least I don't cut myself!" Kenny shouted as he tried to hold back tears.

"You are the worst person in the world, Kenneth Stuart McCormick!" Kyle shouted as he walked to the door of their studio. "Fuck you, and just fuck you. Fuck you fuck you fuck you! You don't say that to anyone if you want their friendship! Fuck you! I hate you, Kenny and I never want to speak to you again!" Kyle shouted. The door slammed, and he was gone.

Kenny was stunned. He had so not meant to say what he said. He felt like death. He stared. He had not meant a single word of it. Not one. There was a knock at his door. He walked over and opened it.

"Hello." He said as he looked at the RA standing in front of him.

"There was a report that there was a lot of fighting coming from here. You doing all right?" the guy asked.

"Yes." Kenny said softly. "I'm guessing that it's finals, and there's a lot of stress." He said softly. "I am really sorry for making noise." He explained.

"Well, it is dead week, so see that it doesn't happen again."

Kyle didn't even speak to Kenny when they were in the same room. Kenny tried. He texted Kyle his apologies, he told him his apologies out loud, but Kyle didn't budge. He was so hopelessly lost. He didn't know what to do.

"Has Kyle told you anything?" Kenny asked Stan as they walked out of their last final exam.

"He said you're a coward for texting him all your apologies." Stan said softly. "He says how come you won't talk to him, but you do want to text."

"Dude has his headphones on all the time." Kenny said bitterly. "I try all the time, Stanley, to talk to him. Just to get him to hear me out." Kenny said softly.

"Well, it's the end of the term, and Christmas is coming. So, maybe, it'll be back to normal when you come back." Stan said as they headed home.

"So what do I do in the mean time?" Kenny asked bitterly. "Just leave it alone?"

"Yes." Stan said softly. "Just leave it alone."

"But that's my best friend!" Kenny muttered softly.

"Well, if he was either of your best friends," Wendy said grinning. "you wouldn't have, a, violated his journal, and B, commented about how he cuts himself." She said bitterly.

"Go away, Wendellin." Kenny said bitterly.

The weeks went on slowly. Kenny was at his house in South Park hoping he could have a good Christmas with his family. He was really happy to be back home. Of course, he was also looking forward to seeing Bebe and all the other girls. He was a happy camper. He actually managed to put all his troubles out of his mind for a while. That is, until he was on a date, and the worst possible thing happened.

The lady was beautiful. Her name was Tracy, and she was a college student. She was visiting some friends here, in South Park, and she went to a college in LA. Kenny was really happy fate was on his side. He was going to have such fun with her.

They spent the evening playing pool, eating out, and drinking at a bar. She asked him about himself, he asked her. He was really hardly listening to what she was saying. He was too busy staring at her facial features, and her chest, to care. He smiled.

"Want to dance?" he asked as he struggled to keep conversation going.

"Sure!" she said smiling. "I didn't know you dance." She said as she stood up.

He stood up, too. He slipped his arm around her waist, and they walked onto the floor. He was dancing with her before he knew it. He felt so nice, dancing with this beautiful girl. He was staring at her nice waist length red hair, her beautiful green almond shaped eyes. Her full face. She was a ten, in his book. He smiled as his mouth watered. He was going to find a way to seduce the girl. Or his name wasn't McCormick. The McCormick men always got the women they were after. Just ask Kevin. Just ask Stu. Why was Karol still with Stu? She found him irresistible. But why? Because he was a McCormick, yes indeed.

"Oh, Kyle!" Ken moaned as he opened his eyes. "You feel so good."

He was in an unfamiliar room. He was lying next to someone warm, and holding them close. But he couldn't quite believe what came out of his mouth. He looked down at the red hair. He smiled. "Kylee?" he whispered.

That's when he remembered. Her name was Tracy. She wasn't Kyle. Ken was gay, and he did have a crush on the Jew. Fucking god dammit all to hell in a fucking hand basket! He was gay, and Stan had been right. He liked Kyle. But how long had this been going on, and why didn't it show until now? Oh, Kenny was so screwed. He hoped Tracy hadn't heard anything. She was still sleeping, so he was safe.

"Are you serious?" Stan asked as he and Kenny stood in Kenny's room. "You really said that?" he asked.

"Yes." Kenny said softly. "And I looked at this Tracy chick, and I saw that she had red hair, and curls, and dude! Check it out! She even had Kyle's green eyes." Kenny whispered. "But the thing is, I'm not gay. I mean, I just really…, really…, like…, Kyle." He said softly. "He's always been there for me, and he's always cared about what happened to me." Ken said softly. He didn't tell Stan that Kyle had started remembering the way Kenny died. He couldn't. They would have a huge argument that Kenny wanted to avoid right now. He sighed.

"Well, Kyle's mom found out about the cutting." Stan said softly. "So she wants to send him off to a Psych doctor." He said softly. "She wants him to drop out of school, for a while. Maybe just take it easy, she says. She wants to send him to live with some relatives in Jersey." He said sadly.

"Oh hell no!" Kenny shouted bitterly. "Hell no!" he screamed.

He was out the door and down the street before Stan could stop him. He was in his Mysterion suit before anyone noticed. He was leaping across gutters, and roof tops before anyone even knew what was happening. He hoped no one remembered who Mysterion was. Kyle mostly. He saw an open window, and leapt into it. He smirked. He was in Kyle's room. Kyle was sitting there, reading a book. His arms had bandages, and he looked really pale. He sighed. Kyle looked up.

"What the hell?" Kyle gasped. "Mysterion? I haven't seen you in ages." He whispered. "You're the symbol this town needs. Please. I haven't seen you in a long time." He said as he stood up.

"You don't need to rise, for me." Mysterion said softly. "I'm nothing special." He said as he grinned.

"What brings you here?" Kyle asked as he sat back down.

"The rumor mill, and your state of mind." Mysterion said as he shifted his weight from one foot to the other.

"You can sit down, you know." Kyle said as he pointed to the chair.

"Thank you." Mysterion said as he sat down.

"But seriously. What brings you here?" Kyle asked softly.

"Well, I wasn't kidding. I hear you're dropping out of school?" he asked.

"No. I told my mom that I wanted to keep going to school. I promised her that I would take care of my body, and she has to let me keep going to school. This part of life is really tough." Kyle said softly.

"Have you ever considered telling your mom what you tell all your friends?" Mysterion said softly.

"I don't have any kind of clue what my parent's will react to." Kyle muttered softly. "I don't want to be disowned." He muttered. "I hate life, and I hate my being, and I hate life." He said bitterly.

"Kyle, have you ever thought that maybe standing up to your mom and dad is something you need to do in order to make yourself happy?" asked Mysterion bitterly. "Do you want to be a lawyer?" he asked.

"No." Kyle said softly. "I really want to be a doctor. I love helping people. Stan gets all sick around blood, but I really love helping people." He said sighing.

"Maybe it's about time you go and tell them that." Mysterion said as he looked at the room around him. How many times had he slept here, in Kyle's bed, with him? How many times had he slipped into the Broflovski house during rainy nights when he couldn't be at his home? How welcomed had he felt here? By Gerald, by Sheila, by all of the family. He sighed.

"Just think about what I said." Mysterion said softly as he started to back out of the window. "And talk to your friends, too. All of them. Maybe not Cartman, but talk to the rest of them." Mysterion encouraged.

"But I'm in a fight with Kenny." Kyle muttered.

"Well, maybe it's time you two apologize to each other, before everything spins out of control for you, Kyle." Mysterion said softly. "I better go." He said simply. "If you need someone to stand with you while you tell your parents where you're going in life, I'm sure Stan or Kenny would only be too glad to stand with you." He explained smiling into his mask.

"Thanks for the talk, Mysterion." Kyle said grinning. "See you soon." He said as he watched the hero leave.

Kenny was really happy as he made his way back to his house. Stan was gone, but it didn't matter. Everything was going to be all right. He would make it through, and Kyle would make it as well.

The group returned to the college campus a day before term started. Kyle looked really good. He was still avoiding Kenny, but he looked good today. Kenny was relieved that he had decided to continue going to college. He didn't know what he would do if Kyle wasn't going to school with them, but he knew it wouldn't be good. He really liked having Kyle near. But he still kept telling himself that he was not gay. There was just no way that he could be gay. No way at all. McCormick men were lady's men.

"Stan and the guys are all having dinner at Stan's place." Wendy said softly. It was the second week of term. "Want to come?" she asked softly.

"Is Kenny going to be there?" Kyle asked softly.

"Well, yeah. He's part of the group." Wendy said sadly.

"I'll pass." Kyle said as he stared at the ground.

"Kyle, you're going to have to forgive him one day." Wendy said softly. "I just hope you don't take too long." She muttered as she left.

Kyle ate dinner alone that night. He didn't need anyone to have a good time. He could do all kinds of things on his own. He put Old Yeller on and sat with his laptop to watch it. He was half way through the movie, and he already had tears in his eyes. He hoped he wouldn't cry this time.

Who was he kidding. He was bawling by the time they had to shoot the dog. He wanted to run away. He wiped his eyes, and spotted Kenny sitting beside him, on the air mattress. He was watching the movie, too. He was crying, as well.

Kyle waited respectfully, until the movie ended. Then, he turned it off, and got ready for bed.

"What did you eat?" Kenny asked.

Kyle didn't answer.

"You're going to have to talk to me one way or another, Broflovski!" Kenny said as he became angry. "We are roommates!"

"Maybe I'll get a different roommate." Kyle said as he stood up.

"Fine!" Kenny yelled. "You go do that. I don't need you." He muttered as he walked into the bathroom.

"What are you doing?" Kyle asked.

"I'm sleeping in here." Kenny said as he looked over at Kyle sadly.

"You like Kenny?" Wendy asked two days later.

"No." Kyle said as he tried to hide his red eyes.

"You've been crying, and you're gay. You like Kenny." Wendy said bitterly.

"It's dinner time. Aren't you supposed to be at the other apartment cooking?" Kyle asked bitterly as he sat down beside Wendy.

"I came to eat with you tonight." Wendy said as she touched his shoulder.

"I don't need your pity." Kyle muttered.

"You like Kenny." Wendy said as she stared him down.

"So what? He'll never like me back." Kyle said softly.

"You don't know that." Wendy said softly. "You don't know that at all." She said as she smiled at Kyle.

"I do. I'm nothing special. Kenny likes girls." Kyle said as he got up and walked to the kitchen area. "I hate this apartment." He muttered.

"Butters and Stan did okay in here." Wendy said smiling.

"I'm Kyle Broflovski." Kyle said as the door opened. "I am not used to small. I could buy that damn apartment back if I wanted." He said bitterly. "I could afford better then all of you will ever be able to afford." He said as he started looking through the food.

"Why don't you?" Stan asked as he closed the door. He made Kyle jump.

"Leave me alone, Stan." Kyle muttered.

"You guys coming, or not?" Stan asked.

"No." Kyle said bitterly.

"I'm eating with Kyle tonight." Wendy said as she looked over at Stan. "Tell the others not to wait up." She explained.

"See you guys later then." Stan said as he left.

Kenny was sitting in the ninth floor lobby of his apartment building. He was working on a paper, but didn't want to be in the apartment if Kyle was in there. Kyle spent most of his time crying, and listening to depressing songs. Kenny couldn't comfort him, and he felt awkward just being there while Kyle moped and sulked. So, he was sitting in the lobby on the ninth floor, working on school work. A guy came and sat down on the arm chair next to Kenny. He grinned as Kenny closed his book.

"You doin' homework, McCormick?" the boy asked.

"Yeah." Kenny said bitterly. "I was, anyway." He muttered.

"You hear the rumors in the building?" the guy asked.

"I'm not much of a big mouth." Kenny spat. "I don't sit around watching soap operas with the girls, and eating sushi, going, "What's the story today, gals?"." Kenny asked the last question with a girlish lilt to his voice.

"Well, rumor has it, Broflovski's gay." The guy said grinning. "That true?" he asked.

"I don't know. I don't really go around discussing guys sexuality with them." Kenny said as he put his book on the table beside him.

"There's a gold mine of girls heartbroken because he's gay." The boy said as he smiled at Kenny. "I would be gay, if I were him, too. I mean, nerdy? Who do you think would want him if he was straight? I don't see what's so special about—"

Kenny had slammed the guy against the wall of the lobby. Chair and all. He punched the teen in the face, and walked off confidently. He opened a set of double doors, and walked ten flights of stairs down. He didn't say anything to anyone, until he spotted Wendy at the doors to the building.

"Can you take these upstairs for me?" he asked as he handed his books to Wendy. "I'm going to try to find Kyle."

"You finally going to try and tell him how you feel?" Wendy asked grinning.

"I am going to apologize." Kenny said as he stared at her.

"It's all over Facebook, what just happened." She said softly. "You clobbered Bobby Blake in the face."

"He was making fun—"

"I don't care." Wendy said smiling and giggling a little. "You like Kyle Broflovski." She said smiling.

"I hate you." Kenny said as he shoved his things into her arms.

"I'll see you later." She said giggling as she walked through the double doors of the apartment building.

"I hate this…, so fucking much." He said as he walked to the gym. He hoped he could find Kyle.

Kyle was at the gym two weeks later. Midterms were once again almost up on them. He didn't know why, but he was shooting baskets on the basketball court. He didn't feel too bad today. He was actually doing good.

"Broflovski!" someone shouted. Kyle looked up, and saw Kenny staring at him. "Yeah…, you!" Kenny said determinedly. "Get your shit, we're going on a fucking date!" he shouted.

"I'm busy." Kyle said as his face burned.

"I don't care." Kenny said assertively. "You, me, dinner. Meet me at the apartment in half an hour." He said as he left.

Kyle didn't know what to do. He could just ditch the boy. Kenny got ditched a lot. He didn't care. Kyle was just a friend. Kenny was a whore. He didn't want to get hurt by Kenny. Not now. Not ever. But, Kenny would never hurt Kyle. They were supposed to be best friends. He really would never hurt Kyle. There was no reason Kyle was going to be led on by Kenny. Kenny didn't play that way. But how did he know Kyle was gay? Kyle moaned. It was worth it, he supposed, to go and have a look and see what Kenny was going on about.

Kenny was waiting dressed up really nice, outside their apartment. Kyle walked past Kenny, and found a suit to wear as well. He met Kenny fifteen minutes later, and they walked off. Kenny held doors open for Kyle, he treated him like a gentleman should treat his date. Kyle didn't say a word. He and Kenny walked into a Red Robin. It was really busy, and crowded. He laughed bitterly.

"What?" Kenny asked as he smiled at Kyle.

"It's full, Kenny. There's not a single—"

"Are you the McCormick party?" the lady asked smiling at them.

"Yes." Kenny said curtly.

"Your booth is this way." She said as she led them to the back of the restaurant.

"Oh…, my." Kyle gasped as they were seated.

"What would you like to start off with?" she asked.

"Two strawberry lemonades, please, Beth." Kenny said as she walked away. He glanced through the menu. "You all right?" he asked. "What? You didn't think I could be a gentleman?" he asked.

"I'm supposed to be really mad at you." Kyle said bitterly.

"There comes a time in life, Kyle, when you really have to take matters into your own hands. I have to admit, today, when I did…, what I did in the gym, I really thought you would ditch me." Kenny said bitterly. "I figure this was the only way I could get you to truly listen to what I had to say." He explained.

"I'm listening." Kyle said as he hung his head.

"Here you go." Said the lady as she set drinks down in front of both of them.

"Thank you." Kenny smiled at her.

"Kyle," he said as she walked away. "I really miss you. I want you to know that I did not mean to say what I said. There isn't anything that justifies it." He said softly. "I should've tried to be more understanding, and more caring. But, you also have to understand, Kyle, how much you're hurting me when you do that kind of stuff. When I walked up on you, and you were piercing that perfect skin of yours…" Kenny stopped. "I felt like I had been torn apart inside." He muttered.

"Kenny, there was a lot of things I was dealing with." Kyle said softly.

"You couldn't just tell me? If not me, Stan? Or any of us? Your mom, dad? Why did you have to cut yourself?" he asked bitterly.

"Did you know I told my mom and dad over Christmas that I was gay?" Kyle asked softly.

"And?" Kenny asked.

"They weren't very happy with it." Kyle said softly. "They were more unhappy with the fact that I didn't want to be a lawyer, than the fact that I was gay. But you know, I really disappointed them. My mom wanted grandchildren." Kyle said bitterly.

"Ike can give them to her." Kenny said softly.

"Yeah, but I'm her biological sun." Kyle said as he closed his eyes trying to shut away the tears. "They were really disappointed. Ike said that I should be left alone, and if I wanted to do something I should just go ahead and do it. Ike was really supportive of me. But my mom and dad, Kenny, they're disappointed as all hell. Stan, Butters and you don't have to worry about this kind of thing. Your parents aren't that strict with you." Kyle said softly.

"Kyle," Kenny said softly. "I really want to give you some reassurance. Dude, You're a really good looking guy, and you're going to go far in life." He explained. "Let your mom and dad cool off, and talk to you when they feel like doing so. In the meantime, leave them be." He advised.

"But they hate me right now." Kyle muttered as he wiped a tear out of his eye.

"Kyle, they will slowly adjust to the situation. They will slowly adjust to everything that's going on, and they will love you even more. Trust me." Kenny said bitterly. "Just give them time and space." He advised. "I swear, if they're not back to normal by the time you talk to them again, you can yell at me. Just leave them be for now." He said softly.

"Thanks, Kenny." Kyle said as he stared at the table top. "I appreciate that." He muttered.

"You both ready to order?" asked the hostess as she came walking over to them.

"Yes." Kenny and Kyle said at once.

The dinner was amazing. Kenny asked Kyle all about what was happening with him, and for once, he actually listened. He felt at home, and so did the red headed Semite. They were both where they belonged. They had found the other's friendship again, and they weren't going to let that go. They were going to treasure the bond that they had.

At the end of the dinner, Kenny took care of the bill. That was surprising for Kyle, but he felt really happy as he watched Kenny hand the hostess the money. They finished their drinks, and left. Ken was holding Kyle's hand as they left.

"You might want to let go." Kyle said smiling. "People might get the wrong idea." He said as he blushed.

"Let them. I can date whoever I want." Kenny said as he squeezed Kyle's hand.

Kyle was in a daze as they made their way home. Kenny was also in the same state. They both just couldn't believe they had landed up in this situation. They were both so happy. Kenny was just positively beaming as he and Kyle made their way home. Soon, they were at the dorm. They both smiled at each other. Kyle scanned his ID, and the door swung open. They both walked in, and walked to the elevator. There was already a queue of people waiting to board the elevator as well. They all got on, and the machine made its way slowly to the tenth floor. They got off, and Kenny opened the door for Kyle, who went into their apartment and put his coat on the hanger.

"Since tomorrow, is Saturday," Kenny said smirking at Kyle as he closed the door. "I thought you would let me show you a good time." He said smiling. "We could watch some movies, play some games." He smiled politely. "Hang out, and be cool." He smirked again.

They did just that. They watched To Kill A Mockingbird, and they also played a good game of chess. Kyle was teaching Kenny, who just couldn't seem to get the gist of the game. Soon, it was midnight, and they were both sitting on the air mattress, and finishing the game of chess. Kyle cleared away the game, and came back to Kenny, who gently took him into his arms.

"What are you doing?" Kyle asked seriously.

Kenny lifted his face, and kissed his lips with a chased kiss. Kenny felt butterflies in his stomach.

"Kenny, what are you doing?" Kyle asked again.

Kenny pressed his lips gently against Kyle's. He smiled into the kiss, as he sat there, just looking into Kyle's eyes.

"I don't know what I'm doing." Kenny explained. "It looks like I'm kissing you." He said as he kissed Kyle again.

"There's a story you should hear. I don't want to bore you with too many details." Kenny said as he pressed a gentle kiss into Kyle's lips. "But…, there's a stubborn jock out there, who was at his house when you went to visit him one day," Kenny explained as he kissed Kyle again, a little longer this time. "And this jock saw that you left your journal in his house. He returned it, but before he did, he thought it would be funny to randomly pick a page in your journal, and read it. What he found out wasn't really what he expected, so he returned your book, and vowed never to peak again." Kenny said as he bravely started feeling Kyle's ribs, and chest. "The information that this boy found out though, is the reason you were cutting yourself. He relayed it to me, and him and his girl thought it was obvious that I felt the same way. So," Kenny said as he gave Kyle the deepest kiss that night. "they decided to try and give me some tips on figuring out my own emotions. Suddenly, I'm sitting in my apartment, with my best friend since three years old, and I'm kissing him." Kenny said as he kissed Kyle again. "Suddenly, everything is okay." Kenny whispered as he wrapped his arms tighter around Kyle. "Suddenly, Kyle, I realized, that you are so mesmerizing." He whispered. "I just want to make you happy. I also want you not to kill Stan tomorrow." He said softly. "Because he might've just saved your life."

"Kay." Was all Kyle could say as tears fell onto his shirt.

Kenny wiped some tears from Kyle's face. He kissed the boy's cheeks, taking the salty drops into his lips. He smiled as he kissed Kyle.

"I'm right here." He whispered. "Everything is going to be all right." He said as he gently helped Kyle take off his shirt. He wanted to see just how bad the boy had hurt himself.

There was cuts all around Kyle's forearms. All around Kyle's wrists. Kenny felt tears well up in his own eyes as he began to kiss the boy in front of him. Slowly, passionately, Kenny kissed each and every one of Kyle's scars. Kyle was crying now, as he looked at his best friend. Kenny lifted Kyle back into his arms, and kissed him again.

"This is it, Kyle." Kenny whispered. "I don't want you to hurt yourself anymore. I don't want to be the cause of your pain." He said as he gently kissed the boy's lips. "Trust me." Kenny whispered.

"I love you Kenny." Kyle sobbed.

"I love you, too, Kyle." Kenny said as he kissed the red headed boy's temples. "I am pretty sure given the things Wendy showed me about myself over the last few months, that I always have." Kenny whispered.

"Oh, Ken." Kyle whispered as he kissed Kenny back. "Will you make love to me?" he asked softly.

"Yes, Kyle." Kenny said softly. "I will."

He was free. Free of his parents' expectations, free of his low self-esteem. He was okay. He was Jewish, and he was gay. He was also on his way to becoming a doctor. He was also going to make a very good doctor, and going to have a boyfriend. He was going to be what he wanted to be. His reality was strong, and solid. Kenny might die all the time, and come back the next day, or in two weeks, but Kyle wasn't going crazy. It was part of who Kenny was. Part of South Park history. Part of the things the Old ones had done. Kyle would be there for the blond, and the blond would be there for the Red head, as well. Kyle knew that. As he lay there, with Kenny suckling on him, he knew that for sure. He was one of the luckiest boys in the world. And like Kenny said, suddenly, everything was okay.